off to neverland
DIS Veteran
- Joined
- Aug 21, 2004
- Messages
- 703
Cast:
Me, Rae, 34, with not-quite-broken-elbow
Dix, 43, Great guy who who makes Love Coffee
Boo, 4.95 year-old picky eater wearing a Brat Hat
Sis, 1.95 year-old
Goldi Locks, Nice DVC member who traded her points with us
Laser-accuser guy: Nice man helping out with world safety
Mr. Customs Man: Grumpy, serious guy in uniform with no patience for drugs or childbirth
Mr. And Mrs. No Manners: Rude people who pop up with different faces throughout our trip
Cute little girl in the front: Loud mouth who unintentionally traumatizes kids young kids on rides
Cousin: Make-up-less advisor whose areas of expertise include hats and droopy b**b prevention
My Dad: Fearless landrover driver who makes great spaghetti
My Mom: Woman who loves blue and might show up unannounced
Love-Boat-bellhop-guy: CM who likes to rescue damsels in distress
Shoe Girl: Girl who wears the most inappropriate Walt Disney World shoes EVER!
Sleazy Viagra Guy: No explanation needed for him
The German Hottie: Biergarten girl involved in the mysterious disappearance of the DDE confirmation
Backward Woman: Woman who entered monorail backward
Inventory of important trip items:
Three new premium annual passes
Fancy Laser Camera
Soaking wet Unofficial Guide to Disneyworld
Lost Disney Dining Experience cards
Brat Hat
Old Key West Key Card
Love Coffee
Biergarten Birthday Cake
I woke with the sad knowledge that this would be our last full day at Disney World. As I had done so many mornings in the past week, I threw the laundry I had washed the night before into the dryer. Since we had worn the same clothes over and over this trip, I had developed the habit of starting the washer before bed, and drying the clothes first thing in the morning.
As the clothes dried, Dix and I fed the kids breakfast and packed the bag for our last day at the parks. I decided to leave the soggy Unofficial Guide at the villa; there was no sense in taking it with us this day.
I handed the kids their warm clothes from the dryer and nagged at Boo to stop tying balloon strings around the chair and to please get dressed.
(I forgot to mention to you all in an earlier installment that I had mentioned to the front desk that both kids would be having a birthday the following week. One afternoon when we arrived back at the villa from a morning at Magic Kingdom, two birthday balloons and cards had been waiting on the sofa bed for the kids. Mickey had signed a birthday card to Boo, and Snow White had signed one for Sis.)
The warm clothes felt good to the kids, and they abandoned their balloon tying game, and dressed quickly.
We had a somewhat busy day ahead of us. We were going to spend a short amount of time at the Magic Kingdom, and then try Blizzard Beach. In the evening, we would go to Fort Wilderness to watch the outdoor movie.
As we drove to the Magic Kingdom, Boo reminded me what the purpose of our trip to Magic Kingdom was this morning: He wanted me to try to Big Thunder Mountain Railroad because he knew I would just love it.
I had explained to Boo several times that I had tried Big Thunder in the past, and I did love it, but he was determined that he would be the one who would introduce this ride to me, and simply ignored my comments that I had experienced it. Over and over, he explained to me what the ride was like.
I asked him several times if he was going to go with me, and he told me that though it had not necessarily scared him when he went on it with Dix several days before, it was too intense a ride for him, and he didnt want to go again.
But he was sure I would just love it.
We arrived for the opening, and Dix took the kids straight to . you guessed it! Buzz Lightyear! I was happy to have my assignment from Boo to ride Big Thunder and to miss Buzz.
The air was cool and crisp as I walked by myself to Big Thunder. The park was very empty, and I truly enjoyed these few moments to myself. I walked briskly, completely lost in my own thoughts except for the moment when the pretzel lady and I exchanged good mornings and she commented to me how chilly it was.
For some reason, I didnt feel chilly at all. I felt great.
I walked onto Big Thunder, and noticed a man and son seated behind me. The son must have been about six years old and was very excited to ride for the first time.
We took off, and the rollercoaster bucked and kicked around the track. Though it was pretty jarring at times, it didnt hurt my neck like Space Mountain had several days ago.
Boo was right: I did love Big Thunder!
When we pulled into the station, I looked behind me at the man and son. The son had tears streaming down his face, and looked like he was incredibly relieved it was over. I remembered Boos terror on Splash Mountain, and knew exactly how the father felt sitting next to his terrified son. Poor little guy.
When I exited the ride, I quickly walked over to Tommorrowland to meet up with my family. Boo was excited to see me, and wanted a full report of the ride. Did I love it? Was I scared in the dark tunnel at the very beginning of the ride? Did it go way fast? Was it way fun? Wasnt Disney World super great?
Yes, to all those, darling son ..
Boo was inspired by our talk of roller coasters and wanted to do a couple of runs on Goofys Barnstormer. I think the brisk morning air and excitement from Boo went to my head, because I suddenly had all sorts of energy. Lets go, quick! I told him, and grabbed his hand and took off in a jog, leaving Dix and Sis behind to catch up.
Boo was laughing at my silliness, and didnt want to stop running. There were very few people in the park, so we didnt slow down.
Boo kept yelling, Hurry, hurry!
As we approached Mickeys Toontown, we sped up. We werent far from our best ride!
A nice looking CM made eye contact with me and smiled as we approached. What are you two up to? he said as he laughed at us.
Were in a big hurry, I said between breaths as Boo and I kept going. We cant wait to get on Goofys Barnstormer!
Boo pulled on my hand to make me go faster.
Oh, Im sorry, guys, but Toontown is closed until 10:00.
I stopped dead in my tracks, dragging Boo to a stop. He pulled my hand to try to make me go again, and I explained to him that Toontown was closed and wed have to wait another 20 minutes or so before it opened.
We were both deflated, and I felt a little like Chevy Chase on National Lampoons Vacation. Remember when he is so excited to go to Wozzy World, only to find it closed?
Boo and I stood at the entrance of Toontown and waited for Dix and Sis to catch up with us. When they did, Dix couldnt help but laugh at my silly run all the way to a closed Toontown! He decided he would take Boo on the racecars while Sis and I looked at some balls at the kiosk near Toontown. Sis had seen them earlier and was mesmerized by them.
She and I browsed, and by the time the boys finished their ride, Toontown was open. We met up at the Toontown entrance and as we entered, Boo grabbed my hand and told me we had to run for it. We didnt have far to go, and I didnt feel quite so excited anymore, but I ran fast anyway, and pulled Boo along with me.
He liked my childlike behavior more than I think he enjoyed the actual rollercoaster ride.
When Boo and I finished our three or more turns on Barnstormer, we met Dix and Sis in the Paintpot where Sis had just had her face painted like Minnie Mouse. At first, I could only see the back of Sis because she was standing at a mirror staring at herself and couldnt bear to look away and acknowledge her mother and brother.
Finally, we got her to look at us. She took my breath away! She was beautiful!
I had never seen my daughter in make-up before, and was surprised at how grown up she looked, even with a black little mouse nose.
I could suddenly visualize her in 15 years.
STOP THE CLOCK!
I wondered if I was having a simple mother moment. Perhaps all mothers felt like this the first time they see their child in make-up? I looked at another little girl with the same Minnie Mouse face as my daughter. That little girl looked like an adorable little two-year-old with her face made up like Minnie Mouse. She didnt look 16, and I couldnt visualize HER trying to sneak out the window to meet a boy!
I looked back at Sis. She definitely looked 16. My daughter looked like a 16-year-old in Minnie Mouse makeup! I felt the sudden urge to tell her she wasnt allowed to date until she was 18, but instead told her how pretty she looked when I realized she still couldnt take her eyes off of herself in the mirror.
Dix and Boo decided to let Sis have her moment in the mirror, and left us to ride Goofy one more time. I sat on the bench and watched my daughter, and wished I could freeze her at this size forever. She would only be two for a year, and then she wouldnt really be a baby anymore.
When we finished up in Toontown, we rode a few rides in Adventureland, and then decided it was time to grab a bite to eat at Cosmic Rays. On our way there, we saw Jasmine and Aladdin and stopped for a picture with them.
Sis didnt seem to care to meet them, so Boo went by himself. He was quite taken by Aladdin, and told him that he had Aladdin action figures back at the room at Old Key West.
Aladdin asked him if he played with them like this and then did a hop, jump, and kick in the air.
Boo told him that was exactly how he played with them!
Aladdin was very interested in these figures, and told Boo to bring them by the castle sometime so they could play with them together.
Boo was thrilled, and couldnt stop talking about his Aladdin encounter. I wonder if he will ever play with his Aladdin action figures when he doesnt remember that moment when Aladdin asked him to join him sometime at the castle?
Cosmic Rays was good. I ordered the turkey wrap and pasta and was pleasantly surprised. It was very good!
The temperature had warmed enough to go to Blizzard Beach, so we drove back to the villa, changed into our swim clothes, and left immediately for Blizzard Beach.
Sis would have to miss her nap this day.
The cool air had chased most of the people away from this waterpark, and I was happy I had the kids fleece robes as we looked around for a place to park our things. Dix and I decided it would be best to lock up the fancy laser camera, so while he rented a locker, the kids and I tried Tykes Peak. Both Boo and Sis enjoyed the short tube slide. We developed a nice routine: I would pack Sis up to the top of the slide with the tube and leave her with the lifeguard, and then I would walk to the bottom to get her when she came down.
She was so cute! She sat as straight and tall as she could as the raft came down the slide and each time it spinned, she shrieked with joy.
The lifeguards that managed that slide were wonderful, and every time they saw Boo and Sis they would enthusiastically yell their names like they were long lost friends. Both kids felt special, and I found myself smiling each time I dropped Sis off with the lifeguard on top.
When they were ready to try something else, we moved to the slightly longer tyke slide that didnt use tubes. I was nervous about Sis on this one because there was no lifeguard catching the kids at the bottom and though I didnt mind catching her myself, I worried she would come down before I made it to the bottom to catch her. I wouldnt want to miss her!
There was a little line to the slide, and I was also worried that when I left her at the top of the slide in line, she might take off and I wouldnt see her. I doubted she would do this; she would most likely follow Boo, but I didnt want to take any chances.
I took her to top of the slide to talk to the lifeguard. Since this was a little tykes slide, certainly they had this issue all the time. The lifeguard was sitting in a chair staring down the slide with a bored look on his face.
As I spoke to him, he wouldnt look at me or make eye contact with me, but muttered in a monotone that he would make sure Sis got on the slide and didnt go down until I was at the bottom.
He did not once look at Sis or me.
If he never looked at us, how would he know she belonged to me?
I stood there for a moment and thought about it. I just didnt feel comfortable leaving her there, so I told him I changed my mind and she and I stood at the bottom while Boo took a couple runs. Boo wasnt overly thrilled with that slide, so we returned to the tube slide. As we approached, our lifeguard friends clapped and shouted, There are Boo and Sis! Yippee!
Both kids ran in excitement go grab their tubes.
When Dix had finally locked the camera and had finished a few runs on the thrill slides, we took the kids up the ski lift to do the family raft ride. Boo was a bit scared on the lift, since it was his first time on one.
I was surprised to see a fairly long line waiting for the family raft ride. As we waited, I glanced behind me and noticed three young guys in their twenties standing behind us.
I suddenly wished I were wearing shorts.
I was wearing my one-piece suit, and though it is fairly modest, its not the type of outfit I like people standing around studying me in. Especially 20-year-old men.
I could feel my butt growing right out of that suit as I stood there, and was convinced that the entire line behind me was staring at my quarter-inch of bum cheek that I could feel hanging out of the suit.
I glanced behind me to see if they were laughing.
They were talking amongst themselves and had no interest whatsoever in studying the flabbiness of my 34-year-old bum.
Phew!
I chuckled at myself and decided to quit being so self-conscious! I gave myself a silent pep talk: I work out on a daily basis, and though I certainly dont have the body I had in my 20s, there was no reason people would laugh at my bum in a swimsuit! It was time to be proud of myself! Time to realize Im 34 and proud of it! Time to realize .
I jumped when I felt a poke on my outer thigh.
Boo was poking his finger right into the soft fat deposits on my outer thigh below my hip, right into the area my Grandma calls saddlebags.
I swatted his hand away. For Petes sake!
His finger pushed right back into my leg, and in his loudest voice he said, Your leg is so squishy, Mommy!
I swatted his hand away again, and shifted my weight onto my other leg.
Sis had noticed what he had done, and she poked her finger into the saddlebag on the other leg and laughed.
Look Daddy, I can stick my whole fingernail into mommys soft leg, Boo exclaimed and pushed his finger into my flab. I didnt look, but Im sure he was able to make his fingernail disappear.
I more forcefully swatted his hand away and told him to stop.
But Mommy, its so soft! he told me.
Meanwhile, Sis was quickly patting my other leg and watching it jiggle. Pat, pat, pat..... Jiggle, jiggle, jiggle......
I was very aware that the voices of the guys behind us had become very quiet, and I didnt need to look behind me to know that they were stifling their laughter. I glanced at Dix, who was earnestly staring straight in front of him as he concentrated on keeping a straight face.
Dix would tell me later through fits of laughter that it took everything in his power not to burst out laughing and give my saddlebag a poke and jiggle, too.
Pat, pat pat... jiggle, jiggle, jiggle...Poke...Poke...
In an attempt to be supportive, and perhaps to keep himself composed, Dix took Boo aside to have what I assume was a discussion about respecting peoples personal space. All I could hear was Boos occasional, But I like doing it, Daddy, because it jiggles and I can make my fingernail disappear in Mommys leg!
Mortifying. Absolutely mortifying.
I picked Sis up to get her hands off my legs and she instantly screamed to be put down. She wasnt done jiggling my fat deposits.
I handed her to Dix and breathed a sigh of relief that we were moving forward in the line.
Note to self: The next time we do a waterpark, bring swim shorts.
Next installment:
Part 16:..Lost in the Wilderness!
Previous Installment:
Part 14...The Big Fight!
See below picture for more previous installments.
Me, Rae, 34, with not-quite-broken-elbow
Dix, 43, Great guy who who makes Love Coffee
Boo, 4.95 year-old picky eater wearing a Brat Hat
Sis, 1.95 year-old
Goldi Locks, Nice DVC member who traded her points with us
Laser-accuser guy: Nice man helping out with world safety
Mr. Customs Man: Grumpy, serious guy in uniform with no patience for drugs or childbirth
Mr. And Mrs. No Manners: Rude people who pop up with different faces throughout our trip
Cute little girl in the front: Loud mouth who unintentionally traumatizes kids young kids on rides
Cousin: Make-up-less advisor whose areas of expertise include hats and droopy b**b prevention
My Dad: Fearless landrover driver who makes great spaghetti
My Mom: Woman who loves blue and might show up unannounced
Love-Boat-bellhop-guy: CM who likes to rescue damsels in distress
Shoe Girl: Girl who wears the most inappropriate Walt Disney World shoes EVER!
Sleazy Viagra Guy: No explanation needed for him
The German Hottie: Biergarten girl involved in the mysterious disappearance of the DDE confirmation
Backward Woman: Woman who entered monorail backward
Inventory of important trip items:
Three new premium annual passes
Fancy Laser Camera
Soaking wet Unofficial Guide to Disneyworld
Lost Disney Dining Experience cards
Brat Hat
Old Key West Key Card
Love Coffee
Biergarten Birthday Cake
I woke with the sad knowledge that this would be our last full day at Disney World. As I had done so many mornings in the past week, I threw the laundry I had washed the night before into the dryer. Since we had worn the same clothes over and over this trip, I had developed the habit of starting the washer before bed, and drying the clothes first thing in the morning.
As the clothes dried, Dix and I fed the kids breakfast and packed the bag for our last day at the parks. I decided to leave the soggy Unofficial Guide at the villa; there was no sense in taking it with us this day.
I handed the kids their warm clothes from the dryer and nagged at Boo to stop tying balloon strings around the chair and to please get dressed.
(I forgot to mention to you all in an earlier installment that I had mentioned to the front desk that both kids would be having a birthday the following week. One afternoon when we arrived back at the villa from a morning at Magic Kingdom, two birthday balloons and cards had been waiting on the sofa bed for the kids. Mickey had signed a birthday card to Boo, and Snow White had signed one for Sis.)
The warm clothes felt good to the kids, and they abandoned their balloon tying game, and dressed quickly.
We had a somewhat busy day ahead of us. We were going to spend a short amount of time at the Magic Kingdom, and then try Blizzard Beach. In the evening, we would go to Fort Wilderness to watch the outdoor movie.
As we drove to the Magic Kingdom, Boo reminded me what the purpose of our trip to Magic Kingdom was this morning: He wanted me to try to Big Thunder Mountain Railroad because he knew I would just love it.
I had explained to Boo several times that I had tried Big Thunder in the past, and I did love it, but he was determined that he would be the one who would introduce this ride to me, and simply ignored my comments that I had experienced it. Over and over, he explained to me what the ride was like.
I asked him several times if he was going to go with me, and he told me that though it had not necessarily scared him when he went on it with Dix several days before, it was too intense a ride for him, and he didnt want to go again.
But he was sure I would just love it.
We arrived for the opening, and Dix took the kids straight to . you guessed it! Buzz Lightyear! I was happy to have my assignment from Boo to ride Big Thunder and to miss Buzz.
The air was cool and crisp as I walked by myself to Big Thunder. The park was very empty, and I truly enjoyed these few moments to myself. I walked briskly, completely lost in my own thoughts except for the moment when the pretzel lady and I exchanged good mornings and she commented to me how chilly it was.
For some reason, I didnt feel chilly at all. I felt great.
I walked onto Big Thunder, and noticed a man and son seated behind me. The son must have been about six years old and was very excited to ride for the first time.
We took off, and the rollercoaster bucked and kicked around the track. Though it was pretty jarring at times, it didnt hurt my neck like Space Mountain had several days ago.
Boo was right: I did love Big Thunder!
When we pulled into the station, I looked behind me at the man and son. The son had tears streaming down his face, and looked like he was incredibly relieved it was over. I remembered Boos terror on Splash Mountain, and knew exactly how the father felt sitting next to his terrified son. Poor little guy.
When I exited the ride, I quickly walked over to Tommorrowland to meet up with my family. Boo was excited to see me, and wanted a full report of the ride. Did I love it? Was I scared in the dark tunnel at the very beginning of the ride? Did it go way fast? Was it way fun? Wasnt Disney World super great?
Yes, to all those, darling son ..
Boo was inspired by our talk of roller coasters and wanted to do a couple of runs on Goofys Barnstormer. I think the brisk morning air and excitement from Boo went to my head, because I suddenly had all sorts of energy. Lets go, quick! I told him, and grabbed his hand and took off in a jog, leaving Dix and Sis behind to catch up.
Boo was laughing at my silliness, and didnt want to stop running. There were very few people in the park, so we didnt slow down.
Boo kept yelling, Hurry, hurry!
As we approached Mickeys Toontown, we sped up. We werent far from our best ride!
A nice looking CM made eye contact with me and smiled as we approached. What are you two up to? he said as he laughed at us.
Were in a big hurry, I said between breaths as Boo and I kept going. We cant wait to get on Goofys Barnstormer!
Boo pulled on my hand to make me go faster.
Oh, Im sorry, guys, but Toontown is closed until 10:00.
I stopped dead in my tracks, dragging Boo to a stop. He pulled my hand to try to make me go again, and I explained to him that Toontown was closed and wed have to wait another 20 minutes or so before it opened.
We were both deflated, and I felt a little like Chevy Chase on National Lampoons Vacation. Remember when he is so excited to go to Wozzy World, only to find it closed?
Boo and I stood at the entrance of Toontown and waited for Dix and Sis to catch up with us. When they did, Dix couldnt help but laugh at my silly run all the way to a closed Toontown! He decided he would take Boo on the racecars while Sis and I looked at some balls at the kiosk near Toontown. Sis had seen them earlier and was mesmerized by them.
She and I browsed, and by the time the boys finished their ride, Toontown was open. We met up at the Toontown entrance and as we entered, Boo grabbed my hand and told me we had to run for it. We didnt have far to go, and I didnt feel quite so excited anymore, but I ran fast anyway, and pulled Boo along with me.
He liked my childlike behavior more than I think he enjoyed the actual rollercoaster ride.
When Boo and I finished our three or more turns on Barnstormer, we met Dix and Sis in the Paintpot where Sis had just had her face painted like Minnie Mouse. At first, I could only see the back of Sis because she was standing at a mirror staring at herself and couldnt bear to look away and acknowledge her mother and brother.
Finally, we got her to look at us. She took my breath away! She was beautiful!
I had never seen my daughter in make-up before, and was surprised at how grown up she looked, even with a black little mouse nose.
I could suddenly visualize her in 15 years.
STOP THE CLOCK!
I wondered if I was having a simple mother moment. Perhaps all mothers felt like this the first time they see their child in make-up? I looked at another little girl with the same Minnie Mouse face as my daughter. That little girl looked like an adorable little two-year-old with her face made up like Minnie Mouse. She didnt look 16, and I couldnt visualize HER trying to sneak out the window to meet a boy!
I looked back at Sis. She definitely looked 16. My daughter looked like a 16-year-old in Minnie Mouse makeup! I felt the sudden urge to tell her she wasnt allowed to date until she was 18, but instead told her how pretty she looked when I realized she still couldnt take her eyes off of herself in the mirror.
Dix and Boo decided to let Sis have her moment in the mirror, and left us to ride Goofy one more time. I sat on the bench and watched my daughter, and wished I could freeze her at this size forever. She would only be two for a year, and then she wouldnt really be a baby anymore.
When we finished up in Toontown, we rode a few rides in Adventureland, and then decided it was time to grab a bite to eat at Cosmic Rays. On our way there, we saw Jasmine and Aladdin and stopped for a picture with them.
Sis didnt seem to care to meet them, so Boo went by himself. He was quite taken by Aladdin, and told him that he had Aladdin action figures back at the room at Old Key West.
Aladdin asked him if he played with them like this and then did a hop, jump, and kick in the air.
Boo told him that was exactly how he played with them!
Aladdin was very interested in these figures, and told Boo to bring them by the castle sometime so they could play with them together.
Boo was thrilled, and couldnt stop talking about his Aladdin encounter. I wonder if he will ever play with his Aladdin action figures when he doesnt remember that moment when Aladdin asked him to join him sometime at the castle?
Cosmic Rays was good. I ordered the turkey wrap and pasta and was pleasantly surprised. It was very good!
The temperature had warmed enough to go to Blizzard Beach, so we drove back to the villa, changed into our swim clothes, and left immediately for Blizzard Beach.
Sis would have to miss her nap this day.
The cool air had chased most of the people away from this waterpark, and I was happy I had the kids fleece robes as we looked around for a place to park our things. Dix and I decided it would be best to lock up the fancy laser camera, so while he rented a locker, the kids and I tried Tykes Peak. Both Boo and Sis enjoyed the short tube slide. We developed a nice routine: I would pack Sis up to the top of the slide with the tube and leave her with the lifeguard, and then I would walk to the bottom to get her when she came down.
She was so cute! She sat as straight and tall as she could as the raft came down the slide and each time it spinned, she shrieked with joy.
The lifeguards that managed that slide were wonderful, and every time they saw Boo and Sis they would enthusiastically yell their names like they were long lost friends. Both kids felt special, and I found myself smiling each time I dropped Sis off with the lifeguard on top.
When they were ready to try something else, we moved to the slightly longer tyke slide that didnt use tubes. I was nervous about Sis on this one because there was no lifeguard catching the kids at the bottom and though I didnt mind catching her myself, I worried she would come down before I made it to the bottom to catch her. I wouldnt want to miss her!
There was a little line to the slide, and I was also worried that when I left her at the top of the slide in line, she might take off and I wouldnt see her. I doubted she would do this; she would most likely follow Boo, but I didnt want to take any chances.
I took her to top of the slide to talk to the lifeguard. Since this was a little tykes slide, certainly they had this issue all the time. The lifeguard was sitting in a chair staring down the slide with a bored look on his face.
As I spoke to him, he wouldnt look at me or make eye contact with me, but muttered in a monotone that he would make sure Sis got on the slide and didnt go down until I was at the bottom.
He did not once look at Sis or me.
If he never looked at us, how would he know she belonged to me?
I stood there for a moment and thought about it. I just didnt feel comfortable leaving her there, so I told him I changed my mind and she and I stood at the bottom while Boo took a couple runs. Boo wasnt overly thrilled with that slide, so we returned to the tube slide. As we approached, our lifeguard friends clapped and shouted, There are Boo and Sis! Yippee!
Both kids ran in excitement go grab their tubes.
When Dix had finally locked the camera and had finished a few runs on the thrill slides, we took the kids up the ski lift to do the family raft ride. Boo was a bit scared on the lift, since it was his first time on one.
I was surprised to see a fairly long line waiting for the family raft ride. As we waited, I glanced behind me and noticed three young guys in their twenties standing behind us.
I suddenly wished I were wearing shorts.
I was wearing my one-piece suit, and though it is fairly modest, its not the type of outfit I like people standing around studying me in. Especially 20-year-old men.
I could feel my butt growing right out of that suit as I stood there, and was convinced that the entire line behind me was staring at my quarter-inch of bum cheek that I could feel hanging out of the suit.
I glanced behind me to see if they were laughing.
They were talking amongst themselves and had no interest whatsoever in studying the flabbiness of my 34-year-old bum.
Phew!
I chuckled at myself and decided to quit being so self-conscious! I gave myself a silent pep talk: I work out on a daily basis, and though I certainly dont have the body I had in my 20s, there was no reason people would laugh at my bum in a swimsuit! It was time to be proud of myself! Time to realize Im 34 and proud of it! Time to realize .
I jumped when I felt a poke on my outer thigh.
Boo was poking his finger right into the soft fat deposits on my outer thigh below my hip, right into the area my Grandma calls saddlebags.
I swatted his hand away. For Petes sake!
His finger pushed right back into my leg, and in his loudest voice he said, Your leg is so squishy, Mommy!
I swatted his hand away again, and shifted my weight onto my other leg.
Sis had noticed what he had done, and she poked her finger into the saddlebag on the other leg and laughed.
Look Daddy, I can stick my whole fingernail into mommys soft leg, Boo exclaimed and pushed his finger into my flab. I didnt look, but Im sure he was able to make his fingernail disappear.
I more forcefully swatted his hand away and told him to stop.
But Mommy, its so soft! he told me.
Meanwhile, Sis was quickly patting my other leg and watching it jiggle. Pat, pat, pat..... Jiggle, jiggle, jiggle......
I was very aware that the voices of the guys behind us had become very quiet, and I didnt need to look behind me to know that they were stifling their laughter. I glanced at Dix, who was earnestly staring straight in front of him as he concentrated on keeping a straight face.
Dix would tell me later through fits of laughter that it took everything in his power not to burst out laughing and give my saddlebag a poke and jiggle, too.
Pat, pat pat... jiggle, jiggle, jiggle...Poke...Poke...
In an attempt to be supportive, and perhaps to keep himself composed, Dix took Boo aside to have what I assume was a discussion about respecting peoples personal space. All I could hear was Boos occasional, But I like doing it, Daddy, because it jiggles and I can make my fingernail disappear in Mommys leg!
Mortifying. Absolutely mortifying.
I picked Sis up to get her hands off my legs and she instantly screamed to be put down. She wasnt done jiggling my fat deposits.
I handed her to Dix and breathed a sigh of relief that we were moving forward in the line.
Note to self: The next time we do a waterpark, bring swim shorts.
Next installment:
Part 16:..Lost in the Wilderness!
Previous Installment:
Part 14...The Big Fight!
See below picture for more previous installments.
Poor thing....that is so NOT funny, but can't stop laughing about it.
I would just die when she did that in public.
