Private School????

Thanks everyone!

I'm curious which school BBP thinks I'm leaning towards, because I feel like I'm on the fence.

I should also be clear that really all we're deciding now is whether or not to apply at all. The school has like a 50% acceptance rate and gives priority to Catholic applicants.

I should also say that I didn't go looking for a private school for him. For the most part I've been really impressed with our public middle school, he's done well there, has friends, seems happy. He's also got a diverse group of friends outside of school, from his old school, from his sports teams, family friends etc . . . Our adoption is also very open and he has role models in his extended family as well. I had been assuming he'd go on to high school with his friends.

This whole thing started because he and his best friend (who goes to a different middle school) attended the private school for a football camp. At the beginning the friend announced that he was going to "wow" the coaches and get a football scholarship. Well by the end of the week, the friend was no longer interested. He said there was too much "Jesus stuff" (his words, not mine), but suddenly my kid was interested. He didn't come out and ask, but he spent hours pouring over the website, looking up their teams on you tube etc . . . Finally, I asked him if he wanted to go and he said "yes, yes, yes, yes, yes". This is a kid who doesn't ever ask for anything. At Christmas he tells me he wants a "hug" or something like that. So, for him these were really strong feelings.

I don't think it's a perfect fit. Arts are really important to me, and have been great for him, and that's a significant weakness. In addition, I worry about the social studies curriculum. It's definitely his greatest strength academically and what I assume he'll study in college, and rushing through non-honors level classes in the summer is less than ideal. I also worry about the religion aspect. We are not a religious family, and while I'm fine with him being interested in religions, and figuring out whether he himself is religious, I worry that 3 years of instruction in Catholicism, plus one year of "world religions", isn't a balanced way to do that. I also wonder if taking him from a school where he sometimes feels different because only 15% of the kids look like him, and going to a school where an even smaller percentage believe what he believes, makes sense.

It's also a lot of money.

And on the other hand, I really really trust my kid's instincts and he wants this so badly, and there are things that I do think would be a better fit.

I think the school is likely a "better" fit, but not a "perfect" fit, and not by a huge margin. I will probably let him apply, but also wage a propoganda campaign in favor of our public school. It may be that he'll discover things he loves about the public option and lose interest. If he does get in, and gets significant financial aid or scholarship, then it will be his choice. If he gets in without aid, then we'll really need to think hard at that point.
 
Can you go on a tour of the school? That really solidified the decision for our son. And there is no harm in applying.
 
Can you go on a tour of the school? That really solidified the decision for our son. And there is no harm in applying.

I can't tour until September/October, but we'll definitely do that.

The application process is pretty elaborate, so if we do decide to apply he'll need to go to an open house, spend a day shadowing, write essays, take a test, go to an interview etc . . . I would rather not ask him to do all those things, and then tell him he can't go. If I'm still on the fence, or still feeling like I'll let him go if there's financial aid, then we'll apply and risk it, but if I conclude that I won't let him go no matter what, then I'd rather not apply.
 
Thanks everyone!

I'm curious which school BBP thinks I'm leaning towards, because I feel like I'm on the fence.

I should also be clear that really all we're deciding now is whether or not to apply at all. The school has like a 50% acceptance rate and gives priority to Catholic applicants.

I should also say that I didn't go looking for a private school for him. For the most part I've been really impressed with our public middle school, he's done well there, has friends, seems happy. He's also got a diverse group of friends outside of school, from his old school, from his sports teams, family friends etc . . . Our adoption is also very open and he has role models in his extended family as well. I had been assuming he'd go on to high school with his friends.

This whole thing started because he and his best friend (who goes to a different middle school) attended the private school for a football camp. At the beginning the friend announced that he was going to "wow" the coaches and get a football scholarship. Well by the end of the week, the friend was no longer interested. He said there was too much "Jesus stuff" (his words, not mine), but suddenly my kid was interested. He didn't come out and ask, but he spent hours pouring over the website, looking up their teams on you tube etc . . . Finally, I asked him if he wanted to go and he said "yes, yes, yes, yes, yes". This is a kid who doesn't ever ask for anything. At Christmas he tells me he wants a "hug" or something like that. So, for him these were really strong feelings.

I don't think it's a perfect fit. Arts are really important to me, and have been great for him, and that's a significant weakness. In addition, I worry about the social studies curriculum. It's definitely his greatest strength academically and what I assume he'll study in college, and rushing through non-honors level classes in the summer is less than ideal. I also worry about the religion aspect. We are not a religious family, and while I'm fine with him being interested in religions, and figuring out whether he himself is religious, I worry that 3 years of instruction in Catholicism, plus one year of "world religions", isn't a balanced way to do that. I also wonder if taking him from a school where he sometimes feels different because only 15% of the kids look like him, and going to a school where an even smaller percentage believe what he believes, makes sense.

It's also a lot of money.

And on the other hand, I really really trust my kid's instincts and he wants this so badly, and there are things that I do think would be a better fit.

I think the school is likely a "better" fit, but not a "perfect" fit, and not by a huge margin. I will probably let him apply, but also wage a propoganda campaign in favor of our public school. It may be that he'll discover things he loves about the public option and lose interest. If he does get in, and gets significant financial aid or scholarship, then it will be his choice. If he gets in without aid, then we'll really need to think hard at that point.


Really from your posts and from this last, it sounds to me like you are really leaning towards the public school, but I could be wrong, but it really was the feeling I got.

I live in a district where the public schools greatly outperform the local private schools. There are prep schools, but none are within easy driving distance (at least 45 minutes, not counting rush hour traffic) and I am not willing to shell out $35g on top of my already high property taxes. To be honest, the local parochial schools aren't an option. One: because they don't offer the quality of education that our public schools do, and two: we aren't christian and they are all catholic schools. The religion aspect is a deal breaker for us.

The other thing to think about, and I am going only on local private schools, is what additional expenses are there? I know from co-workers whose kids attend private schools that there are additional expenses. Things such as uniforms, supplies, activities fees, etc are extra fees not included in tuition. In addition they have to volunteer time at the school.
 

I can't tour until September/October, but we'll definitely do that.

The application process is pretty elaborate, so if we do decide to apply he'll need to go to an open house, spend a day shadowing, write essays, take a test, go to an interview etc . . . I would rather not ask him to do all those things, and then tell him he can't go. If I'm still on the fence, or still feeling like I'll let him go if there's financial aid, then we'll apply and risk it, but if I conclude that I won't let him go no matter what, then I'd rather not apply.

Take it one step at a time. Take a tour and have your son do a visitation day as soon as you can in the fall. Physically being at the school and talking to the teachers and admin will give you a completely different feel - good or bad - than what you can get on the website or over the summer. You'll be able to make a much more informed decision at that point.
 
I can't tour until September/October, but we'll definitely do that.

The application process is pretty elaborate, so if we do decide to apply he'll need to go to an open house, spend a day shadowing, write essays, take a test, go to an interview etc . . . I would rather not ask him to do all those things, and then tell him he can't go. If I'm still on the fence, or still feeling like I'll let him go if there's financial aid, then we'll apply and risk it, but if I conclude that I won't let him go no matter what, then I'd rather not apply.

We had a slighlty different approach...we told our son that he could go through the process and looked at it like it was a good experiment for him for college and beyond. My DS had do all the things above. We told him that we still might not be able to swing it if he did not get a scholarship. Well he did, he got 1/2 so we had to sit down as a family and make a decision, and then decision was yes, it was too good an opportunity.

But we definitely encouraged applying as an excersise and good practice.

Just some more to thinks about
 
I live in a similar area to OPs, it sounds like. In our county, the top schools are predominately white and Asian. There is no school choice. So if you live in one of these zones (and housing prices are reflective of the school's 'rank' and demographics), you would probably not pay for private school unless you were in the super affluent category (schools start @ $30k+/year/kid). There really are no accredited schools under that price in that part of the suburbs. So if you can afford the housing, but cannot afford the tuition, you move to these districts.

If you are Catholic, the high schools are closer to the city and run $15k for non-members (maybe $8k for members of the parish). The one in the more affluent area has the better reputation among the affluent. However, the one closer to the city, with more mixed demographics, is one of the better schools in its area, but not necessarily in this region.

Thanks for the explanation. I know when we lived in Madison, that if you lived in another school district, you could still go there, but had to pay an exorbitant amount of money.... I found this:
Paying the Price for Quality

The top city on the Forbes' list was Weston, Massachusetts, which also touted a median home price of $1 million or more. This small town, with a population of just over 11,000, boasts an education quality score of 96.80. If you have the equity to invest in a home in Weston, you can rest assured that your children will get a top notch education in this Boston suburb. In fact, for those who can afford a median home price of $400,000 or more, the northeast appears to be the place to settle. Other New England cities that made the Forbes' list include:

Belmont, Massachusetts
Westwood, Massachusetts
Acton, Massachusetts
Winchester, Massachusetts
Sudbury, Massachusetts
New Canaan, Connecticut
Madison, Connecticut
Franklin Lakes, New Jersey
Basking Ridge, New Jersey
Potomac, Maryland
Severna Park, Maryland
South Burlington, Vermont

While these cities are all good options, you don't have to head east to get a decent home and a high quality education. There are some Washington cities that also ranked well on the Forbes' list. These include Mercer Island and Sammamish. However, according to The Movers.com Blog, you don't get much of a price break on your home by moving across the country. The average home price for Mercer Island is $863,000, and in Sammamish, the median home price is $569,000.


I guess it's still considered one of the "Top Schools". I, honestly, am glad we moved right before my son started High School there...

Five students from a high school in Madison, Conn., have been arrested and charged with possessing steroids that two of the boys purchased while on vacation in Mexico.

The students have also been suspended for 10 days from Daniel Hand High School. School officials are continuing to investigate the case, with the students facing the possibility of expulsion.

Three of the boys have played for the high school's football team, which won the state championship in Connecticut's second-largest division last season, said H. Kaye Griffin, the superintendent of schools for the Madison School District. Only one of the students, who were arrested on Tuesday, was on the team's playoff roster.

The team went to the state Capitol in Hartford yesterday to be honored for winning the championship.

Two of the students bought 200 pills of Stenox, a steroid, at a pharmacy while in Cancún with their parents last month, said Detective Sergeant Todd Curry, head of the detective bureau at the Madison Police Department.

"You can buy them over the counter in Cancún," Curry said.

The school learned about the steroids when a teacher saw two of the students passing a container in a classroom last Thursday. It was a plastic Rolaids container, Curry said, but the teacher quickly realized that it contained something else.

After questioning by the principal, the students admitted that the pills were steroids, he said.

While all five students were charged with possessing steroids, one was also charged with selling a controlled substance and another was charged with possession of steroids with intent to sell them. The police said yesterday that they were preparing to arrest one more student.

This appears to be the first time that these students have used or purchased steroids, Curry said.

Griffin, the district superintendent, said there was no reason to suspect that the football team won the championship unfairly.

"Those students worked very hard to win their championship, and they did it in a way we can all be proud of," Griffin said. "This is not something I believe is a problem on our football team."

Steve Filippone, the football coach, declined to comment yesterday. But in an interview last year, Filippone said he was concerned that the increasing pressure on high school athletes was causing some of them to make unsafe choices.

Filippone said he favored drug-testing for high school athletes, because without it, coaches could not be certain their athletes were clean.
 
Thanks everyone!

I'm curious which school BBP thinks I'm leaning towards, because I feel like I'm on the fence.

I should also be clear that really all we're deciding now is whether or not to apply at all. The school has like a 50% acceptance rate and gives priority to Catholic applicants.

I should also say that I didn't go looking for a private school for him. For the most part I've been really impressed with our public middle school, he's done well there, has friends, seems happy. He's also got a diverse group of friends outside of school, from his old school, from his sports teams, family friends etc . . . Our adoption is also very open and he has role models in his extended family as well. I had been assuming he'd go on to high school with his friends.

This whole thing started because he and his best friend (who goes to a different middle school) attended the private school for a football camp. At the beginning the friend announced that he was going to "wow" the coaches and get a football scholarship. Well by the end of the week, the friend was no longer interested. He said there was too much "Jesus stuff" (his words, not mine), but suddenly my kid was interested. He didn't come out and ask, but he spent hours pouring over the website, looking up their teams on you tube etc . . . Finally, I asked him if he wanted to go and he said "yes, yes, yes, yes, yes". This is a kid who doesn't ever ask for anything. At Christmas he tells me he wants a "hug" or something like that. So, for him these were really strong feelings.

I don't think it's a perfect fit. Arts are really important to me, and have been great for him, and that's a significant weakness. In addition, I worry about the social studies curriculum. It's definitely his greatest strength academically and what I assume he'll study in college, and rushing through non-honors level classes in the summer is less than ideal. I also worry about the religion aspect. We are not a religious family, and while I'm fine with him being interested in religions, and figuring out whether he himself is religious, I worry that 3 years of instruction in Catholicism, plus one year of "world religions", isn't a balanced way to do that. I also wonder if taking him from a school where he sometimes feels different because only 15% of the kids look like him, and going to a school where an even smaller percentage believe what he believes, makes sense.

It's also a lot of money.

And on the other hand, I really really trust my kid's instincts and he wants this so badly, and there are things that I do think would be a better fit.

I think the school is likely a "better" fit, but not a "perfect" fit, and not by a huge margin. I will probably let him apply, but also wage a propoganda campaign in favor of our public school. It may be that he'll discover things he loves about the public option and lose interest. If he does get in, and gets significant financial aid or scholarship, then it will be his choice. If he gets in without aid, then we'll really need to think hard at that point.

Do any of the schools offer college programs? When me and DH moved to CO (Yeah, got married, after all the "hard part" of raising son's alone! :goodvibes ) we looked really hard at which school district to move into. The Fort Carson school district won out, because they got a lot of money from the military, gave all the students their own laptops for school, and had the program where they could simultaneously earn college credit. My son graduated from HIGH SCHOOL with 18 college credits (he spent 1/2 day at HS, and 1/2 day at college) in Computer Science (he's my "geek" :goodvibes )

Another really good program is SkillsUSA. They have many different occupational skills they focus on and compete other schools in the district/state, and nationally. My son won 1st place in Computer programing for the state in his Jr. year in high school, and got to go to Kansas City to compete (which sadly, he made a mistake on his coding and couldn't correct it before the competition ended :worried: )
 
Other New England cities that made the Forbes' list include:

Belmont, Massachusetts
Westwood, Massachusetts
Acton, Massachusetts
Winchester, Massachusetts
Sudbury, Massachusetts
New Canaan, Connecticut
Madison, Connecticut
Franklin Lakes, New Jersey
Basking Ridge, New Jersey
Potomac, Maryland
Severna Park, Maryland
South Burlington, Vermont
Totally OT, but Scrappy_Tink, since when is Maryland in New England? We are south of the Mason-Dixon line for goodness' sake...and New Jersey isn't New England either. Well, what can you expect? It's Forbes.
 
Our local community college offers dual enrollment with the public school but the IB and AP classes seem a more popular way to earn credit in high school.

I don't know about the private school.
 
Totally OT, but Scrappy_Tink, since when is Maryland in New England? We are south of the Mason-Dixon line for goodness' sake...and New Jersey isn't New England either. Well, what can you expect? It's Forbes.

:rotfl2: You got me!! Guess the editor didn't get a good night's sleep!
 
We had a slighlty different approach...we told our son that he could go through the process and looked at it like it was a good experiment for him for college and beyond. My DS had do all the things above. We told him that we still might not be able to swing it if he did not get a scholarship. Well he did, he got 1/2 so we had to sit down as a family and make a decision, and then decision was yes, it was too good an opportunity.

But we definitely encouraged applying as an excersise and good practice.

Just some more to thinks about

I like this approach. He and I also talked today about finding things he liked about both schools.
 


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