Really???

[npmommie]

Paddling is legal here, and my boss is quite fond of it. But parents have to sign to allow it. A form is sent home every year. Teachers are allowed to paddle as well. In 13 years of teaching, I have never even owned a paddle. I have been called in to witness a few times. It isn't my choice of punishment, but it is very common. I wouldn't be upset if it was outlawed, though.

Any child who is on the no paddle list is suspended. Most kids will just take the paddling and go back to class.

You will all love this. Once every few weeks we have what my boss calls a "T" party. He calls out a list of kids who have had 3 or more tardies, lines them up, and paddles them one at a time.

BTW, I'm a high school teacher.

I'm sorry but your boss sounds like some kind of sick perv with a spanking fetish. That story is disturbing in all kinds of ways.

 

[laurie31]

Can you tell me what the guidelines she broke were?

If the dress broke the guidelines why was she allowed in?

Are these 'guidelines' consistently enforced at the school?

The dress was short but not mini-skirt short. Showed a little clevage but that was more because of her size up there... not because it was cut real low. It was a formal dress.

The article said the dress could not show cleavage below the breastbone, so that "crack" visible between her...mammary glands...was against code. Also, the dress could not be shorter than 6 inches above the knee. Now, I wasn't around for the miniskirt thing in the 60s, but 6 inches above the knee seems crazy short to me. On me, a dress that short would not allow me to sit down without revealing WAY too much. In other words, I don't think the dress code itself is the problem. I think not being allowed into the prom after you've bought tickets, bought the dress, and planned your evening is more than enough punishment. A suspension for that is over the top, it's not like she came to school dressed like that, and I think everyone here agrees that paddling a high school senior is...well, just

 

[Ohiodislover]

Can you tell me what the guidelines she broke were?

If the dress broke the guidelines why was she allowed in?

Are these 'guidelines' consistently enforced at the school?

The dress was short but not mini-skirt short. Showed a little clevage but that was more because of her size up there... not because it was cut real low. It was a formal dress.

The article said the dress could not show cleavage below the breastbone, so that "crack" visible between her...mammary glands...was against code. Also, the dress could not be shorter than 6 inches above the knee. Now, I wasn't around for the miniskirt thing in the 60s, but 6 inches above the knee seems crazy short to me. On me, a dress that short would not allow me to sit down without revealing WAY too much. In other words, I don't think the dress code itself is the problem. I think not being allowed into the prom after you've bought tickets, bought the dress, and planned your evening is more than enough punishment. A suspension for that is over the top, it's not like she came to school dressed like that, and I think everyone here agrees that paddling a high school senior is...well, just

Exactly

And from the article, do we know if she was let in? She shouldn't have been, but it should have ended there, IMO.

 

[december]

I'm sorry but your boss sounds like some kind of sick perv with a spanking fetish. That story is disturbing in all kinds of ways.

He's not. And it isn't abnormal HERE. People were asking questions earlier in the thread, and I posted about my area. Our perceptions are based on our on experiences. Paddling is not the norm in some parts of the country, so it is shocking for some of you to read about. But here it is common. I must again state that I don't endorse it, but there is nothing sexual about it. Here, a principal that does not believe in paddling would be the abnormal one.

I do think corporal punishment in general is more common in the south. We had a big family trip to CA two years ago. My niece was having a tantrum, and my bil spanked her in the middle of DL. My MIL freaked-thought he was going to be arrested! BIL is a cop BTW. He wasn't too concerned.

We rarely spank, and I do have my kids on the no paddle list. I rarely give tardies, because I know the punishment. So I'm not arguing for either side. Just giving a different perspective.

 

[Eeyore'sthebest]

Corporal punishment is legal in many states. I was very surprised when I looked it up. My dgd got in trouble at school and my dss was told he had to come to school and paddle her in front of the principal. This was last year in Tenn.

Umm, just WOW. DD would have been taken from school and that would have been the last they saw of her. No way anyone tells me when to paddle my child. No way! That's scary to me.

I don't understand why they just didn't tell her she couldn't attend the prom. That's what would happen at our schools. No other punishment just the fact that they wouldn't be allowed to attend the prom.

Makes sense to me.

I'm sorry but your boss sounds like some kind of sick perv with a spanking fetish. That story is disturbing in all kinds of ways.

I'm with you.

He's not. And it isn't abnormal HERE. People were asking questions earlier in the thread, and I posted about my area. Our perceptions are based on our on experiences. Paddling is not the norm in some parts of the country, so it is shocking for some of you to read about. But here it is common. I must again state that I don't endorse it, but there is nothing sexual about it. Here, a principal that does not believe in paddling would be the abnormal one.

I do think corporal punishment in general is more common in the south. We had a big family trip to CA two years ago. My niece was having a tantrum, and my bil spanked her in the middle of DL. My MIL freaked-thought he was going to be arrested! BIL is a cop BTW. He wasn't too concerned.

We rarely spank, and I do have my kids on the no paddle list. I rarely give tardies, because I know the punishment. So I'm not arguing for either side. Just giving a different perspective.

I appreciate the information because it seriously means that I will never move to Mississippi. To me, that is just plain nuts. And I understand that this is not your point of view but its still scary that this takes place.

 

[Becky2005]

And from the article, do we know if she was let in? She shouldn't have been, but it should have ended there, IMO.

I think that's what I've been trying to figure out -- why even bother giving a punishment seperately from not attending the event.

The way I'm reading it, which is why I could actually understand the other kids taking the paddling, is if you show up inapporpriately dressed, you will still be allowed to go to the dance as long as you take a punishment for it.

Hence, OK...I could see the kids saying "I'll just take the paddling and then I get to go have fun at the dance anyway" & did they paddle them while IN the Prom dress? One like hers with lots of layers, eh? Could work out to be no big deal since I'm assuming they do the paddling clothed? (I'm really not going to assume anything since I have no idea how it works and NOTHING would surprise me with schools) -- now in the suspension case, since if you are suspended from school, I'm assuming you are not allowed to attend school functions either -- therefore they could have told her "Since you are taking suspension, you aren't allowed at the dance" (and then does that count as Day 1 of the suspension or is it the following school day????).

That seems kind of messed up way of dealing with it to me. Our school has a dress code for dances and basically you would be turned away, end of story -- although I'm convinced they don't really enforce our dress code too much. Especially since if they put my DD in her gym shorts which is what they say they will do, that wouldn't meet dress code! I know when she was a cheerleader Freshman year and they wore their uniforms, the skirts didn't meet dress code!

 

[MelanieC]

I'm shocked that there is paddling in some states still. I really thought it was totally illegal. There is no way I'd let someone "paddle" my kids. I don't even "paddle" them and don't believe in it. WOW just WOW.

 

[MaryAnnDVC]

What trend do you see?

Sorry, was rolling my eyes at the poster who noticed the trend.

My guess is that the trend follows party lines, which would be political, and would turn this thread into something it doesn't need to be.

That was my guess as well. Just wanted to see if once the gauntlet was thrown, the thrower would own up to the post or run and hide.

Well of course not...what were you thinking

Oh, see, I was going to say that the trend looked as though it were the south. I would have then proceeded to make some off color remarks about how backwards y'all are down there and as long as the school principal and the student weren't cousins, it wasn't sexual.

Good thing I didn't say that, I would have been way off base.

What a delight to come back to this thread this morning and see these comments. Such drama! Here's the scoop...my daughter, who is away at college and I haven't seen since mid-February...arrived home for the weekend shortly after I posted my last comment and...hard to believe...I spent the evening catching up with her and I didn't give this thread a second thought until I looked on the DIS this morning and ran down the threads on page 1 to see which ones I had posted to. And when I saw this, I thought "oh yeah...that one." I've been on this type (paddling) thread before, and I've rehashed it all then...just not that interested in devoting a huge amount of time to it. I didn't wake up this morning anxious to see where it all went.

But, since I'm here I'll respond. Political party lines never even occurred to me. Southern states...absolutely. And before people point out that there are North and South in each category...yeah, I get it. I commented last evening to my DH about this thread and the whole bizarre concept of children being paddled in school in 2010 and asked what he noticed about the list of "legal" states and he said "Southern states...that whole bible belt thing." I'm not "creating" a trend...I'm noticing one. The whole "cousin" comment wasn't mine, and didn't occur to me, and if it did, I would not openly chuckle about it on the DIS.

Paddling is legal here, and my boss is quite fond of it. ... I have been called in to witness a few times.

You will all love this. Once every few weeks we have what my boss calls a "T" party. He calls out a list of kids who have had 3 or more tardies, lines them up, and paddles them one at a time.

Your boss sounds like a sicko, and I would absolutely refuse to witness a paddling.

The new principal is younger, 40s, but is a firm believer in paddling, too. He is the middle school principal now, and has quite a reputation on this.

Ick.

And...back when I was in high school (1980's) they would BROADCAST the paddlings over the intercom! We always felt sorry for the kid, not just because he was being paddled, but because everyone KNEW. My guess is, it's not still done that way. One would hope, anyway.

That brings it to a whole other disgusting level.

I've seen bad porn that starts that way...

Grown men paddling teenagers doesn't sound right in any way, shape, or form. It all gets a big ol what the heck from me.

I'm sorry but your boss sounds like some kind of sick perv with a spanking fetish. That story is disturbing in all kinds of ways.

I agree with the above statements.

 

[Scurvy]

ETA - I'm wondering if the people in "legal" states who have never seen it, maybe it's because all the parents are returning the forms denying permission?

It's legal in my state. I have never seen a form to allow or deny permission, nor have I ever seen or heard of a child being spanked in any school I've been involved with.

That there are rules, and consequences for not following the rules, and that the consequences ARE enforced? While you may not agree with the specific consequences, how can anyone reasonably DISagree with the lesson?

Exacty. Though honestly the girl doesn't sound like the brightest bulb in the bunch. I watched the video and read the article and I'm beginning to wonder if she just couldn't understand the guidelines. She asked "What cleavage?" when told her dress was too low. Really? She couldn't see the cleavage? Does she not know how to use a mirror? (Though actually maybe she doesn't, because I think that dress was hideous and I can't imagine someone knowingly going out in something like that.) Then she said "This is high school. We are seniors. If you're going to act up, give us another option besides getting paddled, because this is not the 1940s. We don't take corporal punishment now." She was given another option. Maybe she forgot that part? And clearly she also doesn't realize she isn't speaking for everyone, because of the 18 people who broke the dress code, all but one did take the corporal punishment option.

[edited]

 

[abdmom]

The article said the dress could not show cleavage below the breastbone, so that "crack" visible between her...mammary glands...was against code. Also, the dress could not be shorter than 6 inches above the knee. Now, I wasn't around for the miniskirt thing in the 60s, but 6 inches above the knee seems crazy short to me. On me, a dress that short would not allow me to sit down without revealing WAY too much. In other words, I don't think the dress code itself is the problem. I think not being allowed into the prom after you've bought tickets, bought the dress, and planned your evening is more than enough punishment. A suspension for that is over the top, it's not like she came to school dressed like that, and I think everyone here agrees that paddling a high school senior is...well, just

The breastbone, or sternum, runs from the neck down to the top of the abdomen. So, in order to show cleavage "below the breastbone", the dress would have to be a lot lower from what I saw. The principal needs a lesson in anatomy.

Count me in as someone who is disgusted that paddling is legal anywhere. We once almost moved to OK. I'm glad we didn't.

 

[hereyago]

Ok, I am still confused: Did she attend the prom or not? Did she get there and they say you can stay but get paddled or take 3 day and you can come in? Or did she not get prom and decided to take a 3 day suspension. Becase by 18, if you were going to suspend me, I would have made it worth my while to do something besides wear the dress.

 

[NotUrsula]

I think that's what I've been trying to figure out -- why even bother giving a punishment seperately from not attending the event.

The way I'm reading it, which is why I could actually understand the other kids taking the paddling, is if you show up inapporpriately dressed, you will still be allowed to go to the dance as long as you take a punishment for it.

Hence, OK...I could see the kids saying "I'll just take the paddling and then I get to go have fun at the dance anyway" & did they paddle them while IN the Prom dress? One like hers with lots of layers, eh? Could work out to be no big deal since I'm assuming they do the paddling clothed? (I'm really not going to assume anything since I have no idea how it works and NOTHING would surprise me with schools) -- now in the suspension case, since if you are suspended from school, I'm assuming you are not allowed to attend school functions either -- therefore they could have told her "Since you are taking suspension, you aren't allowed at the dance" (and then does that count as Day 1 of the suspension or is it the following school day????).

That seems kind of messed up way of dealing with it to me. Our school has a dress code for dances and basically you would be turned away, end of story -- although I'm convinced they don't really enforce our dress code too much. Especially since if they put my DD in her gym shorts which is what they say they will do, that wouldn't meet dress code! I know when she was a cheerleader Freshman year and they wore their uniforms, the skirts didn't meet dress code!

All due respect, but I think that your guess is way off. I'm betting that what happened was that the issue of attendance at the dance and the issue of breaking the dress code were handled separately. I'm sure that she was ejected from the dance (if she got through the door in the first place), and then told something to the effect of: "There will be a punishment for attempting to defy the dress code for the dance. If you want to come back to school Monday, you'll have to take a paddling first thing that morning. Otherwise you are suspended for three school days effective immediately. Report to school on Thursday morning."

It isn't the state of the dress itself that she was punished for. She was punished for being openly defiant of school authorities. It was a rule, just like a no-smoking rule, and she broke it, and the paddling/suspension options were her punishment for doing so.

Dress-code violations are handled this way in DS' school, too (well, not paddlling, because the school doesn't use it.) What I mean is that it is not enough to just go change; there is an additional punishment on top of that because you knew the rule, and you chose to break it. In his school, they get detention for the first offense, detention and janitorial work for the second, and suspension for the third. Any more violations after the third suspension take you right to another suspension. In the first two cases, they have to also go home and change immediately if they don't have their uniforms at school, and going home during the school day means calling a parent to come down and sign you out. Any classwork that you happen to miss while you are making that round-trip home to change also gets marked as a zero.

 

[MaryAnnDVC]

Dress-code violations are handled this way in DS' school, too (well, not paddlling, because the school doesn't use it.) What I mean is that it is not enough to just go change; there is an additional punishment on top of that because you knew the rule, and you chose to break it.

And what most people are saying is that the most appropriate punishment would be to not be allowed into the prom, period. Not "Oops...not appropriate...go change and come back."

And, that paddling is a disgusting, outdated form of punishment, that should never be imposed.

I also think that there shouldn't be options for the rule-breaker. There should be a consequence, and that should be it. If my child broke a rule at home, I wouldn't say "So, what do you want to do...clean out the garage, or rake the lawn, or go to bed early, or..." Why is it put in the rule-breakers hands? Paddling isn't any more "right" by giving it as an option. It should be outlawed everywhere, and appropriate punishments that actually fit the crime should be imposed. IMHO, of course.

 

[MaryAnnDVC]

And I have to say...I'm just a little disappointed that those that accused me of trying to turn this into a political discussion have apparently run and hidden. OR maybe...are busy with real life?

OK...just want to announce...I've got cleaning to do for Easter, haven't bought a single item for Easter baskets or Easter brunch, so I may not respond immediately to any further accusations. But I will make a note to check back at my earliest convenience.

 

[Bluestars]

I don't think any punishment was necessary. If someone doesn't meet the dress code, don't let them in. No need to suspend or paddle.

I have never let anyone at a school paddle my kids and I never will. I was raised by parents who did not hit us and that's the way I have raised my own children. I can't see how it's legal for someone at school to hit a child with a paddle in current days. If they want to take violence out of the schools, stop hitting the kids at school.

 

[shortbun]

These people do not belong in teaching. First, the natural consequences to breaking dress code would be to deny attendance to the prom-nothing more. Second, paddling 17 and 18 year olds borders on fetish in my opinion and these folks are possible sex offenders. You do not paddle high school seniors. It's creepy and sick. Paddling children is creepy just anytime it's done by people NOT the parents of a child. So these men want to make sure the girls do not reveal too much but they want to paddle them. Really?

 

[RitaZ.]

Corporal punishment is legal in FL, but the schools in our district don't allow it.

 

[Momvic5]

I live in Texas where paddling is legal...the schools that my children attend or have attended have never used paddling as a punishment, but the high school that I attended did. I know that my parents had to sign a form allowing it every year because I worked in the office and saw many times forms being checked for approval. The school also had to notify the parents before a student could be paddled...a parent could request to be present. Also, our principal who was a man paddled the male students, and our vice principal who was a woman paddled all female students. Funny thing is....most students opted for the paddling...it was a quick punishment.

 

[PrincessKsMom]

Paddling is legal here, and my boss is quite fond of it. But parents have to sign to allow it. A form is sent home every year. Teachers are allowed to paddle as well. In 13 years of teaching, I have never even owned a paddle. I have been called in to witness a few times. It isn't my choice of punishment, but it is very common. I wouldn't be upset if it was outlawed, though.

Any child who is on the no paddle list is suspended. Most kids will just take the paddling and go back to class.

You will all love this. Once every few weeks we have what my boss calls a "T" party. He calls out a list of kids who have had 3 or more tardies, lines them up, and paddles them one at a time.

BTW, I'm a high school teacher.

You think your boss is a good guy, yet he makes a mockery of punishing these students, like it's his own personal party? Isn't this just another form of bullying. Hey, everyone, gather round. Let's get out list and have ourselves a good laugh.

 

[npmommie]

You think your boss is a good guy, yet he makes a mockery of punishing these students, like it's his own personal party? Isn't this just another form of bullying. Hey, everyone, gather round. Let's get out list and have ourselves a good laugh.

agree good post