Scandal in the fourth grade! UPDATE post 28

[janey99]

DS came home from school yesterday nearly distraught -

His classroom has a signout sheet by the door, and kids who go to the bathroom or otherwise leave the room are supposed to use it. Apparently, the teacher discovered that some time in the last several days since last Thursday, someone wrote two filthy words on the sheet!

She asked the perp to some forward but no one did. She collected all their writing journals to try to match the handwriting, but could only narrow it down to a small handful of kids, not one. Yesterday she told them if the evildoer doesn't come forward, she will cancel the class Halloween party that is scheduled for today.

DS and a bunch of kids feel they know who did it, based on prior bad acts and this boy's demeanor during the kerfuffle (and he is in the handful of suspects). He finds it hard to believe that the teacher has not made these connections as well. Of course, none of them want to narc because the kid has a history of being a bully and stealing things out of desks, and no one wants to be targeted.

Poor DS went off to school this morning with no idea whether there is going to be a party or not, and really angry that the teacher (his opinion) will not just use common sense, realize who did it, and punish only that kid.

I have no recollection of such high drama when I was in fourth grade! Anybody else?

Jane

 

[alldiz]

Wow....what a shame....

If the boy won't admit it, she's in a bind.

When I was in 1st grade this boy stabbed the teacher in the hand
with a pencil.....It stuck out of her hand

Needless to say he left school for a while....
He came back to my class in 4th grade.....he must have been on meds
because he wasn't "bad" anymore....We were all nervous at 1st though
Kerri

 

[palmtreegirl]

When I was in 1st grade this boy stabbed the teacher in the hand
with a pencil.....It stuck out of her hand

When I was in 3rd grade the exact same thing happened in my class. I still remember that pencil sticking out of Sister Mary Ellen's hand.

 

[Master Gracy]

a boy in my class used to crawl under the tables and bite peoples legs

 

[Maleficent13]

Oh, yes. 4th grade was when the drama all started IIRC.

 

[MushyMushy]

I remember being in 3rd grade somebody did something bad and the whole class lost their end of year picnic because nobody came forward. I don't remember what it was that happened, but I do remember most of the boys tying to convince the poor class scapegoat to admit to it. We thought she was such a hateful teacher and we still talk about it 30+ years later.

 

[golfgal]

DS came home from school yesterday nearly distraught -

His classroom has a signout sheet by the door, and kids who go to the bathroom or otherwise leave the room are supposed to use it. Apparently, the teacher discovered that some time in the last several days since last Thursday, someone wrote two filthy words on the sheet!

She asked the perp to some forward but no one did. She collected all their writing journals to try to match the handwriting, but could only narrow it down to a small handful of kids, not one. Yesterday she told them if the evildoer doesn't come forward, she will cancel the class Halloween party that is scheduled for today.

DS and a bunch of kids feel they know who did it, based on prior bad acts and this boy's demeanor during the kerfuffle (and he is in the handful of suspects). He finds it hard to believe that the teacher has not made these connections as well. Of course, none of them want to narc because the kid has a history of being a bully and stealing things out of desks, and no one wants to be targeted.

Poor DS went off to school this morning with no idea whether there is going to be a party or not, and really angry that the teacher (his opinion) will not just use common sense, realize who did it, and punish only that kid.

I have no recollection of such high drama when I was in fourth grade! Anybody else?

Jane

Chances are that he did do it but what if he didn't? What if one of the other kids wrote them and made them to look like the other kid did that. Just because the kid is a trouble maker doesn't mean he always does everything and at that age it isn't out of the question that someone is trying to get him into trouble. I think the teacher is doing the right thing.

 

[Pooh_Friend#1]

How do you know that the boy was in in the handful of suspects? Did she tell the names of all the suspects?

 

[Serena]

Um, yeah, forth grade. Had some drama, I was involved in it. Long story short, we all got paddled.

I hope they do have the party. I hate when a teacher punishes a class for the actions of one kid. I understand it somewhat now, but I still hate it.

 

[TinkerbellMama]

DS came home from school yesterday nearly distraught -

His classroom has a signout sheet by the door, and kids who go to the bathroom or otherwise leave the room are supposed to use it. Apparently, the teacher discovered that some time in the last several days since last Thursday, someone wrote two filthy words on the sheet!

She asked the perp to some forward but no one did. She collected all their writing journals to try to match the handwriting, but could only narrow it down to a small handful of kids, not one. Yesterday she told them if the evildoer doesn't come forward, she will cancel the class Halloween party that is scheduled for today.

DS and a bunch of kids feel they know who did it, based on prior bad acts and this boy's demeanor during the kerfuffle (and he is in the handful of suspects). He finds it hard to believe that the teacher has not made these connections as well. Of course, none of them want to narc because the kid has a history of being a bully and stealing things out of desks, and no one wants to be targeted.

Poor DS went off to school this morning with no idea whether there is going to be a party or not, and really angry that the teacher (his opinion) will not just use common sense, realize who did it, and punish only that kid.

I have no recollection of such high drama when I was in fourth grade! Anybody else?

Jane

That's pathetic. Canceling the celebration of a holiday for the actions of one kid she is too lazy to ferret out? As a parent, I'd be plenty ticked. But never fear, teachers who would flame me for this position...my child won't be in your classroom. Ever. For sure. Amen.

OP, I hope the teacher figures it out quick, or goes back on her word and lets them have the party, anyway. I'll be crossing my fingers for your son and his classmates!

P.S. As always, I don't think punishment is the way to deal with this wrongdoer, even if he is caught. Just couldn't let my record be unbroken! (And you can take that two ways, lol!)

 

[janey99]

How do you know that the boy was in in the handful of suspects? Did she tell the names of all the suspects?

I got the feeling that the suspects were pretty open in telling their friends she had talked to them. That afternoon (yesterday) she told everyone to stop talking about it or they'd get in trouble for that too.

 

[Janet Hill]

Your son and many of the children think they know who did it, but they don't know for sure. The teacher probably suspects this child as well. Since no one knows for sure nothing can be done to just him. If the teacher decides to punish this child based on what everyone thinks she could get into lots of hot water.

She's trying to guilt the guilty into a confession. Remember (as a former class troublemaker, I speak from experience), it's not always the prime troublemaker each time. Lots of kids know who will be accused and feel they can get away with more.

 

[Pooh_Friend#1]

wow, I really hope he can have his party.

 

[yasmina]

I learned a great way to ferret out the truth from a classroom of students years ago. I was absent from class one day. The students in one class were especially bad for the substitute (remember when you were a kid and your mom told you to wear clean underwear, in case you were in an accident? That's how I feel when I have a sub. The students' behavior reflects on me as a teacher)

Anyway, during this one class period in particular, the kids threw spitballs all over the room. They were stuck on the walls, desks, everywhere. Of course, no one wanted to be the narc, so I called the office. The assistant principal (now a superintendent in another district) came up to my room, passed out paper, and told the kids each to write down who in the class was responsible. We nailed the perps!

I've used this techniques a number of times since then in my classes, on field trips, and even at home with my own kids.

 

[phamton]

(Former/retired teacher here) It's just a couple of dirty words not a bomb threat. If I were the teacher, I would have simply voiced my displeasure and either erased the words or just printed off another sign-out sheet.

 

[shortbun]

Sorry, 4th graders experiment with bad words. They are children and curious. A teacher who would punish a whole class because of one word written somewhere is an over reactor. She needs a vacation, that's obvious. I could understand keeping the group of suspect in from recess or having the whole class write a paragraph about graffiti being vandalism but cancelling the whole class' party when parents have worked hard to organize it and children all over the building will be partying-stupid. Sorry your son has such an uptight teacher.

 

[Disney Doll]

I see no problem with the way she is handling it.
She can't accuse the kid without having witnessed him writing it. What if he didn't do it? Is it fair for him to be accused because he is usually the "troublemaker"???

Quite frankly, if he is a bully and the rest of the class ignores him or gangs up on him in that way that kids are inclined to do, my guess is that he may shape up a bit.

When I was in 5th grade we had a kid like this. Always doing stuff and when he wouldn't own up to it, the whole class got in trouble, lost priveleges etc. He was soemwhat of a bully, "in your face" type of kid...now he'd probably be diagnosed ADHD and be controlled with medication, but that didn't happen in the 70's.

Anyhow, the kid eventually got himself ostracized. He would come up to play with a group, and they'd ignore him ands walk away. He try to bully someone, and literally everyone else in the class would go after him. He became the class pariah, the bullied one...he had happen to him exactly what he had always done to other people. Eventually, he got the hint and started to behave himself.

Peer pressure, when properly applied, does work. As long as the parents don't get in the way.

 

[MamaLema]

I can't stand when a whole class is punished because of one person

 

[KAMLEM]

I can't stand when a whole class is punished because of one person

I agree. My daughter's 8th grade class was in an assembly 2 weeks ago and some kids were talking. As a result, the teachers made all kids write the constitution during their study periods for an entire week. I was angry, but my DD threatened me not to call the school because it would embarrass her. Hey, if she wants to spend 5 hours writing the constitution then she can go ahead and do that!

 

[mirthmaiden]

(Former/retired teacher here) It's just a couple of dirty words not a bomb threat. If I were the teacher, I would have simply voiced my displeasure and either erased the words or just printed off another sign-out sheet.

I agree. The teacher is reinforcing the negative behavior by giving so much attention to it. This is exactly why kids use "dirty" words - to see how much reaction it gets.