Purity Balls? Yuck

[pansmermaidzlagoon]

I find it icky as well.

I think a better way to do it would be to privately sign some kind of thing between the kid (male and female) and BOTH parents - sort of like they do for driving. also, make it clear that communication is open.

the whole ball, ring, father thing is icky and archaic.

bottom line: it is really about how they have been brought up all along and if you haven't instilled those values by that age then it is probably too late and this silly ritual is pointless anyway.

 

[aprilgail2]

I've come up with this little saying years ago. And anyone is welcome to use it. "It's like trying on shoes, you don't buy the first pair without trying on others."

exactly- my friend was a virgin when she got married and the guy ended up cheating on her and they got divorced- she got remarried about 3 years later and still had only had sex with the ex- once she was remarried she was like "OMG I can't believe this is what I was missing out on" she said she thought that was how sex was supposed to be, tolerable, and didn't even realize what she was missing!

 

[ronandannette]

I find it icky as well.

I think a better way to do it would be to privately sign some kind of thing between the kid (male and female) and BOTH parents - sort of like they do for driving. also, make it clear that communication is open.

the whole ball, ring, father thing is icky and archaic.

bottom line: it is really about how they have been brought up all along and if you haven't instilled those values by that age then it is probably too late and this silly ritual is pointless anyway.

Sure, but it's VERY unlikely that anybody would want to participate in something like this if these weren't the values that had been taught and reinforced in the home all along. It really isn't a super-trendy thing people are rushing to do. There may be some peer pressure within these isolated groups to be involved but then again there's all kinds of peer pressure for kids to become more sexually active than they might be ready for in the outside world too.

 

[Gumbo4x4]

exactly- my friend was a virgin when she got married and the guy ended up cheating on her and they got divorced- she got remarried about 3 years later and still had only had sex with the ex- once she was remarried she was like "OMG I can't believe this is what I was missing out on" she said she thought that was how sex was supposed to be, tolerable, and didn't even realize what she was missing!

On the flip side, if you "don't know what you're missing", you probably won't miss it if it's not happening

 

[DawnM]

And yet buying used shoes is on the top 10 "do not buy used" list.

I've come up with this little saying years ago. And anyone is welcome to use it. "It's like trying on shoes, you don't buy the first pair without trying on others."

 

[ronandannette]

And yet buying used shoes is on the top 10 "do not buy used" list.

Good one.