I can only speak from personal experience. I was a difficult kid. I fall in the category of having an autism spectrum disorder, with the added bonus of ADHD. My father was a police officer who had also been in the military and needless to say, I was raised in, lets say, a strict environment. I acted out frequently and in the 70's and 80's ADHD and ASD, was not understood as it is today. I was called a hyper child and just plain bad sometimes. I was a good student (straight A's) but acted out in school quite frequently. Needless to say I got in my fair share of trouble at home and in school.
Again I can only speak from my personal experience. My father spanked, grabbed, slapped, held me down, etc., quite frequently. When it was going on I never quite liked it, but I think that's the point. I was not supposed to like it. I was supposed to feel uncomfortable. I was supposed to feel like I disappointed my parents in some way. This is how I learned to control my behaviors and to see how I was doing things that were not like the other kids and to curtail my behaviors and act in the way my parents wanted. By my middle teens I began to get it. I began to see how hyper activity (now I understand as ADHD) was getting me into trouble. I began to find outlets for my energy and negative behaviors. I also made sure that I behaved in ways that my parents expected and that made them happy. I in return was given positive feedback that encouraged me to continue to act in the ways that pleased my parents. This is how the world works on a larger scale. I saw this in College and in the work force. Act accordingly, please your bosses, produce and you will be rewarded. If you do not act accordingly, or do not please your boss or produce at work or in school, then you get negative feedback. This is essentially how animals learn behavior. Humans are no different. I can say that if it were not for spanking, corporal punishment etc. I would have turned out totally different. I need that type of feedback. I truly did. There were times when my my mother and teachers etc. tried the softer methods of discipline and I would walk all over them and manipulate them. As I said I was a smart kid. I was also a manipulative kid and I could and still ca sense weakness. In my opinion I was a kid that only responded to physical correction. I can say with certainty that if my father did not have a strong hand with me that I would not be the successful adult I am today. I have seen to many kids that were not disciplined and that did not have that small sense of fear of their parents that turned out horribly. Especially children with ADHD and ASD.
I understand that this take will not be accepted very well by most of the comments I have read prior to mine. I understand the studies and I have read them as well. This has been a topic that has been with me my whole life as I strove to understand why I was different than my peers. Why, did I have trouble socializing, why did I have trouble sitting and listening like all of the other children. Why could I draw a picture, bother my classmates, throw things around the room and still et the highest grades on the test. Hell, half the time I heard the lessons seated (actually pacing in the hallway outside of the room) and still got the best grades. I knew I was different, I just didn't know why. My parents and my father, in particular understood this as well. My father nurtured the things that would go on to make me successful and he made me aware of the things that were going to keep me from being successful. He taught me ways to cope with and outlets for my heightened energy levels. He corrected bad behaviors, yes with corporal punishment. He always explained to me why I was being disciplined. I was never left feeling like I was being hit for no reason or that I was just plain being abused. I understood this was something that was occurring because of something that I had done and that if I was able to learn from it and correct my behavior than it would not happen again. My father was true to his word and as I began to act out less, I was punished much less. These were some of the most important lessons I have learned in my life and for me they would not have sunk in without the physical discomfort and feeling of disappointment that I felt at the time. I say discomfort, as I was never really in any pain looking back. I was never abused or left with and marks or scars. I dare say that I was also not left with any mental scars or trauma as many are saying comes with corporal punishment. Again, in my experience, I look back on my upbringing with fondness and my father was the most influential person in my life.
I know this has been long winded and is an exceptionally long post. (sadly, another consequence of my ASD). I apologize for those who have stuck with me and read through this. I will close by saying that I have a masters degree in occupational therapy, I have a undergrad degree in child psychology and I work in early childhood intervention, with child study teams for children with CP, ASD, ADHD, genetic disorders and a multitude of other factors that cause significant delays in early childhood development. In working with parents that are dealing with children with an ASD or ADHD, I often tell them that children need discipline and discipline is not abuse. Discipline is used to provide feedback and correction for negative behaviors. While there are many passive measures that can be used to provide this type of feedback as well, they often do not work with kids that have extreme poor impulse control. Used and structured correctly, corporal punishment is affective and should never be ruled out 100%. Every circumstance is different and every child is different. Some need this type of punishment. For those who argue the science is settled, this is untrue. The science is never settled. There are arguments on both sides and I am sure I could site just as many studies from psychologists that argue for as there are who argue against. The reason you only see the multitude of those that argue against, is because they fit with the media narrative that corporal punishment is bad. Unfortunately, the predominance of the media has a liberal bias, so that falsely gives an appearance of settled science. As someone else said, If my opinion differs from yours, than its wrong. That, again, unfortunately, is what society has come to. There is no more debate or diversity of thought when it comes to certain issues. IMHO
He was a mess when I got him and I spent a couple years working with him to correct his behavior. Made huge strides and got him to the point where he was pretty normal. But, as he aged and lost eyesight and hearing it all fell apart again and the last few years with him were an absolute nightmare. It’s been four years since he died and I can’t bring myself to consider getting another dog, even after having had them my entire life prior to him. He essentially ruined dogs for me.
