Question for those of you who have ever sold their home (vent warning)

[Belle0101]

I am so very very mad right now. You can't even believe how angry I am. Here's the deal:

Our house went up for sale in late January. Last month a realtor called and wanted to know if she and her client could come look at the house in 5 minutes. Um, no. I had the flu and there was just no way I could have agreed to that. Okay, so she says she'll call back another day. She calls one morning and wants to bring her client that afternoon. It was very inconvenient but I wanted to get our house sold so I said yes and we set a time. We left and came back after more than 30 minutes. It was clear to me that they had never been yet. So I called my realtor to ask what we should do when suddenly the front door opened and in came the realtor, her client and her child. So we had to pack both kids, the 2 dogs and ourselves back into the van and leave again. They stayed for 30 minutes plus her son got out toys to play with and they were not put back.

Two weeks go by and the realtor calls again to ask if they can take one more look that afternoon. Okay, now my youngest son is sick but we agree -- pack up the dogs, the one healthy kid, the one sick kid, ourselves and off we go at the appointed time. They stayed for 30 minutes again.

On Monday afternoon my realtor told me they made an offer and they were letting me have until Tuesday morning to decide. The offer was ridiculous -- I can't tell you what my realtor said because it's profanity. Basically, she called it bull droppings. Got it? My first instinct, which I now wish I had gone with, was to say take a walk. They offered $4000 less than our house appraised for and for $1825 in allowances. We countered, they countered ... I still feel like we could have gotten a better deal had we said no and waited for another buyer but the advice I got from friends, family and my realtor was to take it. There are so many houses for sale in my neighborhood right now that it makes it a buyer's market at the moment. Potentially we could have been waiting a long time and since we already bought our new house that would have meant making 2 mortgage payments each month.

So what has me so mad? We already agreed to some things -- paying for an inspection, paying her closing costs, giving her possession of the garage before closing ... we've been more than generous and it cost us money we could have used too. Now today the realtor calls ... can they come over and measure the windows and rooms today so the buyer knows what size rugs to bring, what size curtains to buy ... I called my realtor and she said I do not have to say yes and to tell her they can do all the measuring they want during their final walk through before closing (March 31). I told her that and she had the nerve to argue with me, then call my realtor and tattle on my like a little kid!

My question is -- how far should you bend over to please your buyer? Where's the line? I mean this is my house, I still live here, my van is in the shop needing almost $7000 worth of repairs (possible design flaw and it looks like the dealer is going to pick up most of that), I can't pack up my dogs and go anywhere without a vehicle, we already started packing and stacking up boxes, meaning all that stuff would have to be moved so she can measure for curtains, rugs and all that. Let alone, we got this huge sob story about how poor she was and she's really struggling but now she can go out and buy curtains for windows that they asked for and got the curtains left for?

So where do you draw the line and how much do you owe the seller?

Thanks for listening to my vent and thanks in advance for sharing your experiences.

 

[MosMom]

Your situation sounds almost identical to ours. We were in our new house for 4 months before our house sold and it was tough to make 2 mortgages. We took the first buyer to come along because we got desperate and ended up paying $1400 to get out of our house. I kick myself now but it is a hard decision to make. They ended up having us pay for their first year of taxes (when no taxes were due on the house yet because it was so new) and everything you mentioned.

We really got railed and our realtor only cared about her commission and, I believe, gave us awful advice and didn't represent us as a realtor is paid to do. At closing she sprung an extra $500 on us that wasn't included in our final closing costs given to us that morning, she said she didn't know about it. But did she fight for us? Nooo, she suggested ways we could come up with an extra $500 (payroll advance, SELLING something, etc.). I started crying in the closing because we were already stretched paying to get out of the house and she really could have offered up a little bit of her commission but she didn't. We never heard from her again. Not even a phone call to say THANK YOU. Our buyers said the SAME thing yours did. How they were so poor and couldn't offer anymore but then also wanted in to measure for custom blinds and to have crown moulding put in.

Personally, if you are getting railed to begin with...I wouldn't bend over backwards. Then again, I'm just a *tad* bitter. LOL My experience made me never want to sell a house again!! That is YOUR house and you make the rules. They can wait until the final walk-through to measure. It won't hurt them to wait a few weeks!

 

[FOJMO]

My question is -- Why are you leaving your house when someone is coming to look at it? We have sold several houses over the years, and if we're home when the prospective buyer and real estate agent come by, so be it. We aren't going anywhere, nor were we ever asked to.

We make ourselves as inconspicuous as possible and avoid any questions unless directed to us by the real estate agent. But, it's our house and we stay put!

 

[Belle0101]

Maybe we had/have the same realtor LOL

Ours was all insulted when the offer affected her pocketbook (i.e., her commission) but when it affected my pocketbook she could have cared less and even told us this last counter was a really good deal. Once the sales price, which is what the commission is based on, got to where she liked it she was done "working " for me. I agreed to pay for some insurance at a quoted price of $300 but once I actually got into the office it was really $345. All she had to say sorry, it's more than I thought but it's a great deal. Yeah for her because it doesn't affect her pocketbook and she probably gets a kickback. I only say that because when I worked in sales you got the customer to buy the original product and then you got a kickback ($$) for any extras you could get them to buy.

I'm bitter too so you're not alone. I just have to keep reminding myself that at least we don't have the prospect of making 2 mortgage payments now. Once the papers are signed on 3/31 we are done! I can walk away and never look back and she can measure all she wants then.


As for leaving -- my realtor said since we have dogs we needed to leave each time. She said that would turn off people who are afraid of dogs, like they might get bit or something. I don't even have mean dogs. The one is a greyhound and the other is a 16 year old whippett. Real aggressive dogs, especially the whippett. LOL The worst that'll happen is you might trip over one since all they do is sleep. So I don't know, she said to leave so we leave.

 

[RUDisney]

When my parents sold their rental property, no problem. When they sold the house I grew up in, no problem. When they sold my DGM's house... wow, the problems! Now, FWIW, my DGM's house sold for between $30,000 and $35,000. The market for homes in Scranton is awful. My grandparents never had any trouble with the furnace or roof, etc., but the buyers brought in a house inspector who created problems. First of all, it's a cheap house. They weren't buying the Biltmore. Secondly, my parents were honest with them about the age of the roof and furnace, water heater, etc. They were leaving all of the appliances, as is customary, but they were also including w/d, which is not typical in this area. These people wanted concession after concession. There's a point in negotiations when you just have to compromise once and for all.

They buyer put my parents through hell and back. My parents finally signed paperwork with the attorney to give him agency to sign all of the papers over to the buyer so they didn't have to attend the closing. They sat by their cell phone in case there were any issues that came up. Luckily, none did, but my Mom knew that she couldn't face this woman for fear of popping her one in the bank's conference room.

My housing horror story, well, not horror, but stupid realtor story happened when we were buying our house. I called the realtor my parents dealt with in selling their 3 properties. I told him the town I wanted to live in, but I refused to live in one particular development that sits off of a major interstate and overlooks a landfill. (Quite honestly, I can't understand why people would build $200,000 homes with those two drawbacks.) He gave me the multilist book to look at and highlighted some homes that he thought I'd like in towns I had said I didn't want to live. Then, he fell off the planet. He didn't call until after we moved into the house that we found, by ourselves, and purchased directly from the previous owner. He told me he had found the perfect house for us... in the development that overlooked the highway and landfill. I told him we were quite happy in the house that we now owned... no thanks to him.

P.S. I wouldn't let them in to measure. At this point, the deal can still be broken... hopefully not... but things happen. Let them run amok in the house once they own it, not while you do.

 

[Pembo]

My house went on the market yesterday so I'm reading this with great interest.

First~I'm not planning to leave for every showing. I have 3 kids and a dog, where would I go?! When we sold our house 6 years ago, I remember staying home while ds was taking his nap.

Our realtor said it's best to keep your dog tied up/crated etc in case the potential buyer is afraid of dogs. But she also said she's been in homes with no owner and the dogs running loose!

I would not let them in to measure! They'll be in soon enough, 15 days or so right?! I think these people and their realtor are pretty nervy!

Best wishes on your move........

 

[MosMom]

Yes, our realtor advised us not to be home as well. We have a dog also so maybe that is why.

 

[Toby'sFriend]

It's my opinion that there is nothing as stressful as buying and selling a home. If it is truly too much of a hassle right now for you to let them in to measure, then don't do it. Just ask your realtor to call and politely tell their realtor that it is too much of a hassle and they will need to do their measuring during the final walk through.

Also, you are well within your rights to decide that you only want to communicate with these people by using your Realtor as a go between. That is what you are paying the Realtors for - so let them do their jobs. I've had a few of those deals where the Realtor kept trying to negotiate on points and other "seller paid" items in order not to effect commission. It is frustrating.

Deep breaths and don't let any of it upset you too much. Just keep telling yourself that it will all make a great story some day.

 

[RUDisney]

I always thought you were supposed to leave to avoid questions from potential buyers and because fewer bodies in a room makes the house look bigger. Oh, and you're supposed to boil cinnamon or bake cookies before you leave.

 

[TRAPPED-PARENT]

I've sold two homes and having learned on the first did the second differently ... much smoother.

I would never sell FHA or VA again!!!! The seller gets absolutely screwed. They not only want you to lower the price but then want you to paint, rewire, etc, etc, etc.

Also, make sure that you have put in the sales agreement that the buyer will pay for any assessments that may come up between the time of agreement to sell and the sale. Because the buyers poked around about returning the paperwork (not on purpose), I got stuck with a new assessment for sewer!!!! Of course, I was the first one this had ever happened to!!!! I was 22 years old and found this out at the closing! Yes, I cried and called my father who agreed to loan me the additional money that I was counting on for my new house .... I just wanted to get the stinking deal done!!!

When I sold my second home, I stated that I wanted a straight cash deal (the buyers, of course, took a mortgage) and would NOT mess with FHA or VA. First people through bought it. No problems - end of story.

 

[aahmom1]

I wouldn't leave so that they could measure the windows, in fact I would have laughed.

 

[BonnieA]

Belle0101:

You don't have to leave the house anymore. It's sold!!! Let them come in while you are there, let them measure and let them move the boxes. In fact, I would make sure I stay there while they are doing that.
You just pack and get ready for your new house.
I won't bore you with all my house moving tales of terror but I will tell you one thing. I will NEVER buy another brand new house. The contractor was/is an a**hole.

 

[Nancy]

When we sold our house we were never asked to leave. All they wanted was for the dog to be either outside or confined to one room.
When I was looking at houses the owners were always there except on open house days.
we bought our first house FHA which works out good if you are the buyer...it was a very old home and that's why we went FHA.
2nd house is a conventional mortgage. I didn't measure for curtains until we closed on the house and it was ours.
We actually bought the second house from wonderful people..the place was spotless when we moved in, they left us a very nice note and all the info on the furnance and water heater.
They left all the drapes in the living and dining rooms...even though they didn't have to.
16 years ater, we're still in the house...but I'm ready to move!

I just don't want to go through all through it all again.

 

[CarolA]

I think I will call my realtor and tell her that she is wonderful.

I was advised not to be home when the house is being shown. However, I was there once. Personally it made me VERY uncomfortable to have homeowners there when I was looking at houses. I actually never seriously considered one where people were there and I think it might be because I was uncomfortable discussing things I saw right then with my realtor.

My sale was a breeze and the owners did not even see the house until the day before (their son picked it out. I was very worried about that!)

Plus, my realtor has continued to fight with the builder on the new house and has gotten me a whole new driveway. (This woman is a bulldog!!)

I agree that ALL contact between the buyer and seller should be thur the agents. I never spoke to the original owner of my first house and did not meet or speak to the new owners until the closing.

 

[beccab]

when we were selling our home, we specified 24hr notice to show our home and no key to the realator. We were not asked to leave either although we did not have a dog at the time.

What really bothered me about you your story, if i read it right, was the buyers realtor kept calling you w/questions, comments ect. It was my understanding that the buyer's realtor goes thru you realator at all times. Also, our realtor was with the other one on any showing.

When we were in the process of purchasing our new home the other realtor called us when she knew our realtor was away for the weekend & was pumping us with financial questions (we were pre approved for much more than we were paying) I got the impression she didnt think we would come thru with the financing. I answered some questions to be polite but then finally told her to talk to my realtor. It still bugs me to this day. I wish I had cut her off right away & not answered any questions.

The people we were buying from were very uncooperative & made things very difficult. Funny thing is the woman turned out to be one of my best friends from grammar school (our childhood friendship did not end on friendly terms).

 

[tnkrbell]

We are going though this right now also!
It is a very stressful time. We were very lucky our hoime was only on the market two days and we got a buyer. (second couple to look at the house!)
But I would leave with our dog (he is big and mean!!) Just walk the neighboorhood ect..
We have a great relationship with the buyers!They are actually buying alot of my stuff. I actually told her to feel free to call me if she would like to come over and match colors(she is leaving it the colors I have painted it!)
I know how I am about wanting to go in my new home.
I dont mind at all!! THey are really nice people.
They are awesome they are letting us rent from them after closing till our home is available. I guess it is all in the individual who is sellignt eh property.
Good luck to you guys and congrats on the sale.

 

[Rock'n Robin]

Here was our realtor's take on our pets--some people will not buy homes that have had pets in them. Of course I think it's obvious if a pet is in the home, but sometimes a buyer will see the dog and think "Oh no, they have a dog!" Cats are worse since sometimes you can't get certain cat smells out of carpets, etc. Even if your own cats don't do that, some people have associations with it and won't buy.
We used our realtor for this house, and when we bought the house before. We loved her. If we ever buy another house (please God, not another one) we will use her again.
The first time we used her I moved my cats to my mom's house for a month. Last time I just left them there and had no trouble. But the first time the litterbox was on the first floor (no basement) and would have discouraged people, whereas the last time we had a basement and it was hidden away.
Whenever we had a showing we left and took the dog too. If you are desperate to sell, everything helps. I had a part=time realty license (for a year between DD#1 and DD#2). One time I showed a house in wintertime and the family stayed, which I could understand--but one upstairs bedroom had a HUGE pile of dog poop in the middle of the floor! They didn't buy that one!
As for measuring curtains, etc., that can wait. We've been here 5 years and all of the curtains except the kids rooms are the previous owners' (although I plan to change that when I get some extra $$$). As you said, you are busy packing, etc. and she can darn well wait.
Robin M.

 

[sharbear]

I think the answer is clear, don't talk to the other realtor anymore. Tell her to call your realtor and don't give into her antics. The other couple will be in the house soon enough and they can measure to their hearts content. These stories remind me of the horror of selling our house. I hope to never sell a house again. Our house is too small but I'll never sell because I never want to deal with realtors or other buyers ever again! I don't know why but I found it to be terrible on my self-esteem. Good luck and hope you get out of your house soon and into your new house. I've found that people want a perfect house for no money and will ask for everything and just be jerks. Not that I'm bitter or anything!!

 

[AllyandJack]

As the recent buyer of a home, I can't imagine the nerve of someone asking to go into a house to measure windows! My home is new - the builder built it and I bought it, which is apparently different from me actually taking out a construction loan and doing it myself. Whatever....I got a brand new house, that's all I cared about.

Anyway, I didn't set foot in that house until the final walk-through and I never asked to. I was BUYING the house, so I figured I had more than enough time to measure things. That is some nerve.

I also didn't ask the seller/builder to pay for anything like closing costs, insurance or inspections! The only I did ask for was that he extend the warranty for 10 years instead of 1. I mean, if you won't guarantee that my house will be standing for 10 years, I shouldn't be buying it!!

By the way, my husband and I went FHA. People think FHA is for people who can't afford to buy a house the normal way, but the truth is we were paying for our own wedding in WDW, I just got out of law school and hadn't started working yet since I was studying for the Bar Exam. My husband was supporting us and paying for the Disney wedding on his own and the FHA program allowed us to only have to put down 3% on our house so we could own our home AND have our wedding AND pay all of our bills. I didn't have a problem with FHA. I paid full asking price for the house and the only thing they did that was odd was ask for a pest inspection. It's a brand new house, so we weren't sure what they were looking for, but we did it anyway and, if you have nothing to hide, what do you care? They didn't expect anything extra from the builder of the house - in fact, we specifically asked that the builder NOT paint the interior of the house so we could do it. It might not have been FHA, but the LENDER that was the problem. Our lender wanted a water test - paid for by us - for the well that was just drilled and test a month prior. They put us through hell for 90 days - yes 90 DAYS. It had nothing to do with the FHA program...it was the lender.

The point is...don't shut out FHA buyers. My husband and I make a high 6 figure salary, but we wanted to own a home at a time when it was less convenient to come up with 20% down. FHA let us buy our dream home that we got to build ourselves, have a great wedding in WDW and buy lots of stuff from the Disney at Home store. I don't know about VA, so I can't comment on that program, but FHA worked for us and the builder had no problems from them regarding price or condition of the house. We were also really nice buyers who paid for our closing costs and other things and didn't harass the seller.