School Absences & Doctors excuses

[Michelle67]

That would make me angry as well. Doctors can't do a blessed thing about viruses, but every time your child has one you are supposed to take your child to the doctor (and run up a lovely bill) just so your doctor can write you a note that says your child is sick and then tell you to give him/her lots of fluids and rest? I'd be fighting it. As jodifla said, not everyone has medical insurance, and as someone else mentioned, this is the kind of thing that leads to people sending sick kids to school and illness running rampant through the school.

 

[aprilgail2]

10 sounds like a lot, but if your kid gets really sick more than once, it's easy to get to. Before DD had her tonsils out, she missed that amount due to strep in just one term.

Before my daughter had her tonsils out she missed 30+ days of school in one year! The district policy is if you miss over 30 days they have the option to leave a child back a grade but if your child is at or above grade level in grades/testing they dont do it.
I do not run my child to the DR everytime they are sick, and if our school had that rule I would just send my kid into school, have them tell the teacher when they got their that they did not feel good and let the school call me to come get them-then it is going home early, not being absent! I can play the same games they do.

 

[MiniGirl]

Before my daughter had her tonsils out she missed 30+ days of school in one year! The district policy is if you miss over 30 days they have the option to leave a child back a grade but if your child is at or above grade level in grades/testing they dont do it.
I do not run my child to the DR everytime they are sick, and if our school had that rule I would just send my kid into school, have them tell the teacher when they got their that they did not feel good and let the school call me to come get them-then it is going home early, not being absent! I can play the same games they do.

I've read this several times on this thread. Our district the same rules apply if the child is sent home or stays home. If they child is sent home before 12:30, they need to bring in a doctor's excuse or it becomes an unexcused absence, so I would have to send my child to school sick and miserable for 4 1/2 hours and risk having everyone else get sick. We also do not have 30 days in the school year. We have 6 a semester and every absence is unexcused unless you bring in a doctor's note. Fortunately, we have pretty good insurance, so I just pay the $17 co-pay at the doctor's office.

I will also add that my youngest (who is still in public school) is in first grade. We like to take several day trips to Disney and I take her out for those. At this stage, I think having fun and playing with your family is as important as school. She is doing very well, so we choose to spend those unexcused absences doing this instead of sitting home sick watching tv. We prefer those days be excused.

 

[kellyg403]

I struggle a lot with the attendance policy in our schools. Not because I don't agree but sometimes I don't think every virus/illness requires a trip to the dr. There has been nasty 48 hour virus going around that had all five of the teenagers home. I could not send them to school but I knew that it was virus as several of their friends had it, their sibs were catching it and getting better in a few days etc. Why should I get a dr's note for something like that? As a mom, I have seen illness come and go and know when I need to take the kids to the dr., I really don't need the school district to tell me when that is necessary. Besides, when I need an appointment at the dr I already have to wait, very rarely can you get in the same day. A friend of mine works at the emergancy department and she said that the emergancy room is filled with people with the flu getting dr's notes because the urgent cares are closed or their docs can't get them in. Never thought that was the purpose of the emergancy room but that is just me.

Aside from the money factor, our area is getting hard hit with jobs being lost, so I would imagine that they are losing health insurance as well. This is an unnecessary drain on the finances if it is the common cold/flu.

While I understand the concept, I understand the 'few bad apples' causing the rule to be applied across the board, I still struggle with the fact that sometimes illness happens. The kids very rarely miss school. This year ds12 has had strep twice, the flu last week that caused him to miss two days and then in December he had a case of pnuemonia. For some reason, puberty has not been kind to his immune system, he is catching everything. Looking at his school records the school can see he is not one for chronic absences. Now, when I do have to take him to the doc I always get a note for the school. But, in our district, excused/unexcused the kids get 10 days a year before they are held back for attendance issues whether they are straight A or not. I also hate the threatening letters I have gotten twice from the school informing me ds has missed 6 days, what the NC statute is for truancy etc. and how DSS could get involved. Seems like a waste of DSS time when they have other bigger and pressing problems.

So, yeah its the rule, I follow it but really I don't like it much! Feel like parents aren't stupid and the reason we are having so many problems with attendance is because WE are sending the kids in because we have no choices but let the school send them home!

Kelly

 

[Pembo]

My friend's 2nd grader has mono. He hasn't been to a full week of school in a month. The first week after the dx, she sent him and told him to call home if he didn't feel good. She also sent a note to the teacher explaining what she told him, he has mono...etc. She also called the school office and explained. He told the teacher mid-morning he wanted to go home, she sent him back to his seat. He told her again after lunch, she again had him stay in the room-in the comfy chair. He came home crying.

After that my friend either keeps him home all day or takes him in late. And everytime she calls they say...he sure is missing a lot of school and everytime she says HE HAS MONO!

As a teacher, I'd rather you keep your sick child home then send them, not feeling well, to school. They won't learn much if they are sick and they are spreading their germs.

 

[Jsme]

I don't know if I'm venting, looking for others who had similar situations, or just asking for flames, but here's the story.

The first part of the school year youngest DS, in 6th grade, missed I think about 10 days of school due to different things...1 bout of strep throat, one nasty cold, and then he had a few mornings where he had diarreah or even a puke or 2, for which I refuse to send him to school (tweaked his pm/am diet and that worked itself out. We all have sensitive stomachs in the fam) Anyway, the days added up.

So now the school is asking for a doctors excuse for any absences from here on. Their letter stated that a parent's excuse blank will no longer suffice. Now, I'm a little offended. I know that it's a generic rule they have, but what the heck? Like now my own judgement isn't good enough? Do those teachers for real want a puking, feverish kid in their classroom?

So I tend to be a rule follower, didn't question it. Now here we are and kiddo has a bad cold this morning. You know the kind where you have a low fever, sore throat and just all over feel bad? I just would not normally take him to the doctor for this - it's just a virus and there is nothing a doctor could/should do for it. Taking him in is a waste of our time and money and it takes up an appointment that another really sick person could use. Gave him cold medicine and sent him to school but feel bad about it.

I feel like having a talk with the principle...a nice talk....just so he knows we are not slacker parents who are just letting the kid skip out whenever he wants. And we are not....you know how you can see it in the kids eyes, that glossy look, when they are feeling really lousy? Yea, he felt really lousy this morning.

I don't know, I guess I'm just venting, but there are times that I do sincerely understand why people homeschool.

I am taking the chance on being flamed until eternity here....but....

I am an attendance secretary in a High School. I handle the attendance for 1600 students and 150 staff. In my district per Central Office each school can set their own policy. However, they do have to go by certain State (DPI) guidelines. These guidelines are strict. There are always some room for wiggle but it sounds like something is going on at your school. It may be that if a student is out a specific amount of days the school must have doctor's notes in order to pass your student. There are all kinds of reasons why you would need and the school would require a doctor's note. I know at my HS after 10 days if the student plays sports half of all absences must be documented by doctor's notes. Also our handbook states ... students are allowed 5 days of absense per 9 week with a max of 10 in a semester after 10 days the student could receive a failing grade. First, I would go back and read the handbook. It is always good to be prepare. I suggest that because this may clear up alot. If it is written in the handbook then you really have no way to question the situation. That does not mean you can not question only that it is in writing and the school's opinion is you have had it available to you all year. Once you have read the handbook call the school. Start with the Attendance person. If you are not happy from there ask her/him who you can talk with from there. They can point you in the correct direction. Now if this is not stated in the handbook that does not mean policy can not change. That is why they sent out a message telling you of the change. Hope this helps.

 

[Aneille]

They seem to think that they are the parents and not us I actually have to start keeping track of my son's exercise activity for gym. They require at least 30 minutes per day, outside of school gym class, including weekends. Now my son goes way over this time but how is it any of their business what activities my son participates in, outside of school. I think these school systems need to remember who the parents are and but out of our business, unless they have a REAL reason to be concerned. Sorry to hijack post and rant over. lol

I have never heard of such a thing!

If you have mutiple hours in one day can you break it up? Seriously if you couldn't my kids wouldn't pass.

My kids play a lot of hockey and they will get in mutiple hours in during the weekend and some weekdays. My oldest gets about 6-7 hours of organized activity in each week and my 5 year old averages about 6 hours (not all hockey but most during the winter). So due to the multiple hours put in on Saturday and 1 weekday, they still get days off with nothing to do. If they don't want to play outside, I don't make them. And the school would be hearing from me in a big way if they got in trouble for that.

Seriously the school should not be logging the kids activities.

 

[ckay87]

Thanks for your message Jsme, and it does make sense. A rule is a rule, and I'm following so far. I did let the kid stay home yesterday, took him to the doc, apologized to the doc for wasting her time and returned the $15 (co-pay thank God) note to the school today.

I'm just kind of starting to think that if these are the rules they want to go by, perhaps they should start taking some real, solid measures to help kids stay healthier. How about Purell stations at the lunch line or Lysol for the desks (they change classes, so how many kids share one desk)? I was never a germ-o-phobe at all, but I never had to force my sick kid to go to school before either.

 

[manning]

My DD6 has missed 16 days this term. The first term, she didn't have any missed days.

Lana's teacher said if the office questions it, she'll go in there and back me up. She said there's a difference of keeping a child home, just to keep a child home and them staying home because they are truly sick. My DD only stays home if she has any kind of fever (100 or up) or she's puking. There's other more serious reasons too, but that would require a Dr.'s visit, no question.

She was out a full week in December and a full week in February with some missed in between. On Friday of both those weeks I took her in because her temperature would not stay down. Both times the Dr. did nothing and didn't see any infection and said she just needs time to get better.

She's doing really well in school and I pick up anything that DD has missed when she was away.

We haven't had any troubles or asking for Dr.'s notes yet. I'm crossing my fingers that DD doesn't miss anymore school due to illness. She's missed entirely too much, but it's not mine or DD's fault.

IMO here's the key. If the child is doing passing work what is the problem? If they are failing then there should be concern.

A lot of this is driven by school funding by the state. Schools are given money based on a daily head count. I remember when I was in school a student was doing "A" work. She had missed two weeks due to illness and had her grade lowered because of it. She was still doing "A" work.

Grades should be given according to work done !!!

 

[Bluestars]

I guess I can understand how a school would ask for a doctor's note after 10 absences. That is a lot. Other then when my daughter had pneumonia, I don't think any of my kids have missed more than two or three days each year, sometimes none, for being sick.

I guess they have to draw the line somewhere, otherwise neglectful parents will just say their kid is sick all of the time and there would be nothing the school could do about it. It is unfortunate that the parent's note isn't enough. Doctor's visits are expensive.

 

[Jsme]

Thanks for your message Jsme, and it does make sense. A rule is a rule, and I'm following so far. I did let the kid stay home yesterday, took him to the doc, apologized to the doc for wasting her time and returned the $15 (co-pay thank God) note to the school today.

I'm just kind of starting to think that if these are the rules they want to go by, perhaps they should start taking some real, solid measures to help kids stay healthier. How about Purell stations at the lunch line or Lysol for the desks (they change classes, so how many kids share one desk)? I was never a germ-o-phobe at all, but I never had to force my sick kid to go to school before either.

I totally agree but ... believe it or not it is against the rules (of my states) to use disinfectant type items in the schools. Or it is in my State. Sounds crazy huh? I totally believe it is but the reason behind that is some students are allergy to these products and ingredients in this items build up in the classroom making the fumes dangerous. However, I know many teachers who spray down the room and wipe down desks. When my DS was in 3rd or 4th grade he kept strep. He would go on a round of antibotics and then go off and within a week be back on an antibotic for strep again. From talking with the teacher strep was going thru the whole class like this. It was a nasty cycle. She told me point blank that she was using disinfectant wipes and Lysol in the room daily.

There are many things the school system has to do that really seems so unfair. I have a worked in retail, banking and the school system. The school systems seem to have to do crazy things but once you understand the rationale it makes more sense. I know some of the things I am required to do goes against many things I believe in but I try to see the reason behind them.

Hope this helps.

I know all of that may sound nuts but if you know why it at least helps you to understand. I am afraid soon they will tell us no more Purell in the rooms. After all doctors are saying it is not healthy to use.

 

[Jsme]

Oh let me add this.

I see students that have mono, strep and other illness that are out often. They also are out for the normal colds and stomach flus. A lot of times their immune system is low and they are attacked by another illness. In those cases students do not always go to the doctor. I have to admit there have been times I have even thought, my goodness this child is out a lot. How in this world can the student pass when they are never in class. I have a werid opinion on attendance. I do not want a student at school if they are going to be too sick to learn anything in the class room. However, I also think there is a time that one must suck it up and go on with normal life. I think we have to teach our children that you cannot stay out of school for every single thing. Unfortunately due to certain rules students are having to go to the doctor for something they would not normally go for just to have that note. Seeing people sick and watching the length of these illness is making me agree that the normal cold is no longer a 5-7 day illness. Our viruses are mutating and becoming worse. The normal cold is more like 10-12 days now.

Please do not think I am saying your child should suck it up and go. I am not saying that at all. Only you know what is right for your child.

 

[ReneeA]

What about those parents laid off with no insurance right now? They cannot afford to go to a doctor and pay the $200 for an office visit all to be told, "It's a cold - they'll feel better in a couple days."

I am not running my kid with a low grade fever, common cold, or 24 hour bug to the doctor - ever.

 

[yeartolate]

IMO here's the key. If the child is doing passing work what is the problem? If they are failing then there should be concern.

A lot of this is driven by school funding by the state. Schools are given money based on a daily head count. I remember when I was in school a student was doing "A" work. She had missed two weeks due to illness and had her grade lowered because of it. She was still doing "A" work.

Grades should be given according to work done !!!

Idle curiosity, as an adult, if you got your work done....and then just didn't show up for the the other days....what would happen?

 

[yeartolate]

Oh let me add this.

I see students that have mono, strep and other illness that are out often. They also are out for the normal colds and stomach flus. A lot of times their immune system is low and they are attacked by another illness. In those cases students do not always go to the doctor. I have to admit there have been times I have even thought, my goodness this child is out a lot. How in this world can the student pass when they are never in class. I have a werid opinion on attendance. I do not want a student at school if they are going to be too sick to learn anything in the class room. However, I also think there is a time that one must suck it up and go on with normal life. I think we have to teach our children that you cannot stay out of school for every single thing. Unfortunately due to certain rules students are having to go to the doctor for something they would not normally go for just to have that note. Seeing people sick and watching the length of these illness is making me agree that the normal cold is no longer a 5-7 day illness. Our viruses are mutating and becoming worse. The normal cold is more like 10-12 days now.

Please do not think I am saying your child should suck it up and go. I am not saying that at all. Only you know what is right for your child.

I do not know if the viruses are getting any worse, but frankly I think there may be some factors that can be adjusted. Here are a few thoughts.

Is your kid overextended? Does he have to "fit in" homework into his schedule on a regular basis?

Does he eat regular meals which include fresh fruit and veggies? Plenty of water? Vitamins are usually not needed if the diet is balanced.

Is the kid stressed in general? Why?

Has this kid lived in a "sterile" enviroment? I would encourage you all to do a little research on the antibacterial craze....I am not saying to keep your house filthy, but to all but sterilze the kid's home enviroment makes it almost impossible to naturally build up immunity. Kids are being Purell-ed to the point of ending up in ER with alcohol poisoning! On some level kids need to learn to live with their bacteria and viruses - their immune system depends on it.

 

[Jsme]

What about those parents laid off with no insurance right now? They cannot afford to go to a doctor and pay the $200 for an office visit all to be told, "It's a cold - they'll feel better in a couple days."

I am not running my kid with a low grade fever, common cold, or 24 hour bug to the doctor - ever.

If this is the case I think that parent should go to their AP and tell them what is going on. Remember there is always room for overrides. I always send parents to the AP's when I want to excuse something but do not have the power to do so.

 

[Jsme]

I also hate the threatening letters I have gotten twice from the school informing me ds has missed 6 days, what the NC statute is for truancy etc. and how DSS could get involved. Seems like a waste of DSS time when they have other bigger and pressing problems.

So, yeah its the rule, I follow it but really I don't like it much! Feel like parents aren't stupid and the reason we are having so many problems with attendance is because WE are sending the kids in because we have no choices but let the school send them home!

Kelly

Kelly, you live in my state. I am unsure if you have read my replies but I work in a High School and I am the attendance secretary. Those horrible letters are not written my your school. They are written by Central Office and approved by their lawyers. They have to sound strict due to truacy laws in NC. Imagine being on my end of those letters. I do not write them, I do not figure out who gets them, I do not print them and I do not see them until someone calls me ticked off. Those letters are form letters designed to be used from K-12. I personally do not like them any better than you do. My Principal has had many complaints due to them and he came to me questioning and wanting to read one. I had to explain to him I had nothing to do with the writing of those letters and they are done at Central Office and approved my lawyers. Every single form letter in my district is approved my our school lawyers. I would think every school system in NC do the same thing.

 

[starwood]

We have to give a doctors note if your out for 2 days which is ridiculous. If you're sick you're usually sick for at least 2 days. So I have to make a doctors appointment and go in for him to say it's viral and just rest and have liquids.

 

[dairyou]

IMO here's the key. If the child is doing passing work what is the problem? If they are failing then there should be concern.

A lot of this is driven by school funding by the state. Schools are given money based on a daily head count. I remember when I was in school a student was doing "A" work. She had missed two weeks due to illness and had her grade lowered because of it. She was still doing "A" work.

Grades should be given according to work done !!![/QUOTE]

Yeah, and not how many boxes of tissues you bring in! My son gets a better grade if he brings in tissue boxes. Ugh.

 

[Jsme]

IMO here's the key. If the child is doing passing work what is the problem? If they are failing then there should be concern.

A lot of this is driven by school funding by the state. Schools are given money based on a daily head count. I remember when I was in school a student was doing "A" work. She had missed two weeks due to illness and had her grade lowered because of it. She was still doing "A" work.

Grades should be given according to work done !!![/QUOTE]

Yeah, and not how many boxes of tissues you bring in! My son gets a better grade if he brings in tissue boxes. Ugh.

This is really a very sore subject at most schools. The general concept is that most students that are out 10 or more days can not possibliy pass that 9 weeks. Remember 10 days is 2 weeks out of 9weeks. However, students are allowed time to make up work giving them the chance to still have a passing grade for the 9 weeks. So when thought of it that way it does not seem quite fair then to fail a student that is passing. I really do not think there are any good answers because each and every "rule" has to be set up for the general population and if they bend them for one then they have to bend them for the bad apples too. This is the bain of my job. I really love my job but there are times it is hard to say I can not excuse your absence.

I have not put this in any of my posts yet. I do ask for doctor's notes when I see a student come in to sign out and put appointment as her excuse. Then in an hour she/he comes back with new nails or a new hair cut. Plus due to policy I have to ask for doctor's note if a student is often signing out for "appointments". We have a huge problem with students signing out the same time on the same day each week. When we see this trend we question. Yes, sometimes it is due to the laws that the State sets.

As far as the State funding per head. Yes every school does receive state funding for students. I can say quite honestly, this is not the reason for the attendance policy in my school. We actually drop our students that are 16 or older as soon as they are out 10 days consecutively. If they are under 16 by law we are not allowed to drop them.

IMHO there is really no right or wrong. I have only been posting to maybe help explain the whys. Sometimes I do not even agree with what I have to do but our attendance policy is based on State Law. I would think most states base their policies on the same.