Reviews You can't use! Review #15, The Angry Rude Planet!

[nebo]

Review 8, Invading Germany, or, Blind in Berlin

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Ok, for today's Review You Can't Use, we are fueling up the Delorean to go back to February of '09.
(somebody cue up the wavy dream sequence transition)

Today, we are meeting a DIS family we met here on the boards,
the Winkers clan, perhaps you've heard of her. She and I have traded barbs on each other's trip reports for a couple years now.
Reservations were for 12:30, we would have gotten there a little early like we wanted to, but got caughty up watching the dumb mime, (Sergio?) over in Italy.
Even though Italy isn't that far from Germany, you had to take the detour through China to get there so we barely made it on time.

At 12:30 we were at the Biergarten podium, and like I said, probably should have gotten there a little earlier, but we saw no sign of the Winkers clan.
Now, this is easy to do when you have no idea what a Winkers clan looks like.

But we thought we'd be able to figure it out, so we just hung around a bit, then checked in and hung around a bit more.

After about 15 minutes, Diane thought maybe they can tell us at the podium if they are already here.

DOH!

Never occurred to me.

So I went up and asked if the Winkers Clan had already checked in.

"Is Clan with a "C" or a "K"?"

"A "C", I believe."

"Oh yes, here it is, "Winkers Clan", they were probably seated about 20 minutes ago."

Crap. We asked if we could be put at their table but nooooo, you snooze, you lose. But she did seat us nearby.

Now, the rest of this story, even though the whole thing is written in first person perspective, is now going to be REALLY first person perspective.
Meaning, some of it may not be entirely accurate, but it's from what I could see, which was mostly non-existant.

Germany and Le Cellier come in two and three on the
Disney "no lighting" special effects list.
Number one is still San Angel Inn, I've lit the tablecloth on fire just to read the menu there.

As we were led to the table, I knew I was dead meat. After being in the sun, I couldn't see a durn thing in there. I was lucky to grab a hold of one of Smidgy's belt loops with my finger and just lugged along behind her. Once seated I let out a big "whew", safe!

Man, is it dark in here!
There was an older couple sitting acroos from us, and as we were taking off our jackets the woman said how nice it was to share a table with strangers, what a great way to meet new friends, hear new thoughts, yada, yada, yada.
I had a feeling we were going to prove to be a big disappointment to this woman for a few reasons;
it's a buffet, we're getting up and leaving a lot, we hope to still find Winkers family, and also, I really don't like meeting new people and talking when I'm eating, I didn't really want to have our meeting with Winkers during a meal either.

I much prefer a meeting at a resort pool with a manhattan in my hand, not a chicken leg or something like that.

Great.

We introduced ourselves, and that was about the last time we spoke to this wonderful, friendly, affectionate couple for the rest of our livesl.

I think Cherie recognized us and started waving. Diane saw her and told me "There they are" and got up to say hi.

"Aren't you coming?"

"You didn't leave me a belt loop."

I followed her to their table, and we kinda met then.
Kinda for me, all I saw was ghostly apparitions, shadows. Coulda been Moanin Myrtle, the Baron and Nearly Headless Nick for all I could tell.

Without faces, names go in one ear and out the other for me. I think the names I got out of the Winkers Clan at that time were, Cherie, D-Jay, her husband, Evan, Ethan, Bailey, Cherie's MIL, Doc, Sneezy and James the Younger.
There was a lot of them, I know that. Brazillian Tour Groups would turn around a go the other way.

Since Cherie does all the talking and trip report writing, MIL is D-Jay's mom.
And even from reading her report, I think MIL is her real name. Must be short for Millie.

Then it was time for me to have to actually obtain some food, and I was starving! At least the serving tables were well lit, I grabbed a a few things to begin with, a bowl of potato leek soup was one of them. As I was trying to figure out what exactly is what, a young guy was behind me, talking to me and really being helpful about naming the mystery items and telling me what's good or not.
What I didn't know at the time was that this was someone I had just met but couldn't see, Evan I believe.
Or Nearly Headless Nick. Then I was done and had to find my own table again.

And I lost Diane.
"Has anybody seen a belt loop around here?"


Now, how to get this back to the table without spilling with all the stupid stairs and steps they had to incorporate in the interior design. I'm assuming the stairs are only there to give the custodians something to do, like clean up messes people like me make stumbling.
Two stairs here, two stairs there, they served no purpose except to make me trip, and I don't need stairs to do that.

I made it, somehow, again with a sigh of relief, and, to make sure I was at the right table, I reached my hand across the table to feel the strange woman's face who wanted to talk.

I was.

then I went to work on what I had come back with to start the meal off. This did not go well right from the beginning.
After a few attempts, I realized I was trying to butter my bread with a dumpling. At the counter, Evan had pointed out these round yellow balls in a bowl and told me they were butter. Then, further down the line, there was another bowl with round yellow balls in it, and I said, "Oh, more butter?"
"Nope, those are dumplings."

I knew I should have just left them, I don't even like dumplings, but two ended up on my plate and infiltrated the butter.
After one of them shot off my plate from me trying to "spread" it on my bread with my knife, (no, I never did see where it landed, could have been on the woman's lap for all I know), I gave up and went to work on my soup.

And it didn't work, either.

Even though I couldn't see it, I could tell by the weight that I wasn't getting anything in my spoon. I'd scoop it up, but it was like it was just falling right off.
No wonder they call it leak soup!

Finally, I felt with my other hand to see if I've got it right side up.

Oh, I did, that wasn't the problem.
Problem was I was using a fork!

After initially ignoring our new table friends to go and say hi to the "Strange people" at the other table, I think it was right about this time that our new "table friends" gave up on us.

Or at least, me, after watching me try to eat soup with a fork and butter my bread with a dumpling.

I'm sorry, they made the butter pats in the same shape as little balls, just like the dumplings! What happened to the little square "pats" of butter you had to peel the wax paper off of?

In the meantime, Diane is still waiting for a phone call and for a change, even has her cell phone with her. The first part of our trip was incredibly cold and we hoped to be able to rent some more points from our friends and stretch the stay out, if possible.

One more trip up to the food and back, and our new bestest of table friends tried one more time to get to know us, one last time. This time it was the husband who asked us what other table service restaurants we really like in Disney, and,,,,,

Then the Winkers Clan stopped by on their way out.
As we were all talking, I finally could see some of them, that was nice being able to put heads on headless people.

Then Diane's cell phone rang.

That did it for our table companions, the last straw if you will.

Our new bestest of table friends from wherever got up and left,
mumbling something about "friendlier at Gatorland".
I did feel kind of guilty the way we ended up treating them, and remembered his last question and I yelled out "Le Cellier" after them, but I'm pretty sure they couldn't give a damn by then.

Smidgy went and took the call, then came back. Now, everyone is kind of talking at once, mostly from behind me, and I just kept on eating.


Either Winkers had told her MIL about my foot trouble before, or she saw the look on my face when Diane told about my new mishap at Stitches Escape, but Millie asked me how my foot is holding up. I told her not too bad with the help of painkillers.

"Yeah? My whole body hurts after all they have put me through. What'ya got?"

"Vikes". I told her, then,
"Need some?"

"Not yet, I'll let you know."


I told her fine, if it get's too bad give us a call and we can meet by the corn dog stand at the Boardwalk. Just ask for Sharkbait.

Winkers told me later on that she would have probably taken me up on my offer if I pushed a bit more, but I didn't have any with me anyway, what I had left was back in the room. (no, I don't go around handing out drugs to strange little old ladies)



Cherie and D-Jay have a great family, wish we didn't have 2500 miles separating us. Once again, I, we, have met people on the Dis that we are proud to be able to call friends.

As for the food here, there's plenty for even a finnicky eater, and everybody likes the basics, a couple of different types of sausage and of course, wiener schnitzel, who doesn't like that?

If you're not familiar with it, you got your basic wiener,, and schnitzel is a grade of cut of wiener. You have your Wiener New York Strip, and your Wiener Fillet , your Wiener Porterhouse , T-bone, Delmonico,,,,,,,,your Wiener Skirt, Wiener Cube and finally, your Wiener Schnitzel . This is approximately in the same category as "Parts is Parts" or Mcnuggets.

Even though I am 100 percent German descent, I am a lousy Kraut, in that there's a lot of German food I don't really care for at all, for example, I don't eat sauerkraut, but I always find plenty here to eat.

There are also lots of dessert type offerings of different cakes and Kugah, as my gram would say. They even had German chocolate cake,,,,, go figure.

By the way, the Biergarten is one of the cheaper sit down meals you can get at DisneyWorld. It is also worth every penny of it.
Also, it's cheaper for lunch, and they really only add a couple of menu items for dinner, for example, the wiener schnitzel now beomes Rohm Schnitzel, which is Wiener Schnitzel with gunk on it.

There is entertainment in the form of weird horns and jug blowing and xylophones and guys dressed in weird outfits that show you why they lost the war, and children participating down in the middle of the floor, but today there was no time to really watch any of it.

We both give it two thumbs up, and I still wonder whatever happened to my runaway dumpling. goodnight
__________________

 

[smidgy]

so funny. reading about it again, reliving it, makes me laugh.. even guffaw!!!

the only thing is.. guys, now they have upped the price, same as at all the buffets.. made them crazy expensive. you wouldn't know it to look at us, but as you get older youcan't eat as much in one sitting anymore. still a great deal for a TS credit (after all, you get appetizers at a buffet, not so at other restaurants anymore) and lots of desserts. but not as good OOP anymore. sigh...

now I know why all my belt loops are ripped out!!

 

[Stacybaeasm]

I can't believe it took me so long to find this. I LOVE, LOVE, me some Nebo writing (and Smidgy commenting). I remember most of these from your trip reports but I've got to say, I love rereading them and laughing. Keep it up!

 

[nebo]

I can't believe it took me so long to find this. I LOVE, LOVE, me some Nebo writing (and Smidgy commenting). I remember most of these from your trip reports but I've got to say, I love rereading them and laughing. Keep it up!

Hello Stacy, I do remember you, you go all the way back to when I was young and inexperienced in the ways of the Dis, not the serious minded individual that has matured right in front of you. Nice to see you again.

Well, response wise, Biergarten has bombed, so we are probably going to get as far away from Germany as possible in the next review, as we head on into the pyramid for a late meal at the San Angel Inn, Mexico, U. S. A.

 

[laura74]

Uh oh. San Angel next? That's even darker than Biergarten! I can only imagine the trouble you'll get into!

I really felt for you on that bus ride. I have such a fear of having a um gastronomical emergency somewhere like that.

 

[nebo]

Uh oh. San Angel next? That's even darker than Biergarten! I can only imagine the trouble you'll get into!

.

Laura, you are absolutely correct about it being darker in San Angel, even Smidgy can't see in there!

I should get that one up by around 7 o'clock tonight, Central time, if I remember right, this one will be fun!

 

[Backstage_Gal]

Well, I just cant this chapter go now without posting, can I?

In defense of schnitzel at dinner, its not Rohm schnitzel, it's Rahm schnitzel, meaning it's covered in cream sauce and the gunk is most likely mushrooms.

I will now give you and all your dear readers the perfect recipe for a suicide. But you will die happy, I guarantee it, meat is fork tender and the entire dish is to die for:

HEART ATTACK ON A PLATEUEBERBACKENE SCHNITZEL
INGREDIENTS:Schnitzel (6 for this recipe) - make per schnitzel recipeBitmap 1 8 oz. container sour cream1 8 oz. container sweet cream1 round of Gouda cheese, grated1 medium chopped onionSalt pork, about 6-8 slices chopped into small cubes1 or 2 cans mushroomsMeasures are approximate, adjust to tasteDIRECTIONS:In frying pan, cook salt pork and add onions till brownAdd mushrooms when doneJust before ready to bake, add sweet and sour creamPlace cooked schnitzel on cookie sheetPour salt pork - onion - mushroom - cream mixture on topTop with plenty of grated Gouda cheeseCover with Aluminum foilBake at 375 for 45 minutesServe with fresh French BreadThis recipe can be made ahead of time for a party, finish sauce and bake when ready

WOW, what happened to all my nice tabular formatting?

 

[Backstage_Gal]

I guess you would need the schnitzel recipe too, so, as bad as the formatting is, here it is, in case anyone is moved to try it:

SCHNITZELINGREDIENTS:Boneless if possible pork chopsSalt and pepper, onion powder if desiredEggsBread crumbsMargarineDIRECTIONS:Season meat with salt and pepper, onion powder if desiredBeat 1 or 2 eggs on a plate with a forkPour breadcrumbs onto parch paperRoll meat first in egg, then in bread crumbsHeat 1 stick margarine in large frying pan on high heatAdd meat and reduce heat to mediumTurn when brown on first sideCook about 10 mins, cut the middle to check for doneness

 

[smidgy]

marita.. isn't Weinerschnitzel veal?

 

[Backstage_Gal]

Not necessarily, it's usually pork, can be either

If it's vel, it would state "kalbs schnitzel", if it doesnt say that, it's pork

PS: that recipe is really delicious

 

[nebo]

Smidgy asked,,, "Marita, isn't Wienerschnitzel usually veal?"

Not necessarily, it's usually pork, can be either

If it's vel, it would state "kalbs schnitzel", if it doesnt say that, it's pork

PS: that recipe is really delicious

hey, how about that,, all my joking around with different cuts and what they mean weren't all that far off,,,, and i would be proud to be the owner of a plate of
what I'm sure I would love,,,, "Salsbury Schnitzel"!

Ok,,,, new review,,, coming up in a bit,,,,, oh,,,,
and I was close with the "Rahm" part, I thought I was confusing that with the name of our new mayor in Chicago, who is NOT named Daily.

back soon

 

[Backstage_Gal]

hey, how about that,, all my joking around with different cuts and what they mean weren't all that far off,,,, and i would be proud to be the owner of a plate of
what I'm sure I would love,,,, "Salsbury Schnitzel"!

Sacrilege
​

 

[nebo]

Today/tonight, we are traveling all the way back to September of '06, we were on the Free Dining Plan and totally felt like we were living WAY beyond our means.
The Free Dining Plan back then also included an appetizer for both of us, it also included the tip, that is how you were then encouraged to try places you may not normally try,,,,

Like The San Angel Inn.

Which, no way, would I have paid those prices for Mexican food out of pocket.

I mean, the money comes out of pocket, not the food.

But it didn't this trip, it was free dining, so the money didn't come out of pocket either,,,, I mean,,, ok, I'll shut up now.

What you are also about to read is one of my first offerings at doing a dining review,, I was new to the trip reports,,,, and, well,,,, see for yourself.

_______________________________________________


This next chapter is probably going to come at you in bit's and pieces.
Cuz I just lost an hour by somehow hitting the magical " make everything go away " key. Yeah, and it might now have an edge to it. (Yes, it happened to me a lot back then,, and it STILL happens to me, but what's coming up next is after I lost a good hour and a half of work typing this chapter, and I wasn't really in the mood for being funny anymore.)

WE ATE AT THE FRIGGIN MEXICO RESTARAUNT AND WENT BACK TO THE ROOM.


We get off the boat ride, and go check in at the register for dinner. The place is really empty.

We had no idea what we were going to get tonight, and I'm not talking about the food.

Our reservation is for 9:45, and boy, was it hard to book!
The restaurant is listed as being open until 10 tonight, since it is an Extra Magic Hours evening.
To us, this seemed just perfect,,,, our favorite viewing area for Illuminations is on the bridge next to Mexico, so after the fireworks we can just go against the grain and go do the boat ride in Norway, "Nordstrom's" , and then walk back and do the boat ride in the pyramid, "It's a Small Mexican World" and it will then be time for dinner.

Perfect!

The problem was making the reservation.

I tried 4 times,,, and this is 4 months in advance,,, I know they are not all booked up here, this isn't Ohana or Le Cellier, but they keep saying that,," Sorry sir, it's not showing any openings."

I finally thought about it for a bit,,,, the resaurant is usually closed at this time,,,,hmmm,,,

I called back and I got the same thing, no nuttin for you,,,
then I asked her to do something that will punch in the fact that on this day it is EMH night,,,,, I heard a vague,,, "OHHHHH," and what do you know,,,,9:45 it is!

I'm not sure, but I'm guessing that in the past they never addressed this issue in the reservation system, because they didn't realize there was an issue.
Same day guests probably still filled up those slots in the end so it wouldn't show up that way.

Anyway, that's the way I figured it worked out in my mind, it will still be busy, just not terribly so, I gave myself another mental high five.

The extra benefit was that since it's been dark out for a long time now, my rotten eyes should have a fighting chance to see in side her for a little bit, anyway.

I underestimated the difference between dark and "Major League" dark.

Biergarten is dark.
Mammoth Cave with the lights off is dark.
My bathroom when I miss the light switch in a hurry at 3 in the morning is dark.

Amateurs!
Tonight we are playing the Carnegie Hall of Dark!

I clung to Smidgy's hand on the way to the rectum.

I mean rectorum. I mean podium, pedestal, pulpit, register whatever that tall, wooden thing the woman hides behind with the little tiny light on the top so she can pretend she is actually able to see the list of reservations she has scrawled on it. I leaned over and saw there was also a small computer type screen barely lit up, I figured this would be a spreadsheet of the ADR's that were phoned in ahead of time,, but after a peek I'm thinking we are going to be eating with Inky, Binky, and whatever the other little guys from Pac Man are named, cuz that'w what it looked like I saw on that screen.

"Hi, we're here for our nine,,,,,
"Yes, yes, come this way please."
Diane turns to me and gives me that, " hey, can't get any better than this" look, I'm not so sure.

Something about it all just doesn't seem right.

Now, by now you should all know about my incredible visual acuity exploits.
My eyes are just amazing!

I can see dark, where no one else can. (I think they're just not trying)

So, on our way to the table, I saw lots of dark, I proved it by banging into 3 other defenseless tables on the way there. Now, this shouldn't have been a problem now. There was no bright sunlight to have to come in out of, but it didn't matter.


Eventually,,,,,
Somebody said "sit", so I sat.
I kind of felt like I was doing a blindman's "musical chairs",,, and it turned out to be a great chair I slid into.

It was a great table. We were right by the river, lookiing at the volcano and the pyramid, yes, those I could see. But, that was about it.

After a couple of minutes, I finally asked, "Diane? Are you there?"
"Yes honey, I'm here".
The waitress came, and handed us our menus. Then said,,,,,,
" So, are you ready to order?"
Diane laughed, "Are you kidding? You just gave us the menus."
"Oh"
And she started to walk away, obviously confused by our answer.

Diane: But we will order drinks now, if it's ok.
waitress turns back, now big smile in her voice.
"Oh, I forgot, be right back."
And she ran away again.

We just looked at each other.
Well, she looked at me, her head was right where the volcano was spewing lava, so the brightness behind her blocked out her head.

The waitress was back in 40 seconds.
"Hokay, you ready to order now?"
I saw the outline of Diane's head wave back and forth, and then she ordered a margarita.
I said "ditto"

"OH, you want a ditto?" "How would you like your ditto?"
ok, she didn't really say that, I probably would have jumped in the river if she did, but she did just stand there and look at me.
" I'll have a margarita,too."
"Oh, you want two margarita's?"

(yes, THIS, she did say)

"No, well, yes. Geesh. " "One margarita for me, and one for my wife."
"Hokay?" I added.

That river was starting to look better and better.
We had about 3 minutes to read the menu before she was back.

I thought, "Man, that was fast, they must be pre-made", then I saw a little better,,,

Sans drinks.

She still wants our order and by golly, she's not leavin' till we're heavin',,,,she's not leaving till she get's our order.
I looked around and, uh oh,,, maybe a couple of tables finshing up,,,, but we are pretty much it.

I had been trying to hold the little candle thing up to the menu to see it, Diane was hanging over the railing trying to read by the glow of the lava.
Luckily, we had read the menu's on All ears net, and pretty much knew what we wanted.

I had the combinacion platter, I think she had a steak thing, mexican style going on, I could be wrong though.
I don't remember what she ordered for an appetizer. Could have been aardvark for all I could see.

I ordered a floodlight.

No, sorry, not sure what I got for an appetizer,,, I do know that chips and salsa are brought to your table anyway, and I remembered this from the REAL review I had read on All Ears,,,,so,,,, I mentioned this to our lovely, "I barely speaka da English and aren't I cute," waitress.

She dropped her hands down at her side with the pad and pen in them,,, gave a huge audible "SIGH",,,,,and disappeared for the third time,,, or was it the fourth already?

90 seconds later,,,,,,,

"Ok, here's your chips, the green is the hot sauce, the red is only a little hot, the kitchen is ready to close so that's why I was kind of hurrying you along.

It was incredible,,, she went from cute little Mexican girl to Alice, in less than two minutes, and she left again.

At about this time, I should say that I'm not the best person you want to have critiqueing a Mexican style eatery. I have gotten better over the years, I really hated this food for a long time, but, to me, it's all still "GLOP"

So, chips and salsa are now on out table, I still hadn't even gotten to a single one.

Our drinks were there in less than 3 minutes.

Appetizers arrived 2.5 minutes after that.

Not five minutes went by and she's wheeling out the entree cart to us.
I thought Diane was going to go through the roof!

This isn't a relaxing, fine dining experience, this is a pit stop at the Indy 500!
THAT wouldn't be as rushed as this was!

Hey! we haven't even started yet on the appetizers! Don't even think about putting that stuff on our table. Why don't you just bring us some corn flakes and milk and we'll take care of breakfast too, while we're at it!" Yep, Smidgy was hot, that was her, not me.

I had a reasonably good idea that the sarcasm was lost on the waitress, but I loved the line, and gave wifey a high five.
Which of course hit her in the forehead.

About ten minutes later, the food was wheeled out to us again. And , no, they didn't ask if we were ready, they just decided that it was time to "pop" it up to us again. Kinda like Rosie O'donnel on tv how she just keeps "popping" back up.
( that struck me funny reading that again tonight,,,, geesh, that was over 5 years ago I wrote that and it still apllies.)

From what I could see, my plate was just packed. I'm not convinced that instead of putting the food back under the warmers, when we first rejected it, that they just didn't pile on more stuff that was still hot on top.

I'm starving. A combination platter lets me be safe, gotta be something I'll like. Right?
I tried the glop on a tortilla. Not bad.
I tried the glop in a tortilla. Not bad.
The glop baked with different kinds of glop, they're all cousins, that was supposed to stay in the tortilla, but wouldn't. Some of the cousins tried to escape down my arm. Not bad

The hermetically sealed glop that you could actually pick up with your hands, and eat it without it running down your arm, I believe this invention is called a burrito glop, it wasn't bad either.
But if you did try to put it down and then pick it back up,,,uh uh,, you were now contributing to making your entire plate swamp of glop. I know, I tried to put it down and pick it up again.

If you did, all the runaway glop from the lesser connecting glop species would infiltrate, and your hermetically sealed glop would now have a "glop" coating, rendering it useless to try to pick up again. So your "hand eating" is now officially over.

Where was I?
Oh.
This buritto type glop.
Not bad!
Let's see. Am I shortchanging any glop here?

Oh yes!

Refried glop!
And this was bad.
I tried just a wee bit of it,,,and it really lived up to its' name,,,it reminded me of baked beans that you brought home from the church picnic,,, nuked them up later that night and had some more,,, then did the same thing for lunch tomorrow,,,, and,,, the next day,,,, "Oh look, there's stil some baked beans left!" and you nuke the whole batch up again.

After trying just a bit like I said,, I got the feeling that these beans may date back to Schiller Park Woods, 1970.

I could barely see the area where the beans were residing, I just knew to avoid "Nine O'clock" on the plate.

I had meant to re-critique Diane on how she felt about her meal, but,,,,,,,I forgot.
Don't worry though, if I'm off base on something here, I think she'll let you know!

During dinner, I looked around, and we were the only ones in there.! Honest, really truly. It got down to just me and her, and now you could see why the waitress couldn't get rid of us fast enough. And, Oh gee, the tip is included, so she doesn't have to worry about that, now does she?

I had no problem with the food, and believe me, there was plenty of it, I didn't come close to finishing, neither did Diane. But the service totally sucked.

I don't know. Maybe if there were more folks there eating, there might have been a few more lights on. If a romantic dinner is what you have in mind, then this place is for you. Just remember;
You might find out that whom you're leaving with isn't who you came in with.
and with that I'm going to say "menyana"

________________________________________________

No, we haven't eaten there since,, but I havent ruled it out,,it's just more and issue of too many other places we'd rather eat at,,,, heck,,, just around the house we have about 8 Taquiria's we haven't even tried yet.
And yes,,, for Mexican food, The San Angel Inn is not cheap!

Good thing I am!

 

[pumba]

thanks for that review..
I am sooooooo laughing...this is one reason we dont go back there...TO DARN DARK..and we dont know what we are ordering let alone eating...WE used the citranella candle too but that didnt work out to much...
Thanks again

 

[mmeb144]

I can see dark, where no one else can.

Still a funny line.

 

[Backstage_Gal]

If a romantic dinner is what you have in mind, then this place is for you. Just remember;
You might find out that whom you're leaving with isn't who you came in with.

Now there is an interesting thought.

 

[laura74]

Carnegie Hall of Dark ...I may have to steal that one.

 

[nebo]

Yeah, if you didn't know where this review is for, no way
would you figure it out from that title.

For today's short episode, we are going back to February of '09, T-Rex had recently opened at Downtown Disney, and
we didn't know too much about it, cept it was run by the Rainforest Cafe people.

We have never been in a Rainforest Cafe at Disney,, we have one not too far from our home
in the Chicago area,,,,,, but Dinosaurs?
Nebo STILL loves Dinosaurs!

(stop it right now, you're doing that 'talking in the 3rd person' thing again, no, it doesn't make you a celebrity)

Alright, back in time we go,,,,,,,


It is time for our appointment at T-Rex. Yes, I use the word appointment here because that's how I feel. You make reservations for Easter Brunch, other holidays, but it seems now you also have to have one at Disney if you want to eat there, anywhere. And I do get tired of having to drop what your doing just to be at a certain restaurant at a certain time, ergo, appointments.
The day I have to make an appointment to eat at Sleepy
Hollow to get a funnel cake is when I give up Disney,,, and
Theme Parks permanently.

Luckily, there really is nothing planned at all today, and it's still too cold for pool time so this I was really looking forward to.

Ok, time for some:
DI-
NO_
MEAT!

That was a lame attempt of J J Walker? Did I get that right?,,, You know,,,, Di-no-mi,,,,, ah, forget it.

Besides, I was starved! Hadn't eaten at all today yet, and didn't eat much yesterday because it's hard to chew properly when your teeth are clenched in pain. Both of us were starved.

T rex is made up of several different areas, or rooms.
The pteradactyl, the coral, the ice and the sequoia rooms.
All themed a little differently.
Ok, in some cases, a LOT differently.

We sat in the pteradactyl (and I'm not going to type that again) room.
This is mainly the first room you will enter in from the outside, and it's got the best Dinos in it, along with the namesake, pterries.

THis is one of the first things we saw when entering.

Of course our host tried to seat us right by the open doorway, where it was about 50 degrees and we would have had a lovely view of tourists walking by outside. Diane would have none of that and got us moved to a table further in. Dons't you just love it when they purposely try to give you a crappy table, even though there are better ones available?

That's why when we check into a resort,,, always, always try to get there early,, you don't have to take the crappy "parking lot" view when you know that its Sunday morning, and half the resort is changing over today.
A common line from us is,," Um, no thanks, we just drove 1250 miles to get here and don't want to see another car for a week if we don't have to,, have you got something not facing a parking lot?
Only once has it not worked, in DOZENS of times we've done the check in game.

Sorry, went off on a cotangent.

THIS was a great table. We sat directly underneath this guy, and since it's the ptera........ big bird room, you know what is going to be right over us.

That's right, Ray Romano, ergo, the "Manny" in the title, from Ice Age.
(thank you, thank you, it was nothing, really)

When our waitress came, this also gave me a chance to use an old line that has always been a favorite of mine.

Looking up and pointing at Old Ray I said, "So, does that come with cole slaw and fries?"

Smidgy did what she has done a lot this trip and groaned.

I got the feeling she had heard that one before because I got the obligatory smile with no teeth. Well, she had teeth,
but it wasn't the kind of real smile that shows you teeth.

We are paying out of pocket so that means going cheap.
Come to think of it,, it's not on the Dining Plan anyway so of course we are paying out of pocket.

Ok, let's see now; Diane got the paleozoic chicken sandwich, grilled and served with bacon and lettuce and tomatoes and avacado stuffage on fried pizza dough. Something like that, I'm close and I can't believe I came up with that much.

I got the bronto burger.

It tasted just like cow, don't let the name fool you.

Both sandwiches came with chips, but these aren't your basic Ruffles chips here, these are made there and much thicker, kinda of like very flat french fries, or really crispy American fries.

To both of our surprise they were quite good, a little pricey at 12 for the burger and 13 for the chicken, but you are paying for the atmosphere here, and believe me, their electric bill had to be enormous.

After ordering we both got up to look around, I grabbed the camera.

THis fellow was in one corner;

Then we went into the ice room.

I think this guy was right at the border of the ice room and sequioa room.

In my opinion, the ice room is probably to coolest looking, it also seems to undergo the biggest change every 20 minutes or so when the meteor storm hits,, all the blue walls and lighting turn bright red. The color change and sound effects are very dramatic,,, you could hear kids everywhere going "Ooooh, and ahhhh".

Ok, that was me,,,, but lots of kids were doing it too. Again, the meteor storm would happen every 20 minutes, so you are guaranteed at least 2 of them while you are there.

The coral room is by the bar and the sequioa room is way in the back, and wasn't even open when we were there.
Even the bar area is cool with these huge jellyfish suspended frm the ceiling, so even if you aren't planning on eating there, you can still stop in and have a drink and soak up the atmosphere in there,,, your kids will love it.

Back at the table our cokes came, and then the place started messing with me.
Every once in a while there would be a light tap on my shoulder.

I'd turn and look, and nothing there. After the third time, I noticed that it was starting to get a little wet, something from above was driipping on me, that was the tap I felt.

I gave Old Ray a funny look.
Diane asked what's wrong, and I told her.

"Ray's drooling on me!" "It's mammoth mucus!"

Naturally, right then the waitress was standing there, so I had to explain it to her. She told me it was probably from an air conditioning unit above.

Yeah, right, it was 55 degrees out.

All in all, it was a delightful time, no complaints at all and I'd go back there again. If you have kids, I promise you they will still be talking about T-Rex, it's by the same company that has the Rainforest Cafe, but in here it's like the rainforest on steroids.

Smidgy liked her sandwich, and I had no problem with my cheeseburger, though I suppose I still like the C-burger I get from Planet Hollywood a little better, it may be because that comes still with real fries, too.

By the way, it's not just when the meteor shower comes that the dinos move about, they do so almost constantly a little the whole time, heads swaying, tails wagging, drooling on me, but during the storm they are a lot more active, if you have kids it's an event all in itself!

There is also a huge gift store attached to the building, try not to let kids see it on the way out, it has all kinds of neat stuff
that aren't at the usual "exit" gift stores after rides.

 

[mmeb144]

Your awesome review has caused me to make reservations for our June trip at T-rex. My 20 year old DS asked me if there were any characters at the restaurant. I said, "No, we are bringing the characters." No one ever laughs at that joke anymore...

 

[jakeybake]

Excellent reveiw as always!

My wife HATES to eat at San Angel Inn. Way too dark, the menu is confusing as hell and the food comes out like it was already eaten.

Way back when we were first married I would take her here each trip. I would request a table by the river and think I was Captain Romance. Little did I know that she was thinking that I was more like Captain Dumb @#$!!

Keep the reviews coming Nebo. We need to spice up the Dining Board and you are just the man to do it!!!

Jay