Not Sure Why I'm Sharing This... *Yet Another UPDATE Post #93*

[horseshowmom]

I'm just now seeing this thread (didn't have to wait throught the wondering like the other posters ).

First off, I think you're husband did what could have reasonably been expected in his dealings with the mother under the circumstances. I don't think he should feel like he should have done more. In hindsight, it's easy to look back and think about the lost years, but at the time there wasn't a lot more that he could have done.

Secondly, I think both of you are taking a healthy, commendable attitude with the situation. I'm honest enough to admit that if I were your husband I would probably have to struggle with some anger over the mother having kept my child from me. Your husband might have really been able to have had a positive impact on the boy as he grew up. That's so sad.

Thirdly, I wish all of you the best as you work through a future together (by the way, did you ever find out who he talked to 10 years ago?).

Lastly, I'm with the other posters in sending prayers on your behalf for the health of your children as they work through their issues and for you and your husband as you deal with everything that's going on!

 

[minniecarousel]

Wow, CindysFriend, you have a lot on your plate. Hang in there.

 

[chell]

s and prayers to you and your family. Sounds like you have a very stressful week ahead of you.

 

[Fridye]

CindysFriend, I'm impressed by how well you and your husband have handled this situation. You may not feel it, but you are a strong person! Keep us posted.

 

[Va-bear]

to your DS21 and your DD. to Shawn and DH. And most of all to YOU - you are doing a GREAT job taking care of yuor family, hope you are taking care of you.

 

[Mickeyteacher]

Your family is in my prayers. I hope you all get the answer that you are hoping for.

S

 

[Pooh_Friend#1]

I hope your DS and DD made it through okay and are on their way to a speedy recovery. You and your DH are doing such a great things. Hugs to you.

 

[powellrj]

You have a lot going on in your life, I hope that your DS and DD are doing well. Good luck!

 

[Irin997]

Wow, just found this thread and can't wait to hear how it turns out!

 

[Minnesota!]

Wow - I'm hooked! Hope the results go the way you want them to!

 

[suzannen]

I'm also following along this wonderful story and can't wait to find out the results and have my fingers crossed it's good news! Good thoughts for the rest of the family now too.

 

[MELISAZACK]

Wow.. very interesting story and I can't wait to hear your outcome. I hope for the son and father it turns out the way you are hoping for!

 

[Luv2Scrap]

Wow! what a story! I hope that no matter what happens, it has a happy ending for everybody involved. I will be watching for updates---I'm hooked!

 

[MickeysMommy]

 

[Sandy321]

Cindy'sfriend and family!

I'm sure you are emotional spent - and maybe sending you a in a PM would reach you the next you pop in for some getaway time?

We recently had a hospital emergency long term situation with our DS21 - we were lucky he was released from the hospital 2 days before our first son's wedding!! THAT was enough stress for me!! (ds 21 after the wedding then went to out patient care and therapies!)

The one piece of advice that was given to us when we didnt know the prognosis for DS 21 was to set a goal, or a plan for Dh and I - so that we could strengthen us - and not "neglect" us and our relationship! DH looked at me, and said "Disney Marathon?" and I grinned - this is so that we each was forced to have a "health" goal - as well as a "fun goal"

May you also receive a miracle for your DS!!

 

[CindysFriend]

I am in shock. DH got the results of the test and it says "0% probability". He is not Shawn's father. I feel bad for my DH, but I feel just awful for Shawn.

The test results go into explicit detail, DNA-marker by DNA-marker, explaining how they came to their conclusion.

DH called an older friend of Shawn's just a few minutes ago because he did not want to call Shawn with the news without knowing that he had emotional support with him at the time. Unbeknownst to us, Shawn was at this friend's house, so after DH explained to the friend why he was calling, the friend put Shawn on the phone, and DH gave him the news. He said that Shawn sounded "deflated".

What a shame. His mother has some explaining to do. Freaking low-life.

To the person who asked if DH might have some anger about him not knowing or having access to his son all these years, DH was reserving all feelings like that until he knew for sure. Now we're angry with his mother for OTHER reasons than her having kept Shawn from DH all these years. HOW CAN A MOTHER DO THIS TO THEIR CHILD???

He just said to me "She told me in no uncertain terms, at the time, that there was NO CHANCE that it was my child. She obviously was telling the truth back then".

DH has emailed Shawn's mother, asking her to call. DH actually sent the email to her before he decided to call Shawn's older friend, because he just wanted to be sure that someone would be with him when he got the news. I imagine she will call here... Kind of curious how that conversation will go. I do know that DH will handle it with MUCH more tact and composure than I would.

I want to thank everyone who took the time to read this and give support and encouragement. DS21 is still in the hospital and Sandy321 you've really hit the nail on the head with what we're dealing with. DD18 did very well with her wisdom teeth removal.

We're still kind of in shock... if there's anything new to say, I'll be sure to post back. Thanks, everyone.

 

[OceanAnnie]

You and your DH, and Shawn have been on a roller coaster of emotions. I'm sorry.

 

[DisneyBlonde]

I'm so so sorry.

 

[Feralpeg]

First, let me say that I am sorry that the results did not turn out as you had all wished. That being said, biology isn't all that important. It really sounds like Shawn could use a father figure. It seems that your DH was excited about the idea of being that figure to Shawn. There is really nothing to stop that if they both still want it. So, your DH isn't Shawn's biological father. How about being his friend instead?

 

[OceanAnnie]

First, let me say that I am sorry that the results did not turn out as you had all wished. That being said, biology isn't all that important. It really sounds like Shawn could use a father figure. It seems that your DH was excited about the idea of being that figure to Shawn. There is really nothing to stop that if they both still want it. So, your DH isn't Shawn's biological father. How about being his friend instead?

It would be nice if something good could come from the experience.