Orlando Smackdown: Dis vs. Uni. Ch.16 Japan Hates me, Just Hates me 7-13

[monymony3471]

Well we could tell you, but I'm sure he would tell it so much better.

Anxiously awaiting!

Hey Nebo, get a tri pod! I feel like I just got off of RNRC after watching your video of the room at RP. OY!

I have serious eye issues with watching jumpy things and being on simulators, makes me immediately sick! I also can't be the passenger in a car.

Awesome perk there Nebs, I guess Uni knows a celebrity when they see one.

 

[pkondz]

When you fly United, you normally get an Airbus, but we got a reasonable price from American Airlines, which seems to be mostly, ahem, Macdonnel-Douglas-80 planes, or, M-80's
And they are smaller.

The MD80 (an M-80 is a firecracker, MD80 is the plane) is smaller. But the E90 (Embraer 190) with 40 fewer seats (2 and 2 instead of 2 and 3) is even smaller... But for real fun...

I was part of the essential services at a small town airport in Northern Manitoba (Google Lynn Lake, MB if you want) and had to remain when they evacuated the town due to an approaching forest fire. Eventually I got a flight out in a DHC2 Beaver...

in a fold down seat at the back of the cargo area of this single engine propeller float plane...

behind yards and yards of fire hose that reeked of smoke...

on a very windy, turbulent day...

where the plane couldn't go above two thousand feet (jets normally fly in the area of 30 - 40 thousand)...


Good times.

Did I mention that I dont like to fly?

See above.

On second thought, don't.

The airbus seats 3 on both sides.

I've also been on the B777 (very nice, BTW) and a DC10 both of which are 2 - 5 - 2 and the B747 which is 3 - 4 - 3.

When you fly as a couple, as they say, "two's company, three's a crowd."

They do? They should make a sit-com with that! Maybe with an actress who's a real wit and another that's kinda somery... summery. Oh, and gotta have an actor as well, just to be Johnny on the spot.

Especially when she want the ailse seat, and I want the "drunken, passed out on dope, wake me when we get there" seat.
I mean the window seat.

So that's what that seat is supposed to be called.

I want to be able to make sure the pilot isn't drunk himself and weaving all over the sky.

Ah don't worry, there's always the co-pilot... or Karen Black can make do, too.

I am, however, please to say we did arrive in Florida safe and sound.

Point of order, your honor! Safe, yes... but sound?

I believe the taxi arrived right on time at 4:30.

ooooh... and here I guessed that you'd be getting up at 5:45. I was way off there.

We had the two big suitccases, two carrions and the "personal bag" just outside the door for the cabbie to load into the trunk.

Had that part right!

"Do you need help with the bags?" she asked my wife.
"That would be nice, " she replied.
And that's as far as it went.

Too bad she didn't call a cab to come and help with the bags...

I was still in the house, making last second double checks, and Smidgy was still trying to get the driver to pop the trunk. I almost fell over the bags in the very dark night, since I didn't want to leave a light on the whole time.

Ya know... you could have turned it off after you loaded the bags... that's what the switch on the wall is for. Try it! You'll see.

No, not that switch... the other one.


There ya go.

The cabbie was doing her laundry at an "Open all night" laundromat, and the trunk was already filled with bags of her laundry!

Okay... What????

Perhaps the whole 'taxi' concept was unclear to your driver. You should've asked her if she'd ever driven a cab?

One of our suitcases got to ride shotgun in the front seat next to the cabbie.

It bugs me when my kids call shotgun... but I hate it when the suitcase does.

Nobody likes a stuck up suitcase.

SHe then proceeded to get on the mostly deserted highway, and get all the way over into the left lane.
Doing 50 miles per hour.
Speed limit is 55 here, so everybody does 65.
70 in the "far left lane."

I was really pleased to hear that a driver got ticketed up here recently for driving in the left passing lane. That drives me nuts. (There are even signs which say "Slower traffic keep right")

heh. drives.

The car would seemt o suddenly swerve left or right, enough to where your head would actually move in delayed reaction, so I started to watch her.

But she wasn't the one doing it, the car was doing it on it's own!

Excuse me? Do you have a radio? Yes? Could you call us a cab, please?

I glanced at Diane to see if she was noticing it too.
Oh yeah she was, she was staring at me in fear and a look of "What the hell's wrong with driver?"

Aw, poor Smidgy.

It was so quiet though in the car that there was no way I could tell her it wasn't the driver but the car itself, and I have a feeling that if I had, that wouldn't have helped her fear issues in the slightest bit.

No, I suppose not. "Don't worry Diane. When we all die in a horrible fiery collision... it's not the driver's fault, it's the car!"

"Oh, thank goodness. I feel so much better now."

I once had an axle fall off my Mazda, and of course, once again I was on the highway doing about 70 when it happened, but it happened with no warning that time.

I would imagine that would be... disconcerting.

This time it looks like we are getting more than a "heads up", more like a "Run for your lives, the dam has broke" warning.

Where's a little kid with big fingers when you need one???

I'm now, purposely avoiding making eye contact with Smidgy,

What are you saying here? I know you’re not supposed to make eye contact with wild animals (lions and tigers and bears, oh you know). Are you saying that she was ready to pounce?

I figured that indifference would ease her tension so I sat there with my face pressed to the side window, watching the passing dark go by, trying to monitor our progress to the damn airport.

And that worked????

Wow.

Usually I get, “You knew?? And didn’t TELL ME???” and then things don’t go so well… :

We made it without incident, but not without a pair of huge sighs of relief in two part harmony as we pulled up to the "Terminal", I still love that they gave that name for peple to use when taking the Aluminum Tube of Death as their mode of transportation.

Followed, eventually, by the dreaded “Final Boarding Call.”
Just make sure you get on the Northbound flight and not the Southbound one…

I started to work on paying the driver, Smidgy was hugging some wino outside the taxi stand.

Yeah, but she came away with an extra bottle and some spare change, right?

After paying her in cash, this company didn 't take credit cards, I had already had the money set aside including tip in my pocket so I wouldnt have to fumble in the dark, and I just handed it to her. Smidgy couldn't believe I gave her a 12 dollar tip, I told her it was because we were still alive, that made it worth it.

I think I might’ve mentioned something about, “Here’s a little something extra so you can get your deathmobile fixed.”

When we were still at home the day before, and Smdgy had finished packing her checked bag, she asked me to feel it, worrying that it might be over 50 pounds, resulting in an extra fee.

You can tell weight by just feeling something?

I have a sneaking suspicion you might not be getting that many hugs anymore…

Just sayin’

I thought it weighed a lot more than that myself, but the scale can't be wrong.

No, of course not. That mass produced, probably spring loaded that’s been stretched innumerable times, cheap scale can’t be wrong can it?

Nahhh….

I had visions of taking the big bottle of vodka out and having to chug half of it down to "lighten the load."
But I would do it;
For her;
For America and capitalism;

You’re sacrifice is so… so… Selfless!

It's now security time, which is also called, "give Nebo a heart attack" time. (sorry, in this instance, 3rd person works better than first person)
(by the way, what is Second person?)

Just a second, I’ll check. “No, wait,” I said to myself. “You can’t expect others to not have answered this can you?”

Probably. So nevermind.

And wunce more I got yelled at.

This is getting to be a regular thing with me and the TSA.

Hold it.

Wunce?

Sure.

Wunce. The involuntary reaction to being called out by TSA the first time, even though you know you’re clean.

To wunce. I wunced.

Followed of course by:
Twunce.
Thrunce.
Quadrunce
Quinunce…

Oh great, I'm slipping, the enhanced brain drug I've been taking is no loonger working, I'm reverting back to my former state ov I,Q, 83.

Nah… too easy.

And believable.

I took my shoes off.
I took my jacket off.
i took my hat off.

And that’s what it’s all about.

Then, following orders, I tried to step into the Orgasmatron, but was stopped.

Well sure… who do you think you are? Woody Allen?

I looked back at Sargeant Hulka, "now can I go through?"

Odd. I had to Google that. But I have seen Stripes… but I think the last time was when it was a new release in theatres.

In there, I had to hold my arms up over my head, but I guess it wasn't working, I got no orgasm at all.

Who do you think you are? Jane Fonda?

On the other side, Diane's allready got her shoes back on,

Was she smiling? Or glowing?

No reason… just wonderin’

"Sir, is that a wallet in your back pocket?"

"yes it is, but it's not metal, as far as I know."

"May I see it?"

You really are at the TSA’s mercy. Oh, sure, no rights are being violated. You can say no at any time. No problem.

Sorry? What’s that? The thousands of dollars you’ve spent on airline, and other travel related costs are going down the toilet?

tsk

He thumbed through it, but if he would have even TOUCHED my Annual pass,,,,,,,,,,,,

some things are sacrosanct

I so wanted to say, "You" Sir" me one more time I'm going to prescibe a 24 hour enema," until I realized I'm not on MASH, and Sargeant Hulka probably wouldn't get it.

And send him on a 10 mile hike. With full pack.

If necessary, I was going to be flying Air La La Land if need be, and if I would have had to chug that Wodka bottle,, all the better. Have I mentioned that I hate to fly?

Really?

Huh.

Didn’t know.

"Yes I do," I told him, "Drugs." And with that I pulled them out of my pocket and showed him the handfull of pretty different colored pills, looking him in the eye the entire time.
For some reason, I was no longer worried about retribution or any of this, I was just kind of, amused is the word that comes to mind.

Followed by…
“All right now, Mr. Nebo, SIR. Please bend forward so Sgt. Rizzo can execute the cavity search… Still amused SIR?”

At the gate now with an HOUR AND A HALF TO KILL, I went to work on my fidgetting. Then I worked on my fussing.
After that I practiced my squirming and finally, my paciing.

What. No jittering, twiddling or twitching? Hey! You’re getting the hang of this flying stuff, huh?

Finally, the airplane taxi driver showed up.
He was dragging a small suitcase behind him, but I
don't think it was his laundry.

Ah, ha! You’ve crossed over into my area of expertise. The pilot’s suitcase is an essential tool that while once was essential is now more of a backup.
Inside you will find:
-Aviation charts
-Weather charts (including Area and Terminal Forecasts as well as current weather reports at departure, destination, alternate and enroute aerodromes)
-SIDS (standard instrument departure) and STARS (standard terminal arrival) plates
-Alcohol
-Bible
-Last Will and Testament

See? Not laundry.

This time, he wasn't Pontius the Pilot, or even Clutch Cargo, But why is it that every, single, flight I get on, the Captain is about 80 years old? His hair was as white as snow. His belly shook like a bowl full of jell,,,,hold it, wrong prose.

Hey, at least that guy’s been flying for years without any accidents or incidents.

So now, I'm doing the Ol "look around" for somebody to play the Leslie Neilson role of the clever doctor. You know,
just in case something should happen to the pilot.

Wasn’t his hair white too?

Apparently, Leslie isn't flying with us today, I couldn't find anybody even worthy of playing the blow up autopilot!

Plus you’d need Elaine to… um… inflate him.

Then, for the fist time in our entire lives, we had to go and fetch our own baggage, since we are NOT using Magical Express, can't, right now, we need to get to Doubletree Resort, across from Universal.

Really? I guess typically you drive. How many times have you flown into MCO?

I've always hated when somebody said to me when I was single, "yeah, but I have baggage issues."

You would prefer baggage psychosis?

That morning at MCO, we had baggage issues.

night all, neb, and I do love you all, no matter what Ponzi says. I even like him, too.

Aw.. ya big lug.

Great start, dude. Gonna keep reading… :

 

[pkondz]

If you had hair today what color do you think it would be?

A stunning auburn with long flowing locks. Think Fabio, but with personality. But it drove the girls into a frenzy so Smidgy made him shave it off.

just wanted to add, the cabbie lady, was pretty much toothless. mentioned a few times that she thought she was done for the night and doing her laundry when she got the call.

Toothless?

now, when you arrange for a taxi pick up 3 weeks ahead of time, and then call to confirm a few days ahead of time, why would they have to surprise someone? wouldn't you think they would have someone all set up?

now that you mention it... Yes I would.

I was hoping to get my long haired buddy we got the last time, the one who picked me up at the vfw in a snow storm.

I remember him!

but we end up with what looked like a homeless lady who probably lives at the pads shelter near the VFW.

Hey, there's your answer. She doesn't normally drive a cab. Could be she's doing it for some extra cash.

ya know, while her broom's in the shop.


I told her to come open the trunk and she said , "it's open, just pull it up!"

wow. just. wow.

so steve goes to lift it.. no WAY! no way is this trip being ruined by his back going out before we even leave Illinois. so Ikinda growl at her, get out of the way, and heave it up and into the trunk.

good call at stopping Steve from throwing his back out at the start of the trip... but it sucks that you had to do it.

"hurry up, I'm not supposed to stop here, and I could get a big fine".

sooooo tempting.

"Officer! Could you come over here and help us with our bags? No? But you're going to give her a ticket? Oh, dear. Sorry about that, bye!

(I'm sitting here at the computer in shorts right now, in dec, in Illinois)


Lookit those legs! Woo hoo!


ummm.... disregard that last bit.... and that camera, too

I was going to mention something about it, but then thought, if she wants it cold, there must be a reason.

Considering the ride you had, I would think that it was broken. Bad thermostat or something.

I know it's old and time-worn, but sometimes you simply hafta', for old-time's sake.

Did TSA-guy at least buy you dinner first?

an oldy but a goody!

You is the second person.

I hope my English teachers are proud.

Hah! I knew someone would ‘splain it.


I do remember in all of my creative writing classes (degree in Communications) being told NEVER to have the narrator die when you are writing in first person. As in, "Then I died."

Really? Odd. ‘Cause every time I read anything Nebo writes, I die a little inside.

One word or phrase just might have tipped the scale.

And how completely weird, but totally normal in a Nebo TR, that I can simultaneously shudder/chuckle?

See Nebo, shoulda used that scale to measure the bag’s weight instead of relying on his feelings.

And Buzz you hit it right on the head about the shudder/chuckle bit.

As we pulled out of our finger street to the road that takes us to the main drag to the highway,

You pulled your finger out of the dam (yes I know there’s another word, but it’s frowned upon) and the driver was dressed in drag?

The cab driver started to turn left, and I yelled out, "STOP"
"Turn Right like he just told you!"

Did I ever tell you about my cab ride to the airport when I was a kid? I don’t remember for sure which trip it was, although I’m pretty sure it was our first trip to Florida so I’d be about 13 at the time.
I remember it was dark out (early morning, like your cab ride) and my Mom told me to go out to the cab so he’d know we were coming. I get in the back of the cab and he promptly starts to back out of the driveway.
“Where are you going?!?!??”
Driver, “What?”
Me, “The rest of my family’s coming, too!”
Without a word he moved back up the driveway.

I don’t think my parents even knew anything had happened until years later.

But but, I really don't want to die in EITHER person!
Ok, give me an example of writing in the second person, really.

I did! But again, I got beaten to it.

so I always try to sit near the plane entrance, and when they call are "Group" I am right there.

I used to relax and sit while the cattle lined up at the chute. What’s the rush? The plane ain’t going nowhere until we’re all on board, so why stand in line?

Yeah. That’s why. Now I try to be at the front of the line, too.

cause I can't believe how many selfish people I see throw their life's posessions in the overhead. "ok, my carry on, my huge backpack, my winter coat, honey, give me the diaper bag, and your bulky coat also.

I don’t get how all these airlines have these metal contraptions that your carry-on has to fit in…. but they never seem to enforce it. I’ve seen people with bags that are at least four times the allowed size trying to shove them into the overhead bins.

I think as a reward for their initiative their bags should be allowed to sit in first class… their owners can remain on the ground.

who knows who goofus and gallant are?

I do vaguely remember them… but I wouldn’t have known if you hadn’t mentioned them before.

Back in the day I had a whole collection of MAD magazines and books
I haven't read one in years! Those and Archie comic books. I remember those big blue books with bible stories in the Dr. and dentists offices back when I was little.

All of the above.

I got Highlights at home before I started school, afterwards throw in some Weekly Readers and Archies, then I moved up to MAD magazine. After that, right into Rolling Stone (quite a leap, I know). Might explain a little bit about me, now that I think about it.

That is quite the leap! Kind of like, “I went from sipping non-alcoholic apple cider to tequila shots.”

Just finished working on the baggage story, but it's really a non story, so don't worry. Hey, look at that! A reverse cliffhanger! I'm losing it.

What do you mean “losing”?

man, why didn't this come up as a link? this is SO funny. cat people vs. dog people

A friend showed me that the other day. Pretty funny… and true.

Not much, what with all those holes in them.

Holes? What holes? You don’t think he actually hit any of them do you?

Heeeeyyyyy!
I've been sitting here, bored, not sure what I wanted
to read or look at, and I ended up pulling up all my "subscriptions".
…

But just from the trip reports themselves, not counting
the dining reviews, we have crossed one million views!

That’s pretty darn impressive Steve. I’m kinda doubting there are too many people on the DIS (or anywhere else actually) who have their writing viewed one million times.

I think it’s a big deal.

So congrats. You’ve earned it.

 

[monymony3471]

That’s pretty darn impressive Steve. I’m kinda doubting there are too many people on the DIS (or anywhere else actually) who have their writing viewed one million times.

I think it’s a big deal.

So congrats. You’ve earned it.

And he blushes at the attention.


I think its great and just for that you and Diane need to bump your April trip to February so it overlaps with mine.

 

[Xclusive2WDW]

Loved the update. While we always spend two days at Uni, we always stay at Disney (unless we stay off-site). You officially have me interested in doing a split stay (With the longer portion of the trip at Disney, just on principle, lol)

 

[nebo]

Ok, let's see who's showing up in the magic mirror today:

Curious to know what his reaction to that was?

Mike and Heather made it sound like I was a bit more flumoxed then I really was. I was taken aback when she grabbed my back at first, but immediately she said that this is from Monica, and all I could think of right away to say was, "Ok, now you go and give this right back to her." Hey, hugs are always a good thing, unless they're from a python.
or Rosanne Barr

YAY for a room upgrade !! We haven't gotten over to Uni yet, but my DS really wants to go.

Wow, they close at SIX ??? I think Disney should get a point for staying open later .... just sayin'.

BTW - you can get those Friday's mozzarella sticks from the grocery store or Wal-mart. They taste pretty good if you bake them. I admit they are better at the restaurant.

For the most part you're right; unless you pick a day to go to Magic Kingdom when they are running a "Mickey's not so Scary Merry Christmas Party" that night, and they kick you out with no parade or fireworks show.

Anxiously awaiting!

Hey Nebo, get a tri pod! I feel like I just got off of RNRC after watching your video of the room at RP. OY!

I have serious eye issues with watching jumpy things and being on simulators, makes me immediately sick! I also can't be the passenger in a car.

Awesome perk there Nebs, I guess Uni knows a celebrity when they see one.

Sorry about the jerkiness, but this isn't a video camera I'm using, just a 7 megapixel cheapo digital camera. As for the perk, Yeah, way to go Smidgy!

I was part of the essential services at a small town airport in Northern Manitoba (Google Lynn Lake, MB if you want) and had to remain when they evacuated the town due to an approaching forest fire. Eventually I got a flight out in a DHC2 Beaver...

"Nice Beaver".

in a fold down seat at the back of the cargo area of this single engine propeller float plane...

Like in the movie, The Edge?

behind yards and yards of fire hose that reeked of smoke...

on a very windy, turbulent day...

where the plane couldn't go above two thousand feet (jets normally fly in the area of 30 - 40 thousand)...


Good times.

Right. "Um not thanks, I think I'll walk"





I've also been on the B777 (very nice, BTW) and a DC10 both of which are 2 - 5 - 2 and the B747 which is 3 - 4 - 3.

All I've ever flown was the MD-80 or Airbus.
And the Astro Orbitter.
Once.

They do? They should make a sit-com with that! Maybe with an actress who's a real wit and another that's kinda somery... summery. Oh, and gotta have an actor as well, just to be Johnny on the spot.

They can't, the Grim Ritter took Johnny and Stanley and Mr. Furley. Of all the old sit coms, I believe that is the most dated of all of them, and I used to watch iit all the time, and even laughed. I tried watching it last week once, and i can't believe I used to like it. WOW







Ah don't worry, there's always the co-pilot... or Karen Black can make do, too.

Missing the Karen Black reference. From an Airport movie?


Ya know... you could have turned it off after you loaded the bags... that's what the switch on the wall is for. Try it! You'll see.

Ok, hold on,,,,

No, not that switch... the other one.

This one?

There ya go.

Now how do I turn it off from inside the cab?

Okay... What????

Oh, your'e just trying to confuse me.


It bugs me when my kids call shotgun... but I hate it when the suitcase does.

If it didn't it would have ridden Aunt Edna style!


I was really pleased to hear that a driver got ticketed up here recently for driving in the left passing lane. That drives me nuts. (There are even signs which say "Slower traffic keep right")

heh. drives.

Please don't tell me that just amused you.
Or that you also find Pauly Shore movies funny.



Excuse me? Do you have a radio? Yes? Could you call us a cab, please?

I think she would have responded, "Ok, you're a cab."
There! See how you like it!

Aw, poor Smidgy.

What am I, fried liver?

No, I suppose not. "Don't worry Diane. When we all die in a horrible fiery collision... it's not the driver's fault, it's the car!"

"Oh, thank goodness. I feel so much better now."

I also could nto find a seatbelt in the back on my side.

I would imagine that would be... disconcerting.

Yes, it was also troubling.


What are you saying here? I know you’re not supposed to make eye contact with wild animals (lions and tigers and bears, oh you know). Are you saying that she was ready to pounce?

Buzz made a good summation of the situation; the fence we were both sitting separating annoyance and outright panic was beginning to shake.



And that worked????

Wow.

Usually I get, “You knew?? And didn’t TELL ME???” and then things don’t go so well… :

That's good, and yes, been there as well.

Followed, eventually, by the dreaded “Final Boarding Call.”
Just make sure you get on the Northbound flight and not the Southbound one…

We were heading East as well, would that be purgatory or limbo?

You can tell weight by just feeling something?

My point of reference is a 40 pound bag of top soil, that I've carried many, many times in my life.





No, of course not. That mass produced, probably spring loaded that’s been stretched innumerable times, cheap scale can’t be wrong can it?

Nahhh….

I still don't get it to be truthfull, but it was right on as far as my weight goes.

Just a second, I’ll check. “No, wait,” I said to myself. “You can’t expect others to not have answered this can you?”

Probably. So nevermind.

Seriously, I don't think that method is used much at all, except maybe in instruction booklets.




Well sure… who do you think you are? Woody Allen?

Ok, got to do it, short list. His best 5 movies.

5. Play it again, Sam
4. Bananas
3. Sleeper
2. Annie Hall
And his very best movie he made and acted in;
1. Love and Death

Odd. I had to Google that. But I have seen Stripes… but I think the last time was when it was a new release in theatres.

I liked that movie a lot until it got too stupid at the end when they tried to turn it into an Action movief also.



Who do you think you are? Jane Fonda?

Whoa, not often you get a Barbarell a reference on a Disney trip report! I always wondered what Henry thought of that movie.

Was she smiling? Or glowing?

Neither, having a cigarette.


some things are sacrosanct

My annual pass?
No, I'm pretty sure it's plastic.

And send him on a 10 mile hike. With full pack.

Why am I hearing a Colonel on MASH now adding;]
"Nice touch"?


Followed by…
“All right now, Mr. Nebo, SIR. Please bend forward so Sgt. Rizzo can execute the cavity search… Still amused SIR?”

Um, first, Is the cavity followed by a deep cleaning, and is Rizzo a man or woman?



What. No jittering, twiddling or twitching? Hey! You’re getting the hang of this flying stuff, huh?

Right. I have agoraphobia sometimes in crowded places dealing with people, claustrophia, acriphobia, and a fear of dying, that makes flying a grand slam!

-Alcohol
-Bible
-Last Will and Testament

See? Not laundry.

I figured it was his own personal parachute. "Like hell I'm going down with the plane!"

Hey, at least that guy’s been flying for years without any accidents or incidents.

And we know he's been flying for years, why?

Wasn’t his hair white too?



Plus you’d need Elaine to… um… inflate him.

Can you say inflate on the DIS?
OH, I came THIS close to using a form of the real word there and combining "inflate". I'm sure it would not have been cunning on my part.

Really? I guess typically you drive. How many times have you flown into MCO?

This is our 5 time now, only other time I've flown is our honeymoon to Miami for a cruise, and I don't mean Tom, that would be a reach.





Aw.. ya big lug.

Great start, dude. Gonna keep reading… :

Thank you sir.

A stunning auburn with long flowing locks. Think Fabio, but with personality. But it drove the girls into a frenzy so Smidgy made him shave it off.

Been watching those old Hai Karate commercials again?







Really? Odd. ‘Cause every time I read anything Nebo writes, I die a little inside.

So THAT"S where that smell is coming from!

See Nebo, shoulda used that scale to measure the bag’s weight instead of relying on his feelings.

And Buzz you hit it right on the head about the shudder/chuckle bit.

Would that be a Shuckle or a Chudder?






Did I ever tell you about my cab ride to the airport when I was a kid? I don’t remember for sure which trip it was, although I’m pretty sure it was our first trip to Florida so I’d be about 13 at the time.
I remember it was dark out (early morning, like your cab ride) and my Mom told me to go out to the cab so he’d know we were coming. I get in the back of the cab and he promptly starts to back out of the driveway.
“Where are you going?!?!??”
Driver, “What?”
Me, “The rest of my family’s coming, too!”
Without a word he moved back up the driveway.

If that would have happened nowadays, you would have never noticed becasue you would have either been talking to your buddy on the cell phone or playing a game on it.
"Escuse me sir, so where'd you put my mom and dad?"

I don’t think my parents even knew anything had happened until years later.

Our kids still like playing the, "Mom, remember when I,,,,," and tell her the REAL story now.

I did! But again, I got beaten to it.

As well you should.

I used to relax and sit while the cattle lined up at the chute. What’s the rush? The plane ain’t going nowhere until we’re all on board, so why stand in line?

Yeah. That’s why. Now I try to be at the front of the line, too.

I always wonder, if you have to check a legit carry on bag cuz there's no room overhead, do they also charge you for it as well?

I don’t get how all these airlines have these metal contraptions that your carry-on has to fit in…. but they never seem to enforce it. I’ve seen people with bags that are at least four times the allowed size trying to shove them into the overhead bins.

This time, I actually saw TWO people rebuffed with their carry ons being too big, and I wanted to cheer. I see they even have "Bag Sizers" near the entrance to where you board.

I think as a reward for their initiative their bags should be allowed to sit in first class… their owners can remain on the ground.

Or, "No boarding for you except water boarding."



That is quite the leap! Kind of like, “I went from sipping non-alcoholic apple cider to tequila shots.”

what's your point?

What do you mean “losing”?



A friend showed me that the other day. Pretty funny… and true.

Yeah, I thought it was really clever.





.

And he blushes at the attention.


I think its great and just for that you and Diane need to bump your April trip to February so it overlaps with mine.

Hey, I thought there was no room at the Inn? So where are you staying?

Loved the update. While we always spend two days at Uni, we always stay at Disney (unless we stay off-site). You officially have me interested in doing a split stay (With the longer portion of the trip at Disney, just on principle, lol)

XFactor, that's how we do it, 3 nights works great at Uni, and THEN comes the longer stay at Disney. No, you don't want to do Disney first, always save Disney for the last part, and always try to save the longer STAY for the last part, nothing worse than checking in and thinking your trip is mostly over already.

 

[Xclusive2WDW]

XFactor, that's how we do it, 3 nights works great at Uni, and THEN comes the longer stay at Disney. No, you don't want to do Disney first, always save Disney for the last part, and always try to save the longer STAY for the last part, nothing worse than checking in and thinking your trip is mostly over already.

XFactor, haha I like that. Oh yes definitely. I am thinking of surprising my hunny with a split stay at BLT and AKL when we go next year. He wants to stay at AK, but also really wanted to stay in a villa at BLT. Yes you definitely want to stay the shorter portion first and I have to end with Disney. In fact, I have to begin AND end with Disney. We usually do Universal right in the middle. Like I said, this TR really has me thinking of trying the Uni resorts.

Happy Holiday's everyone!!! Peace, Joy and lot's of Love to everyone and their families!!! *plus a little Disney magic*

 

[monymony3471]

I thought the ticker was a dead giveaway????


Coronado, that was our first on property stay with the boys. The girls were just pixie dust back then.

 

[pkondz]

"Nice Beaver".

"Thanks, I just had it stuffed."

Like in the movie, The Edge?

Dunno, never saw that one.

They can't, the Grim Ritter took Johnny and Stanley and Mr. Furley. Of all the old sit coms, I believe that is the most dated of all of them, and I used to watch iit all the time, and even laughed. I tried watching it last week once, and i can't believe I used to like it. WOW

I'm not all that surprised. At the time it was 'edgy'. Now, it wouldn't even come close.

plus I googled and Mrs. Roper's gone too.

Missing the Karen Black reference. From an Airport movie?

Yup. Airport 75 I believe. The one where the small plane smucks into the plane and one pilot gets badly injured and the other one's sucked out of the gaping hole. Luckily, Karen's piloting skills turn out to be nowhere near as abysmal as her acting skills.

Now how do I turn it off from inside the cab?

The clapper

If it didn't it would have ridden Aunt Edna style!

heh. And here I'm just about to start watching Nat'l Lampoon Christmas Vacation

Excuse me? Do you have a radio? Yes? Could you call us a cab, please?

I think she would have responded, "Ok, you're a cab."
There! See how you like it!

Oh, all right. Turn about is fair play.

What am I, fried liver?

Liver? probably not, but Fried?...

We were heading East as well, would that be purgatory or limbo?

I'd have to go with purgatory since according to Dante, limbo is part of hell... first circle I believe.

Ok, got to do it, short list. His best 5 movies.

5. Play it again, Sam
4. Bananas
3. Sleeper
2. Annie Hall
And his very best movie he made and acted in;
1. Love and Death

I am ashamed to admit that I don't think I've ever seen a complete Woody Allen movie from beginning to end. I usually show up somewhere in the middle.

Whoa, not often you get a Barbarella reference on a Disney trip report! I always wondered what Henry thought of that movie.

Barbarella - 1968
On Golden Pond - 1981

'nuff said?

Was she smiling? Or glowing?

Neither, having a cigarette.

D'oh! That's much better then my line.

And send him on a 10 mile hike. With full pack.

Why am I hearing a Colonel on MASH now adding;]
"Nice touch"?

Close. It was a General that said it.

Um, first, Is the cavity followed by a deep cleaning, and is Rizzo a man or woman?

Rizzo was the guy who was usually found under a jeep in the motor pool, and if memory serves had at least one son named Little Bubba.

Hey, at least that guy’s been flying for years without any accidents or incidents.

And we know he's been flying for years, why?

Because the poem you quoted was written in the 1800s and I haven't heard of a single incident.

This is our 5 time now, only other time I've flown is our honeymoon to Miami for a cruise, and I don't mean Tom, that would be a reach.

Well, considering his stature, anything Tom Cruise tries to grab would be a reach.

Would that be a Shuckle or a Chudder?

udderly shuckalicious

or

Remember Chaka Khan?

Shuckle Udder

I always wonder, if you have to check a legit carry on bag cuz there's no room overhead, do they also charge you for it as well?

On some of the flights to Hawaii, they took some of the carry-ons and put them somewhere else in the cargo hold. After we landed, the bag was given back to you just as you got off the plane.

no charge.

I think, though, that if they say it's too big and you have to check it then you'd have to go back and pay any fees that you'd normally have to pay.

That's it for me tonight, breakdown of the last chapter might not happen 'til after the holidaze, but I'll be around.

 

[reelmom]

Your room is gorgeous. We are looking to stay there this summer for the first time. We have stayed at Portofino Bay before but we are hoping to get a really good AP rate for Royal Pacific. As my boys get older, they are starting to want to go to Universal more. Traitors!

 

[buzz1121]

Speaking of beavers, I had a unique opportunity to see a real beaver, up close last night. Nebo, I really was going to post about chapter 2 last night, but well Marlin Perkins had another adventure in mind for me! And for those of you with beaver around you, humor me and consider this a nature post in the TR.

My father has had increasingly serious problems with beavers. They dam his natural water supply, causing issues with irrigation for the collards and kale he grows this time of year. Anyway, we have not had many beaver historically in the midlands of SC, so my exposure to them has been limited to nature shows. Within the last ten years beavers have made their presence known in a big way.

My father has had to set out traps to catch them. On 12/19/12, he caught a huge 70 pound, 48 inch long beaver and he casually mentioned it to me the next day. I told him that the kids would like to see a beaver, heck I would like to see one in person. I got a call last night that he had indeed caught another beaver, this one more medium sized.

He brought the beaver over in the back of his truck. My first impression was that it looked just like a giant rat!

It's teeth were as brown as wood, the fur was very shiny and glossy, and the back feet were really thick with webbing. Up close, you can completely see that the feet literally function as paddles. The tail was impressive as well. I had imagined it would be almost rubbery and flexible, but it was actually hard, with a diamond like pattern similar to some snakes. The kids were impressed as was I. It totally justified my many hours of watching "Wild Kingdom" back in the day.

My dad has a pretty dry sense of humor and his parting quip was "Hey, it's not too late to consider adding it to our Christmas Dinner!"

Anyway, consider the wildlife/nature post complete. And hey Nebo, I know I missed posting about your chapter, but hey, I did receive an education and in true Neboite fashion, passed it on in the TR!!

 

[buzz1121]

I enjoyed the chapter Nebo! Your experience with your luggage being late completely rings true with me as this literally happens to me every single time I fly! This never happens to anyone else with me, just me, so I suspect it's a feat to be a part of this illustrious club.

I am really enjoyed your video walk through of your room at Universal. I actually rounded up the entire Buzz family so we could all behold the wonder of hearing someone speak with absolutely no discernable accent!

Your Uni/Dis breakdown is very interesting and I am looking forward to reading more. It would be fantastic if Disney had something similar to the Universal pass system for onsite guests, but I doubt that will happen. The Next Gen technology is supposed to offer enhancements so we'll see.

I was last at Universal eons ago, in fact the Hitchcock experience was still there during my last visit.

And Nebo/Pkondz, just for the record, shuckle and chudder just don't do it for me. They sound like words that should be used in connection with the scary Nebo photoshop pictures!

 

[jmm476]

Nebo, I was off the boards for a bit while we were at WDW and then had to stay away for a few days until my cloud of gloom dissipated because we don't have any trips scheduled for next year.... Anyway, I'm just catching up and I wanted to stay thanks for the video of the Royal Pacific. That is an awesome room! I'll have to remember that when we do get around to booking a trip with my stepdaughter. She really wants to go to Universal, obviously I haven't had enough of an influence on the kid...

Sent from my iPad using DISBoards

 

[margymas]

Speaking of beaver)

Ummmmmm ... Cough ........ Really?

 

[margymas]

Good pre show, the movie sucks though.
Dark, grainy, annoying moving seats.

"

Sounds vaguely like my sister's wedding .....

 

[buzz1121]

Ummmmmm ... Cough ........ Really?

And now Nebo and Pkondz, you have definitive proof that you two are not the only ones with your mind in the gutter! Just kidding Margy!!

The beaver I referenced above was the small plane Pkondz mentioned flying in once upon a time.

However, in my first job after college I worked as a CSR. In that job I ran across a name, and I am completely NOT kidding here, with the last name of the aforementioned mammal/plane, first name of Velvet.

What a way to limit future career aspirations!

 

[orangecats2]

Sorry I have been absent, DH gave me his plague (cold) for Christmas.

And I have been rereading If It's Tuesday... I'm reading everything this time instead of just skimming like I did last time. There's some good stuff in there. I was rolling when you talk about hitting the Japanese man. And did anyone know that Nebo could predict the future? Look, direct quote:

"I am really wondering what they're going to do with that "Legendery side" that was already started. My own guess is that if the mini-suites work out at All Star Music, the whole Legendary Years might be baby suites."

Now, can you give me some winning lottery numbers for tonight?

 

[jakeybake]

Finally all caught up! Work and Christmas getting in the way of the DIS but I had some time to catch up and am glad I did!

We did a Uni only trip a few April's back and we really enjoyed it, though we kind of got bored towards the end. Felt like it was hard to stretch a week out of everything. Stayed at the Hard Rock and felt it was up there with our beloved Beach Club!

Looking forward to the rest of your TR! Too bad I missed you guys at POP by a few days. Weather was great when I was there. Hope it was the same for you.

Merry Christmas to all my DIS pals!!

Jay

 

[pkondz]

We were told that our checked bags would be upchucked at
baggage claim number 4.

I like that. I'm gonna have to steal it.

The line... not the bag...

Wait... maybe the bag too.

Which goes over, around, back in, past the hole, and then returns to us.

There seem to be two types of baggage returners (three if you count dumping them all in a pile).
The first kind is an oval or circle that brings up the suitcase from the bowels of the airport and then the bag goes round and round.
The second kind is where the bag comes out from behind a curtain, follows a track for a while then disappears behind another curtain. Eventually, it comes out again.

I've always thought that while passengers are waiting and watching the bags come and go, there are baggage handlers on the other side watching as well.

"Hey, Bob. Here comes that big brown one with the orange ribbon again."
"Yup. That's what? It's second time through here?"
"Yeah. Let's take it off for a minute or two just to mess with people."
"Okay, you do that while I keep changing the order of the other bags."

Then it seemed more like a stage to me, with new performers joining the belt that got spit out from the hole in the wall.

That's what I think too!

We waited and watched the show.
It was pretty boring, I had a hard time following the plot but we were still a captive audience.

Which is why Bob and his friend occasionally take a bag off line.

Then we waited some more.
Wouldn't you think that two suitcased that were checked into the airport at the same time would end up being at least close to each other, in cargo?

You'd think that... and you'd be wrong. Pretty sure we've always had to wait for that last bag.

"Clutch Cargo, with Spinner and Paddlefoot will be right back!"
And nobody remembers that, do you?

I for one, do not. Pretty positive we didn't get it up here. Or at least my family didn't.

After a while, Diane went in search of assistance, I'd heard about countless stories from people with lost luggage, but it's never happened to us.

Never happened to us either. But I'm sure there was a sinking sensation in your gut going on.

Things are now coming out on station 4, and I'm running back and forth trying to watch both.

"Hey Bob, let's take some of these bags and start putting them over here!"

After she finishes her description, he says,
"You mean it looks like this one?"
And grabs my bag as it's just passing by.

I don't know where it came from.
I had been looking at the hole and did NOT see it spit up
another one!

That's weird. You'd think one of you would've seen it earlier. And I'm sure you weren't embarrassed in the least.

Turned out the bottome was busted up, that holds it in an upright position.

It's 6 days old, I just bought it last week, this is it's first trip.

From Wallmart.

A few years ago, I went to a higher end luggage store and bought Ruby some expensive luggage. The stuff is super lightweight and if it ever gets damaged (by you, the airline, the toothless cab driver.... doesn't matter) they'll fix it for free. If they can't fix it, they give you a new one.

We should have gone with Mears.
He even added in tolls, then when he pulled up at Doubletree, it was,,, "oh no, cash only, no credit cards accepted."

What a load of BS. I bet he could take plastic but can skim if he takes cash. Wouldn't you love to have a waiver that the driver has to sign before the trip starts stating that they will accept credit or you will not be liable for payment?

Or how about this, "So I owe you $30? And you won't take my credit card even though you said you could? No problem, I don't have any cash on me, but if you'll just wait half an hour or so, I should be able to get some cash for ya."

The Doubletree turned out to be a little fancier than I expected.

It looked pretty nice from the research I did.

If you are wondering why we are spending one night staying at the Doubletree, it's simple.
The next day is one of the busiest travel days, and expensive, of the year. We save 200 in air fare by leaving a day sooner.

I'm calling hogwash. Oh, sure, you probably told Smidgy that you could save $200 by going a day early. But factor in the cost for the extra hotel day, plus meals and any incidentals and you're probably breaking even at best or even losing money.

The real reason is you saw an opportunity to go a day early on vacation at little to no cost and grabbed it. Which is of course the smart thing to do anyway.

Biggest hot tub I've ever seen! You could swim laps in there if you wanted to.

Too bad you didn't take a snap of it. A large hot tub is a rare thing at a hotel.
Then again, I'd probably get annoyed if I'm trying to relax in the hot tub and every minute or two you come by doing laps.

I keep thinking I'm so much further south than in Chicago that it will be a big difference astronomy wise, but it's really just a drop in the celestial bucket I guess.

I always think the same thing too. But then I either don't look (not one single time in Hawaii) or it's not far away enough to make a difference I guess.

We nixed walking over to CityWalk at Universal, it wasn't quite as close as we were led to believe,

That's what I thought, when I mapped it. That's why I had you guys take the shuttle.

What a great Smidgy shot. Boy she sure looks happy!

Then she asked me if I was up for Yahtzee.

I feigned deafness.

Ah. Wise you are becoming.

You can't "call" a cab, cabs have to be "hailed"

"Oh hail Billy Joe, where's the durn cab?"

I had to read that twice before the nickel dropped.

I tried to sleet a cab once, nothing happened.

You just mist it.

I'll stop now.

You say that… but you never really do.

He then made what was close to a fatal mistake, as in, "the last thing he ever did" kind of mistake, when he went for my Carrion bag.

You know, the one that has my "prescription painkillers " in it.

"Touch that bag and you die!"

Very subtle.

OOOOHH, smoke, wonderful smoke, inhaling, deeply, exhale,,, OOOOH.

You forgot cough, hack, gag.

Ok, I'll be allright now.

Of course, ‘cause you quit.

And, it was READY at 9:30 in the morning!

To me, that’s more impressive then the upgrade itself. In my experience, rooms are never ready before noon.

Ready for the short tour? Turn up your speakers a bit to hear me. But all I ask is please after you view the video,
it's going to be really tempting to watch the other videos I took that will pop up, so, DON'T! No, really, takes the fun out of it then.

Two things.
1. I’ve never been the type to peak at the Christmas presents before December 25, so I didn’t even glance at the other vids.
2. Is Dianne’s maiden name Parkinson? She did a great Price is Right job for the chair by the window.

Isn't that the coolest thing?
Upgraded to a King Suite again! And we came because we got a PIN code for 40% off in the first place. Our room (s) is/are, costing us I think it was 134 a night!

Wow! Nice score!

The scale tipper though is that when you stay at a Uni resort, you get automatic fastpasses for everything, unlimited times, and that's the deal breaker.

That is a pretty sweet deal. I was telling Ruby about it and she was impressed too.

I hate when I have to have relations with other guests.

Next time, go when the parks are empty. It’ll make things a lot smoother for ya.

Then we went across the street to Shrek 3'D.

Apostrophe trademarked? :

Good pre show, the movie sucks though.
Dark, grainy, annoying moving seats.

You sure that wasn’t just you?

But Terminator 2, 3'D is the best of all of them, no arguments, case closed. I think Smidgy might choose Philharmagic, but she can write her own dang trip report.

We then had to hustle to get to the back for the next Beetlejuice Graveyard ReVUE. (Oh, Smidgy is going to be so proud I spelled it correctly)

A revue is a show you view, no?

Oh, that's right, I took a video. Crank it UP!

Yeah, and I’m sure the cute girls in the short skirts don’t hurt none, either.

I liked it when Dracula sang "I want a girl like Frankie's girl, where can I find a woman like that?"

What’s even funnier is that I have no idea if that was in the show or if you just made it up.

Next we are over at Disaster, which used to be Earthquake, and guess who got picked as a volunteer?

YOU! It was you, right? Right? It was, wasn’t it?

No, not me,

oh.

as br'er Rabbit says, " I learned my lesson" at the Indy Stunt Show, but Smidgy is leaving me now to join the cast. No kidding, if there is ANYTHING, any show, any attraction, ANYTHING AT ALL, she has gotten picked for it!
I'm surprised she hasn't flown down from the castle yet to start Wishes!

If that happens, I’m dropping everything and flying down there… umm… in a plane, that is… to see that.

I once got stepped on by PUSH, the talking trash can cuz he didn't see me.

The trash can didn’t see you, Kemosabe?

In the first pic she's way on the right side of the stage, sitting with a couple others;

Oh, boy! I can’t wait to see what happens next! This is gonna be awesome!!

Then I got her leaving when her role was done, which I'm still not exactly sure what that role was, except to sit on the far right side of the stage for awhile.

Okay. Not quite as awesome as I was expecting, but… Bravo, Smidgy. Well done. Hip, hip and all that.

There was a fifteen minute wait for the Mummy.

Ha! We flashed our cards and were on in 5.

Ha, score one for Uni. But is that the only time you used the cards that day?

I'm sorry, Space Mountain is just a Wild Mouse ride in the dark.

It’s been a long time, but…

Now I'm going to get people mad at me, but I choose The mummy as the winner, a lot better theming, cooler effects and generally more fun. It's also a longer ride, RRC doesn't last two minutes.

How could I get mad? I’ve got nothing to compare it with. I’ll take your word for it until I get the chance to see for myself, I guess.

Smidgy walked up with me, took my hat and glasses, and
I was muttering, "dumb husband, dumb husband" (smile ladyH)

:

Hey, I'm getting older, I heard heart attacks are no fun.

That’s so weird. I’ve heard the same thing.

I guess we'll call it quits there, so,
"To be continued"

Thanks for the chapter, dude! :

 

[pkondz]

Merrry Christmas to Nebo and Smidgy and all the rest of our DISfunctional family!