Problem in education

[edwardsfire]

What the hell is a "fatherly" nature? I'm not being rude...I'd just like to know.

And I'll disagree with you.

There's no different requirement for children of heterosexual versus homosexual couples. It doesn't matter if a child has two mommies, two daddies, a mommy and a daddy, or a single parent of some sort.

Kids need a stable environment and loving home. Ideally, sure...let's say every kiddo has 2 parents.

Children can get everything they NEED from a strong, stable, loving parent.

By myself, I assure you, I am everything my child needs. I don't need a partner to parent my child. I'm perfectly capable.

Shocking, I know. But true.

Maybe you dont think your child needs a father...but how would you know?
Fathers do what father do; do you really need an explanation?
I mean, do you not understand the role of a father to a family?
I didnt say you needed a "partner", i said kids need a father.
Kids also need a mom. It goes both ways.
I wouldnt want to grow up with just a dad, moms are equally important.
BOTH parents are important.
I understand that a single parent household can fuction just fine.
But look, go talk to a social worker, ask them about homes with no daddy, see what they say. Odds are, the homes with both parents, have a more stable and healthy enviornment.
P.S. fatherly nature is what it is, its the opposite of motherly nature.
I.E. When our kids cry at night for whatever reason, they usually want mom.
When my son wants to see what makes things "work" he comes to me.
Kids goto moms for different reasons they goto dads.
They seek things from both parents for many different things.

 

[edwardsfire]

From the UK Telegraph Children living with one parent 'no worse off'

"Children who live with a single parent or a step-parent are no worse off emotionally or psychologically than children whose parents are not divorced, according to a new study.

As part of the Swedish study, researchers questioned 1,300 children aged 10 to 18.

They found that divorce was not the root of the problem, although acrimony during the breakdown of a marriage was harmful. "But in the long term we found no statistical differences between the well-being of children who lived with both their parents and those who lived with step-parents or a single parent," said Viveca Oestberg, one of the co-authors.

One study conducted by Miss Oestberg showed that one in three children complained of stomach aches and had difficulty sleeping, one in four was tense and nervous, and one in six often felt sad.

But Miss Oestberg said the wellbeing of children was more influenced by the quality of the relationships they had with the adults in their home than by whether they lived with both their parents.

The most important factor was whether children, particularly older teenagers, felt that they had a supportive family and someone they could turn to in times of need.

Children who lived in homes where conflict was rampant more frequently reported that they felt poorly."

Source: www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/1460548/Children-living-with-one-parent-no-worse-off.html

Also, the U.S. National Institutes of Health released a study called Family structure, socioeconomic status, and access to health care for children. It stated that economic status and parental education has more to do with access to things like health care then being a simply a single parent. (Source: Abstr Book Assoc Health Serv Res Meet. 1999; 16: 400.)

The US Department of Commerce Economics and Satistics Administration also released similar information. A census brief called Children with single parents - how they fare indicates that the education level of the parent and their economic status is what seems to matter when it come to the welfare of a children of single parents. Guess we better blame poor people for all the problems in our schools.

So while in general I do actually agree that it is preferable to have two involved and caring parents, I don't think children NEED this situation to be happy or successful as you seem to be repeating over and over. Having an advantage is great, but not having it doesn't spell instant doom. I also don't think the benefit of two parents living at home is realized if you have an absentee parent who ignores the child or a household that "stays together for the children" where the family is full of anger and tension.

You realize i could find a study that has the opposite findings.
We all can point to "studies" that back up our claims.
Here you go:
http://www.highbeam.com/doc/1P2-1476310.html
The story is cut short due to "subscription issues" but my point is made.

 

[Ember]

P.S. fatherly nature is what it is, its the opposite of motherly nature.
I.E. When our kids cry at night for whatever reason, they usually want mom.
When my son wants to see what makes things "work" he comes to me.
Kids goto moms for different reasons they goto dads.
They seek things from both parents for many different things.

Mothers are there to comfort and fathers are there to be smart and explain how things work?! Wow. I don't know what to say to that. What an antiquated idea about parenting not to mention grossly gender stereotyping.

Do daughters also only play with dolls and kitchen toys while the boys play with cars and guns?

I'm done here. If I want to bang my head against a wall, I'll find a nice brick one.

 

[Goofyluver]

Maybe you dont think your child needs a father...but how would you know?
Fathers do what father do; do you really need an explanation?
I mean, do you not understand the role of a father to a family?
I didnt say you needed a "partner", i said kids need a father.
Kids also need a mom. It goes both ways.
I wouldnt want to grow up with just a dad, moms are equally important.
BOTH parents are important.
I understand that a single parent household can fuction just fine.
But look, go talk to a social worker, ask them about homes with no daddy, see what they say. Odds are, the homes with both parents, have a more stable and healthy enviornment.
P.S. fatherly nature is what it is, its the opposite of motherly nature.
I.E. When our kids cry at night for whatever reason, they usually want mom.
When my son wants to see what makes things "work" he comes to me.
Kids goto moms for different reasons they goto dads.
They seek things from both parents for many different things.

A single parent is perfectly capable of caring for a child. I'm sorry if you feel incapable as a parent by yourself...I,on the other hand, do not.

Do I understand the "role" of a father to a family?

Sure. I've got one of those "father" things myself.

But, I don't subscribe to the "every family must look the same" club. Sorry.

I used the word "partner"...because that is inclusive of many families...not just your sterotypical mother/father/2.5 kids family. How many families resemble that stereotype in this world?

And "ask a social worker"? Guess I'll call up my "father" and my "mother"...who are both SW's. Hey...come to think of it...I'm getting my 2nd MS in SW. How about I just ask myself!

I also don't subscribe to your "gender roles" as you have described in your above post. "Fatherly and motherly nature" makes me giggle. It's SO retro.

 

[edwardsfire]

Mothers are there to comfort and fathers are there to be smart and explain how things work?! Wow. I don't know what to say to that. What an antiquated idea about parenting not to mention grossly gender stereotyping.

Do daughters also only play with dolls and kitchen toys while the boys play with cars and guns?

You know, actually most little boys DO play with trucks and toy tractors while girls actually DO play with dolls and play houses and stuff. You know, we actually HAVE boys and girl clothes, is that a sterotype also?
Gender sterotyping?
LOL
Its called reality.

 

[edwardsfire]

A single parent is perfectly capable of caring for a child. I'm sorry if you feel incapable as a parent by yourself...I,on the other hand, do not.

Do I understand the "role" of a father to a family?

Sure. I've got one of those "father" things myself.

But, I don't subscribe to the "every family must look the same" club. Sorry.

I used the word "partner"...because that is inclusive of many families...not just your sterotypical mother/father/2.5 kids family. How many families resemble that stereotype in this world?

And "ask a social worker"? Guess I'll call up my "father" and my "mother"...who are both SW's. Hey...come to think of it...I'm getting my 2nd MS in SW. How about I just ask myself!

I also don't subscribe to your "gender roles" as you have described in your above post. "Fatherly and motherly nature" makes me giggle. It's SO retro.

You might be suprised that most families in the world DO have a mommy and a daddy.
A large majority that dont, have negative issues-
They really do. That might disappoint you or not "fit in your world" or fit your lifestyle, but non the less, most families "look the same".
You make me out to be the intolerant one or the closed minded one.
Maybe you should look in the mirror.
Im sure im not "worldly" or socially tolerant like you, how could i be?
Im one of those fools that believe in time tested/proven traditions and institutions.
Im one of those fools that believes in values and morals.
Shame on me, i also read the bible to my kids. The horror of it.
There is such a thing as "core families" without them, we wouldnt survive as the human race.

 

[edwardsfire]

Mothers are there to comfort and fathers are there to be smart and explain how things work?! Wow. I don't know what to say to that. What an antiquated idea about parenting not to mention grossly gender stereotyping.

Do daughters also only play with dolls and kitchen toys while the boys play with cars and guns?

I'm done here. If I want to bang my head against a wall, I'll find a nice brick one.

 

[WebmasterAlex]

The biggest problem is the notion that teachers can get paid far less than other jobs because it's sort of a part time job. Everyone wants highly qualified amazing teachers for far less than other professionals with a similar level of education.
In the end they still have to pay a morgtage, buy a car, and purchase groceries.
Untill teachers are paid on par with other professionals there is nothing we can do to fix the schools

 

[Goofyluver]

You might be suprised that most families in the world DO have a mommy and a daddy.
A large majority that dont, have negative issues-
They really do. That might disappoint you or not "fit in your world" or fit your lifestyle, but non the less, most families "look the same".
You make me out to be the intolerant one or the closed minded one.
Maybe you should look in the mirror.
Im sure im not "worldly" or socially tolerant like you, how could i be?
Im one of those fools that believe in time tested/proven traditions and institutions.
Im one of those fools that believes in values and morals.
Shame on me, i also read the bible to my kids. The horror of it.
There is such a thing as "core families" without them, we wouldnt survive as the human race.

I'll tell ya' a secret. Biologically...ALL children have a "mother" and a "father".

I'm not saying that you're intolerant or closed-minded. I'm saying your VIEWS do not take into account the reality of many people's family situations.

I'll say this again, Edward.

Life happens. What you do with what you've got...THAT is the important part.

It works our for some...not so much for others.

I'm also one of those fools who believes in good strong morals and values. But, because we do not subscribe to the same train of thought, does not mean that my values (or yours for that matter) are any less moral or valuable.

Open your eyes Edward. The world is a beautiful place, filled with beautiful people and beautiful families...of all different shapes, colors, sizes, etc.

Life isn't a statistic.

 

[edwardsfire]

I'll tell ya' a secret. Biologically...ALL children have a "mother" and a "father".

I'm not saying that you're intolerant or closed-minded. I'm saying your VIEWS do not take into account the reality of many people's family situations.

I'll say this again, Edward.

Life happens. What you do with what you've got...THAT is the important part.

It works our for some...not so much for others.

I'm also one of those fools who believes in good strong morals and values. But, because we do not subscribe to the same train of thought, does not mean that my values (or yours for that matter) are any less moral or valuable.

Open your eyes Edward. The world is a beautiful place, filled with beautiful people and beautiful families...of all different shapes, colors, sizes, etc.

Life isn't a statistic.

Im saying my views make up the majority.
You sound like a pro LIFER.
but, i bet you arent....

 

[Goofyluver]

Im saying my views make up the majority.
You sound like a pro LIFER.
but, i bet you arent....

I sound like a what?

 

[lisadr]

Edward,I hope, for your childrens' sake, they never grow up to be anything except what you expect of them. I hope you DS never comes home with the love of his life-a wonderful fellow he met at work. Or you little girl never comes home pregnant, telling you she does not want to marry the father. Or any other thing you deem unworthy.

But be careful-life happens, and all that really matters is what you do about it.

 

[Goofyluver]

But be careful-life happens, and all that really matters is what you do about it.

This is what I keep saying.

 

[edwardsfire]

Edward,I hope, for your childrens' sake, they never grow up to be anything except what you expect of them. I hope you DS never comes home with the love of his life-a wonderful fellow he met at work. Or you little girl never comes home pregnant, telling you she does not want to marry the father. Or any other thing you deem unworthy.

But be careful-life happens, and all that really matters is what you do about it.

Deem unworthy?
Where did i say that?
Careful how you word things.
I only gave my feelings and opinions.
This has nothing to do concerning the love i have for my kids..no matter what.
This is about a 2 parent household.

 

[Goofyluver]

Deem unworthy?
Where did i say that?
Careful how you word things.
I only gave my feelings and opinions.
This has nothing to do concerning the love i have for my kids..no matter what.
This is about a 2 parent household.

Really?

How is you telling me I sound like a "pro-lifer" about 2 parent households?

 

[edwardsfire]

Really?

How is you telling me I sound like a "pro-lifer" about 2 parent households?

that was a subtle joke concerning your political and religious opinions.
and you knew that.
The comments towards me were no joke.

 

[Goofyluver]

that was a subtle joke concerning your political and religious opinions.
and you knew that.
The comments towards me were no joke.

I guessed I missed the joke.

And before I leave...

Pro-choice.

 

[edwardsfire]

I guessed I missed the joke.

And before I leave...

Pro-choice.

Well no poop.

 

[lisadr]

that was a subtle joke concerning your political and religious opinions.
and you knew that.
The comments towards me were no joke.

And I stand behind what I said. And I wasn't joking.

 

[edwardsfire]

And I stand behind what I said. And I wasn't joking.

Well good for you.
Im proud of ya.