Please hug your loved ones and tell your friends how much they mean to you!

[binny]

I woke this morning to the sounds of an ambulance across the street along with police cars, and a firetruck.

My neighbour had comitted suicide.

I had just spent an hour with him last night as he tried to help me fix my car. We were laughing and joking and I thought he was doing really well. We talked about all that was going in his life and while it was stressful, he seemed to have it all under control. I wish he would have said something. I feel terrible. I went to talk with his wife today and she is crushed.


Please talk to your friends, really listen for clues that they may not be ok if theyre struggling. And if you need to talk PLEASE find SOMEONE, call a friend, a pastor, a hotline, call me if you need to but just find SOMEONE who will listen. This is not the answer!!

God Bless and may you all find peace.
Binny

 

[grinningghost]

That is truly sad binny.

 

[ZachnElli]

I'm so sorry! How horrible!

 

[helenabear]

so very sad...

 

[KristiKelly]

How tragic. I'm very sorry. What an awful thing for his family to have to cope with, I'm sure they're very guilt stricken as well.

 

[vald1977]

 

[m&m's mom]

How very sad. I guess I am like you where you would sure think you could tell if someone was that bad off.

 

[Microcell]

That must have been so hard for you to know you saw him last night and with hindsight being 20/20...

 

[skuttle]

How sad. I'm so sorry. I guess sometimes you just never know what people are keeping in.

 

[Mimi Q]

 

[cgcw]

Very sad.

 

[Robinrs]

Very sad, Robin....

I never take life for granted, and spend hours a day making sure everyone in my life knows it. After all I've been through in the last few years I know no one is promised tomorrow...

God bless,

Robinrs

 

[Margie J]

How terribly sad that your neighbor felt there was no other way out of his private pain.

Yes, do talk to those in need of help. Understand though that those in need of help often don't reveal all their inner turmoil to the people closest to them. Friends and family should be supportive and get the person the proper professional care if possible. Even then there is no guarantee.

It's hard for survivors not to feel guilt. I should have known, should have been there, should have done more. Suicide is a life changing experience for those who go on. Sadly, I know.

I like Robin's attitude, NEVER take life for granted.

 

[Towncrier]

I was once told that "suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem". I have told my kids on many occasions that if they ever feel like life is no longer worth living, to find someone to talk to. A parent, a friend, just talk to someone. Someone will be able to help. They just need to find that someone. No matter how dark today may seem, better days are coming.

After a young girl in our community attempted suicide in a bathroom at the high school, I asked our pastor for a couple of minutes during our Sunday morning worship service. I pleaded with the congregation to talk to their loved ones about suicide. To talk about this taboo subject with their children, their spouses, their parents, and their friends.

I WILL take time to do what has been asked in the title of this thread. Every chance I get.

 

[binny]

Thanks everyone. THe whole neighbourhood is trying to rally around her, bringing her meals etc. The hard part for all of us has been decidingw hat to tell the kids. Everyone knows everyone in our little culdesac. Everyone says hi and waves to each otehr so they will know he isnt there.

The general consensus has been to try to explain that he didnt feel like he oculd live anymore and that if they ever felt like that it was important that they find someone to talk with and to know that better days are ahead, even if it doesnt seem like it.

Its very hard to explain this to kids.
Does anyone have any more ideas how we should approach this?

I wanted to stress that he was a great guy (he really was!) and that we shouldnt think bad of him because of this.

Cam said today " I just dont understand WHY he did it" I said " honey I dont either and I dont think we'll ever know"

 

[Rajah]

Those who would do this seem to hide it so well.

I know my dad did.

 

[Pooh93]

Very sad. Having lost two family members to suicide, I will talk openly with my children that nothing is ever that bad that you have to feel the only way out is to kill yourself.

Prayers for his family and {{HUGS}} for you Binny. I often feel guilty that I didn't pick up on the signals from my FIL. I knew he was acting totally out of character at the time and something was strange, but I never connected the dots until he died. I know hindsight is 20/20, but there really were signs in his case. However, I doubt it could have been prevented. In his case, he always selfishly did what he wanted to do and the hell with anyone else.

 

[cvemom]

Prayers to you and his family. There is much healing to do for them, and your entire neighborhood. P and PD to all.

 

[sjh801]

Thoughts and prayers and pixie dust for all of you who have been touched by the sadness. And , yes, we all need to let everyone know they are important always.

 

[darlene9947]

Prayers to that poor family. What a tragic situation. I, too, have always told my children that suicide was a permanent solution to a temporary problem. In the last year, 2 teenage girls in our subdivision have killed themselves. It just so hard on the family. And it really is hard to spot some of the "warning" signs. One girl's dad is a deputy sheriff and he obviously knew what to look for. Sometimes its just so hard for close friends and relatives to realize what's going on because kids hide their real feelings so well.