People waiting in line say the darndest things!

[DisneyBelle27]

I just subscribed to this thread, I'm loving it! It's too funny!!!

I'm definitely gonna be on the lookout for funny goings-on on my next trip in June!

 

[MHSweb79]

This isnt funny, but really gross.

We were at Sea World in California. The show ended and everyone was leaving. The lady in front of me was holding a baby about 15 months old. Baby's pacifier falls out of her mouth. Mom picks it up, reaches up and dunks it in the dolphins tank, and pops it back in baby's mouth. Eww

Not to go OT, but we were at Mystic Aquarium in CT and a guy stuck his hand in the penguin water. The CM (you know what I mean) said, "SIR! You will have to go the men's room right now and wash your hands with antibacterial soap!" The guy tried to laugh it off, but the CM insisted, and said, "That water is also their toilet!" The guy slunk off while the rest of us laughed.

Can't even imagine a poor little baby sucking on dolphin poo. People just aren't too bright.

 

[shaniadobie]

Oh my gosh - I just spit my water out! Funniest one yet!

Jill

too funny

 

[got_ron]

This happened on our last family trip. We went to GF to eat at 1900 Park Fare. My DSIL (11) as we were walking around takes a big whiff of air and says... "Wow, this place smells expensive!" It made us crack up and we love telling this story!

 

[2angels]

DH and I were sitting on a swing at the Poly beach and Wishes had just started. A dad and young boy were walking the pathway behind us:

boy: "Look! Fireworks!"
Dad: "Yeah, those are the Epcot fireworks"
boy: "But dad, that's the castle"
Dad: I know, but those are the Epcot fireworks.

What the heck?!?! DH and I just cracked up!!

This made me LOL!!!!

 

[KYCruiseCrazy]

ok. this might be old.....but oh well it was funny back then.

Uncle: i told you to go pee be for we got on the ride (20,000 Leagues Under the Sea: Submarine Voyage)

Little boy 6: But i "really got to GOOOOOO" (doing the Pee-Pee dance)

Uncle: ok, just pee in the corner. and be quite about it

Little boy 6:AHHHHHHHHHHHH

Uncle: just don't put your feet in it



and that was right before my first ride on Space Mtn at DL.
this happened on my 6th Bday while at DL.

some of the things we did back in the good ol' days!!

 

[PiperPizzaz]

1. In an open area near entrance to Soarin' two little boys, about 5 and 6 were kind of hopping around and playing - just normal kid stuff. They weren't hurting a thing. The dad grabbed them and stopped them and started SCREAMING: You two are ruining everything. Everything we have done this whole vacation has been completely ruined by you two. Everything. I've had ZERO fun this whole trip. ZERO. Do you hear me? etc etc etc.... The kids and wife were totally silent and so was everyone else within a 30 foot radius of this clown. He looked up and realized everyone was starring and excused himself to go to the restroom and then walked right into the ladies room.

2. Waiting in line for character autographs, a little girl sees the Country Bears and slams her book shut and stuffs it into her bag and says, "I don't want no hillbilly bears signing my book."

OK those are both hilarious!

 

[aurorae]

I've told this one before. In line for ME at the airport, behind an older couple. They started telling us how they were going to the All Star resort and it was an Animal Kingdom resort so they would be watching the animals from their room.

I didn't have the heart to tell them.

 

[aurorae]

To our 4yo, we were waiting in front of the castle for the show. Like I had done before every somewhat scary attraction, I started to explain that there would be an evil witch but that Mickey would win in the end, and she just gave me that "boy you grownups are slow" look that only a 4yo can give, and said, "it's only a play".

 

[DisCopper]

I had four (although not all in line):

1. Two women looking at the ducks in the water near the Castle: "It's amazing how they made robotic ducks like that!"

2. Son to Dad in standby line at Space Mountain, and pointing to the FastPass line: "Why are those people walking past us like that?"
Dad: "They paid money to do that. We can't afford it."

3. Not really what was said, but the actions. I rode Tower of Terror and was seated near two women who appeared to be in the 80's (or older). I was afraid one of them was going to have a heart attack or something. At the end of the ride, one of them said, "Let's do it again!" They started giggling like 8 year olds, grabbed hands, and ran back to get on again. (Take that you wimps who won't ride the Tower!)

4. At the Magic Kingdom in the 70's. ME to my mom: "What are you going to have to eat?"
Mom: "It doesn't matter what I get: hamburger, fish, or chicken. It all tastes the same here."
Fortunately, things have improved.

 

[Valentine]

We have the same problem! Ever since we left WDW last summer, my 2 year old has to know if the flush is going to be loud in public restrooms. If there is any doubt, she has to leave the stall before I flush.

A little off topic.. but.. as for the auto flushers.. .. carry a package of small post-its with you and put one over the sensor when you first enter the stall... it will prevent the toilet from flushing until you want it to... you take the post it off after your child exits the stall.. and it will take a moment before it flushes.. giving you plenty of "get-away" time

 

[2shortpeopleruleme]

We were at Turtle Talk when this gem happened! Crush was taking questions a little girl shoots her hand right up

C: Yesss dudette what is your question?
1stK: (after a little pause) Umm, my Uncle Jim died....
C: (I swear it looked liked the program skipped...after a long pause) Buzzkill Dude...OOOOK... How 'bout this little dude..
2nd kid: I found a turtle in the street once...
C: did you help it little dude?
2ndKanother long pause) yeah...

Then later in the week we were in MK on POC and were just passing where the pirates are in jail. The family in front of us speaks up and tells the little kids in their group 'see be good or you will end up in there with them like your Uncle!!'

DH and I were almost wetting our pants!

 

[Poohbear123]

Last Christmas we were in line for the Kilimanjaro Safari, a young black family was in front of us. The oldest of the children, probably about 12 years old, made the comment that it was really great to be at Animal Kingdom. Then very serious, he made the comment that it was wonderful to be getting back to his roots by being at the Animal Kingdom. The father looked at his son, and said I don't know where your from, but I'm from New York. The entire group around them broke out in laughter. It was some kind of moment.

NOW THAT IS FUNNY!!!

 

[LaLupita]

In line for TOT, a very elderly couple were standing just in front of me. They were speaking Japanese to each other very quietly, and I could tell they had no idea about the ride. When we got to the boiler room, and just before you enter the elevator, they were very confused about the directions the CM was giving them about where to place their feet on the arrows. A lot of hushed whispering, then the CM literally placed their feet where he wanted them. Then they both said "Aaaah!" and they nodded. So all through the ride, the Twilight Zone part, I kind of kept my eye on them, nodding to them and smiling. Then just as the ride showed them how high up they were and we began to freefall, I distinctly heard this meek foreign man beside me yell out (clear as a bell), "Son of a B----" I laughed so hard, I couldn't even tell you how many times we dropped!!!

 

[DisGeebs]

These are hilarious.

My story happened on a boat ride from Ft. Wilderness to the Magic Kingdom. This lady goes as we were passing the Discovery Island and goes "Is that the parking lot there??" Which is funny by itself.. but then someone responded "No, that is where Wet n Wild is"

 

[design_mom]

We were at Turtle Talk when this gem happened! Crush was taking questions a little girl shoots her hand right up

C: Yesss dudette what is your question?
1stK: (after a little pause) Umm, my Uncle Jim died....
C: (I swear it looked liked the program skipped...after a long pause) Buzzkill Dude...OOOOK... How 'bout this little dude..
2nd kid: I found a turtle in the street once...
C: did you help it little dude?
2ndKanother long pause) yeah...

Awwww, kids!

It reminds me of a story when we were at Turtle Talk. Someone asked Crush what he liked to eat. (Green sea grass. Seems like someone asks that question almost every time.) Then Crush asked a little boy what he liked to eat.

Boy: Quesadillas.
Crush: Aw, Dude... that's great. What are quesadilla's like?
Boy: Well, you get a tortilla and some cheese and some chicken and then you put in some black beans and some more cheese....
Crush (cutting in): Wow, dude... that's, um... specific!

 

[topmonkeygirl]

Waiting in line for Splash a father told his tween son "Yeah this is the ride the man had the heart attack on and died." He went on to tell him that when he got to the end of the ride he was already dead. I was sitting right behind him and I could hear him say this is the spot it happened on (right before the drop). I don't know if he did it to scare the kid or if he really thought that but I thought it was kind of funny.

Of topic but this is pretty funny. A yogurt commercial, Dannon I think, has a mom that says "isn't it amazing how fast kids are growing up these days." Did they grow alot slower 50 years ago? Did it take 10 years to reach the height of a 5 year old of today?

 

[aubriee]

The first time I took my eldest son and his daughter to WDW she really wanted to ride Rock'n Roller Coaster, but he wouldn't let her. He said she'd be too scared. Now my eldest son is a ride whimp, whereas my GD is a little daredevil and afraid of nothing. She put both hands on her hips and rather loudly said, "Who's scared dad, me or you? You're the chicken". Anyway I offered to go on with her, but for some reason he wouldn't let her.

A year later I took her back down there by myself for a GM-GD alone time trip. She hadn't forgotten about Rock'n Roller coaster and one day a week or so before the trip, glared at her dad and blurted out that she was going to ride it this time, "because Nana's not a chicken like you". I looked at my son, who shrugged, and told me to do what I wanted, but not to blame him if she got scared. Anyway, when we got to DS, she made a beeline to it. I asked her repeatedly all through the line if she was sure. She got really agitated with me and told me she knew what she was doing and couldn't wait. Anyway, once we got on the ride she reached up to pull the restraints down, then started looking for a seat belt. When I told her the overhead restraints was all she needed and all the ride had, she panicked. She started yelling, "what do you mean they don't have seat belts?" We took off immediately after that, and she screamed bloody murder throughout the ride that she was going to fall out. After we got off, she got really quiet and I asked her if she was OK. She said yes, so I asked her if she liked it and she said, "sort of". I then asked her if she wanted to ride it again and she said, "Let me think about it". She was so quiet, that it kind of scared me. By this time, we were walking out of the building and into the area where all the people who don't ride sit around and wait. Anyway, suddenly without warning she puts both hands on her hips, stomped her foot, and screamed really loud, "What were you thinking, letting me go on that ride. I could have been killed. I thought you loved me". I started laughing and reminded her that she had been insisting for a year that she was determined to ride that ride. She again stomped her foot, kept both hands on her waist and yelled, "What do I know, I'm a kid. Geez, you're supposed to be the adult". She had the most disgusted look on her face, it was hilarious. I'm sure all those people standing around waiting for their families to get off the ride thought I was the worst GM around, but they were all rolling with laughter. My GD was about 8 y/o.

 

[desert_starr_57]

In line for TOT, a very elderly couple were standing just in front of me. They were speaking Japanese to each other very quietly, and I could tell they had no idea about the ride. When we got to the boiler room, and just before you enter the elevator, they were very confused about the directions the CM was giving them about where to place their feet on the arrows. A lot of hushed whispering, then the CM literally placed their feet where he wanted them. Then they both said "Aaaah!" and they nodded. So all through the ride, the Twilight Zone part, I kind of kept my eye on them, nodding to them and smiling. Then just as the ride showed them how high up they were and we began to freefall, I distinctly heard this meek foreign man beside me yell out (clear as a bell), "Son of a B----" I laughed so hard, I couldn't even tell you how many times we dropped!!!

We did something like that once. My sis and her friend went with us down. We were in line and my sis and her friend had this gibberish language they did (if you knew it you could understand it) and they were chatting away. The people in front of us were listening. When it got to a point in the line they turned to us and said very loudly and very slowly while motioning "WELCOME TO AMERICA!!! YOU GO FIRST" My sister looked at them walked in front and said "Thanks!" Their jaws dropped. It was funny.

Another funny story that happened (but to us) we were staying in the Buena Vista Villas (that was a long time ago) we were coming back on the bus and my parents did not know the bus stop number. I didn't know what was going on and finally my parents just took us and got off. We had to walk and walk and walk and walk to get back (we were really far out) and they mentioned the number and I looked at them and told them what it was. They looked at me and said "Why didn't you tell us before we got off the bus!!??" I just said "You never asked!" But honestly I didn't realize they didn't know it.

 

[hookedonears]

This is not what someone said, but what the family in front us at the Land Ride were doing while waiting in line. It was a well inked and pierced family, a grandmother, a few kids, there ole ladies or ole men, and a few grandchildren were incredibly entertaining. The grandmother who had her Marlboro's in her cleavage was standing while her grandson, probably 7, was jumping up and down up and down hitting her on the ****, saying I hit your ****, over and over and over again. It took a minute or so before she stopped him. They were a treat.