Pregnant women, kids and busses...

[DaisyD]

- I just think it is odd that we are allowed to judge the strugglers who decided to board a bus and decide it is their own fault, .

It is their own fault. Who else can you possibly blame? LOL!

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

Don't forget that sometimes there are things that you can not see. My healthy looking teen age son has some balance issues from being premature that makes standing on the bus not only hard but not very safe.

That's a fare assesment...BUT..since when would that person with an unseen medical condition have the right to laugh at someone with a visible one.


So a frail old woman walks to a bus and your young son starts at the old lady's plight.

If your going to laugh at someone's plight--my guess is that you don't need the seat to begin with.

(and my guess is that your family would sit quietly and not make any comments at all about a family in OP's situation).

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

these threads can get really, really nasty very quickly. Many people have hidden issues that can't been seen. Yes, you may think its a prefectly healthy person just sitting while you are standing, but there maybe issues you may not be able to see.

One thing I have learned on the Dis, NEVER make a judgement call about things other people are doing that you may not agree with. There maybe a good reason that has nothing to do with manners.

Again OP said her family was laughed at and joked about.

If a person has an unseen condition and does this--they are heartless and rude and just plain awful and do not deserve their seat. I don't care what their problem is. A condition is no excuse to be rude!

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

While it is the considerate and polite thing to do, no one should ever feel obligated to give up their seat.

It should be done because someone wants to, not because they feel obligated to.

If you are waiting in line and see a bus filling, you always have the option of waiting for the next bus to arrive.

Courtesy goes both ways.

Anne

Actually there are some situations you are obligated and that is with the visible wheelchair usage. If you are sitting in those seats then the bus driver can make you move your caboose to let someone on who needs to be locked in.

 

[DaisyD]

Actually there are some situations you are obligated and that is with the visible wheelchair usage. If you are sitting in those seats then the bus driver can make you move your caboose to let someone on who needs to be locked in.

That would be the only time though. There are signs that say by law the handicapped must have access to those seats. There are no signs that say pregnant women, parents with children and so on must have seats. There is no obligation and should not be any expectation.

 

[DaisyD]

Again OP said her family was laughed at and joked about.

If a person has an unseen condition and does this--they are heartless and rude and just plain awful and do not deserve their seat. I don't care what their problem is. A condition is no excuse to be rude!

I find it hard to believe anyone was laughing at the OP and her plight. Young adults, aka teenagers laugh amongst themselves about all kinds of things. The OP was not privvy to what anyone was laughing at or joking about. She only assumed what they were doing. I'm still wondering why the OP just now posts about a trip she had way back in January. If it was that much of a concern then why wait til now to bring it up?

 

[taximomfor4]

I agree that if OP's family was being laughed at, that was rude. But I don't think that people are just being rude if they stay in their seats. We cannot read their minds to understand their reasons.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

That would be the only time though. There are signs that say by law the handicapped must have access to those seats. There are no signs that say pregnant women, parents with children and so on must have seats. There is no obligation and should not be any expectation.

I simply commented that there are times you are obligated to give up a seat.

I'm aware of the regulations.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

I find it hard to believe anyone was laughing at the OP and her plight. Young adults, aka teenagers laugh amongst themselves about all kinds of things. The OP was not privvy to what anyone was laughing at or joking about. She only assumed what they were doing. I'm still wondering why the OP just now posts about a trip she had way back in January. If it was that much of a concern then why wait til now to bring it up?

It's a discussion board.

I guess not everyone "rushes" to the DISboards when they come back from vacation and I guess she was busy having a baby.

We can find it hard to believe the OP wasn't laughed at but not hard to believe that everyone on the bus had an underlying condition?

A comment was made specifically to her. I guess we should give people the benefit of the doubt that they could have been talking to a wall.

 

[Spoodleink]

I think one of the main problem some people have is that some people are expecting others to give up their seats. It’s not a requirement it’s doing some thing nice and I don’t think if you don’t do something nice that automatically make you rude. It’s better to look at when someone does give up their seat for you as “Wow that was so nice” then if no one does as “What a bunch of rude people on this bus” I have had people move their kids on to their laps so I can sit down and was always grateful but never expected them to do it or gave them the evil eye if they didn’t. I have also given up my seat to people to have them barely mumble thank you and avoid eye contact with me the entire ride while their kid kicks me in the leg.

Several people on here have commented that its always able bodied well dressed young people not giving up there seats. I am one of those well dressed young people and have given up my seat to people with kids. We have only gone in September so the busses usually were not crowded and on most busses there were enough seats for everyone. I find it hard to belive you were on buses where the seats were all filled with pregnant women small kids the elderly and well dressed young people. There were no older but non elderly couples who could have given up a seat or a mom or dad with older kids.

I used to ride NJ Transit from Little Silver to NYC everyday and I would zone out and be oblivious to everything around me until I got to my stop. The same thing happens now I could not tell you what happens on a bus until we start pulling up to the front of the park. So if some one came on a needed a seat they would think I am rude for not getting up not that I just didn’t notice them. If some one really needed a seat and asked me if they could have mine I would not have a problem with it. But I feel like a lot of the people just expect to walk on to a full bus and have everyone jump up and give them their seat.

There has only been one time when i have been unwilling to stand on a bus, last year we were staying at POP and left MK after Wishes as we got close to the POP bus stop we could see the line was insanely long all through the waiting area and way back past several other stops. We didn’t feel like standing in line or on a bus so we just sat a bench a waited for the line to empty out. This took a lot longer but was worth it to me b/c I was dead tired. This doesn’t work in every instance but is some thing to consider if you really don’t want to stand at leat at the end of the night.

As far as opening door for women I think one of the original objections was that the focus was on boys opening doors for women because they happen to be women. Not teaching them to be polite and hold doors for people behind them or opening a door for someone who hands are full because it is a polite thing to do for anyone. Most of the people metioned teaching their sons theese things not their children. At least that is what stuck out to me. My parents had the same rules for both my brother and I, he was expected to hold or open doors and so was I. There were no special rules that he had to follow because he was a boy. You may not have meant your comments that way but that is how I understood them.

 

[noodleknitter]

My amazement with "the door opening incident" is that a stranger lectured some poor kid who was doing what he had been taught to do. The fact that he made the comment to his mom, later in private, rather than acting like so many other teen boys would have is commendable.

My kids would all open a door for people, but I will also say that my boys have been taught to open the car door for their girlfriends, grandmas, etc. So sue me.

 

[tarheelmjfan]

That's a fare assesment...BUT..since when would that person with an unseen medical condition have the right to laugh at someone with a visible one.


So a frail old woman walks to a bus and your young son starts at the old lady's plight.

If your going to laugh at someone's plight--my guess is that you don't need the seat to begin with.

(and my guess is that your family would sit quietly and not make any comments at all about a family in OP's situation).

It's been awhile since I've read all the posts, but I don't remember anyone saying their family member with a non visible illness sits around laughing at anyone, much less someone with a visible illness. Jumping to conclusions such as this could very well be the reason for this thread to begin with.

I've been on many WDW busses & can honestly say I've never seen anyone making fun of those standing. My family has been standing & there has been people around us talking & laughing, but it never occurred to me that they were laughing at us. They're on vacation. I hope they are having a good time, which often includes laughing. Unless they are talking very loudly, you could never know for sure they were laughing at you. I suppose it could happen, but I think it would be an extremely rare occurence. If it were a group of teens (esp. girls) they could be laughing at someone standing, but who knows what they're laughing about. They could be laughing because someone's shirt has a decal they find funny on it, or they have a friend who has a pair of shoes identical to those an older woman is wearing. <gasp> Unfortunately, that's what some teenage girls do. They giggle about everything.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

It's been awhile since I've read all the posts, but I don't remember anyone saying their family member with a non visible illness sits around laughing at anyone, much less someone with a visible illness. Jumping to conclusions such as this could very well be the reason for this thread to begin with.

I guess we've resorted to inferring that the OP is lying about her situation. Perhaps she wasn't even really pregnant to begin with.

The point I was making was that someone wouldn't not joke about someone's plight unless they were just being mean and there wasn't anything wrong with them and these threads always go to people's invisible medical conditions. Surely there cannot be THAT many people who are with such difficulties.

with non-pregnant/childless/young adults sitting comfortably by laughing at our plight.

I get nicer treatment on the DC metro during rush hour.

 

[tarheelmjfan]

I guess we've resorted to inferring that the OP is lying about her situation. Perhaps she wasn't even really pregnant to begin with.

Actually, I'm not inferring anything, which is exactly my point. I'm not saying the OP was lying, & I don't remember anyone else calling them a liar. I don't automatically assume anyone comes here to lie. However, it is possible that these people were laughing at other things. I can buy someone laughing at them once, possibly twice, but I can't imagine there being that many occurrences. I think the possibility of a misunderstanding is much more likely. The only way anyone could be certain they were laughing at them is if they are extremely loud in doing so. If all these people were so loud that it was obvious they were laughing at the OP's family, then I'm sorry they had to be exposed to what would be unusually bad behavior so often.

IMHO, the insinuation that a member's young son who has an unseen illness sits around making fun of those standing was uncalled for & way out of line. Jumping to conclusions is how things like this get started.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

Well we can give BOD of everyone on the bus--why can't we give BOD to the OP or others who are making comments outside of the bus situation, never expect others to actually give a seat up--but are merely just talking about the lack of common courtesy.

All they get in return is how courtesy is a two way street and how discourteous for them to think that. That's a cop out.

Imagine a thread about someone not holding open the door. Would they get jumped on for "expecting" the door to have been held open--probably. That is what is WRONG with everything. People have become discourteous and then it is excused b/c we shouldn't expect courtesy.

O, the insinuation that a member's young son who has an unseen illness sits around making fun of those standing was uncalled for & way out of line. Jumping to conclusions is how things like this get started.

I didn't insinuate anything about the woman's young son--I simply was making a point. Reread my quote--I assumed nothing about that family and in fact made sure to state so. OP said she was laughed at and everyone jumps to the "invisible ailment defense" as a general statement. I was making a point that someone with an invisible ailment shouldn't be laughing at anyone's plight.

IMHO we should read ALL posts carefully to understand what posters are saying. You have misread my post.

 

[powellrj]

these threads can get really, really nasty very quickly. Many people have hidden issues that can't been seen. Yes, you may think its a prefectly healthy person just sitting while you are standing, but there maybe issues you may not be able to see.

One thing I have learned on the Dis, NEVER make a judgement call about things other people are doing that you may not agree with. There maybe a good reason that has nothing to do with manners.

Here is my first post, I am the person with the unseen medical condition. I look like a perfectly heathy 40+ year old woman. I also wear leg braces that you wouldn't see if I were wearing pants. I am sorry, but to look at me, you would think I was able to stand but it would really be hard for me to do. Do I expect anyone to give me their seat. NO, but I also don't expect anyone to expect me to give mine up because I LOOK healthy to them.

No where in my post did I say it was OK to laugh at people, I am not sure where in any of these posts it says that its OK to laugh at others. In all the years I have been going to Disney (since 1973) I can't remember a time where I saw anyone laugh at the plight of others. I am not saying it didn't happen, but I am saying I have never seen it.

 

[my4kids]

It is their own fault. Who else can you possibly blame? LOL!

I guess that is underlying thing here, I'm not about assigning blame for everything, just about being kind to people when I can.

 

[tarheelmjfan]

That's a fare assesment...BUT..since when would that person with an unseen medical condition have the right to laugh at someone with a visible one.

So a frail old woman walks to a bus and your young son starts at the old lady's plight.

If your going to laugh at someone's plight--my guess is that you don't need the seat to begin with.

(and my guess is that your family would sit quietly and not make any comments at all about a family in OP's situation).

I didn't insinuate anything about the woman's young son--I simply was making a point. Reread my quote--I assumed nothing about that family and in fact made sure to state so. OP said she was laughed at and everyone jumps to the "invisible ailment defense" as a general statement. I was making a point that someone with an invisible ailment shouldn't be laughing at anyone's plight.

IMHO we should read ALL posts carefully to understand what posters are saying. You have misread my post.

I'm not sure how to read the 1st quote any other way. It seems the statement was full of implications & sarcasm. If that wasn't your intent, it comes across in a different light.

Well we can give BOD of everyone on the bus--why can't we give BOD to the OP or others who are making comments outside of the bus situation, never expect others to actually give a seat up--but are merely just talking about the lack of common courtesy.

To the best of my knowledge, the OP is getting BOD. To reiterate, noone has called the OP a liar, & I don't think anyone thinks she's making things up. I was simply pointing out there could be another explanation. I have no doubt the OP felt they were being made fun of. It is possible that in their frustration they misunderstood. I've gotten upset over things then seen them differently once I cooled down. It's not that uncommon. If anything, people were trying to let the OP know it probably wasn't anything personal.

FWIW, people didn't automatically jump to the invisible illness defense. That was just another attempt at explaining what could have happened. There are very legitimate reasons for one not to stand that wouldn't be immediately apparent. To automatically assume everyone who was sitting was rude, & enjoyed making fun of your plight would be a disservice to humanity. People were trying to let the OP know there could be other reasons for what happened that were not meant to belittle her family & their situation.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

Here is my first post, I am the person with the unseen medical condition. I look like a perfectly heathy 40+ year old woman. I also wear leg braces that you wouldn't see if I were wearing pants. I am sorry, but to look at me, you would think I was able to stand but it would really be hard for me to do. Do I expect anyone to give me their seat. NO, but I also don't expect anyone to expect me to give mine up because I LOOK healthy to them.

No where in my post did I say it was OK to laugh at people, I am not sure where in any of these posts it says that its OK to laugh at others. In all the years I have been going to Disney (since 1973) I can't remember a time where I saw anyone laugh at the plight of others. I am not saying it didn't happen, but I am saying I have never seen it.

I brought it up b/c I noticed that in the OP's post. It went unnoticed for the entire thread.

I brougth it up b/c EVERYONE is giving EVERYONE that rides these busses at Disney the BOD that they have an unseen medical condition.

I was simply pointing out the irony that if the people did laugh at the OP and her plight (as she observed but noone will give HER the BOD since she is so RUDE to notice the lack of courtesy of others)--that if they had an unseen medical condition AND laughed that would be lower than dirt.


I am not saying that anyone with an unseen medical condition would laugh nor did I insinuate anyone's child was doing so.

Just brougth up the point with a poster who mentioned her son---and brought up that if her son laughed that would be bad but that probably didn't happen nor was I making an insinuation of such in her case.

EVERYONE is giving EVERYONE on that bus that they have something wrong with them.

I don't think that is as valid a defense for lack of courtesy as everyone wants it to be.

FTR I don't expect seats to be given up for me--but am most appreciative when a seat is offered in any situation.

That some people still have manners to offer up a seat is not a bad thing.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

I'm not sure how to read the 1st quote any other way. It seems the statement was full of implications & sarcasm. If that wasn't your intent, it comes across in a different light.



.

I'm sorry I had a medical emergency 2 days ago from which I am still recovering. I am DISing to keep my mind off of it and dont' always articulate well. I articulate as clearly as I can. So I hope I can be given the BOD when I say that I didn't intend to insinuate anything about the person I quoted and her son.

I was merely pointing out the irony of BOD of a medical disability to whom the OP was speaking of---and the observation by OP that they were basically laughed at. It would be lower than dirt that IF said observation indeed occurred as observed AND said people had unseen disabilities they would then be the scum of the earth and since when would an unseen disability be carte blanche for rudeness to others about their plight.

I hope I have made that more clear. I thought the parenthesis statement was sufficient that I was not accusing or insinuating that person's son whom I quoted would be guilty of this.