RSVP - how to calculate for people who dont respond?

Pugsly

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Mar 8, 2002
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DS graduated from college in August and we are throwing a party for him. Invitations went out over the last week. I requested a RSVP via phone, text, or email.

So far, we only have a few responses. And DS is convinced most of his friends will show, but won't RSVP. Admittedly, I think I made a mistake by not asking for a response by a certain date, but there was a limited amount of space on the invite.

DH is concerned about buying too much food and drink, having a lot left over, etc.

Would you outreach those you haven't heard from?

What's the best way to estimate the number of guests?
 
When is the party? If the invitations just went out I wouldn't reach out just yet-I think some people tend to wait until closer to the party to respond. As it gets closer if your son's friends are the ones that haven't RSVP'd, maybe he can send a group text or facebook message just saying he needs to get a count.
Enjoy the party!
 
DS graduated from college in August and we are throwing a party for him. Invitations went out over the last week. I requested a RSVP via phone, text, or email.

So far, we only have a few responses. And DS is convinced most of his friends will show, but won't RSVP. Admittedly, I think I made a mistake by not asking for a response by a certain date, but there was a limited amount of space on the invite.

DH is concerned about buying too much food and drink, having a lot left over, etc.

Would you outreach those you haven't heard from?

What's the best way to estimate the number of guests?

Reach out 7-10 days before the party.
 
Thanks, Allison. The party is the 21st. Invites went out on the 3rd and 9th. I thought maybe I'd have more responses by now, from those sent out on the 3rd. But ill just bide my time and start panicking the day before the party ;). The group text is a great idea. Again, thanks.
 

As a survivor of a high school graduation party this summer (and as someone who went to tons of others), all my sympathies go out to you. None of us party givers got rsvps back properly, and all had way way way too much food. DS's friends did NOT want to make a commitment to coming or not, or, if they did come, had maybe been to other parties that day and weren't hungry. I was petrified of running out though, so just resigned myself to having tons of leftovers. I froze all the meats, took all the desserts to work, and gave the vegs/starches (that we couldn't finish in a week) to my outside critters. I also brought tons of gladware throwaway containers to the party and sent as much food home with people as I could.

RSVP seems to be a thing of the past, unfortunately...

Terri
 
Sorry to say it but people just don't RSVP anymore. I always went by the rule of thumb that 10-15% never show so just estimate based on that. Good luck and Congrats to the grad :-)
 
Thanks, Allison. The party is the 21st. Invites went out on the 3rd and 9th. I thought maybe I'd have more responses by now, from those sent out on the 3rd. But ill just bide my time and start panicking the day before the party ;). The group text is a great idea. Again, thanks.

I'd reach out this Sunday. That's close enough to the event that they should have a sense of what they're doing for the weekend, and far enough away that you'll have plenty of time for shopping. I've made the mistake of sending invites without a date before, and people RSVPed literally 45 minutes before the event. I suppose, technically, they did respond, but it wasn't entirely useful...
 
please respond by xx/xx/xxxx or don't come.

like my wife says "you're certainly direct"

And no. I'm not concerned about hurt feelings. If they can't be considerate to me I can't to them.
 
please respond by xx/xx/xxxx or don't come.

like my wife says "you're certainly direct"

And no. I'm not concerned about hurt feelings. If they can't be considerate to me I can't to them.

+1. Just don't let them in.
 
DS graduated from college in August and we are throwing a party for him. Invitations went out over the last week. I requested a RSVP via phone, text, or email.

So far, we only have a few responses. And DS is convinced most of his friends will show, but won't RSVP. Admittedly, I think I made a mistake by not asking for a response by a certain date, but there was a limited amount of space on the invite.

DH is concerned about buying too much food and drink, having a lot left over, etc.

Would you outreach those you haven't heard from?

What's the best way to estimate the number of guests?

Have DS call his friends and ask. That's the only way you'll know for sure. I would definitely call everyone, but probably not until about a week before the party.
 
please respond by xx/xx/xxxx or don't come.

like my wife says "you're certainly direct"

And no. I'm not concerned about hurt feelings. If they can't be considerate to me I can't to them.
+1. Just don't let them in.
I could never do that, send out an invitation like that. Also, to not let them in? A friend of your kid? Easier said than done. Lol.

Have DS call his friends and ask. That's the only way you'll know for sure. I would definitely call everyone, but probably not until about a week before the party.

I agree with you on this. Thats what I would do as well, get my son to ask his buddies. Thats how most of them rsvp nowadays anyway.
 
OP here. First off, thanks for your responses.

What's seemingly worse (at least for me) is that my close friends, who have known DS his whole life and are invited, have not RSVP'd either. Guess I'll be making calls this weekend too. :-)
 
DS graduated from college in August and we are throwing a party for him. Invitations went out over the last week. I requested a RSVP via phone, text, or email.

So far, we only have a few responses. And DS is convinced most of his friends will show, but won't RSVP. Admittedly, I think I made a mistake by not asking for a response by a certain date, but there was a limited amount of space on the invite.

DH is concerned about buying too much food and drink, having a lot left over, etc.

Would you outreach those you haven't heard from?

What's the best way to estimate the number of guests?

I would have your DS text his friends.
 
I think 11 days before an event is too soon to be mad about a lack of RSVP's, especially if they only got the invitation two days earlier. Unless it's a huge event like a wedding, I'm not RSVPing until at least a week beforehand. And it's not like I'm waiting to see if something better comes along. Usually, the things that pop up that prevent me from attending a party are things that aren't even as fun, like a soccer tournament, or last minute dinner invite to the IL's.

I always RSVP, and I always give a RSVP date on invitations. However, that date is usually 3 or 4 days before the party. As for the friends, I've never had dd17 or ds15's friends RSVP to me - they just let my kids know. If you really need to know this far in advance, have your ds text his friends.
 












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