I haven't shared this with many people, but after reviewing it again it doesn't seem too personal. Here is my list of expectations for a man. My therapist assigned it as homework. There is no way I could have made this list at 19 when I got engaged...
WHAT I AM LOOKING FOR IN A MAN
NEEDS:
1.We must have a deep emotional, physical, and spiritual connection be in love.
2.He must have a kind soul be loving, thoughtful, and respectful of me and others.
3.He must value being a husband and a father.
4.He must want to spend time with me (eat dinner together, sleep together, vacation together).
5.He must be willing to work on our relationship (open communication, joint problem-solving, willingness to seek therapy if needed).
6.He must be able to maintain a balance between work, family and his friends/interests.
7.He must view our relationship as a partnership shared decision-making, joint finances, agreed upon household tasks, shared parenting responsibilities.
8.He must enjoy kissing and be good at it!
9.Our sexual relationship must be mutually satisfying and we need to be able to communicate openly about sexual issues.
10.He must be faithful.
11.He must be able to express his feelings towards me tell me he loves me through his words and actions.
12.He must be financially responsible have a job, pay bills on time, enjoy spending money occasionally but not be financially impulsive.
13.He must be bright.
14.He must respect my profession.
15.He must like and fully accept my furbabies.
16.He must enjoy traveling.
17.He must be emotionally healthy no significant mental illness, addictions, personality disorders, or criminal history.
18.He must typically have a positive mood and be optimistic.
19.We must have at least a partly shared sense of humor.
20.He must be self-confident, but not cocky.
21.He must be socially adept someone who typically gets along well with others.
DESIRES:
1.I want a man in his 30s to whom I am initially attracted likely someone who is tall, dark, and well dressed.
2.I want a man who is very physically attracted to me!!
3.I want a man who is physically fit and enjoys staying that way.
4.I want a man who enjoys making birthdays/anniversaries special.
5.I want a man who has healthy relationships with his family.
6.I want a man who likes my family and enjoys spending time with them.
7.I want a man who is well educated, but not too intellectual.
8.I want a man who is happy with his job or is willing to make a change if he is not.
9.I want a man who is responsible in taking care of his home.
10.I want a man who respects my love of Disney and would enjoy taking our children to themeparks.
11.I want a man who values having shared friends.
12.I want a man who is adventurous (i.e. likes roller coasters, is willing to parasail, scuba dive, etc.).
OK, now who thinks I am crazy?
