Opinions on turning our wedding into a Fairytale Elopement....

[LouisianaDisneyFan]

P.S. - My statement above about not lying does not come without experience... my mom-in-law wore a black MOURNING veil to our wedding and did an awful lot of horrible things before our nuptials. I am now her caregiver while she suffers from Alzheimer's, but we did enjoy a good relationship for many years before her decline in health. Things CAN improve with his family, but only if you are always honest and open... and always take the high ground. Again, I urge you, if you're going to elope, that is your decision, but lying to them changes it from a loving action between you and your fiance to an act of deceit. Don't give his family the satisfaction of that! ~Ev

 

[allisonswonderland]

While honesty is always the best policy- it does seem like being honest and saying we do not want you there but I want my mom there is going to create a much larger eruption than anything. I understand your point but I do not think that really gives Ashley much as far as options. And maybe Ashley could leave the itenerary for her mother to find, that would not make it a lie....not completely honest but not a lie...

 

[faeriegrl]

I wanted to let you know that we considered doing the same while there was still time and a part of me wishes we HAD eloped. The day before his mom was supposed to arrive, she called and said she wouldn't come. She caused all sorts of problems and it was so stressful. If you can do it, do it. The reason we didn't was because my hubby wanted his mom to be there (ironically enough) but she ended up showing.

Brittany

 

[WDWbride2007]

I say ELOPE!!! =)

 

[littleladykaty]

I'm so sorry to hear that your in-laws to be are being so ugly to you!!! I say ELOPE!! They can kiss your big toe!!! (disney edited...you know what i mean!) I nearly married into a family that was so hateful to me...they talked down to me, made comments about my body, my clothes, my everything to their son. Thankfully that didn't work out (they got their way...JERKS)

I have found that life is too short to swallow the hatefulness of others. Your wedding is about you and your sweetie...and while family diplomacy is important for long term, your wedding is about nothing but the joy of your union. Your fiance needs to let them know that their behaviour is unacceptable!!!!

head up and do what your heart says to do!
Best of luck and happy hugs
katy

 

[LUV2DZNEE]

I have to agree with LouisianaDisneyFan. Starting your marriage with a huge lie to your FDH's family is going to make any kind of civil relationship pretty much impossible. There's almost no way that FDH's family isn't going to find out that your mother was at the wedding. Although I kinda like the suggestion of another poster about your mom "just showing up", a lie is always difficult to cover for any length of time.

If FDH is OK with eloping, then you need to have a discussion with his family. Let them know that you don't think you are being treated with the respect you deserve as his future wife and if their attitude doesn't change drastically, you've BOTH decided to exclude them from the wedding. It won't be easy, but with his family already treating you poorly, I'm afraid your life around them won't ever be easy. You and FDH have to stand firm as a couple or his family will divide and conquer.