So let's say...

[Disney Doll]

I'd let sleeping dogs lie. The more you remind them about it, the more they'll think about it and may end up coming.

It sounds like that is not what you want, so leave it alone.

 

[GRUMPY PIRATE]

Well, you could ALSO tell them that the dates changed, and give a date four days BEFORE you get there, and three days AFTER you leave. Then see if they change . I figure an extra week at WDW might help them get the hint!!

hehehehehhe

and they should buy YOU rum!!!

 

[rie'smom]

I'd let sleeping dogs lie. The more you remind them about it, the more they'll think about it and may end up coming.

It sounds like that is not what you want, so leave it alone.

I'd follow Disney Dolls' suggestion. It's a major pain to have have others on a trip to WDW. At least these people have been.
The worst is when newbies come along and think they know everything. Did it 2x and will never ever as long as I live do it again.

 

[N&B'smom]

I think an email to tell them saying that although their offer was tempting, your trip is already planned and "maybe" you will see them "in passing" during your vacation.

That's what I was going to say! Somehow casually mention that maybe you'll bump into one another if you're there at the same time. That will give them the hint (I hope) that you have no desire to add other people to your already planned trip.

Shelby

 

[JulyGirl]

As long as they don't plan on sharing your DVC unit with you, I wouldn't worry about it. If they do end up going, I would probably suggest you meet for lunch somewhere and spend one day together. You should not have to rethink your plans because they decided to go.

 

[PrincessKitty1]

I agree, I think you should drop it, and if they bring it up again, just say something like, "Maybe we can get together for dinner or drinks once or twice."

 

[jackskellingtonsgirl]

I'd follow Disney Dolls' suggestion. It's a major pain to have have others on a trip to WDW. At least these people have been.
The worst is when newbies come along and think they know everything. Did it 2x and will never ever as long as I live do it again.

They had actually been twice before we took the first group trip. The thing is, they aren't as obsessive as I am, so they had no idea what all they were missing. Now they know they were missing quite a bit.

I am well aware that it is a pain, which is why I didn't think we would be attempting group travel again. Perhaps our friends do not think it is a pain?

We actually LOVE meeting up with DIS folks, having dinner, going to fireworks or hitting some rides, then saying our good-byes. We have met some truly fabulous people that way and it is fun. But with those sort of meets there is no pressure. Nobody expects to stick in a group for 7 days solid -everybody just sort of joins in when it fits their schedules and nobody is offended if people go their separate ways.

It is really, really difficult to be in a group for a week without ANY separate meals or activities. That's why I would have never suggested ANOTHER group trip, because that is pretty much how the previous ones have gone.

 

[rie'smom]

I'd let sleeping dogs lie. The more you remind them about it, the more they'll think about it and may end up coming.

It sounds like that is not what you want, so leave it alone.

They had actually been twice before we took the first group trip. The thing is, they aren't as obsessive as I am, so they had no idea what all they were missing. Now they know they were missing quite a bit.

I am well aware that it is a pain, which is why I didn't think we would be attempting group travel again. Perhaps our friends do not think it is a pain?

We actually LOVE meeting up with DIS folks, having dinner, going to fireworks or hitting some rides, then saying our good-byes. We have met some truly fabulous people that way and it is fun. But with those sort of meets there is no pressure. Nobody expects to stick in a group for 7 days solid -everybody just sort of joins in when it fits their schedules and nobody is offended if people go their separate ways.

It is really, really difficult to be in a group for a week without ANY separate meals or activities. That's why I would have never suggested ANOTHER group trip, because that is pretty much how the previous ones have gone.

I hope it works out for you. When I read your first post I actually got anxious just thinking about our past group trips.

 

[jackskellingtonsgirl]

I hope it works out for you. When I read your first post I actually got anxious just thinking about our past group trips.

I hear you!

When I got home from dinner that night I dredged up my trip report from that first group trip. I wasn't as scathing in the TR as I could have been, but as I read it I remembered how scathing the TR would have been if I had included everything that happened. And I started out so happy going on that trip.

 

[LVSWL]

We have already been to WDW with these friends twice. I thought we were finished with group travel. DH was ready to flog me for not saying "Oh, you can't come with us!" But DH was sitting right there and HE didn't say anything, so he is not going to blame it on me!



They know I haven't booked ADRs yet because we are more than 180 days out. There was quite a bit of discussion prior to the "we'll come with you" announcement, so I don't know if I can back pedal now.

I think that you can ALWAYS back pedal. Sounds like they are your friends, but you don't want to go to WDW with them. We have people make comments almost everytime we go.."let's have a meal together, or let's hang out one day together, or (and this one really freaked me out) so far I have been able to match 3 of your dining ressies and added 3 days at your resort. We learned the very HARD way that you need to be very clear about what you do and do not want to do, otherwise someone else begins to color the mood of your pre-trip and your actual trip. It's not mean or wrong to say (if they bring it up again) that you hope that they have a good time, but this is your family trip.
That being said, we have taken friends several times to stay with us(DVC), but that was our CHOICE and planned and wonderful. No comparison to the drop-ins and the stalkers calling on the phone and showing up at hotels and restaurantsGood luck with this. I know you don't want to hurt their feelings, but if it were me, I wouldn't want to feel the anxiety that you are feeling right now, when you should be just feeling the wonderful anticipation about your trip.

 

[jackskellingtonsgirl]

LVSWL - We just bought our DVC in May. They said something shortly after that about us getting a villa so we can all stay together. I nipped that in the bud by saying "We don't have enough points for that."

They are our friends, but we have already done 2 WDW trips as a group and I felt like it was WAY too much togetherness. I am afraid that saying it out loud would ruin the friendship. I told them they were welcome to go to dinner without us, welcome to sleep in for AM EMH, welcome to go back for a break midday and meet up later, and ALL of those were met with resistance. For the second trip I switched resorts at the last minute. I think they were kind of miffed about that, but it worked out better than being in the same hotel. On the first trip we were all in the same resort and they were upset that the rooms weren't adjoining. Apparently they had requested that without my knowledge.

I think I am going to do nothing. Either they will e-mail their itinerary to me or they will decide not to go.

 

[LVSWL]

LVSWL - We just bought our DVC in May. They said something shortly after that about us getting a villa so we can all stay together. I nipped that in the bud by saying "We don't have enough points for that."

They are our friends, but we have already done 2 WDW trips as a group and I felt like it was WAY too much togetherness. I am afraid that saying it out loud would ruin the friendship. I told them they were welcome to go to dinner without us, welcome to sleep in for AM EMH, welcome to go back for a break midday and meet up later, and ALL of those were met with resistance. For the second trip I switched resorts at the last minute. I think they were kind of miffed about that, but it worked out better than being in the same hotel. On the first trip we were all in the same resort and they were upset that the rooms weren't adjoining. Apparently they had requested that without my knowledge.

I think I am going to do nothing. Either they will e-mail their itinerary to me or they will decide not to go.

That is probably a good plan. Maybe if you do hear from them, it will be a while and your days/adrs will already be set. I know this is hard.

 

[Darcy03231]

I guess I don't see what the big deal is. WDW is a big place. Why can't you both just go do your own thing and meet up occassionally for a meal or a few rides? What would have done if they booked their own trip for those date unbeknownst to you and you saw each other there? That happened to DH and I once on a cruise. We booked not knowing that a large group of people from our church were booked on the same cruise (they all booked through another group they're involved in). We get on board and I look around and said to DH oh that guy at the bar looks like Dick W_____. Well it was! No one was joined at the hip and everyone went off and did there own thing during the day and met up at night for drinks, etc.

 

[jackskellingtonsgirl]

I guess I don't see what the big deal is. WDW is a big place. Why can't you both just go do your own thing and meet up occassionally for a meal or a few rides? What would have done if they booked their own trip for those date unbeknownst to you and you saw each other there? That happened to DH and I once on a cruise. We booked not knowing that a large group of people from our church were booked on the same cruise (they all booked through another group they're involved in). We get on board and I look around and said to DH oh that guy at the bar looks like Dick W_____. Well it was! No one was joined at the hip and everyone went off and did there own thing during the day and met up at night for drinks, etc.

Because that's not how trips with these friends turn out. When I suggest we go our separate ways for a bit one of them gets VERY offended. The statement I heard over and over was "We came on this trip to spend time with you guys!"
If we just bumped into them at WDW all the ADRs and stuff would already be set with very little wiggle room, so that situation would be different.

 

[shirleyb]

I don't assume anything..

Until they actually gave me travel info, I would pretend they are not going.

I would pretend they're not going also. Were you thinking they were planning to stay with you? If not, then if they do go, just suggest you share a few meals and a little bit of park time.

ETA: We went with friends before, but made it VERY clear up front we wouldn't be in each other's pocket the whole time, and it went great!

 

[jackskellingtonsgirl]

I would pretend they're not going also. Were you thinking they were planning to stay with you? If not, then if they do go, just suggest you share a few meals and a little bit of park time.

ETA: We went with friends before, but made it VERY clear up front we wouldn't be in each other's pocket the whole time, and it went great!

No, they weren't going to be in our room. Definitely not. They were just planning to book at the same resort, in the same room category. Of course we would be in the DVC section and they would be in the hotel section.

 

[Keggy]

Are your dates flexible? I would change your trip now and not mention it - then when it is too late I would tell them. But, that is me being totally deceptive. It is probably best for everyone if you were just honest and said to them, we really wanted this trip for some alone time...

 

[EMom]

Because that's not how trips with these friends turn out. When I suggest we go our separate ways for a bit one of them gets VERY offended. The statement I heard over and over was "We came on this trip to spend time with you guys!"
If we just bumped into them at WDW all the ADRs and stuff would already be set with very little wiggle room, so that situation would be different.

Oh, baby, I have been in your shoes. We had friends (The Jones Family) who had a trip planned to WDW for over a year. They had FIRM PLANS to go with "The Smith Family," who were close friends of theirs. They had a set date. A FIRM set date. You get the picture.

DH did not want to go with the Jones Family because they don't seem to know how to say "no" to a child. We prefer children who are under at least a minimum of control. We knew a trip with them would be a bad, bad thing. So we selected a trip date well away from theirs, planned around a special family event. Meaning, we could not change our dates, as they were tied to an event.

Knowing....or so I thought....that the Jones Family was firmly committed to vacationing with the Smith Family (and had been for over a year) I casually mentioned to Mrs. Jones that we were going to WDW. Lord help me, she says that they'd rather go with us than the Smiths!!!! She cancels the long-planned trip with the Smiths (I DID NOT SEE THAT COMING!!!) and tells me they'll come with us!

It's not as if I could stop her. Believe me, if they'd back out on the Smiths, a subtle hint would have had no impact whatsoever. I tried my best to steer them to a different resort, but nothing doing. One saving grace was that we did stay longer than them, so we had some alone time. Otherwise, they wanted to be with us every day. DH was not a happy camper. Can't say I was either.

People ask, "Why did you go on vacation with them in the first place?" Well, I'd planned OUR vacation months away from THEIR vacation that was supposed to be set in stone. How was I to know they'd ditch their other friends and make reservations to come along with us?

OP, pray for them to change their mind, or you need to change your reservation and let them be stuck with theirs. Best of luck. I feel for you.

 

[diznygirl]

Why do people feel it's okay to invite themselves along on a vacation? I don't care how close they are, it's something that should be discussed together and decided together and then planned together.

I hope it all works out for you. Good luck!!!!

 

[Kathi OD]

The e-mails went like this:
The first one was at their request. They wanted an e-mail with our dates so they would be sure to get it right when they called to book. I am a weenie, so I sent the dates.

The second e-mail was to tell them that DH's vacation bid was coming up so the dates might change. We didn't know the bid date at dinner - they announced it on kind of short notice.

The third e-mail was confirming the dates in the original e-mail, minus one day. We are coming home a day early because we can't be sure DH can get that last day off. His company is restructuring the scheduling, so the way things work now may not be the way they work next year.

So really, the e-mails were a courtesy (stemming from their request) to confirm what dates we will be at WDW. The e-mails were also "fishing" to see what the reply would be. Either "Great - see you there!" or "Bummer - we can't make it after all!" The lack of a reply of any sort is making me crazy!

Yes, rum may be in order. Lots and lots of rum.

Gotcha! FWIW, especially with this couple, it might be good to remember that no good deed goes unpunished!