Question for married women whose spouse works...

[Minnesota!]

Full time working mom, here. It works better for us. I think DS gets more out of being in daycare center than he ever would being at home with me. I have no patience :O)

 

[KelNottAt]

I work fulltime outside the home. I have since before the kids were born.

I have great hours: 6:30 am - 3:30 pm. I get home at 4:00, so the kids are only alone for 30 minutes. (DH covers their morning routines.)

 

[rparmfamily]

I work PT, one or two evenings a week and one day on the weekend. Just enough for some extra cash but I still get to do the SAHM thing during the day w/the kids. They are both going to be in school this year. I just started working this past year, before that I was a SAHM for 4 yrs. My favorite job!

 

[jennyl772003]

I work full time.

I hear ya about the school scheduling things! Christmas programs at 9 am. They decided to start a "support group" for parents with special needs kids, but they had it start at 4. There was no way I could make that. I just couldn't believe that NONE of the parents worked!

This year they got a new principal. He seems more grounded in the real world. Spring program was at 5. They had a Muffins for Mom's and a Donuts for Dad's that were right before school in the morning.

 

[miss missy]

We both work FT, different shifts. It stinks to not see my family all week but no part time at my job.

 

[minkydog]

The reason so many kids' activities take place during the day is that the mom's organizing them have the time to do it then. I work part-time( evenings mostly). I have always been in the thick of planning some activity or another, but only during the daytime. That's when I could serve and when i most needed my kids to have their activities. I invite their friends and it would be me & 6-8 kids doing library outings, water play, crafts, cooking school,outdoor camps and picnics between the hours of 9am and 4pm, because in the evening I don't like to have other things vying for my attention. After 6pm, I'm either working or enjoying my quiet home with my DH & kids.

If you want evening activities for the kiddies, you have to organize them yourself

 

[NAB]

I am lucky I can stay home with my kids. Mind you I miss adult conversation sometimes. My husband works shift work so it is nice we can go out during the week with the kids and stay away from stores etc. on weekends. And go on vacations and not worry one can't get off.

I do give props to the mothers that have to juggle it all.

 

[NMAmy]

If you want evening activities for the kiddies, you have to organize them yourself

In my case, since I'm not actually qualified to be a high school basketball coach, it's not really an option for me to organize those activities in the evening.

School programs, plays, concerts, and such are not usually organized by moms but by teachers (at least they always were at the schools my dd attended.) As she got older, more and more of these programs were scheduled for evenings when working parents could attend but I do remember having to take time off work to go to daytime things when she was in kindergarten and in the younger grades.

 

[aunt kelly]

I work about 28 hours per week. I'm lucky because my job is pretty flexible-I can either take annual leave or rearrange my work schedule when necessary to attend school events. My daughter's school has almost all activities in the morning. Her school music program was at 10am. How inconvient for working parents! It's frustrating, to say the least, but at least my job is flexible. I really feel for the parents who cannot get away in the middle of the morning to attend school events.

My son's school has more events at night, so most parents have no trouble attending.

 

[Aimeedyan]

Yes, I work FT and I'm the breadwinner. Even if I wasn't, I would still be working - I work in a field that gives me joy and I worked hard to get into it. I have no desire to turn on that now =)

I will continue to work when we have children, don't see a need not to especially since my work is quite flexible and my children will be able to be with me a lot.

 

[lindakmonty]

I work full time 75 miles from home, so I'm gone minimum 12 hrs a day. Thankfully they're very flexible and I can take off whenever I want. They do understand if I'm late due to traffic accidents or I have to do something for ds. I can work from home sometimes... I only worked 3 days a week when he was born until he was 3. I pay average $100 a week in gas! DH wants me to quit and go to school for what I really want... nurse practitioner.. that would be great but we'll see. I'm so spoiled here

 

[DMickey28]

I currently work full time outside the house. I have on two seperate occassions been a SAHW for about four months each time. It was ok! But I like the things we are able to do with my salary too. Once we have kids the plan is for me to be a SAHM. Once DH's is up and running with his new job and a baby is on the way, it's not worth it for me to work with the cost of daycare, juggling scheduels, cost of dinner's and lunch out b/c I'm too tired to cook as well as the increase in taxes. I would end up bringing home about $400 a month so that's not worth it to us.

Once the kids get older, I'd like to do something part time. If I could with the field that I am in that'd be great, otherwise I will probably go back to teach Swim Lessons and stuff like that. I also want to be a writer, so I'll work on that!

 

[Alice28]

SAHM here. I did work 32 hours a week until my oldest was 5. That was hard sometimes, juggling the daycare schedule and making sure DH could pick the boys up on time. I was able to quit in summer 2003.

I think it's split in my area, of SAHMs and working moms. There are actually quite a bit of activites in the late afternoon and evening hours (swim lessons, etc). But a lot of things, like story hour at the library, are in the AM.

Since I've done both, I can say that both have their perks, and both have their drawbacks. This fall my middle child will be in kindergarten, but the youngest is still only 1, so I imagine it will be awhile before I jump back into the work force. I was asked by my son's preschool teacher if I would consider being her sub this next school year. I said sure, since child development/teaching was my so-called career before kids....I doubt it will be more than 8-10 days next school year, but she said a lot of it will be in November, so Christmas shopping $$ for me! Plus it will get my foot in the door with the school district, so if I want a part-time job at the school my kids go to when youngest is in grade school, I will already be employed by the schools. (the preschool is run by the community schools, a branch of the school district).

 

[Dopey Sharon]

When my kids were little, I didn't work. Well, a part-time job here and there around the holidays, at night, my DH took care of them.

When they both started school, I worked part-time in a video store during the day...was home before they got home.

When my youngest started 5th grade, I became a lunch lady. The hours were great, the pay pretty good, great benefits and I have the summer off.

That was back in 1992. My kids have long finished school, and I'm still a lunch lady. I love it! Today is my first day of summer vacation!

 

[CheshireVal]

Yes, I work. We don't have kids yet, but while I wouldn't mind taking a year off for a newborn, I don't think I could ever let myself surrender my own job to rely on my husband for support.

My mom did that, and when my parents unexpectedly divorced after 22 years of marriage, she found herself looking for a job again after having been a housewife for about 16 years. It was not easy on her, and I swore then that I would always be self-reliant. You just never know.

 

[hellokitty86]

I don't work, and I don't have kids yet. We are going to start trying soon though..

I actually hate it. I don't think most people get how hard it can be to stay at home alone all the time- I don't drive so it really sucks, and my husband works about an hour and a half away so I'm home alone every day from about 7:30-6:30.

I'm on the disboards alot

 

[MamaLema]

In my whole town almost, it seems like me and 2 other women work.

In our community it's the opposite. I'm a SAHM and I only know of a few others. Most are working moms.

 

[caitycaity]

i do work full-time outside the house. we don't have kids. i enjoy my career and intend to continue pursuing it after we have children.

my mom was the only mom who worked outside the home in the neighborhood i grew up in and i think it was really hard for her for the same reasons you mentioned.

 

[minkydog]

In my case, since I'm not actually qualified to be a high school basketball coach, it's not really an option for me to organize those activities in the evening.

Well, I'm not a certified chef, tailor, biker or goat farmer but I managed to have my children study with those who are You don't personally have to do the coaching. If YOU have a need, I bet others have that need. Get out and beat the bushes to fill that need! You don't have to run the program, just find the right people and get it set up. Don't wait for "somebody else" to do it!

 

[luckywife]

SAHM here