O/T what do you do when your life falls apart??

[elisebutt]

As I mentioned earlier in the family album thread, my dh and I have been having a rocky time. Just found out he's been seeing someone else since Xmas and he intends to move in with her soon.

This isn't too much of a shock as we were arranging an amicable divorce anyway. As we had arranged to go our separate ways I decided to start dating again and met a really nice guy - nothing serious - just someone to pay attention to me. Anyway Dh decides to go all jealous and now is refusing to look after the kids etc etc. AAAGH!!

Sorry this is not in keeping with the WISH - I have not eaten in 3 days - just so upset with the ways he's acting, can't face food, surviving on water, coffee and cigarettes.

 

[kdibattista]

I'm so sorry you are going through this... HUGS to you!!!! Please try and eat something and keep yourself healthy.... for your kids sake. Stay strong!!!

 

[wovenwonder]

But this is WISH related Elise --- you need your WISH friends to remind you how important it is to keep your body nurished with healthy foods especially during times like this when you are feeling very down. You need the healthy vitamins you get from eating to keep your emotional health in check. Do it for your lovely kids Elise! Please work on grabbing something healthy for your body (and your mind) at least 3 times today.

You know that we are all here for each other Elise!

 

[loisg1]

Elise - I agree with what's already been said. You need to feed your body properly. Do you find that exercising helps you to deal with the stress of what you're going through? Your children need you to stay strong.

Wishing you the best-
Lois

 

[TigH]

{{{{{{{{{{{{{Elise}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

Remember, you are in control! You are taking good care of yourself, you are following a great program that is allowing you to get back into a healthy lifestyle, feel good about yourself, how you look, how much energy you have, pat yourself on the back for all these great accomplishments. Please do not let one person's immature (double standard) behavior take this power and these good feelings away from you.

Now that you've had a few days to go through a range of emotions, pick today to straighten yourself up. YOU can do it! You don't need anyone, you are a very independent, caring, wonderful, lovely, STRONG, responsible person. Don't let him have this kind of hold on you. Figure out what YOU can do to make your life easier, try to pretend he isn't there so that you have to figure out how to cope with everything on your own and KNOW that you can do it!

Worrying never solves a thing. What you should do is make some decisions (wishy-washy thinking gets you no where too...) so splash some cold water on your face, MAKE YOURSELF EAT SOMETHING ON YOUR PLAN, put your thinking cap on and come up with some decisions that will benefit YOU and the kids. I'm telling you, once you start making decisions, you will feel so great and back in control. It's very empowering, like when you decided to get your old body back and get into this healthy lifestyle thing!

Hang in there. I know you are too clever to let this keep you down for long. It's just a changing point in your life, you need to figure out how to adjust and then move on from here. Everything will be different after today and it will just get better and better. Keep your eye on the prize - know in your heart that no matter what, you deserve great things and great things will come to you. Only the best for my Elisebutt!!!

Hugs, Karen xo

 

[KathyTX]

Elise, I am so sorry you're going through all this. I wish you weren't so far away from most of us! If you were here, we could have a little hen party and work some of this out of your system

Let's see, what do I know about Elise?

Elise has a wickedly sharp sense of humor. Sometimes slightly warped, but always able to brighten my day.

Elise is a strong woman, carrying lots of real life complications on her shoulders.

Elise is mother to some adorable children, who in turn adore her.

Elise is beautiful- just look at the photos and you'll see.

Elise is loving and giving. She is a wonderful part of our WISH family, always quick with a sweet or funny comment or an amusing bit of gently self-deprecating humor.

Elise is a very intelligent woman, and we're lucky to have her here.

I hope you don't feel like you're going this all alone. Although we can't be there with you in person, we will be there in spirit. I know this will be a rocky time for you and the kids, but you have the skills to not only survive this, but to flourish once you get beyond this part.

This is a chance to clean out the old junk in your life. In your new start, you can surround yourself with people who DESERVE and APPRECIATE all you have to give.

 

[PAdisMOM]

I just wanted to let you know that I'll be thinking about you and praying for you. It sounds like you're going through a tough time.

Remember that you cannot contol what he does, only your reaction to it. When all is said and done, you are going to be proud if you took care of yourself throughout this. Living well is the best revenge. (Not that your out for revenge. I don't mean to imply that! )

 

[elisebutt]

Aww guy's!!! I'm blushing!.

I managed to force down some celery, cheese and ham. keeping up the vitamins and loads of water. I hate eating when i'm not hungry, but i don't want fade away to an anorexic stick insect now, do I??

Anyway kids are holding up pretty well, Mums having them for the weekend before i go to Oz so I can have a break - booked in for a haircut, highlights, facial, manicure and eyebrow tidy!!!Just a few little things to perk me up - lol. And my tickets came today, so that lifted my mood somewhat, that and the £1100 spending money I won along with the holiday!

All booked in to see a solicitor re the divorce and custody stuff as soon as I get back so everything is moving along.

Thanks for all the ego boosting - I need it!!!

 

[CDoobee]

I don't have any wonderful advise for you, Elise. I think you got PLENTY of that already from all these great WISH friends!

I just want to add my support. You're a lovely woman with lovely kids. Take care of yourself!! {{{HUGS}}}

Debbie

 

[lmhall2000]

Staying alert mentally and physically- you've got alot to contend with but focus on what you have control over- you can't control his actions but you can control the way you treat your body- get exercise to help blow off the stress, talk to your children, come up with some "new" family traditions- they need to know now more than ever that they still have their family.
And here's the mom in me coming out- "Stop smoking! Stop the caffeine! Start treating yourself like the QUEEN you are!!!" Stress wreaks enough havoc on our systems- you don't need to push it along by not treating your body right. And when things get beyond your control- turn to your faith- for me it's my faith in God and the assurance that I know He is in control and He can have all the crap that's dished my way- He's much better at handling it than I am!
You can make it through this- if I were there I'd be stocking you up on fruits and veggies and preparing all your meals for you!! And I'd be secretly replacing your ciggies with those bubble gum kind- and slowly switching you to decaf- boy am I cruel or what??? But don't let the events around you dictate how you're going to treat yourself- you are a very special lady- and a loving mother- focus on those two things and you'll come out of this smelling like roses!!

Tara

 

[Jiminy102]

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

You need toe at so you can stay strong for yourself and the kids!!!! Take a long walk do something nice for yourself!!!! You deserve it!!!! We are here if you need us!!!! Feel free to PM anytime!!!!!!

 

[Mskanga]

Elise, I don't know what to say that hasn't been said yet, but I know what you mean , when I'm so stressed out I don't eat either.
Seems to me your soon to be X wants his cake and eat it too. Sad that he's taking it out on the children , but I will repeat what other have said before, you need to take care of yourself first so you can take care of your children. I can only hope that you have support from family close to you.
{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}

Olga

 

[nativetxn]

YIKES, Elise I wish there were some words that I could use to make you feel better about this situation. Unfortunately, we both know those words don't exist

I can't even offer advice about this because I've never been in a spot like this before.

I think I'm just sort of useless, here. I can offer you {{{HUGS}}} and a shoulder if you need it.

I hope you can get this worked out and that your kids don't catch much of the fallout. Bless their hearts and bless yours too. Hang in there.

Katholyn

 

[Kelsie]

((hugs)) Elise!

You are a strong and wonderful woman. You will survive this and find the happiness you deserve. But, you need to be healthy to do it. Please take care of yourself. You have to eat.

 

[Amelia]

I know it's hard to go through something like this but you will come out the other side a stronger better person. Take control of of your life and move on. You've got a good start by having your makeover with hair nails facial and such. Please don't let your soon to be X run your life and dictate who you can and cannot see. Your a good person and that's something he can't take away from you.

Please try to eat healthy and take care of yourself. Making yourself sick will only make your problems worse. We're all here for you when ever you need us.

Sending hugs and prayers to you from me.

Hang in there honey.