disney junky
BWV
- Joined
- Dec 16, 2004
- Messages
- 3,645
Is this a problem for any couples who have been in the situation? Resentment from the working one towards the retired one?
I wonder about this sometimes. My DH will retire 10 years before I do, if all goes according to plan. I will have certain expectations about him taking over many of the household tasks that are currently my responsibility (even though he may not know it yet).Is this a problem for any couples who have been in the situation. Resentment from the working one towards the retired one?
My DH retired in August. We always have maintained specific roles in ur home, and while I was home I maintained all of the indoor tasks, as well as the gardens that I had. DH worked and did all outdoor work. Now he is home and we have continued in much the same way. I do not resent that he is not cleaning or cooking. I am pretty territorial in those areas. He makes sure there are no dishes in the sink. He empties the dishwasher, keeps the house picked up.
I know that our arrangement would not work for some folks, but so far we are okay with it.
That's really all that matters. I'm going to *make* my DH cook because I hate the drudgery of it all and the years of doing it. Granted, he's solely taken care of all the outside stuff, half the laundry, and other things. But I am so tired of having to come home every day and fix dinner. And plan dinner. I just *hate* it.
Your Social Security number isn't going to go very far. You'll need Social Security paymentswhereas I will be more dependent on SSN, so
EDH is not opposed to helping in the kitchen, it is me who is struggling. I have decided to try a real meal plan, which I always used before, and see how that goes.
Rachael Ray has, or had, a show on Food Network Sunday mornings where she cooked for an entire week at a time.
DH retired a year ago at 55. Took the package and pension cut. I‘m 44 and upped my hours to almost full-time ( professional job) so we are about even again. No resentment as he does a lot of house stuff and taxis kids. 12 and 13. helps more with math etc. only thing is he could do some more housework. Though I can‘t complain. I just get annoyed having him home all the time. I work from home and miss having the house to myself. So he now does shopping and errands. Worse are only comments from others. We live in a small town. Jealously as he is at home with a great pension ( people know this as his employer is known for that) . While others need to work 20 more years and will get less.Is this a problem for any couples who have been in the situation? Resentment from the working one towards the retired one?
Sounds like us! DH 12 yrs older. I work snd commute 2.5 hrs each way when I go in. Mostly Home office thank God. And kitchen laundry is his thing!DH is almost 12 years older than I am - he's almost 62. He didn't so much retire as got downsized from his tenure-track university position and hasn't been able to get another position. He does substitute teach and teaches private music lessons, and gets retirement from the military (National Guard).
I figure I've got another 20 years of work ahead of me. I have a 2-hour commute each way, each day. I take the 4:55 a.m. train and get home at 6 p.m. every day. But my income is amazing and I like my job.
He keeps in shape (bicycles) and keeps up with the kitchen and laundry, although I make a majority of the dinners. It works well for us.
This past summer we started testing out the meal plans that include all of the ingredients -- Blue Apron, Plated, etc. There are a huge number of them, and the first trial week is generally 50% off. We've settled on Sun Basket (and HelloFresh). It's convenient and gives him an opportunity to make a meal or two a week with ingredients we wouldn't normally think of using.