Steps in relationships, when to move to another level?

[Sabeking]

There has been a lot of focus about you not wearing glasses in front of him, my question is when in the world would you tell him about the first and second marriage? If you are pre-engaged I think he would want to know that!

 

[Kathryn Merteuil]

There has been a lot of focus about you not wearing glasses in front of him, my question is when in the world would you tell him about the first and second marriage? If you are pre-engaged I think he would want to know that!

He knows I have been married before. He just doesn't know now many times. Yes I failed to disclose that to him in the beginning. I really did not think it was relevant at the time. Had he come out and asked me, I would have told him, I just never found a way to just volunteer that information and it is like I have waited too long now. He did send me one of those "relationship goals" things about "I know I am not your first love, but I want to be your last", so maybe it is all good.

I know I said I was out, but...this is just so bizarre. OP, why do you feel the need to try and make everything "cute" or "humorous," especially to a group of people who are obviously annoyed or irritated? I've only encountered this one other time on the dis and it was by a woman who was very much like you (except younger) and also seemed very stunted, emotionally.

I have completely admitted that I am doing things all wrong. Yes, you guys are right... I have acknowledged that you guys are right. I am totally agreeing that I am wrong here. I thought a little humor would lighten the mood. Just trying to show I am a good sport and can poke fun at myself.

 

[Pugsly]

I fail to see how all of this (your posts) are "making fun of yourself".

Do you honestly think your behavior is funny? A joke?

Or maybe ... the joke is on us.

 

[Kathryn Merteuil]

I fail to see how all of this (your posts) are "making fun of yourself".

Do you honestly think your behavior is funny? A joke?

Or maybe ... the joke is on us.

In reference to the post in the other thread about "at least this relationship disaster does not involve me" and the post about "see how kind of journaling here turned out for me".

The original intent of this back in May was to be light hearted, humorous and fun... that is definitely not how it turned out.

 

[kashzan]

Seriously Kathryn, Just how much attention do you really need. Enough is enough. I do not post much , but I read the boards every day. And if all of this is real and honest, Then it is the saddest thing ever.And what is sadder is the fact that I believe that you like this nonsense, and the attention. This is not face book, where you said you love the attention. This is a discussion board. It seems as if you are pretending that all these people are your friends, and you can openly air all of this craziness.
Please, please stop this and go and get the help that you so desperately need.

 

[TeresaBelle]

He knows I have been married before. He just doesn't know now many times. Yes I failed to disclose that to him in the beginning. I really did not think it was relevant at the time. Had he come out and asked me, I would have told him, I just never found a way to just volunteer that information and it is like I have waited too long now. He did send me one of those "relationship goals" things about "I know I am not your first love, but I want to be your last", so maybe it is all good.

Did he send this to you on facebook?? You need HELP!!

 

[cabanafrau]

I feel bad I've neglected previously to point out the obvious based on the thread title.

Step one, establish a relationship. This has been accomplished for centuries without Facebook, therefore status plays no part in this.

Two, moving to another level can be considered when both parties mutually agree the relationship is stable and happy and they wish to pursue it further. Once again Facebook is entirely irrelevant to the process.

Hope that helps.

 

[ariel71]

Stop posting what you think are "cutesy" responses when no one is finding them cute or humorous. Please directly answer the question almost everyone has posed:

WHEN WILL YOU GET HELP?


Although I know this post is moot because you won't. You've tiptoed around it every.single.time.

 

[Disney_traveler]

DIS friends, I cannot send you a direct message due to points received from this thread, but I just want to caution you about responding directly because it may cause you to receive points for personal attacks.

Have a great day!

 

[StitchesGr8Fan]

DIS friends, I cannot send you a direct message due to points received from this thread, but I just want to caution you about responding directly because it may cause you to receive points for personal attacks.

Have a great day!

Then the mods need to close this thread. There is nothing productive left to say that won't come across as a personal attack.

 

[Wishing on a star]

I agree with the above two posts.
This is now 21 pages of the same-old, same-old...
There are those who just can't let go, and want to continue beating a dead horse. (on BOTH sides)
It degenerated into personal attacks quite some time ago.

 

[Wishing on a star]

PS: Just throwing this out here... Something I just stumbled upon in an article about, of all people, Donald Trump???
Definitions from the official DSM manual.
Bolding and underlining are mine.

"narcissism, as defined by DSM5, consists of “impairments in self function” — either identity (“excessive reference to others for self-definition and self-esteem regulation”) or self-direction (“goal-setting is based on gaining approval from others”), with “impairments in interpersonal functioning” — either empathy or intimacy (“relationships largely superficial and exist to serve self-esteem regulation..little genuine interest in others...)."

 

[phorsenuf]

I agree with the above two posts.
This is now 21 pages of the same-old, same-old...
There are those who just can't let go, and want to continue beating a dead horse. (on BOTH sides)
It degenerated into personal attacks quite some time ago.

PS: Just throwing this out here... Something I just stumbled upon in an article about, of all people, Donald Trump???
Definitions from the official DSM manual.
Bolding and underlining are mine.

"narcissism, as defined by DSM5, consists of “impairments in self function” — either identity (“excessive reference to others for self-definition and self-esteem regulation”) or self-direction (“goal-setting is based on gaining approval from others”), with “impairments in interpersonal functioning” — either empathy or intimacy (“relationships largely superficial and exist to serve self-esteem regulation..little genuine interest in others...)."

Yet here you are, calling her a narcissist.