Quarantine and chill and kindness chatty clubhouse: Jump in and join the conversation! All is welcome!

[lynxstch]

Lynn Thinking of you and hope you can find some calm and peace. It sounds like alot going on right now.

There is, thank you!

 

[flyingdumbo127]

Happy Sunday friends from chilly LA,

I sure have been extra thankful to God for safe and warm enough shelter and cozy bed at night. I love my jersey sheets! I sure do enjoy morning hot chocolate, too. Wish it were healthier but it sure is tasty. I do know the small amount (7 ounces or so) made with milk I do drink isn't all that bad for me.

Dad will soon be headed to Target and possibly Big 5 as well. He needs new rain boots--light weight hiking boots or sturdier athletic shoes. He also could use a new sweatshirt which I might end up getting him one more of for his birthday. I'm still figuring out what I want to get him as a birthday present. I did customize this plate yesterday, considering getting him that or possibly saving it until Father's Day or later in the year. Always great to have options

I’m glad you enjoyed yoursoup, Easyas. Dad and I sure appreciate warm soup all the more right now during colder weather. Continuing foster pup new home prayers.

Carol, excited for you as your HI plans continue to take shape. I pray you and have a wonderful trip! Thank you for setting up yesterday for Communion today. As always, I am looking forward to watching online worship.

Big AuntieMe3, I’m sure sorry your hear about your headaches. Prayers for comfort to you and resolution of them! Dolly is precious, what a cute picture.

PollyannaMom and Kirby, Sunday extra that all is brighter in both of your households today!

Well said, Pea. Dogs like anyone need to feel at home and a sense of peace of place in it. Thank you again for the loving life you give to both Grady and Toto. Prayers for your patient’s health and always to you.

What a great real estate agent, dear Snowysmom! God Bless her and how grateful I am that God brought her into your life. I am so thankful to read that you feel more at peace this morning. Please do bundle up and stay warm!

Lynn, just an extra

Sunday hug to each of you. I will check back in later.

 

[Breezy_Carol]

Good afternoon.

I survived church. I gave an announcement about the Bible study I attend. I am not comfortable with public speaking but did it anyway in all 3 services. Also set up and clean up all the communion services. Jack and I went out for a bagel and to the Dollar Tree in between services.

Now watching the Ravens get creamed.

Must work on putting Christmas away.

@AuntieMe3 Dolly is a very good looking dog.

Hope everyone in a funk or feeling poorly feels better. I don't usually preach religion but today's service for Epiphany really had me wanting to share God's light into your lives.

Have a good afterenoon.

 

[flyingdumbo127]

Carol, you were great! I am so not a fan either of public speaking, no thanks! Thank you so much for your invitation to Bible study. more people will join. You know I would if I lived out there! I enjoyed today's worship service and want to share a beautiful song of hope with all of our Quacker family that was sung today. Welcome To Our World by Chris Rice. This song of praise also went perfectly with today's Scripture in Jesus Calling, Now may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, that you may abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. (Romans 15:13 NKJV) How blessed we are by God's Presence with us always.

Extra hug and peace to each of dear you this day and always with love.

 

[Kirby]

I wasn't sure whether to "like" this post because maybe she'll get more complete answers, or "" it that court date was put off again. It must be so frustrating for her, and for you.

That's okay. At least in this case we know for sure that her ex has to do something because the attorneys came to an agreement outside of court. Just exactly what is what DD is waiting to see.

I told the realtor that for some reason I am concerned about what my neighbors think of my selling so soon after buying. She did tell meit was not their business but one guy down the hall I know will say something. He is very blunt. She wanted to get me to laugh so she told me to tell him that I met a nice looking young man who wants me to move into his lovely home with him. She did have me laughing at that. I may just tell him that! LOL!

 

[easyas123]

Then the five of us went to dinner at The Old Stein Inn, a German restaurant

This place is on my 'list' so -to-speak, I hope we get a chance to get there something in the next few months.

I shared on my Facebook page and said that Henry was in Centreville.

Thank you so much, I really appreciate it!

I shared too and added one of your recent pics...they should use one of you more recent pics on his info page.

Thank you!

Haven't posted much because I'm still in my grumpiness.

I feel you on this, we are feeling a bit out of sorts as well. I hope you can come to a centered place soon.

A Hawaii trip sounds so exciting!

It does! On our trip in November we had cocktails a few times with some ladies who had traveled over from Hawaii They were trying to get us to come over there! I think we have been tempted!

I had a good meeting with the real estate agent. She really does her homework.

Excellent to hear, your words read like someone who is very satisfied with the decision they've made.

It is interesting that I do feel a bit lighter, like I may be able to find the place to soothe my heart and soul and get a new start. I tell Chris he needs to come with me. I hope and pray that I can find the right place in the right neighborhood.

I think you will! I feel like you are on the right path, for what it's worth!

McCormick Baja Citrus marinade

Oh - I like that one, let us know how it turns out!

Just exactly what is what DD is waiting to see.

I have my fingers & toes crossed for her that she finds out soon!


Ugh - busy day after all. First off and most important, we caught up w/ some close family members for a meal and hanging out today. So good to see them. Then we went to the mall and had excellent luck in finding a decent new suit for my husband - he needed one, for "in case" and our sons wedding. Glad that worked out easily enough.

Home now, had a cocktail and a soak in the hot tub to help my back - I tweaked it somehow yesterday - it's in my lower shoulder and it I keep aggravating it. Got some Aleve and some SalonPas roll on on the way home. Hope it helps.

Dinner tonight was whatever - husband made himself a chef salad and I am grazing among the leftovers.

 

[flyingdumbo127]

Kirby.

Easyas, for extra family time. I am sorry you had a busier than expected day though.

Have any of you used packing foam sheets? I'm wondering if it is easier to cut with a scissors than bubble wrap which is just awful to work with longer term. I asked this, I'm sure in the past, but how do each of you wrap up your Nativity figurines? I was going to use bubble wrap again until I realized that would take forever. Paper towels well-padded worked just as well and much quicker. It was also easier to place the Holy Family on top and last. I, of course, saved the Baby Jesus figurine for last and placed in an extra bag for added care and respect.

Wishing all of you a good night with sweet dreams.

 

[Judique]

Ugh....first world problems. I did some sorting, cleaning and rearranging today.

Went to my room and took a nap, after reading for a few minutes on my laptop.

Somehow I drifted off sitting straight up with laptop on my lap.

Woke up to a thud and a cracked screen. It still works but was changing pages all by itself.

Went back to sleep until dinner was ready. Hello Fresh porkchop and brussels sprouts with mashed potatoes.

After dinner DD said she would disable my touchscreen to see if that will help.

Meanwhile I'm trying to type on this old albatross of DD's - it's so huge, works fine but has no backlight, no touchscreen.

My laptop is a 13.3 inch about 6-7 years old but its an Evo 360 HP i7 with lots of power and storage and features.

But mostly it's small! Without going to a tablet or chromebook it's really difficult to find this size with all the features.

I actually bought and returned a laptop a month or two ago because it had another problem but it got fixed. I don't think the screen is going to get fixed.

 

[Breezy_Carol]

Just a little good night bump.

 

[frog3101]

Good evening fellow Quackers.

@Kirby I hope that whatever your daughter finds out is news that will bring the kids, your daughter, and you some peace. I'm curious, how does it work when the attorneys agree out of court? Did your daughter and the kids father agree to let the attorneys come to some sort of an agreement, with out your daughter or former son-in-laws input? Sorry if that is a silly question, I'm am really curious. I would love to just let me attorney and his work it out and us to stay out of it for the most part, but I'm not really sure that is how it works or even could. Maybe it depends on the state.

@Breezy_Carol Sounds like you had a full church day. Hope you are able to relax a bit tomorrow.

@Judique Hope you can get something figured out with the laptop or find a replacement that you like just as well.

@easyas123 I also am not on social media of any sort...this is as close as I get...but I sure hope that sweetie of a pup finds a home soon. I'm sure you will keep us posted.

@AuntieMe3 and @lynxstch Sending you both happy thoughts and prayers that you both can get out of the funks you have been in. I agree with others, this time of year is really difficult sometimes when it comes to emotions and mood.

@Snowysmom I am glad to hear your meeting with the agent went well and you are even feeling a bit of peace and hope!

I am supposed to meet with my attorney this week. I hope it all pans out and it does not get rescheduled again...can't remember if I posted that our meeting for the week between Christmas and New Years was cancelled because she was ill. I have a million things I want to ask her and I am praying she can calm my nerves some. My dad is supposed to go with me in helping to keep me focused and to be a second set of ears and give his advice on what we will be putting on the table for an offer. I probably have mentioned this before and it is probably silly to say, but my biggest fear is having to go to court. I know it sounds silly to say, since who in their right mind wants to go to court, but I am absolutely terrified of that happening. I have no idea how I would even make it though a trial both emotionally and financially. I am starting to wear down though and my friends keep telling me this is when I have to "dig deep". I am exhausted from all of this. I am honestly tired of just surviving and living through all the "firsts" and checking them off the list just to have to look at the next thing I have to survive and check off the list. I want to start moving on, yet I know deep down until I know how this is all going to play out legally and what is going to happen with the kids, I don't think I will really be able to focus on going forward. If any of you who have been through this, how long did it take you to feel like you were really ready to move forward? I know all situations are different, but I'm just curious. FH continues to drop the kids off late and it's driving me nuts. It's not that late, usually 10-20 minutes, and I don't want to be the parent that argues over that much of a small amount of time, but he is consistently doing it and it makes me nuts cause he just is so arrogant. I do have it documented and always let my attorney know. He also continues to speak to the kids about coming over extra before he even mentions it to me. He has also thrown a major curve ball with my oldest, which has set her into a bit of a tailspin.

My oldest and I did try to do a bit of meal planning for the upcoming week, so we shall see how that goes. Either food costs still going up and up, I am trying to find ways to cut back and not just tossing stuff in to the cart with no real plan seems like a good place to start.

By the time a lot of you read this it will be Monday, so I'm just going to say, happy Monday to all.

 

[Snowysmom]

@frog3101 So sorry things are so tough for you and the family. I truly hope you can meet with your attorney and get you r questions answered so you can have a sense of what will happen. So glad your father is going with you. A second set of ears is a good thing. I am coming from a different place with grief, stress, and sadness but I agree, the firsts are hard and seeing what is coming next is hard too. It is a one day, one minute at a time thing. But, you do need to feel your emotions and let them be sometimes. And also be sure to take care of you. I like the idea of meal planning with your daughter. It will help you two be close and save money on groceries too. A win win. FH is just trying to get to you and see what he can get away with. Keep noting what he does, how he is late dropping the kids off even if it is only 20 minutes. It is all important for the you and the kids.

@Judique Sorry about your laptop. It is frustrating. I hope you can find a good solution.

Lynn Thinking of you and hoping you are taking care of yourself.

Good morning. It is in the twenties here this morning. I was at Kenny's house yesterday. He is getting stressed about his divorce. Today he is having his house appraised. He hopes he does not have to sell it. I can see the stress in him and wish I could help him more. He wants to be able to keep the house as the kids are used to it and he wants them in a familiar place when they stay with him. My heart just hurts for him. I am thankful that he has a good job, is a good Dad and son, and tries to do what is the best for him and his kids.

I am getting anxious about this move. I can't believe my condo will be on the market at the end of next week. My gut tells me this is the right thing to do but I get so stressed about finding a place to live that is my place. I don't want to have to put my stuff in storage. I want to go from here to a new place. I think my stress is off the charts lately between grief, life stress, Kenny's issues, and moving. Thankfully the agent I have is very proactive and confident. I know the day I go into work every week will be a long commute but I am willing to do it to be in the right place to live. I have a 10 minute commute now but it will go to an hour when I move to the area I want to go to. I don't mind if it is the right place.

No more rambling. If you got this far, thanks for reading. Off to work. Have a good day.

 

[Breezy_Carol]

Good morning.

Didn't sleep well so up early. Nothing on the plan for the day except taking the Christmas tree down. The rest of the decorations that I'm not leaving up for winter are all boxed and some to the attic already.

I have no words of wisdom on the divorce situation as I have not been there,

I am sure I'll be back later.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

Good Monday morning! Yes, 29 degrees here and calling for flurries. Ugh. I did drive through some flurries the other day on the way to work, too, but they were fleeting. Yesterday was sunny and nice despite the cold, and I managed to enjoy some sun on my face while out with the dogs. We also did a little whirlwind cleaning and straightening out of the house in the morning and that felt good. I put out some of my new Valentine’s and St Patrick’s Day things on my corner shelf, and they’re cute (though I have some Thanksgiving and Christmas things sitting on the table that still need to be put away). Now I need to get my Jelly Bean Yankee Candle for this time of year. Ordered it.

Frog, hugs. I understand how hard it must be for you right now. I was my sister’s main support during her divorce, as I mentioned before. I lived it with her, and it was very rough, too. Much of it went on for a long time because of the issues with the kids even after the divorce was finalized, unfortunately. But they got through it and life moved on. All are relatively happy and pretty well adjusted now. (Kids in their 30s.) It’s good to talk about your feelings. We’re always here. Stay confident, even if you don’t feel that way. Present yourself that way to the world, especially to the FH.

Snowysmom, I think you just take one day at a time, as you are doing, and try to care for yourself as best you can. Be good to yourself. If there’s a way to eek out some meditation time every day the endorphins from that will stay with you for hours. I’m glad you enjoy your walks and your quiet time of reflection. It’s hard when the anxiety sets in, but if you try to stay focused on relaxation, it can still help. (I always put myself at my favorite vacation place mentally, and try to stay there.) Whatever you do that makes you happy and calm, do it. (As long as it’s healthy, lol.)

You too, Lynn. Is your husband doing ok? Sometimes after the holidays people can build up a little fluid. Hope you are feeling better.

Thinking of dazed and hoping she’s doing ok. And Kirby’s son.

I heard from an old friend last week, I’d missed her voicemail. She has newly diagnosed cancer, two types. She was one of my main supports during my cancer experience so I’m happy to be able to be there for her now. We’re working on plans for breakfast or dinner, maybe this week. She’s been under a lot of stress these past few years and I was worried about her, but this was still sort of out of the blue, found incidentally. We have to watch our stress levels! I had that course with Dr Herbert Benson, the Father of Mind-Body Medicine, and stress build up can put us over into a disease state if we’re predisposed. I try to keep this in mind myself, but thought I would share here, also, since so many of us are having stress issues. I think this week I am going to pull out my Wellness Book. Dr Benson helped write it. I recommend picking up a copy if you don’t have it and keeping it as a reference. There’s a lot in there we can use.



I went looking for my elderly friend without much luck. Spoke to some of her neighbors and left a message for her family in her mailbox, as recommended by one. I hope they call me. When I introduced myself to the neighbor she said she knew who I was from seeing me going over there (thankfully). Several people didn’t answer their doors, so it felt a little weird at first, and I didn’t think I’d actually get to talk to anyone. But this particular neighbor was a chatterbox, lol. I feel so bad my friend thinks I don’t know what happened to her.

Well DS is off today and just took the dogs out. It is now snowing pretty hard. I wonder what Grady thinks of it?

My plan today is to start cleaning my bedroom! Wish me luck and send me some motivational vibes! It’s a big job.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

I saw this article the other day and thought I’d share it. I was intrigued because it’s not usually the type of article you see on Newsweek, and I am really interested in hearing near death experiences, but this wasn’t typical of that type of experience. But it was interesting anyway. I think that her growing up a military brat and moving around so much gave her a different perspective on her experience. Anyway, see what you think.

https://www.newsweek.com/survived-near-death-now-ceo-million-dollar-company-1770836

 

[lynxstch]

Good morning. Clear and cold outside, going to 40's , same as yesterday. They had expected wintry mix overnight and had the sanding trucks out at 1 am. But we didn't get a flake or a drop of rain. I went through all of my drawers and closet, tossing unused stuff, refolding and organizing. Felt like I accomplished something at least.

Let us know how it comes out

We loved it. I have used it before, but usually I marinate it and bake it. This time I just mixed up the marinade and poured it over the chicken in the crockpot. It was good, but wasn't too spicy or hot.

You too, Lynn. Is your husband doing ok? Sometimes after the holidays people can build up a little fluid. Hope you are feeling better.

Thanks for asking. It comes and goes. He has had quite a bit of fluid build up and has taken extra lasix on a few days. He is having more and more breathing issues lately. Oxygen is running 24/7 now . He is frustrated as he's been trying to eat less and lose weight, but he has gained a few lbs. instead. It's not helping that he won't get up and move more than he does. He's glued to that recliner way too much!

Today is dusting and vacuuming, if I can get myself motivated. Also have to call Dave and ask him exactly when he's coming to measure and make a 'what we need' list for the bathroom. He usually goes to FL for a week or 2 in January, but he hasn't mentioned it yet.

Hugs to you @frog3101 . He is not being fair to you, or the kids, especially your older daughter

Have a nice day

 

[easyas123]

I saw this article the other day and thought I’d share it.

Interesting, thanks for posting that.

 

[lynxstch]

The friend who recommended I try writing just sent me this, so I thought I'd share.

 

[dazedx3]

Hello friends,

Day by Day, minute by minute… Grief is painful, real, and gut wrenching. It permeates every minute of your day. There is a palatable sadness in every moment, every feeling, every interaction, every thought. I am so lonely, even when I am with loved ones. I’ve spent so long caring for him that I don’t know what to do with my time. I worry whether he is ok, cold, pain free, tired, hungry, lonely or scared.

I know things will get better but feel like am betraying him if they do. I know this is all part of the grieving process, but that doesn’t make it better. It is so hard to come to terms with how final this is, it still feels like he will be back with us. It is hard to know how to grieve with my children, they are doing their own grieving. I am used to helping them through hard situations and now I don’t feel like I have the strength to guide them.

Sorry to unload here

 

[PollyannaMom]

No apologies needed, @dazedx3!

We are here to listen.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

Hello friends,

Day by Day, minute by minute… Grief is painful, real, and gut wrenching. It permeates every minute of your day. There is a palatable sadness in every moment, every feeling, every interaction, every thought. I am so lonely, even when I am with loved ones. I’ve spent so long caring for him that I don’t know what to do with my time. I worry whether he is ok, cold, pain free, tired, hungry, lonely or scared.

I know things will get better but feel like am betraying him if they do. I know this is all part of the grieving process, but that doesn’t make it better. It is so hard to come to terms with how final this is, it still feels like he will be back with us. It is hard to know how to grieve with my children, they are doing their own grieving. I am used to helping them through hard situations and now I don’t feel like I have the strength to guide them.

Sorry to unload here

I wish you could be inside my head with all the information I’ve garnered from reading stories about near death experiences (NDE). I took to studying them more than 20 years ago for a couple of reasons - 1) I was taking care of so many people struck with critical illness and had to sometimes counsel them on dying, often in the middle of the night after their families had gone home (because that’s when they wanted to talk about it), and 2) my own cancer experience brought me to the cusp of fearing I might die and leave my young children without me and I needed to understand it because that’s how I am. Probably weird for most people, but for me, as you guys know, this is how my life is.

The first thing to know is that there are ten or fifteen elements that are very common to most NDEs; in other words, despite people having varied and different experiences, all over the world and throughout the ages, their stories usually contain at least some elements very similar to everyone else’s stories, independent of one another. They’ve even found drawings in caves that depict some of these things. And most people who have them hadn’t “studied them” beforehand. They just happen from time to time, and people‘s lives are often profoundly changed by them. Why? Because they experience things that are so beautiful, and so incredible, and so moving, that there oftentimes aren’t even words to describe what they’ve experienced. It’s given us a small glimpse into what it’s like to die. Personally, because of this, I am not afraid to die. In fact, I sort of welcome it. But not for a while yet. People who’ve had NDE often say the same thing - they were oftentimes disappointed to “come back” to this life and sometimes begged not to have to leave where they were. But usually they learned some things that changed how they view life so they consider it a gift.

Pain is gone. Pain sometimes even goes before people die, as they’ve told us. There is no fear, either. Almost right away people have been greeted by others that are familiar to them. It may not always be someone they’ve known in this life, but it could be a soul mate (like a guardian angel) that was with them in this life all along, but they never knew about them here. (That’s why it’s nice to be open to these things.) Sometimes it’s a group. I’ve even seen cases where it’s a pet. There are no bodies and no voices, it’s all telepathic: they can hear eachothers thoughts and there is great communication. Everything is explained. There is usually a life review but not in a judgmental way. And very often people meet up with deceased loved ones. The feeling is so pleasant it’s hard to describe. Same with the colors and sights and sounds, unlike anything we know here. Often people are shown the meanings of things in their lives, and if they do come back, it’s something they can work on, or tell people about. Sometimes they are asked to do something, but it’s so sacred that most people who’ve experienced it won’t say what it is.

I could go on and on, but @Dazed, from the bottom of my heart, I believe that your husband is not alone, nor cold, nor suffering, nor hungry, lonely, or any of those things. Yes, he carries his love for you in his heart, still, and always will. And he awaits the day you join him, too. But all in time that’s meant to be, and not any sooner. Because, as he understands by now, our lives all have meaning, and we’re all on the path we’re meant to be on, with free will where we can choose our own paths as to how we live our lives, as well. I’m confident in saying he wants you to live your life as well as you can, as it’s not your time yet, though it was his. Naturally, you have to grieve your loss. But don’t feel guilty. The only way you‘ll betray him is if you don’t live your best life when you get settled. If you have a pastor to talk to, I think they’ll confirm some of these things. I also have books and videos I can recommend if anyone is interested in reading or viewing them. I feel like once I started understanding this, it really changed how I thought about death.

I hope this hasn’t crossed any lines or anything, I’m just sharing what’s in my head in the hopes that it can help you find some comfort. I don’t want to see you so worried that your husband is not in a good place. Believe me, it’s the thing that gave me comfort when I lost my Mom. She so believed in all this and we enjoyed talking about it over the years. She had some extraordinary experiences herself, too. In the weeks before she passed she kept pointing to above her TV smiling and saying how “fantastic” and “beautiful“ things were upstairs (but there was no upstairs there). She was also calling out the names of her sisters, her child, all gone, and people whose names I didn’t know, but in a good way. I knew she was connecting with things I wasn’t privy to knowing, and it gave me peace. That’s probably why I didn’t cry much after she left us. I just knew she really was where she always hoped she would be when she left this world.

I hope this helps. (And people don’t think I’m too crazy. )