Requesting your childs classroom teacher?

[Silly Little Pixie]

My school technically has a "no request" policy. However, in reality, lots of parents request. Sometimes they get it, but sometimes they don't. The best bet for parents to get the teacher they want is to let the previous year's teacher know, and usually they'll try to work with that if possible. Toward the end of the school year, we divide up the students into next year's classes. We balance them out by high/low achievers, RSP, english learners, kids who need to be separated from other kids, behavior problems. We work hard to make each class as balanced as possible, to make it fair for the teachers and the kids. Nobody wants to have their kid in a class full of low achievers or behavior problems! And we know our colleagues better than the parents do- nobody wants to send on one of "their babies" to a teacher whose style doesn't mesh. Sometimes it's unavoidable though.

So those of you that do request- remember that it does upset the balance that the school tries to create, even if it's just the boy/girl ratio or high achiever/low achiever ratio. You may think it's purely random, but I would bet that someone somewhere worked on making a good class list.

 

[Aliceacc]

This will be my 23rd year teaching high school math. I was department chair for 7 years before my kids came along.

Am I a good teacher? It depends on who you ask.

Ask the 2 kids who got 100's on their final exam, or the kids who got 99's, and I'm guessing the answer will be yes. Ask the kids who were on the border and pulled it out in the end, and I'm guessing the answer will be the same.

In fact, ask the 174 kids who passed my class, and I bet that most of them agree that I'm good.

But ask those 6 kids who failed, and I'm not sure what their answer will be.

Here's my point: I teach the exact same lesson in the exact same words to each student sitting in front of me during a given class. Yet some think I'm wonderful, some think I'm horrible, and the others fall somewhere in the middle.

So how can someone else's opinion of a teacher tell you what's right for your child? How do you know which of those opinions is the one you need to hear??

I say let it happen the way it will happen. You may be surprised to find that you like the teacher you were warned against.

(Previous family experience with the teacher is a different matter. )

 

[Kath2003]

I agree - I teach high school so I see a LOT of students on a weekly basis. Some of them will love the way I teach. Some of them will think I'm okay. Some of them will have issues that aren't to do with teaching but how I manage the class behaviourally. Some of them will think I set too much homework, some of them will think I set too little. Some of their parents will think I'm fantastic, some of them will think that I'm not so great, some of them will make judgements based on their preconceptions of what I am like as a teacher (young, female, first job etc.).

Personally I would just ignore what everyone else has said and let your DS take his chances. If he gets a yelling teacher, go in and have a coffee with her. Explain your concerns, adult to adult. If, once you've done this, your son is still unhappy you not only have reason to deselect that teacher, but the school is more likely to listen to any requests you have should your son wish to be removed from her class.

(My favourite teacher at school was one everyone 'warned against' because she was 'too harsh'. She was harsh because she wanted us to learn, and I thrived on it. 75% of the class hated her for it though )

 

[shortbun]

There were a few years I had an opinion about my son's teacher. I let the principal know in May. I wrote her a letter with my reasons. I never directly said the teacher's name-I just described them and their style to a T. Always worked. Might be too late as most schools make those decisions prior to the end of the earlier year. I have always asked for the teacher that would challenge my son the most. Often those have been the tougher teacher but the classroom thrives.

 

[mjkacmom]

I would flip a lid if I knew teachers were YELLING at kids in school, any kids, mine or anybody else's. You can be reprimanded and fired for that here (I have several close friends who are teachers and they say it's a huge no-no). There is still a horrible teacher in the public system that I know of (could be more, she is just the one I am personally aware of due to experience) but she is not a yeller. She would have been fired long ago for that!

Not easy to fire a tenured teacher...

 

[mjkacmom]

We have the same "no-request" policy, but you can "De-request". And parents request and derequest ALL the time. And I have done it too. We moved to this district when DS was starting 1st grade. DS and teacher just did not click. (Outside of class, I loved his teacher. They were just not the right match in class.) Teacher was always on DS. Too slow, too neat, too talkative, messy desk, and sit still....Now, mind you, I volunteered in the class every day. And I could see how differently DS was treated. We were new and did not want to create waves.
But I did request a teacher for and grade. And we got her! DS loved his teacher. I let her know that 1st grade teacher thought DS had ADD/ADHD, to please keep an eye on him and tell me if she thought the same. She said she didn't see. Same with 3rd grade. I requested 2 teachers. DS got my first choice. He did wonderful! He earned Academic Excellence. Now 4th is right around the corner. We didn't request/derequest. The teacher I would have derequested is the Honors Math teacher. The teacher I would have requested is the Honors Reading teacher. DS8 will get both teachers this year. So it should be interesting.

You volunteered every day? Let the kid go! BTW, our schools have no parent volunteers, and I went to the same district 35 years ago, and still no volunteers (except for PTO, outside school hours). It is okay for kids to be away from parents for a few hours.

 

[aprilgail2]

There were a few years I had an opinion about my son's teacher. I let the principal know in May. I wrote her a letter with my reasons. I never directly said the teacher's name-I just described them and their style to a T. Always worked. Might be too late as most schools make those decisions prior to the end of the earlier year. .

That is how ours works too- I did not want her to have the male 3rd grade teacher (NOT because he is male for other reasons!) so I wrote that she would work better with a female teacher. This year I made a request too as did many others because there is a pregnant teacher and no one wants a pregnant teacher, we went through that in 1st grade and it makes a rough switching around year for the kids. This one is due in Dec which means she will be there, then she won't and then she will come back again before the end of the year..I would rather have the same teacher there with no long absences with subs. Sure it can happen with a sickness or an emergancy with any teacher but when you know about it in advance at least you can try to avoid that teacher...

 

[crz4mm2]

I did this one year when DD was in school.
It was a very GOOD decision.
I had my own "policy" about not interfering with teachers. After a couple of not so great ones, I asked for her to be placed in a good room.

Good luck. Each school has a "policy" or every parent would do this

 

[marshallandcartersmo]

You volunteered every day? Let the kid go! BTW, our schools have no parent volunteers, and I went to the same district 35 years ago, and still no volunteers (except for PTO, outside school hours). It is okay for kids to be away from parents for a few hours.

Wow. When I would volunteer in my childs class I worked. I don't mean I sat there and watched, I WORKED. Made copies, graded papers, put together packets, hung posters, helped kids one on one that needed it.....I could go on and on.
In our school teachers NEED volunteers. Beg for volunteers. Most teachers don't have aids (budget cuts) and there's not enough hours in the day to do it all.

 

[mjkacmom]

Wow. When I would volunteer in my childs class I worked. I don't mean I sat there and watched, I WORKED. Made copies, graded papers, put together packets, hung posters, helped kids one on one that needed it.....I could go on and on.
In our school teachers NEED volunteers. Beg for volunteers. Most teachers don't have aids (budget cuts) and there's not enough hours in the day to do it all.

I just feel strongly that one lesson that school teaches is that it's okay for mommy not to be there, that if something happens, things will be okay, even if mommy isn't in the building. Our schools dont' have aides (except if one is required due to an IEP), but they manage.

 

[MELSMICE]

This will be my 23rd year teaching high school math. I was department chair for 7 years before my kids came along.

Am I a good teacher? It depends on who you ask.

Ask the 2 kids who got 100's on their final exam, or the kids who got 99's, and I'm guessing the answer will be yes. Ask the kids who were on the border and pulled it out in the end, and I'm guessing the answer will be the same.

In fact, ask the 174 kids who passed my class, and I bet that most of them agree that I'm good.

But ask those 6 kids who failed, and I'm not sure what their answer will be.

Here's my point: I teach the exact same lesson in the exact same words to each student sitting in front of me during a given class. Yet some think I'm wonderful, some think I'm horrible, and the others fall somewhere in the middle.

So how can someone else's opinion of a teacher tell you what's right for your child? How do you know which of those opinions is the one you need to hear??

I say let it happen the way it will happen. You may be surprised to find that you like the teacher you were warned against.

(Previous family experience with the teacher is a different matter. )

I am not a teacher, but this is exactly how I feel.

Example: Oldest DD got "the" Honors Global teacher as a freshman. I heard so many horrible things about her. We told DD you can't always pick who you deal with in life & to make her own opinion - we would not change her class. She came home one day ranting & raving because she got a horrible grade on an essay paper. She ranted with "the teacher is stupid, how could she do this to me, everyone was right".......... blah, blah, blah. DH & I read the essay - it deserved the grade it got!!!!

We sat her down & had a long talk about what this teacher obviously expected & how we agreed. We also told her to get to the know the teacher on a more personal level - maybe because of her "rep" it was tough to relate to some of the kids. The rest of the year was fine for DD. The class/teacher taught her more than Global that year.

Next year the neighbor got her. Son or mother couldn't stand her because the teacher expected organization & to be respected & was not getting it. Oh well, so sad, too bad as far as I'm concerned.

Last year one of my twin DD's got the same teacher for the honors class. I had some reservations about this DD having this same teacher, but again, life doesn't always hand you things with cherries on top. DD absolutely loved that teacher & the teacher loved her. Every day she talked about "Mrs. K" & her family. They hit it off incredibly - she was one of DD's favorite teachers ever & she did well in the class.

So, re-read what the poster wrote that I quoted..............every child has a different experience. Let them be the judge & if it's a tough year it's better to teach them how to handle it then bail them out of something because they don't like it. Life is tough sometimes. JMO!!!

 

[Tink&SquirtsMom]

I requested my sons kindergarten teachers last year (or I guess you could say I de-requested, since there were only two choices, it's the same thing). My daughter had the other set of teachers (2 teachers per class of 20 at their school) and I could not believe how much the little boys got away with when I was volunteering in the classroom (which is a requirement of all parents whose kids attend the school up through 8th grade). I'm talking some near chaos in the classroom with basic classroom rules not being enforced. At the same time, I was extremely impressed with the way the other two teachers classroom ran and knew right away my son would thrive there. My kids go to a charter, and it has some very different teaching/learning methods than traditional school.... which has been phenomenal for my kids (particularly my dyslexic dd), but also creates a very different classroom dynamic with lots of freedom in the schedule and movement about the classroom. It also opens the door for sneaky little boys to get pretty creative. I made sure my son got put in with the stricter teachers.

Hes one of those that will not step over the line, but will bend it absolutely as far as he can. The problem in the class my dd had (which was great for her as she is not a limits tester and responded well to the teachers personalities) is that no line was ever drawn. In the classroom I requested the rules were firm, clear, consistently and positively enforced (no yelling). I requested that because I wanted my son to start school with firm boundaries and being expected to follow rules. He had some discipline problems in the beginning (addressed both at school and at home) but he got it together and now knows what behavior is acceptable at school. I don't know what would have happened when he went into 2nd grade, if he had the other two teachers for k/1st and didn't have those basic behavior standards and rules being reinforced and expected of him at the school.

On the flip side I didn't request teachers for my dd for 2nd grade this past year, because I didn't have any personal knowledge of either of the sets of teachers to have a reason to do so. Then I heard some comments (not positive ones) about the ones she did get. Well those teachers turned out to be awesome. They made my dd, even with all her academic issues and IEP, LOVE school (not just like it, or put up with it, but actually look forward to going). I am just beyond impressed by them and am so thrilled she'll have them the next few years (we have teachers for at least 2 years at the school, dd should have this set for 3).

I guess my point is, I don't see a problem requesting (or de-requesting) if you have a personal knowledge of a teacher and know strongly that something will or will not work for your young child. But I also would not judge that based on another parent's opinion of what is right for their child, since each child is so different. I just would try and have an open mind with the teacher and not let what ther parents have said impact your view of the them.

 

[twinmomplus2new]

I have had 2 instances in 21 years of parenting where I let it go and did not request a particular teacher. dd now 21 I did not know anyone and let the chips fall. My DD still talks to this day about how mean and miserable she was.
I then requested it was allowable....All thru to JR high no issues wonderful teachers.

DS 14 requested each and every single teacher till he got to the high school level. And I don't regret it one bit.

twin ds's now 7. I did not request because the principal did not allow it. It was a miserable horrible year resulting in them wanting to quit school in kindergarten.

I went to the principal and laid out the entire year, and said I am not going to request any teacher. I am going to ask you that after this year to put them with someone kind. She complied and let me tell you what a great year they had!!!! Thier teacher and I are very close and I count her now as one of my closets friends. going into second. I was allowed imput since it was the first year they seperated them. I was very pleased with both placements, Both are teachers my older 2 have had before.

To each his own.. But I simply can not and will not spend another miserable year with a child of mine crying about going to school. I will continue to request. there is alot of time in life to have to deal with difficult people elementary school doesn't have to be one of them.

 

[MAGICX2]

You volunteered every day? Let the kid go! BTW, our schools have no parent volunteers, and I went to the same district 35 years ago, and still no volunteers (except for PTO, outside school hours). It is okay for kids to be away from parents for a few hours.

I just feel strongly that one lesson that school teaches is that it's okay for mommy not to be there, that if something happens, things will be okay, even if mommy isn't in the building. Our schools dont' have aides (except if one is required due to an IEP), but they manage.

I do agree that volunteering everyday in your own childs classroom kind of defeats the purpose. However, I volunteer at my childs school because I enjoy it. I always request that I be put with a teacher other than my childs. This way I am still helping out, but I am giving them their space as well. I know from experience that my child will be more difficult when I am around then when I am not. Like most children, your kids act up for you but can be angels for others. On the days I volunteer I do eat lunch with my son and he really enjoys this.

 

[addicted_to_WDW]

DS is going into high school this year, and I've never requested a particular teacher. My general policy is one of noninterference. DS knows that I'll contact the teachers if necessary but he also knows that he needs to adapt to new situations even when they aren't the exact situations he would prefer.

 

[Chipmunk89]

You volunteered every day? Let the kid go! BTW, our schools have no parent volunteers, and I went to the same district 35 years ago, and still no volunteers (except for PTO, outside school hours). It is okay for kids to be away from parents for a few hours.

Yes, I volunteered EVERYDAY. Not just his teacher, but all the teachers in his grade, plus all the other grades. As well as the office, and the resource teachers, and Special Ed. Teachers and staff appreciate a parent who can come in and tutor or read to the students. As well as copy for the grades, and help out where it's needed. I also help organize all the volunteers for the school.

I actually hardly ever see my DS during the day.

But thanks for the concern.

 

[Chipmunk89]

Wow. When I would volunteer in my childs class I worked. I don't mean I sat there and watched, I WORKED. Made copies, graded papers, put together packets, hung posters, helped kids one on one that needed it.....I could go on and on.
In our school teachers NEED volunteers. Beg for volunteers. Most teachers don't have aids (budget cuts) and there's not enough hours in the day to do it all.

ITA! It's really hard work. And the schools NEED volunteers!

I just feel strongly that one lesson that school teaches is that it's okay for mommy not to be there, that if something happens, things will be okay, even if mommy isn't in the building. Our schools dont' have aides (except if one is required due to an IEP), but they manage.

Sorry if my volunteering bothers you. Maybe you should try it. Our school has loyal volunteers that have stayed to help long after their children have left the school.