Off Topic - Nerf Gun toys

[scrapquitler]

Looking for some objective advice from other parents.

My son is asking for those nerf guns for his 9th birthday this month and I'm really on the fence....

Background: My husband and I have some liberal views and some conservative views.... consider ourselves "middle of the road'. When it comes to guns, we lean left. We don't own guns. We are not into hunting. We try to be mindful of the content our kids get exposed to on tv/movies/computer.

That being said, I did play with toy guns as a child. My parents have the same political leanings as we do now, but never saw toy guns as a problem. For example, when we went to WDW when I was 4, they bought my brother (6 at the time) and I the little Davy Crockett pistols. We loved them. We had plastic, realistic looking toy guns that would rattle when you pulled the trigger. We'd run around with the neighbor kids playing cops/robbers, etc. We had squirt guns, etc. It was all pretend and we knew the difference.

Thinking about the toys we already have -- we have tons of Lego City police sets which have guns (cops and robbers) and we have some Playmobil Western sets which have rifles, etc. I have some farther left leaning friends who wouldn't buy these types of toys for their kids due to the guns. To me that is pushing it. Yet, I also have friends who take their 4 year olds to see Avengers, Iron Man and the like which I wont' even take my 8 yo to because I think it's too much exposure to violence. They are PG-13 and just too realistic/intense.

So - Nerf Guns. My boys discovered them when visiting a friends house and they had an absolute ball playing with them. Now my son would really like them for his birthday. Part of me thinks - sure, they are for fun.... but then part of me cringes at the thought of my kids playing with them. I can't shake the thoughts of school shootings.

Am I over thinking this??? What are your thoughts? I know there are a lot of parents who have a "No toy gun" policy - does that include these nerf ones? What about squirt guns?

I think you talk to your kids about the danger of weapons and safety, and then buy them the Nerf Guns and the bright orange water blaster guns and let them have fun. The honest reality is that if you aren't buying them the nerf guns, at some point they are going to use a stick, their finger or some pop tart bitten into the shape of a gun to play shootem up games with their friends. I would NOT buy anything realistic looking, but Nerf Guns and the water blasters sure don't look realistic to me.

 

[SpaceMtMan]

Nerf guns are fun.

Guns are not.

IMO, the best way to teach any kid about gun safety is to take them shooting. Show them the seriousness of guns. You can only say so much, hands on with a gun will best teach them best.

We've used them throughout the childhood, its just a fun thing to do. Don't take it too seriously

 

[Granny square]

Nerf guns are fun.

Guns are not.

IMO, the best way to teach any kid about gun safety is to take them shooting. Show them the seriousness of guns. You can only say so much, hands on with a gun will best teach them best.

We've used them throughout the childhood, its just a fun thing to do. Don't take it too seriously

I'd say guns are fun too. We target shoot and one of my sons is going to school on a shooting scholarship.

Lots of dangerous things are fun.

Nerf guns aren't entry guns. They don't lead anyone to go out and shoot people or pets. They are just a chance to aim and tag as someone stated. No head shots allowed here.

 

[bumbershoot]

Sunday around noon, I was terrified but more in shock when it happened.
Here's my news interview http://m.ksl.com/index/story/sid/25621535 *embarrassing* if that doesn't work quite right it's the 6PM:Neighbors describe relationship story. I really hope he just pleads guilty and I don't have to testify - I went back to the police department yesterday after work and talked with a detective who took my statement again
I slept better last night than the night before, I'm back at work - just trying to maintain normalcy

I watched it. You definitely look shaky! Lovely, though.

And I didn't realize the father in law was still alive; while it sounds like he'll have a lot to go through, I'm glad for that.

We don't allow Nerf guns because they're obnoxious. The little ammo bits end up everywhere and then they get lost or ruined and it's expensive to keep replacing them and... just not dealing with the whole mess.

We allow squirt guns, outside, both parties armed and consensual only.

FWIW, that hasn't been our experience. The darts and discs for the ones DS has are pretty strong material, and very different than the darts from my cousins' older sets. I think they are making the stuff a little stronger.

Losing them is the reason we ONLY do it in an enclosed area where the darts/discs are easy to find.




OP, when you said you were worried about shootings, did you mean it the way I took it, which is wanting to be respectful of shootings and not participate in something that might be scary to someone else, or did you mean you were worried that using the Nerf would CAUSE your child to become someone who will become someone who does that?

 

[DisneyMomma81]

I watched it. You definitely look shaky! Lovely, though.

And I didn't realize the father in law was still alive; while it sounds like he'll have a lot to go through, I'm glad for that.

Thanks. Yes, luckily he turned his head right as it happened!

He truly is a evil looking degenerate.

 

[mrsr2ro]

OP here -- thank you all for the input.

I've decided not to get them .... for now. I'm not ruling them out entirely but I am just personally comfortable with them yet. I do appreciate all of your opinions and took them to heart.

I do want to clarify that I did not think that playing with nerf guns would turn my son into a future killer. Many other factors at play for someone to turn into that. Tons of kids play with toy guns and turn out fine.

I guess it's my own personal discomfort of being reminded of things like Newtown when reading the descriptions of the toys. They are all about glorifying "maximizing your firepower" and "unleasing a hailstorm of darts" etc.... my kids only know a little bit about what happened in CT, so it wouldn't affect them... but I did read the news and for me, it's just too fresh. It's the first thing I think of when reading about the toys. I'm a little crazy? Probably.

The poster who brought up the buzz ride -- great point. "shooting" is highly ingrained in our culture. I know that. Impossible to eliminate. I just felt there was a difference between fashioning a weopon out of a stick or legos and getting something that truly does mimic an automatic weopon in many aspects. (Maximum ammo capacity! Maximum firepower! etc)

There is also the fact that I have younger children as well, and while it's easy for a newly 9 and my 7yo son to understand not to shoot at people's faces, and set rules, etc.... a little harder to enforce with a 3 and 4 year old. You can tell them not to, doesn't mean they will listen.

So again - thank you for all the responses!

 

[letsgoreds]

There is also the fact that I have younger children as well, and while it's easy for a newly 9 and my 7yo son to understand not to shoot at people's faces, and set rules, etc.... a little harder to enforce with a 3 and 4 year old. You can tell them not to, doesn't mean they will listen.

I just wanted to address this part. Many of the Nerf guns (and super-soaker water guns) are harder to load and shoot, so you won't have as much of that problem with the 3 and 4yo.

Personally, my favorite post was the family that doesn't buy them because they are tacky and messy. That is so true. So many pieces and darts. We have the smaller ones, that maybe hold up to 8 darts. They can really be a lot of fun (setting up targets/etc.). When DS7 is playing, there is really nothing violent about it. We have the no shooting at people (especially heads) or animals rule. Never had a problem...except the darts occasionally getting stuck in our foyer light ; )

I draw the line with the video games. It really bothered me when DS7 had a friend in pre-K (they were 5) who was allowed to play COD (Call of Duty) on his dad's phone.

 

[CuteAndFluffy]

OP--Just wanted to give you a "Way to go, Mom!" for sticking to your...oh...um...guns.

Seriously, I am happy for you that you've given the matter such careful consideration and have figured out where your comfort zone is. You are a really thoughtful and thinking parent--something to be admired and emulated.

And a WTG to the group for keeping the discussion of a sensitive subject so positive! WooHoo!

 

[bumbershoot]

I draw the line with the video games. It really bothered me when DS7 had a friend in pre-K (they were 5) who was allowed to play COD (Call of Duty) on his dad's phone.

. DS has gran turismo (top gear edition), a clone wars game, and the rest are Lego games. That's all we'll do, and frankly I don't care for the clone wars one.

My 5 yr old cousin did have a harder time with the nerf blasters, that's for sure. and she got really upset and emotional when she got hit, which changed the tone of the game. So it's probably a good idea to hold off with the youngers there.

 

[lvchiqui]

imo boys will eventually play guns with anything

 

[mikehn]

I play with my son's nerf machine gun. Those things take like a 30 round clip. I can see why little boys want one. They are fun!

 

[samacita]

Looking for some objective advice from other parents.

My son is asking for those nerf guns for his 9th birthday this month and I'm really on the fence....

Background: My husband and I have some liberal views and some conservative views.... consider ourselves "middle of the road'. When it comes to guns, we lean left. We don't own guns. We are not into hunting. We try to be mindful of the content our kids get exposed to on tv/movies/computer.

That being said, I did play with toy guns as a child. My parents have the same political leanings as we do now, but never saw toy guns as a problem. For example, when we went to WDW when I was 4, they bought my brother (6 at the time) and I the little Davy Crockett pistols. We loved them. We had plastic, realistic looking toy guns that would rattle when you pulled the trigger. We'd run around with the neighbor kids playing cops/robbers, etc. We had squirt guns, etc. It was all pretend and we knew the difference.

Thinking about the toys we already have -- we have tons of Lego City police sets which have guns (cops and robbers) and we have some Playmobil Western sets which have rifles, etc. I have some farther left leaning friends who wouldn't buy these types of toys for their kids due to the guns. To me that is pushing it. Yet, I also have friends who take their 4 year olds to see Avengers, Iron Man and the like which I wont' even take my 8 yo to because I think it's too much exposure to violence. They are PG-13 and just too realistic/intense.

So - Nerf Guns. My boys discovered them when visiting a friends house and they had an absolute ball playing with them. Now my son would really like them for his birthday. Part of me thinks - sure, they are for fun.... but then part of me cringes at the thought of my kids playing with them. I can't shake the thoughts of school shootings.

Am I over thinking this??? What are your thoughts? I know there are a lot of parents who have a "No toy gun" policy - does that include these nerf ones? What about squirt guns?

Haven't read other replies; I'm sure you've gotten a range of answers. For us, the rules are simple: no weapons of any kind. Period. That means no guns, no toy guns, no squirt guns, no turning your finger into a pretend gun, as well as not using other toys/objects as any other kind of weapon. Plain and simple. No politics involved, just house rules that violence, and any hint toward violence, will not be tolerated.

 

[samacita]

Just a quick aside: I did go back and read other posts just now and am pleasantly surprised how civil the discussion has been. Yay!! Nice work, everyone.

 

[mummabear]

I've read some pretty interesting articles that have talked about how kids will play with "guns" whether you give them toy ones or not-they will just use their finger or a stick. We use our nerf guns for games like target pratice (using tape on a window) and as they get older would keep an eye on the context of their play.

 

[Jedana]

I play with my son's nerf machine gun. Those things take like a 30 round clip. I can see why little boys want one. They are fun!

We have two of those. And two of the single shot guns. And two with 8 clip holders. And just one of the "revolver" type, that holds like 6 shots.

And 2 of the disk shooters. One holds a lot, the other like 8. those hurt if shot dead on, but fun to shoot down the hall and around corners! DS likes to hide down the hall and ambush DH when he comes in from work. Figuring out the angles needed to shoot down a crooked hall (looks like a backwards capital L) is tough!

We also have water guns. 5 or 6, including 2 of the HUGE ones.

DS has a BB gun. DH has 5 or 6 airsoft rifles and guns; but his are the high powered ones that can seriously injure someone.

We also own guns, including DS (9) who has a .22 rifle. Oh, and DS has a real bow. He wants a compound boy, but we have to wait for him to get a little bigger--he struggles with the small one he has now (draw is tough for him).


Our DS has been taught gun safety since he was little. He understands (and has since he was about 5) which guns are toys and can be used with others, and which ones are not to be played with.


Guns are a personal choice that each family has to make, and ours is that we own and use them.
(And yes, I do let DS's friends parents know that we do have guns in the house before they come over, that they are locked away in our bedroom, and that my bedroom is off limits to any children. If they want to shoot DS's BB gun, the parents have to give me the ok. I'll sit in the back and watch them shoot the little clay targets. If the parents don't want the kids to play with any guns--including nerf and water--that's ok...they have plenty of other things to play with.)

 

[WantToGoNow]

When ds12 was little, I was on the "no toy gun" side of the fence. He was allowed none period. Then as he got older, everything became a gun - fingers, legos, play doh, etc. When he was 6-7 I got him his first Nerf gun. We had a lot of fun and eventually we all had them. Last year for Christmas he got a bb gun. He loves it and has shot it at nothing other than the target we made. I mentioned getting a gun for protection purposes and he was very adamant that we not have a gun in the house because they are dangerous. Even children know the difference between and a toy and a weapon. Personally, I can't think of a single 9 year old boy that I know that does not have atleast 1 Nerf gun.

 

[Angel Ariel]

zombie thread alert..

 

[ajwolfe]

We are a Nerf gun loving family and have been since my boys were old enough to first one them. They get played with frequently in our house (with or without bullets/discs/arrows in them). No head shots are allowed but otherwise it's free game.
My boys also own bb guns and are allowed to participate in youth deer hunting with their father. All real guns are kept under lock and key. They definitely understand the difference between a toy gun and a real one. Even based on appearance most Nerf guns come no where near close to resembling a real gun.
I think you will find as your boys get older it's going to be harder and harder to keep them from playing with a gun or at the very least pretending they have one. Nerf guns are a typical boy toy and I can't think of one household in our circle of friends that don't have at least one version of it.

 

[BabyHabs]

I have no problem with nerf guns. Your kid will not become a school shooter because of nerf guns or water guns. These kids have issues far deeper than that.

 

[Aliceacc]

I am absolutely NOT a gun person.

But I think there's a world of difference between aiming a Nerf gun at a target and being the lead story on the 5 o'clock news.

Aiming that Nerf gun at a tree or a target is no different than a pitcher trying to find the strike zone.

It's up to you to set the parameters for use if you do choose to get them. I think that if you agree that the Nerf guns, like balls, are NOT to be aimed at people, I think you'll be OK>