Should I force my kids to go to Disney?

[tasha99]

Curious how that seems like a good solution?

I mean, is it so hard to skip Disney for a year or two? If the kids never turn around, it could become an annual couples trip in just a few years. OP is a DVC member, so she's already staying in an environment where the kids could easily come and go on their own. If that doesn't work for them, why not just do something else. It's easy to rent the points.

 

[Mle8308]

I mean, is it so hard to skip Disney for a year or two? If the kids never turn around, it could become an annual couples trip in just a few years. OP is a DVC member, so she's already staying in an environment where the kids could easily come and go on their own. If that doesn't work for them, why not just do something else. It's easy to rent the points.

The OP posted she has made a decision. She also mentioned she is a big Disney fan. Why should she stay home if she wants to go, especially if she has someone trusted to stay with her kids? Adults make the decisions, not the kids.

 

[Chili327]

I mean, is it so hard to skip Disney for a year or two? If the kids never turn around, it could become an annual couples trip in just a few years. OP is a DVC member, so she's already staying in an environment where the kids could easily come and go on their own. If that doesn't work for them, why not just do something else. It's easy to rent the points.

Yes they definitely could go elsewhere, rent out the points etc, my thoughts were she still wants to go to WDW, so she most certainly should if that's what she wants to do. I wouldn't let a bratty teenager ruin my vacation, or keep me from going. lol

 

[Mle8308]

Yes they definitely could go elsewhere, rent out the points etc, my thoughts were she still wants to go to WDW, so she most certainly should if that's what she wants to do. I wouldn't let a bratty teenager ruin my vacation, or keep me from going. lol

100%!

 

[luvnwdwgal]

I am the Disney obsessed rope drop to close person in the group and I probably do expect too much from them. These are all good ideas.

I don’t blame them for not wanting to go then. That’s not for everybody. It’s their vacation too. Just because you pay for it doesn’t necessarily mean you should control every minute of the day. I have never been a rope drop/park close person, but if I were I would never expect everyone else to have to do the same. Loosen the reins. I think you’ll see that it helps.

 

[TippyThomas]

No, you shouldn't.

 

[Chili327]

I don’t blame them for not wanting to go then. That’s not for everybody. It’s their vacation too. Just because you pay for it doesn’t necessarily mean you should control every minute of the day. I have never been a rope drop/park close person, but if I were I would never expect everyone else to have to do the same. Loosen the reins. I think you’ll see that it helps.

Yes, that is good advice... they shouldn't let a fanatic ruin their vacation either, I am also not a rope drop type.
Let them do their thing at Disney, it may not be how you would spend your time, but it is their vacation too.

 

[TwoMisfits]

I'd rent the DVC points or pool them for a future year trip and go somewhere else this year.
Kids are only young once, and they won't be traveling with you anyway in a few years.
I'd rather make family memories now where we could all be happy.
It's not like they haven't already let you know in previous years they no longer liked the trip.

 

[fly girl]

We have 5 kids. We do frequently go on other trips (the beach, Europe to visit family, the mountains) and they’re fine with them, it’s just Disney they complain about. I guess that’s why it upsets me, they’re fine going other places. I just don’t get it I guess.

OP here. We do go on other trips together, they’re mostly ok with those. Just not Disney. We’re DVC (and I’m a huge Disney fan) so we’re going to go yearly no matter what. I guess I’m just sad that they don’t want to go. I’ll talk with them about letting them do their own thing and see what they say. I’ve decided to just let them stay home if they want and I hope that one day they’ll want to go back again. On the plus side, if they don’t go we would be saving a decent amount of money!

I think deep down you do "get it" you just don't want to because you love Disney so much. Understandable. However, think of it this way, you raised young adults who will speak up for themselves. May not be what you want to hear, but you didn't raise milquetoast.

When you do talk with them make sure you stand by your word that you will let them do their own thing. Don't make them feel guilty for not going to rope drop.

We do this on cruises with my dd. I know she doesn't want to hang out with adults all day on the ship, so she takes off with her friends (they initially meet day 1 in teen club, but then venture all over.) Our only caveat is meeting for dinner and abiding curfew. It becomes a win/win since we all have fun and no one is complaining.

Whatever they decide, I am glad you aren't forcing them to go. That just makes for a miserable and expensive trip.

 

[Forevermarypoppins]

On our last two trips, 2 of our kids (now ages 18 and 16) were absolutely horrible. They don’t want to leave the room, when in the parks they complain about absolutely everything and whine constantly about just wanting to go back to the resort. They whine and complain incessantly. They made the rest of us miserable. The thing is, we’ve gone to WDW every year of their lives and they’ve always loved it, not sure what’s happened lately. While talking about our next trip they both said they don’t want to go and are begging us to just let them stay home. DH thinks we should let them stay since they’re miserable there anyway, but for me, this is a family trip and it wouldn’t feel right going without them. Plus it feels like they’re being brats and getting what they want. It really upsets me that they don’t want to go. But if I make them go they’ll be absolutely miserable. Anyone been through anything similar? Any advice?

Honestly, GO WITHOUT THEM!!!!!

But do NOT leave them home alone. Arrange for ADULT supervision whether its both of them of separately. Even it shortens your trip to 4 or 5 nights, It's going to be fun! Adult only WDW are awesome!!!

 

[gottalovepluto]

OP here. We do go on other trips together, they’re mostly ok with those. Just not Disney. We’re DVC (and I’m a huge Disney fan) so we’re going to go yearly no matter what. I guess I’m just sad that they don’t want to go. I’ll talk with them about letting them do their own thing and see what they say. I’ve decided to just let them stay home if they want and I hope that one day they’ll want to go back again. On the plus side, if they don’t go we would be saving a decent amount of money!

True, you'll save a nice chunk of change!

I do get the rewarding bad behavior concern. Are they displaying this behavior in other aspects of your life, making you or others in the family miserable until they get what they want? If it was a peculiar thing to that one trip you probably aren't in danger of re-enforcing a spoiled/selfish attitude.

 

[fly girl]

Adult only WDW are awesome!!!

Dh and I did this last summer for 3 days. We had a blast!! Just wandering around World Showcase getting a bite and a drink made for a perfect adult afternoon.

 

[DCLMP]

I am the Disney obsessed rope drop to close person in the group and I probably do expect too much from them. These are all good ideas.

Under those conditions I would not want to go with you either.
I’d give them the option to stay home or go and be turned loose.

 

[rwdavis2]

Go to Universal. As our kids got older they liked it better.

 

[FreeTime]

Honestly, GO WITHOUT THEM!!!!!

But do NOT leave them home alone. Arrange for ADULT supervision whether its both of them of separately. Even it shortens your trip to 4 or 5 nights, It's going to be fun! Adult only WDW are awesome!!!

The 18 year old is an adult and also could be considered the adult of the 16 year old. There is no need to have a babysitter for an adult child.

 

[Skywalker3]

Oh yeah, this has totally happened to us in the last 2 years.
DD, now 19, loves DIsney, but just became nearly intolerable to be around, do anything with. That was at home as well though, She's finally come around.
DS, 16, could totally leave Disney behind, if there were other options. He'll go with us, but he's pretty much only interested in a few thrill rides a day, then he goes back to the room, and watches TV, movies, or plays Switch, etc. He's not very social, and really needs that downtime, out of the crowds, just relaxing.
Both want other destinations, but we also own DVC, and it's familiar and easy to go to Orlando. But we KNOW we need to branch out eventually.....
Solution for us: IF they go to Disney with us, we totally agree to doing our own things, and splitting up. Sometimes that overlaps, like for rides like GotG, but sometimes not. THey have money, their phones, etc, and we just do what we want.
I do totally get being sad about it. We've had so many happy times, happy memories of Disney trips, from toddlers to young adulthood, and it's sad to realize those kiddie days are gone. But just have to find a new happiness. .
I"m about to take a spring break trip. DH went on a solo trip in Jan, so he's probably not going. It was going to be just DS and me, and he is making sure the Roku stick is packed. All of a sudden, this week, DD decided to join us....hoping we all have a great time.
We do also do Univeral trips, either on its own, or now add a few days to the DIsney trip. Have 3 days there for spring break. We all love the thrill rides there, HHN, etc.and kids have a lot more to ride. SeaWorld for coasters was great too.
Good luck planning.

 

[Magical2017]

I would not force a trip, especially if they have been before. Our kids prefer Universal, but we have been going to other places in the world and having them help us in the planning process. I know this is a Disney site and I'm not knocking Disney, but it's just not at the top of our list right now.

Wherever we go, we ask everyone to pick something they want to do so they are invested in the trip. We allow a rest day where people can chill in the room/Air B and B, etc. and then those who want to explore can do so.

 

[GoingSince1990]

If it looks like they are not having fun, you can always use Chevy Chase’s approach from “National Lampoon’s Vacation”.

 

[elaine amj]

When DS was 16/17, I always had to make sure every family vacation included downtime in the hotel room for him to play his games and talk to his friends.

We did a big 2 week Disney vacation with my brother’s family at that time and my deal with him was to smile and actively participate in all the together time and I would make sure he had a bunch of quiet solo time sprinkled throughout the trip. Sleep in mornings, times he’d head back to the room after lunch, entire break days, etc.

He did great and was cheerful throughout.

He did tell me later that he was dumb those years for not appreciating a Disney vacay and at 20, excitedly brought his best friend along to join us for a 3 week Disney trip.

 

[CdnCarrie]

I get this is a Disney board but I would get so bored going every year.
Sometimes I’m on a ride like Peter Pan and think how I’ve probably ridden it 20 times in my life.
Maybe take a break from Disney.
I love it every 3 years.