Opinions on Confrontations?

[jrt1176]

I've read some good posts on here about posters encountering rude behavior at parks. Such as people saving spaces in line, jumping ahead in line or infront of others at a parade, etc.

Now how does everyone feel about confronting these people?

Granted, no one wants to make a scene, especially if you're there with children! You dont want to take away from the happiness and magic!

But, at the same time, the rude people know this also! So, they know there will be minimal, if any, confrontation to their actions!

What do you all think is acceptable to say to these people or to do to them, such as not let them pass, get infront of you?

Obviously, no one wants to ruin anyone's time at WDW, but it's also hard to be a victim and just let this behavior go on at times, especially at the expense of your family and children!

 

[dqpowell]

Be polite. Often all it takes to resolve a problem is to ask a question or make a polite comment. If that fails, then what you do after that will depend on too many factors to outline here. Often the best approach -- as much as it might irritate you to contemplate here -- is to make do as best you can and try not to let the other person's bad behavior ruin your vacation/day/hour/whatever.

David

 

[Dominus]

I don't mind people saving place in line if they have kids. I know we've been in line for a while when one kid just has to go. I'm not sure if it's wrong to send one parent to the potty with the kid and hold their place, but I've done it. I have a problem with teens mostly. They sorta act like they're trying to catch up to someone. I haven't stopped anyone from passing me, but I've considered it. It's a case by case thing with me. If it were so obvious they had no business ahead of me, I'd stop them. I've done it in other places, just not WDW.

 

[BradyBz12]

I'm of the opinion "kill 'em with kindness" - keep your cool, be polite, stand your ground and try to be as reasonable as possible.

IMO if anyone is going to cause a scene, it's going to be the offending party, not me.

That being said, I'm not traveling with kids, and I think those with kids are in a slightly different position of not wanting to raise a big ol' stink in front of them (and understandably so!)

I think each person needs to do what's best for them and their situation. Depending on the circumstances, you can try talking to a CM, but don't count on that resolving the problem.

In the end I think it's best to realize that sometimes it's just not worth the headache and hassle and that we just have to let it go. I believe in karma and that the bad stuff some people put out there will come back to them eventually... without my help.

 

[bouncycat]

I have let MANY things go unconfronted, but there are 2 times that stick out in my mind where I actually "did" something about it, the first time was during a parade, this guy was REALLY being loud and obnoxious about his pregnant girlfriend who couldn't see, now mind you they got there RIGHT before the parade started, he was saying really bad words and hitting people in the head with his elbows trying to reach over and take pictures. I didn't like the language, or the hitting with the elbows, so I did a nice *ahem* friendly shove to get him off me!! it was the evening parade, I don't want some smelly stranger with his armpit in my head!! The other, well, I used a few choice words, it was the end of the night, it was a madhouse getting on the tram, as usual, this BIG cuban guy lined up his family of musta been 20 inbetween the tram cars, you know where it's chained off....well, he PUSHED my son out of the way to get on! My dh pushed him back, we got on, and they crammed on with us, I commenced to YELL at him for pushing my son. Do something to me all day long, but you touch my baby, then it's ON! Of the many things that really upset me, people stopping in front, saving places in line, etc. Those are the 2 that I actually did something about from 100 plus visits this past year. I just don't like getting into confrontations, especially at DW.

 

[mmexpress]

make do as best you can and try not to let the other person's bad behavior ruin your vacation/day/hour/whatever.

David

Well said.
I tend to over react when it's easier to let something go and get over it.
( I think David knows what I mean.)

 

[dqpowell]

( I think David knows what I mean.)

???

David

 

[Disneychix]

I felt a need to intervene when 2 older boys were in the kiddie pool at POFQ. That pool is so small and there were lots of babies (kids under 3) in there at the time. 2 boys maybe 10 and 12 yrs were jumping into the pool and splashing water everywhere. It was obvious that they had no parental supervision nearby. I pretty much told them to leave and go back to the big pool in a stern voice. Other parents applauded when they left.

Another time at the MK after a parade we were trying to get through Fantasyland and one lady was loudy complaining that I was being 'rude' and pushing her with my stroller. I wasn't doing anything on purpose and she kept yelling at me so I let her have it. I was totally done with being yelled at for no reason! I didn't scream obsenities or cause a scene but she was looking for a fight I think.

I also don't let rude teenagers get away with much around me. I'm the queen of the glaring 'look'. I know kids are kids but if they are going to be allowed to go off on their own in such a large public place then they should behave as well as any adult.

 

[Matt71]

I'm of the opinion that there are two kinds of rude people. Rude people that know exactly what they are doing and don't care, and people that don't realize that what they are doing is rude.

Now, the first group you can do nothing about. Whine and complain all you like - they won't care. Nothing you do or say will change their behavior or attitude. Even if they are thrown out of the park, it will not be their fault in their eyes. Giving them the evil eye, being snarky, being sarcastically nice... you're just making yourself like them.

Now, the second group you can do something about, but only if you do it right. Giving the evil eye, being snarky, etc. might make them feel bad, but it's also going to put them on the defensive which makes the situation a conflict. Your best bet is to be nice, legitimately nice. Talk to the person. Not about their behavior, but about their vacation or their kids. Ask them if they're having a good time. Once you have established a personal relationship with someone the likelyhood of them being rude to you diminishes.

The core of rude behavior is the feeling that you are the center of the universe. You have no connection to the people around you and thus feel no impact from their discomfort or pleasure; they are faces in the crowd, people you'll likely never see again... unconnected to you. Since making a connection with them runs the risk of feeling the impact of them having a "bad day", most people won't take that chance. Now, force someone to make that connection and you become more than a face in the crowd. They become invested in you and your feelings. So be nice, make a connection; you'll both be happier for it.

 

[PixieDust32]

Some people do get nasty and rude. I almost got into a fight with a mom because I asked her kid not to be runing in front of us while watching the AK parade. OK, we let the kid stand next to us because as usual people get there late and expect to have a great spot and the kids started crying because he couldn't see, my DH was sitting down with the video camera and the kid was next to him, DH was nice to let him stand right were his backpack was, well,half way into the parade the kid started to jump and was happy to see the parade, no big deal, but he was walking right in front of us and bumping the camera, knocked DD's popcorn, and the Mom didn't say anything, well, I asked him to please stop and to go back to his spot, well after the parade hell broke lose and the lady went nuts and stated yelling at me, she called me the B word and god knows what else because I walked away.

 

[dolphindan1]

I am of the opinion of just because we are in Disney doesnt give you a free pass to do what you want....I will approach things the same way I do at the local mall, at my house, work whatever...if it doenst affect my saftey or my families saftey and anyone else's saftey and I can let it slide I will....However if its something that directly affects me or my family expect to hear me....I will be nice at first but after that all bets are off...usually what I have encounteered is that most people are so wrapped up into the ride or show or parade that they forget about the things around them...usually a simple excuse or something will suffice....I have been guilty of this....

The worst thing for me is the 3-d show waiting areas, they cram 500 - 1000 people in the big room then funnel them to 4 or so regular size doors....I feel like cattle and I have seen people just push and knock people out of the way to be 1st in the row and plop down in the middle....drives me crazy....

 

[jcemom]

I'm a very non-confrontational sort of person, so I would almost never say anything. Usually I am happy if someone else does though.

We were in line for Aladdin's Carpets, oh, maybe three years ago. This was in January when lines were pretty short even midday. I think we waited two cycles to get on. A man came sent his two kids to pass us and the family in front of us, then he and his wife followed, sort of squeezing past and acting like they were trying to get their kids. Then when they got to the front they stopped and just stood there. They very obviously used their two small boys to cut the line. The boys were maybe 4 and 6, give or take a year.

The man in front of me said something to the guy. He wasn't yelling or anything but made it very clear that he knew the guy was line cutting and told the guy to go to the back. The guy (line cutter) then made a huge scene, yelling and hollering, and literally threw himself on the ground then screamed that he was punched. We were right there. He wasn't punched.

I was nearly in shock. I couldn't believe someone would behave that way, especially in front of a bunch of small children at Disney World. Wow.

After we rode security was waiting at the exit. They asked if we would tell them what we saw. We did. The last I saw they were leading the line cutter away and his family was following behind. Not sure what happened after that but luckily we didn't see him again.

 

[eliza61]

I'm the kill with kindness person also. The space savers don't really bother me as much as the line jumpers. Basically though unless some one's safety is jepordized I tend to let things slide off my back. For me, it really isn't worth the headache while I'm on vacation.
I actually only really confronted a "out of control" guest who literally verbally attacked the cm at the podium at TTS. she had the poor women intears, why? because she didn't have an adr and was told it was an hour wait. Security ended up being called.

 

[mickeyluv'r]

It depends. Sometimes I say nothing, sometimes I glare, sometimes I'll say, "ExCUSE me!?!?" as a question, which often gets the point across. Soemtimes I'll tell a CM if the situation warrents as well.

Sometimes, in the real world, when I speak up the clerk looks at me like I'm the one who was rude when someone tires to cut in front of me. I've even had them apologize to the other person, which really gets my gall.

So sometimes the best thing is to let it go.

Once I was at a pharmacy on Christmas Eve. The woman in front of me was upset about having to wait in line and get turning around and complaining, trying to make everyone behind her aggitated as well. AFter she said her peace to the clerk, and was ou tof the way...I somewhat loudly (so the folks behind me could hear) said to the clerk, "Thank you so much for working on Christmas Eve, I'm sure there's other things you'd rather be doing right now!" The clerk almost had tears in her eye. The people behind me also chimed in and thanked her after my turn was over.

I think we made up for her a little bit.

There's a quote in Splash Mtn we sometimes like to quote while at WDW...

"Some critters ain't never gonna learn!"

 

[JulyGirl]

Granted, no one wants to make a scene, especially if you're there with children! You dont want to take away from the happiness and magic!

But, at the same time, the rude people know this also! So, they know there will be minimal, if any, confrontation to their actions!

No, the rude people usually have no idea of their rudeness and think that WE are the ones with the problems. If at all possible, I go with the motto of, "You can't argue with a fool." If I simply MUST say something, I try to go with the sweet and simple routine, keeping the fake smile plastered on my face. I refuse to let the rude ones spoil my day.

 

[Finkelstein's Hubby]

"You cant argue with a fool" Now thats a great attitude.

I have never seen some of the wild behaviour I have read about on other threads, thankfully, but this last trip was the first time I had to say something to a nuisance teen. He must have jumped the queue at some point on TSM and was using me as a shield when the CM came hunting. Eventually I grew sick of his going back and forth so I just confronted him about what he was doing, he dropped behind me and that was the end of it...............but I had gotten so rattled by having to deal with it that what was in effect a minor issue meant I never really enjoyed the ride.

After that I decided to chill and not get het up again......my two weeks of fun are too precious to spoil it with worrying over an eejit!

 

[Lynn5700]

I have never had one but I do notice them..like people holding spots on the curb for parades or people meeting in lines...I see people freak out but it really does not bother me. I'm too happy to be there to let stupid childish behavior bother me lol. sometimes I laugh though at peoples behavior and most of them are adults freaking out on adults.

 

[dolphindan1]

"You cant argue with a fool" Now thats a great attitude.

But its so true....

 

[jrt1176]

I want to say that I agree, most who are rude at WDW have no idea they are being rude. So, that can be handled with a polite comment if need be...

I usually shrug off most things, because it doesnt bother me. My family has always gone at our own pace at WDw and are rarely, if ever, in a hurry to get somewhere.

However, this next trip will be my first with my 3 y/o niece. I want her to have the best time possible, of course! I will respect others, as always, but with my niece with me and I be more concerned about her happiness. I dont plan on calling people out on things, but you never know the situation. I guess it would depend on if it effected my niece and to what degree.

For parades, we'll probably not be up front. I'll want her to see it, but she can see from a distance too and I dont really want to be stuck on one spot with difficulty leaving if need be.

I enjoyed the comments and replies in this thread. I think everyone on this site is about having a good time. Confrontation is something you want anywhere, especially at WDW, unless it is needed. I doubt anything will come up, but you never know anymore.

 

[kgle]

Some people do get nasty and rude. I almost got into a fight with a mom because I asked her kid not to be runing in front of us while watching the AK parade. OK, we let the kid stand next to us because as usual people get there late and expect to have a great spot and the kids started crying because he couldn't see, my DH was sitting down with the video camera and the kid was next to him, DH was nice to let him stand right were his backpack was, well,half way into the parade the kid started to jump and was happy to see the parade, no big deal, but he was walking right in front of us and bumping the camera, knocked DD's popcorn, and the Mom didn't say anything, well, I asked him to please stop and to go back to his spot, well after the parade hell broke lose and the lady went nuts and stated yelling at me, she called me the B word and god knows what else because I walked away.

You probably would have been better off letting his mother know instead of "scolding" him. Regardless of what my son does, I refuse to let strangers tell him what to do. I would have appreciated someone telling me he was causing a ruckus rather than hear someone tell him not to do something ya know? Now, she still may have went off on you but you never know.