Question about nursing homes and birthdays

[lisajl]

Hi!

Some of you know my mom is in a nursing home. She has only been there since January and my sister and I are still learning what is going on there.
We were wondering if anyone here that has a loved one in a nursing home has taken cake in for their loved ones birthday, or had a little party for them.

Our mom will be 86 and has Alzheimers. She still knows us, but it gets worse every week, probably more like everyday.
We want to make sure the day has some happiness in it....btw, it's my birthday, too. Mom and I celebrated it together when I was little and started up again when I moved back to my hometown 12 years ago.

Not sure what to do...
Does anyone have any suggestions? We are planning to talk to the home, also.

Thanks so much..
Lisa

 

[pearlieq]

My grandma's home actually has a room off of their dining wing with a big table that families can reserve for parties.

We had my grandma's last birthday there. We brought in lunch and cake, and she invited one of her friends. It was lots of fun.

If at all possible, I would really encourage you to do it! Anything to break up the routine seems to cause huge excitement!!!

 

[shoes99]

I took baloons and a cake when my Mom was in a nursing home. If you share the cake, make sure the residents are not on a sugar free diet. I also took in some sugar free cookies and soft sugar free candies. I also left a box of candy at the nurses station.

 

[Evil Genius]

You might want to speak with someone at the home before you plan anything. Alot of places let you bring things in, some frown on it.

Happy birthday to both you and your mom.

 

[lisajl]

Thanks for the replies. Yes, we are going to talk to the nursing home, defiantely. We don't want to put anyone out about it.
It bothers me a bit because my mom does not want to leave her room. If she does she's looking to sprint away from me to go back!
She stops every nurse to see if she has to go back. It's very sad.
I'm sure the nurses will let me know if they have any problems, right?

L

 

[TheDisneyTraveler06]

Sorry to hear about your mom.

All these previous posts have wonderful suggestions! Possibly bring in a couple of balloons, a cake, and invite some family and/or some of her friends or others from the nursing home and celebrate.

Hope you and your mom both have a terrific birthday!

 

[clh2]

Just throwing in another idea - if there are too many people on restricted diets~maybe the nursing home nutritional office could prepare a dessert to serve instead of you bringing something!

 

[Hannathy]

Since Alzheimers pts have very poor short term memory but often retain long term memories try bringing in some pictures from when you celebrated your birthdays together as a child. She may just recognize the occassion that way.Try to have the same kind of cake if possible. It doesn't surprise me that she wants to return to her room all the time they tend to get very upset if things are changed. Good luck and I hope it is a good day and she can realize it is her birthday although she may think you are 12 yrs old. Also try to go at her best time of the day, ask her CNA's if you are not sure.

I would ask the the home about including others because if she is on an alzheimers wing ,many may have swallowing problems, but perhaps you could sing happy birthday and have ice cream or just sing.

It is very hard to watch this terrible disease affect someone you love, I know.

 

[TheDisneyTraveler06]

Just throwing in another idea - if there are too many people on restricted diets~maybe the nursing home nutritional office could prepare a dessert to serve instead of you bringing something!

That's a great idea!

 

[Sal]

My Grandma has been in two nursing homes and they both were very happy to help us celebrate. Of course, you want to check on this home's preferences, but I bet they have a place where you can go for a little party. The home we visit now will bring out small cups of ice cream to guests, so we bring a cake, cupcakes or even cookies.

My grandma also has memory problems, but she loves pictures. We take a big stack and go throught them one by one. We tell her about the picture and sometimes we can go through the stack several times because she has already forgotten the first time around! Like someone mentioned, though, she has great memories of years past. Pictures or stories of those times would be good. My grandma loves presents. Since she has very little room, we wrap all the things we would be bringing her anyway. Socks, underwear, little kleenex packages, crackers, etc. We take her presents even when it is not her birthday!


If you take pictures of her party, you can show them to her on future visits.
If you have treats to share, remember the nurses and aides. They do what I think is a tough, tough job. We have yet to see one who was not super good with my grandma.

Happy Birthday to both you and your mom!

Sal