School field trip, bathing suit guidelines

[luvsJack]

I have raised two boys and have a 17 year old girl. Boys look at girls, and girls look at boys. Fact of life. And yes it start in middle school. They may not talk about it, but they look. And it doesn't matter if the girl is in booty shorts or baggy jeans, they still look. Same with what the boys are wearing, doesn't matter.

Our kids learn just fine in this deep south heat in shorts that reach their fingertips and school tshirts or polos. And no one has to worry about someones hinny hanging out.


As for swimsuits, they should have just said one piece or non bikini two piece or they can wear a tshirt over the suit. Boys should wear board shorts or similar.And been done with it.

 

[Kimberlyann11]

I think we all need to talk about what's really important here....


What's this I'm reading about pink armpit hair being the latest fashion trend?????

I am actually encouraged by this. I have always thought that it was sexist as hell that girls were expected to shave their pits and legs and the guys were never expected to. And to add to that, any woman under thirty is now expected to shave everywhere. What a waste of time. On another board there was a discussion about women shaving their feet of all things and how it's gross to wear sandals without shaving your toes. Like they're a bunch of frickin' hobbits or something. Girls are being taught to be embarrassed about something as petty as armpit hair. I say dye that crap and let it fly!!

Dress codes, on the other hand are not a huge deal. It's easy to say that the parents should decide, but there are a lot of parents these days who don't have the common sense of a goose. On another board that I go to we have a parent who goes off the deep end every year about the dress code. She's one of the dimmest people on the planet, but the dress code issue brings out a whole new level of duh. It's pretty obvious that her kid wants to wear clothes showing both London and France and she just doesn't want to say no to the snow. We couldn't wear tank tops when I was in school and it didn't damage our tender little psyches.

 

[luvsJack]

Dying arm pit hair? Yuck. I am all for things not being sexist but thats just a bit much. So glad that is not a fad dd will be embracing.

 

[Mkrop]

I would love if all boys (and girls) were taught to respect one another, but I dont think it is the school's job to teach that morality, so it is easier to have the dress code. I know I am teaching my boys to be respectful and it doesnt matter what the person is wearing etc, but there are many parents who dont and dont care, they cant even be bothered to do basic parenting let alone teaching morality...maybe just maybe this is what the school is trying to protect your DDs from, the boys who are not taught to be respectful, who dont get that message from home.

And I just threw up a little at the thought of dyed armpit hair or letting that hair go...ewwwww

 

[tvguy]

I guess the broader issue that I don't understand is, why does it seem that people are so prone to question school rules these days?

I sure wasn't aware of any debate over rules when I was in public school*.

My kids went to private school, and that is a little different. Private schools generally have some clause in their admission contracts that if you don't like their rules, you are free to enroll your child elsewhere. So there was never any debate.


*Okay, I do remember in elementary school a line of angry moms outside the Principals office on a Friday morning , when the school lunch menu said they were serving hamburgers instead of the usual fish, or macaroni and cheese. It was a misprint, they WERE serving a non-meat entree, but as a non-Catholic , it was lost on me. And it was before Vatican II. I gather that would no longer be an issue, although I do know a few Catholics born decades after Vatican II that still don't eat meat on Friday.

 

[mjkacmom]

Was it during Lent? Most people I know abstain from eating meat on Fridays during Lent.

 

[LilPiglet]

I never had a end of the year school field trip that involved swimming, but if I did I probably wouldn't want to go. For one I don't even own a One Piece Swimsuit and I wouldn't want my parents to buy me one for just probably 1 use. I only have two bikini style swimsuits and they aren't the type that show off way to much skin or flaunt anything(I have nothing to flaunt anyway), but my parents wouldn't allow me out of the house if I tried to wear a thong bikini bottom or a really skimpy bikini top. I just think the school should have thought of another end of the year trip that didn't have parents questioning what style of swimsuit to have there kid wear or even have to buy one. Don't get me wrong I think the swimming trip would be fun, but I bet some kid is going to show up in something that is inappropriate.

 

[pryncess527]

I guess the broader issue that I don't understand is, why does it seem that people are so prone to question school rules these days?

I sure wasn't aware of any debate over rules when I was in public school*.

Because questioning authority is healthy? I have no problem following rules, but I do expect that in most cases, if a rule is justified then the authoritative body should be prepared to defend the rationale for that rule.

When I was in high school on the 90s, my class organized a walk out in support of a male student who wanted to wear a long skirt.

 

[tvguy]

Was it during Lent? Most people I know abstain from eating meat on Fridays during Lent.

I don't recall, but I believe prior to Vatican II, and my Catholic friends tell me that prior to Vatican II, meat was forbidden on Fridays.

 

[Dawnlight]

I guess the broader issue that I don't understand is, why does it seem that people are so prone to question school rules these days?

I sure wasn't aware of any debate over rules when I was in public school*.

I think part of the problem is that in previous generations the school rule book and guidelines were a few simple pages. The school trusted parents, for the most part, to make appropriate decisions for their child. Now, the rule book is hundreds of pages long (yes, hundreds!), and every last little thing is subject to a rule instead of common sense.

When there is so much regulation and erosion of parental rights, they'll be push-back from parents; rightly so.

 

[tvguy]

Because questioning authority is healthy? I have no problem following rules, but I do expect that in most cases, if a rule is justified then the authoritative body should be prepared to defend the rationale for that rule.

When I was in high school on the 90s, my class organized a walk out in support of a male student who wanted to wear a long skirt.

Having questioned authority a few times myself, I agree questioning authority can be healthy....but IMHO fighting restrictions on a bathing suit just doesn't rise to the same level as disagreements over curriculum, safety, things like that. Just seems petty.

 

[tvguy]

I think part of the problem is that in previous generations the school rule book and guidelines were a few simple pages. The school trusted parents, for the most part, to make appropriate decisions for their child. Now, the rule book is hundreds of pages long (yes, hundreds!), and every last little thing is subject to a rule instead of common sense.

When there is so much regulation and erosion of parental rights, they'll be push-back from parents; rightly so.

Again, bathing suits on a field trip just seems petty.

I also wonder if the school has some check and balance where those in power can discuss whether something is appropriate. Where the final decision is not just in one person's hands.
My son had a brief issue in High School with a teacher of his first class after lunch. She kept sending him to the attendance office to buy a razor and shave cream because by 1 pm......and because he inherited my dense facial hair gene......he didn't look clean shaven. Shaving once a day 5 days a week is tough enough with acne, but twice a day was destroying his skin. I figured I was going to have to get a Doctor's note, but the Attendance Vice Principal.....who never though he really needed a shave.......asked him to just poke his head in her office every morning when he got there at 730 am. She would then send an e-mail to that 1 pm teacher that "Johnny stopped by my office this morning, and he is clean shaven". The teacher finally told him he no longer had to stop by the attendance office, and that she would no longer question if he was clean shaven.

 

[Diznygrl]

I am actually encouraged by this. I have always thought that it was sexist as hell that girls were expected to shave their pits and legs and the guys were never expected to. And to add to that, any woman under thirty is now expected to shave everywhere. What a waste of time. On another board there was a discussion about women shaving their feet of all things and how it's gross to wear sandals without shaving your toes. Like they're a bunch of frickin' hobbits or something. Girls are being taught to be embarrassed about something as petty as armpit hair. I say dye that crap and let it fly!!

Dress codes, on the other hand are not a huge deal. It's easy to say that the parents should decide, but there are a lot of parents these days who don't have the common sense of a goose. On another board that I go to we have a parent who goes off the deep end every year about the dress code. She's one of the dimmest people on the planet, but the dress code issue brings out a whole new level of duh. It's pretty obvious that her kid wants to wear clothes showing both London and France and she just doesn't want to say no to the snow. We couldn't wear tank tops when I was in school and it didn't damage our tender little psyches.

Part of me agrees with you. The part that absolutely HATES to shave and only does the bare minimum just to get by. Yeah, it WOULD be rather nice if women weren't expected to shave all of their body hair.

But then there's the other part of me that can't seem to let go of the idea of armpit hair being gross. And then drawing even more attention to it by dyeing it unnatural colors. Bleh.

 

[LBIJim]

I suspect the whole reason they have the rule is because what some parents thought was appropriate, wasn't.

Right, because some parents think it's entirely appropriate to let, even encourage, their pre-teen kids to dress like skanks.

I don't recall, but I believe prior to Vatican II, and my Catholic friends tell me that prior to Vatican II, meat was forbidden on Fridays.

Yes, it was for ALL Fridays, not just during Lent.

 

[mamacatnv]

I guess the broader issue that I don't understand is, why does it seem that people are so prone to question school rules these days?

Because the schools are reaching into our homes and personal lives - they are regulating their agendas and we as parents IMO need to push back

I think part of the problem is that in previous generations the school rule book and guidelines were a few simple pages. The school trusted parents, for the most part, to make appropriate decisions for their child. Now, the rule book is hundreds of pages long (yes, hundreds!), and every last little thing is subject to a rule instead of common sense.

When there is so much regulation and erosion of parental rights, they'll be push-back from parents; rightly so.

The dress code section of my DD's handbook is ridiculous.

Right, because some parents think it's entirely appropriate to let, even encourage, their pre-teen kids to dress like skanks.

Skank is subjective and why does the school get to dictate how someone dresses their kid? Appropriate is subjective as well.

I think the schools need to shut up and back off, return to the priorities, teaching our kids not worrying if someone can see Suzys' shoulders or if her shorts don't come to her finger tips etc.

 

[tvguy]

Because the schools are reaching into our homes and personal lives - they are regulating their agendas and we as parents IMO need to push back
.

I respectfully disagree. They are only regulating what is happening at the school.

 

[sam_gordon]

why does the school get to dictate how someone dresses their kid?

So you are ok with kids wearing anything to school? Shirts that say "**** happens"? Bikini tops and cutoff blue jean shorts? Boys wearing pants with the waist below their buttocks? After all, as long as the parents think it's appropriate, the kids should be allowed to wear it, right? You would think it would be "common sense", but not everyone has "common sense".

 

[luvsJack]

Because the schools are reaching into our homes and personal lives - they are regulating their agendas and we as parents IMO need to push back

The dress code section of my DD's handbook is ridiculous.

Skank is subjective and why does the school get to dictate how someone dresses their kid? Appropriate is subjective as well.

I think the schools need to shut up and back off, return to the priorities, teaching our kids not worrying if someone can see Suzys' shoulders or if her shorts don't come to her finger tips etc.

How are they reaching into our homes with a dress code?

Dd has to wear khaki or black shorts with school color polos or tshits to school. And closed toe shoes. Shorts have to come to her fingertips.

She is out for summer. She either has on nike shorts, or jean short that come no where near her fingertips. Her swinsuit is a bikini that she would have to wear a tshirt over if with the school.

The school has not reached into our home, she just has to wear school appropriate clothing to school just like I have to wear work appropriate clothing to work.

Dress codes aren't new. We had one when I was in school. My sister had a stricter one before me.

 

[Mkrop]

It's amazing that some people are ok with schools reaching into our homes to teach morality and sex ed etc, but heaven forbid they should tell my child to not wear a camisole to school.

 

[mnrose]

Nope. Dress codes aren't "new" at all. When I was in grade school (admittedly in the dark ages...LOL), girls HAD to wear a dress to school. No pants permitted. This was in Minnesota. And, included the winter time. In the winter, we wore pants under our dress until we got to school, and then we had to take the pants off. SMH. My parents wouldn't dream of questioning the dress code. They complied. Easy.

I have ZERO problems with reasonable dress codes. The only reason they are necessary is because there ARE trashy parents out there who think it's fine to have their "snowflake" where a t-shirt with swear words on them, or shorts that have their **** hanging out. Dress appropriately for school and there's no problem.

My D does have some issues with the "fingertip" rule for dresses. She is quite tall, and dresses simply aren't sized for girls who have as much leg as her. Still, she CAN find things that are appropriate, and the other dresses can be worn other places. (BTW, she always wears bootie shorts under her dress, which seems to be the custom at least in her school).