I left off with Tommy and I heading westward. Ho.
To Frontierland. Hand in hand.
We were needing to get us some Zipply Do Dah. Badly. Zipply Do Dah is what Tommy calls Splash Mountain. It is one of his favourite rides. The rest of the happyhaunts agree. And we usually spend plenty of time riding it again and again. That. As well as BTMR.
Because we're usually stuck in Frontierland which I also call "Hotel California".
And... there's no pink champagne on ice.
Unfortunately.
But... my mind IS tiffany-twisted, I've got the mercedes bends, and a lot of pretty pretty boys. That I call friends.
Except for the "pretty" part.
OH.
On our mission we were momentarily sidetracked.
By a rare vision. For us anyway.
Brer Fox.
Now some folks say Brer Fox was no 'count and good for nothing.
But... we didn't think so.
Mostly b/c there was not much of a line to see him. So we decided to get a lil character greetin' time in.
I got my trusty camera ready and Tommy went in for the kill.
Got the hug.
I got the picture.
And then Tommy did this:
Put his hand right in Brer Fox's mouth. Stroked his tongue. And checked out his fangs.
Which is not uncommon for Tommy b/c he often tries to greet strange dogs in the same manner. So we have to be on our toes. He only comes with ten fingers. Five on each hand. And we happyhaunts would like to keep it that way.
Also... Tommy is Canadian. Which means a lot less summer and sunshine than the folks down Disney way. We worry about scurvy, appreciate a good tan and a nice set of choppers. So...he was checking for the ravages of scurvy.
I think.
I'm pleased to note that Brer Fox had NO spongy bleeding gums, sores or missing teeth. Although... I'm not sure Brer Fox appreciated the examination. Yet... he did not sever Tommy's hand at the wrist. He merely stood up and stepped back and away from my little dentist.
With that fun and magical moment over we headed to Splash Mountain to check out the wait. We decided to grab some Fastpasses and our return time was in about an hour.
SCORE!!!
Tommy said he wanted to ride BTMR so we headed over there and got into line.
The line moved pretty fast.
And when it didn't... I did this:
This:
And this:
Yep. I was thinking that the person in line in front of Me(l) REALLY should be seeing their doctor about that.
Moving ON. Dotting com.
We rode us some fine rollercoaster. A rollercoaster perfect for people who don't really like to ride rollercoasters.
Oh. It's REAL fun and very well themed and all that. Just a little lame.
As rollercoasters go.
But... Tommy loves it and we always scream goin' UP the hills. And not DOWN. Which makes it funner. Yep. Funner.
We rode it twice. Spotted some Hidden Mickeys. And headed back to Splash Mountain.
Where we were a bit early for our Fastpasses and so Tommy got to do something NEW. And EXCITING.
He played in the little shady playground area there.
It was something we'd NEVER stop to do with all the troops in tow. So this was the perfect opportunity.
He made fast friends with a little girl and they chased each other around giggling.
A low maintenance moment of Frontierland fun. A NEW thing for us.
Then we headed onto the ride. Smelling the smell of Splash Mountain. And loving IT!!!!
Ahhhh. The smell of dirty stale Disney water.
It brings tears to my eyes.
The day started to get brighter for Me(l).
Splash wasn't all that busy and Tommy and I ended up in the front seat of our log. With a single male rider in the very back seat.
We talked and laughed and pointed. Yelled "BEAR BUM", "BRER BUM" and "BARE BRER BEAR BUM!!!".! At Brer Bear's vast furry hindquarters.
You know the spot. In the ride.
Don't you?
And when it was time to go down the drop. Tommy stood up. I wrestled him into a headlock of sorts. And we dove.
DOWN BAYBEEE!!!!
Screaming all the way!!!!
Like Mellyman does.
NOMellyman.
We got a little SPLASHED and finished the ride by finding the way cool Hidden Mickey cloud.
I won't tell you where tho.
Then we hurried to get our picture.
B/c we ALWAYS buy the Splash Mountain photo.
Unfortunately we couldn't find us????!!!!
We finally realized that OURS was the one that said "Washed AWAY".
What?
Whattheheck???!!!!
There were only THREE people in our log.
How'd we get washed away?
I finally realized the lone male rider musta done something. Behind us. Which was worthy of getting us all washed away.
Dude.
So blockhead.
For a second I wondered what he had done? Maybe he raised his shirt and showed his man-breasts? On Flash Mountain.
Whatever.
Anyhow, we didn't have the photo and I swore if we saw him again I would UNLEASH HELL on him.
B/c of it.
But... now it's Snack Time. And we headed for the cart. Thingie.
I bought Tommy one Itsakadoozie!!!
Which was a great thrill for him.
B/c although we have popsicles at home. I make them myself.
With water.
And call them: Itsnotakadoozie.
I watched him start to eat it. And then realized he was making a HUGE mess.
The coloured sticky treat was melting at a unbelievably fast rate and dripping down his hand and arm. Onto his shirt and shorts.
I made him remove his shirt. Sit down. And begin again.
I sat down beside him and watched the Itsakadoozie run down his chin, his neck, his little white chest and then pool on the top of his little round baby belly. Until it flowed down one side.
I was rummaging through our knapsack for wipes when THE THING happened.
Oh yeah.
THE LUCKY THING!!!!
The thing that turned our day right around!!!!
It was this: A bird pooped on my leg.
A BIG bird.
And suddenly it looked like a couple of mustard packets had exploded.
All over me.
Tommy looked down. I looked down.
We looked at each other.
Both covered in our respective messes.
And yelled at each other: WHOOOOO HOOOOOO!!!!
We also high fived.
B/c this is a sign of GOOD LUCK!!!
You see I OFTEN, since childhood, get targeted by flying poopbombers.
And my Baba, my General's mom, used to tell me something about it. But she didn't speak a lot of english. A lot of the time. So... roughly translated it means: "It's good luck if your chicken poops in your pot."
I SWEAR.
That's the translation.
And so... now we view the whole bird bombing thing as a good omen.
It happens to Beth plenty too.
And this is the BEST way to avoid a crying meltdown and massive fit.
Thanks, BABA!!!! Love you, miss you.
So now... with this happy magical moment under our belts... we decided to get wiped up. Both of us. Put our shirts back on.
Errr... Tommy's shirt. Only.
And head out of Frontierland. If we could. Head for our first ride on the NEW and IMPROVED Pirates of the Caribbean!!!!! NOWalt.
We motored off at quite a pace. Passing other guests and yelling "ARRRGGHHH!!!!"!!!!
Slapping our hands over one eye and doing ~ Pirate Eye.
Yelling "ARRGGHHHH!!!!". Some more.
What I'm sayin' is this: People cleared a path for us.
There's nothing like appearing a little unstable. To get you through a crowd. Quickly.
And...the last thing I remember, I was running past a General Store.
I had to find that tunnel back, by the Tiki Tropics Store.
'RELAX!' said a CM.
You are programmed to BELIEVE.
You can check out anytime you like... but you can NEVER leave!!!!
Cheers, Mel.
I have been reading your reports for a while and I just love them. You are one funny chica. Oh yeah, thank god you guys left when you did. A week later was when we here in Buffalo had our BIG SURPRISE storm 
