PRESCHOOL MOM'S QUESTION????

[twinmomplus2new]

Iwould like some feedback on my current dilemma... I have twins who will be 4 August 19th,04. They are currently in preschool in a 3 year old class. Most of the kids have turned 4 this winter/spring. So mine are some of the youngest in this class of 22 kids. Tommorow is registration for next year. They as returning students are already signed up for next year. I signed them up for a 4 year old class, 3 days, 3 hours a day. A much smaller class 12 compared to 22.
Heres my issue. They just called from the school and said They would like me to consider keeping them in the 3 year old class next year. As they have trouble sitting at circle time. I am of the opinion that they are learning to sit that is why they are there in the first place. I do not want them to be 4 with all 3 year olds who are just getting in the swing of things. Then she went on to say that they will be the oldest in the group rather than the youngest. And that having an August birthday I should not send them anyway. First of all Next September is 6 mts away, thats along time from 3 and a half to 4. And how in the heck can you predict readiness for kindergarten for 22 mts from now? Any opinions?

 

[Toby'sFriend]

And how in the heck can you predict readiness for kindergarten for 22 mts from now? Any opinions?

You're right. Children develop in uneven patterns and it is hard to guess.

I can tell my experience. 1st son -- August birthday and we started him at 5. 2nd son -- late July birthday and we learned our lesson and held him back.

I would have to say from our classes here, over 1/2 of beginning Kindergarten students are now actually 6 instead of 5. The "young" ones really can struggle.

You might want to check into what the trends are in your area.

 

[tw1nsmom]

I would put them in the 4 year old classroom unles they can come up with something more concrete than circle time. I'm finding that sometimes preschool teachers talk around issues. The only reason that I would consider putting them in a three year old classroom was if I was going to hold them back from kindergarten a year. Are they trying to say that your twins may be having larger behavior issues? Do they think they need to be evaluated? My DS receives special education services in a preschool setting. DD goes to the same school as a non-identified student (it's an integrated preschool...my twins will be 4 on April 2nd). Even in this setting, they have moved my children up to the 4-5 year old classrooms because they need older peers to model expected behavior. So, unless they can come up with a better explanation, the 3 year old classroom wouldn't be my choice. What they need is to be surounded by children who are modeling the right behavior, not reinforcing the "negative" behavior. If they still aren't able to sit still/concentrate by then (or maybe by next january or so) I would reevaluate whether the should go to kindergarten in 2005.

 

[preshi]

We were told Austin should go to pre-k, he is also an August baby but he'll be 5 this year. I can see wanting to hold him back from kindergarten bvecause of some of the things we discussed but not from moving to the 4 yr old class. If they had told me that last year I would have changed preschools.

 

[Ellester]

My oldest dd was the youngest in her 3/4 year old class. It was a class of 4's and younger 3's and she was a month younger than the next youngest (her birthday is in April). She did have a little trouble at first, but overall I think it was great for her. I agree that unless they can come up with something a little more specific than "can't sit still in circle time" I'd push to keep them in the 4's. It may depend on your school systems' cutoff dates too. Here ours is 10/15, so your kids would be on track for Kindergarten in 2005. I wouldn't want my child to go from a 3's preschool class right to Kindergarten.

 

[CEDmom]

I would ask if they could start in the 4 yo room and then evaluate the situation after a month or so. My DD is in the 4 yo room now and it is a huge change from the 3 yo room in terms of the amount of learning time vs. playtime. Perhaps you could do some circle time at home maybe with a few neighborhood kids to get your children ready. Will they be going over the summer? If not, I'd definitely spend time each day during something structured so they don't lose any ground.

We were on the fence about holding DD back for kindergarten because her social skills were lagging and she is also a late August baby. However, she's made tremendous progress.

 

[mrsv98]

Well, there are a few issues here. I am speaking not only as a mom to DD, almost 4yo but also as a former Pre-K teacher. First, are they boys or girls or one of each? In general, it takes boys longer to mature and the extra time is often helpful. Please note that I say in general, and there are always exceptions.

Second, what are their verbal skills like? How developed it their vocabulary? DD is in a 3yo class at the moment and she is one of the oldest, plus she has an unusually well developed vocabulary and sometimes finds it difficult to communicate with the younger children because they haven't developed the skills as yet. So if their language is strong, I would send them on.

Have you observed a class when they couldn't see you? There are varying degrees of having "trouble sitting in circle time" and a lot depends on the teacher's expectations. DD was in a preschool at the beginning of the year that turned out to be rigid beyond words. They expected 3 yos to be able to sit with their hands in their laps and their legs "pretzled up" on the first day of school. DD actually lost her turn playing a game because her legs weren't folded correctly. Needless to say, we took her out of that class as soon as we realized the problem and moved her to a much happier, more relaxed school. Also, speaking from my class, when we were teaching, as long as the children were in the rug area, sitting up and not on each other (tho often on us! ) we were not concerned with how they sat. So you see, teachers have different comfort zones on terms of sitting and movement.

Another point to ponder is the class size. Just because there are only 12 now doesn't mean the class will be so small come Sept. I am sure your school does as ours' in letting current students enroll before opening the class up to new students. You may well have another fairly large class by fall. If you think your two need more attention, perhaps keeping them in the 3 yo class would be best.

I hope this helps clarify some issues, in the end, you are the best authority on your children. Don't let the school push you in one direction when you know your children will be better served in a different class. Good luck!

 

[aprilgail2]

My daughter is a late year baby and I had all intentions of having her repeat 4 year old preschool again next year until the teacher called me in to talk to me. She said she would be very bored taking another year of preschool since she is already a beginner reader and doing kindergarten work now so she said Ireally should send her. She also went on to say most late year boys they recommend keeping back because they just don't mature as fast as girls.

 

[JetMom]

I am a pre-school teacher/director and I agree with your opinion. Pre-school is for learning theose classroom skills like sitting in circletime.

If I were you, I would ask if there is a way to observe the class without your children knowing that you are there. Or perhaps videotape circle time so thet you can see for yourself.

I would definitely not hold them back without a whole lot more information.

 

[twinmomplus2new]

Sorry I didn't kleep track of who asked. My twins are 2 boys. Thier verbal and communication skills are fabulous. for example they will say one moment please. Or what episode of scooby is this?

The numbers of the classes are a constant, 22 always 3 year old mornings, 2 days a week.
The 4 year old class there 2 options again the numbers are exact 22 M, W, F, mornings. and a 4 year old group of maximum 12 students. also 3 days a week. So we are talking a definate number of 12. And all the classes are to 2 teachers. So its 2 to 12 in the afternoon.
They do tend to talk over each other which can sometimes make them hard to understand. However thier vocabulary is ahead of schedule. The 2 boys are very different and to be honest, They have never once said twin 1 has trouble at circle time. Only twin 2. And that has been sporadic. I assume it is changing now, as they know I would not split them up.
And yes, circle time was the only issue raised. I did call my pediatrician who said. ABSOLUTELY NOT.. That they are 2 be in the 4 year old class. So they do not model younger behavior. That the time to evaluate readiness for kindergarten is next years end, not this years end.
I just called the preschool and spoke to the teacher and told them no, That I wanted them in the 4's as planned. That I had the 100% backing of my pediatrician. That in fact he insisted. ( Which he did) He also said if they resist putting them up into the 4's, put them some place else. Thanks everybody...I am trying to be less insulted then I was but I still am!

 

[TigrLvsPooh]

My son turned 4 last August 2nd. He was definitely ready for pre-k and is going to Kindergarten in the fall. He is the youngest in his class, but is second tallest. The main thing I would consider is the teachers opinion... they know best. I've always heard that twins can be slightly behind, so if I were you I'd do the 3 year old class again, and let them do Kindergarten in 3 years. The more time they have the better.

 

[Kallison]

First of all don't sweat it -- in 10 years this problem will seem very minute in the scheme of things. You are paying for preschool, if you want them to be with 4 year olds then tell them that is where you want them to be. I agree with you, maybe they will start K late, but then you can get them into a K-readiness program. I don't see why they have to be with all 3 year olds either, because they don't like to sit at circle time. I think sometimes teachers get too crazy with wanting all small kids to conform at the exact time. Good luck!

 

[mrsv98]

The biggest indicator for me is language skills. If they are doing well as you say they are then I would put them in the 4 yo class and not worry about circle time. If that is the biggest problem the teachers have, then they are lucky. We had a biter, a child with undiagnosed Auspergers, one that was way too young but we had to take and it goes on. Every class is made up of unique children and if their only problem is sitting still then they are doing great!

 

[robsmom]

I have had this type of discussion with my mom - who I consider very wise - but then again she's my mom!! My brother has 3 y/o twin boys - hence the discussion.

This depends on if they are boys or girls. If they are boys and if they were premature at all, in a heart beat she would tell you to hold them back. In fact for boys she would tell you to hold them back even if they were not premature. And when I say hold back, I mean decide now that they are going to kindergarten a year late, because you can't go from the 3 year old class to K.

Her logic is that you need to think ahead and that it is really a social issue. Boys tend to be less mature than girls as they grow up. If the Being the youngest later is life isn't that great - last to drive, last to hit all milestones etc. They also tend to be smaller - last to grow etc. By holding them back, you are giving them a social edge that will help them later in life.

If your kids were doing great in the 3 class, I woudn't want you to delay their development but it sounds like it would not hurt them now. It is much easier to hold them back now then to have to repeat a grade later. They will never feel like they were left behind because they will have birthdays in the same time frame as their friends, just first instead of last.

Sorry so long.

 

[pajamommy]

I'm a preschool teacher of three year olds, and I agree with everyone who said they should move on to the fours. I could see if there were a serious problem with your kids' development, but like you said, they are there to learn these skills, and they should be with children of their own age, where they can see others modeling behavior, etc.

I'm just curious, why do they have 22 kids in one class? How many teachers are with them? Even with a few teachers, that is a lot of three year olds to have together in one group.

 

[JulianneP]

My thoughts too Pajamommy 22 kids is way too many! I'm a former preK teacher and I could not imagine that many children no matter how many aides I would have. What size our the classrooms?? I would be more worried about that!!

 

[twinmomplus2new]

It is in fact 22 kids to a 2 teacher ratio. It is one solid classroom they team teach the kids in one room. There are no teachers aids. Just the 2 primary teachers. Thats one of the reasons I feel so strongly about this. I want them in the 4 year old class that only has 12 kids total to 2 teachers. I really think the advantages of a smaller group really seals the deal for me. they say over and over it is simply crowd control until at least Thanksgiving break. Why in the world would I want them to model younger behavior when they need to mature?

I also should add I may be a stay at home mom, But I also have my degree in elementary education. And this is going against what I have always known to be true.

As far as language skills. Just tonight we went to my mom's for dinner and one of them had an empty paper towel roll and he said and I quote here...." Can I take the tissue off of this roll ?" I asked why? And this was the exact response" Because I want to make a telescope so I can see humans that are far away" Call me crazy, but I think that is a pretty good command of the english language for a 3 year old.