No it's not that I don't like it I'm allergic!

[srferson]

The big picture for me is that people feel they cannot trust others because too many people lie too much. Honesty needs to start somewhere.

If you don't like apples and choose to say you're allergic, I don't think that's the end of the world. But it does add one more lie to the pile of lies that causes people to not believe each other. And when you're telling the truth about something, especially something important, it's really frustrating if people won't believe you because there are so many others who lie about it.

 

[phorsenuf]

If you say at a restaurant that you are allergic to something then the cooks have to be very careful when preparing the food for fear of cross contamination. It could slow things down in the kitchen because they will need to switch utensils out, sanitize a prep area or maybe take a cook off the line to concentrate on that dish only. So while some may say it doesn't hurt anyone by saying they are allergic when they are not, could be causing problems and slow-downs behind the scenes, that could then effect everyone in the restaurant.

Just playing devils advocate.

 

[GigglyFigment]

Above is what I meant by "if it causes a reaction at all, I can understand." I cannot understand choosing to be vegan and then blaming it on a food allergy. Just because something's easier doesn't make it right. And trust me--the food allergy life isn't "easy" by any means--try ordering something egg, dairy, soy, peanut and tree nut free--with no possibility of cross contamination. Then when there isn't anything for your 5 yr old to eat, explain to him that he will have to eat what mama brought for him. Explain this to him every.single.time you go ANYWHERE--restaurants, birthday parties, family reunions, Costco on sample day. It wouldn't be okay to "pretend" you have any other disease or illness, but because it's food allergies and "doesn't harm anyone" it's okay?

Actually, that's just my point. It is far easier to tell a waiter "I'm allergic to dairy and eggs" rather than "I'm vegan, does this have dairy and eggs in it?" Because Vegetarian and Vegan diets are choices, frequently chefs will sneak in things - "Oh, it's just chicken stock, they won't notice." Will chicken stock or eggs or cow milk harm them physically? Probably not. Will it harm them emotionally? Heck yes. People without allergies have just as much of a right to eat exactly what they wish as those with allergies.

People say "I'm allergic" because that gets more attention/respect than "I don't like/I choose not to eat" which is flipping ridiculous.

I'm sorry about your struggles with your son's allergy, I'm sure he will grow to understand as he gets older. I know it's difficult to explain to a young child "No, you cannot have this as it will make you very ill/could kill you" as they don't really understand their own mortality. If they haven't had or don't remember having a bad reaction then they have no idea what the fuss is all about.

I really do not understand why someone who dislikes something and claims it's an allergy has an actual impact. I think the issue is more that there are people who don't respect other people that have no problem "testing" them or sneaking in foods they say they don't like.

Especially considering the fact that a lot of dislikes are allergies in the making - not everyone knows the signs. Especially when it's minor reactions or those that happen hours later.

 

[mhsjax]

The big picture for me is that people feel they cannot trust others because too many people lie too much. Honesty needs to start somewhere.

If you don't like apples and choose to say you're allergic, I don't think that's the end of the world. But it does add one more lie to the pile of lies that causes people to not believe each other. And when you're telling the truth about something, especially something important, it's really frustrating if people won't believe you because there are so many others who lie about it.

Well lets turn that around on those crazy people who try and sneak things in. If you come to my house and you tell me that you are allergic to mushrooms or apples or whatever, then I will believe you. I trust you to tell me what you can and can't eat. The only way I would know if you were lying is if I were one of those nut cases that tried to sneak in a food to see if you really were allergic. So lets stop blaming those who are just trying to avoid certain foods and put the blame on the idiots out there trying to prove them wrong. If I went to anyones house and this happened to me and they tried to probe me wrong, there would be a major scene made by me, who in the heck to they think they are trying to prove a point, what if I really was allergic? I would no longer associate with these people and would love to tell everyone I knew what idiots they are, but that is the way I roll. I don't put up with foolishness.

ETA, It is a huge character flaw in the person serving the food. If that is the way they are, then they were never going to believe you anyway, it has nothing to do with others "lying" about allergies. YOu can't fix stupid.

 

[Conservative Hippie]

The one that really bugs me is parents faking gluten allergies for their kids. I know of two mothers who do/have done this. With both of them, I went out of my way to provide gluten-free food at my house, and brought gluten-free cookies to parties just because I knew there were going to be "gluten-free" kids there and I wanted them to have choices. One kid's gluten allergy magically disappears at Disney. The other kids....we were all going out for pizza with another family and I asked the mother if she wanted to tell the other family we needed to go somewhere else. She said no, they would be fine, and I assumed she knew that pizza place had gluten-free pizza or something. Nope. Her kids ate the same gluten-filled pizza as my kids. I got so annoyed at these two women because I had concern for the kids, bought special food, went out of my way to learn gluten-free cookie recipes, but apparently they were only gluten-free when it was convenient for mom.

 

[disfan07]

The big picture for me is that people feel they cannot trust others because too many people lie too much. Honesty needs to start somewhere.

If you don't like apples and choose to say you're allergic, I don't think that's the end of the world. But it does add one more lie to the pile of lies that causes people to not believe each other. And when you're telling the truth about something, especially something important, it's really frustrating if people won't believe you because there are so many others who lie about it.

Exactly. It does make it more difficult for people who do have true allergies and/or intolerances.

As a whole, our society is so uneducated about food allergies. They don't understand the seriousness of it or how isolating it can feel for someone who has a food allergy. A lot of people just don't get it.

I worked at a camp and aftercare program. We had a peanut free table. In my camp group at one time I had 3 peanut and tree nut allergic kids. When the parents found out that I was also allergic to peanuts they were thrilled to have someone who really knew about allergies and how severe they were caring for their child. They had all dealt with situations where people didn't understand allergies or believe their child had allergies. All of them had previous history of anaphylactic reactions.

And that's why I get so frustrated when it is suggested on these boards for people who have dietary preferences to mark it as an allergy so they can talk to the chef. The chefs are already so overwhelmed at Disney and it is a service they are providing for dietary restrictions and allergies......not preferences. Allergies, intolerances, low sodium, celiac, etc....go ahead...that's a medical reason. But vegan, vegetarian, personal food choices....please....don't use those services. It's not fair to those who can't eat without those services. It's why I go to Disney....it's the only place I can eat out.

And believe me....it's not because I think we deserve this "special" treatment more than others. I would give anything to just be able to order whatever I want off the menu. I would love to not have to wait an additional 20-30 minutes to get my food because of my allergies. It's about people abusing a system in place to make it possible for those of use who need it to enjoy our vacation. I equate it to be similar to abusing GACs. How come people get so up in arms about people abusing the GACs but are fine with people abusing special diets services?

 

[JRawkSteady]

The chefs are already so overwhelmed at Disney and it is a service they are providing for dietary restrictions and allergies......not preferences. Allergies, intolerances, low sodium, celiac, etc....go ahead...that's a medical reason. But vegan, vegetarian, personal food choices....please....don't use those services. It's not fair to those who can't eat without those services. It's why I go to Disney....it's the only place I can eat out.

Okay, but what if it's a diet based on religious belief? I mean where does your opinion end and another's begin? I PERSONALLY think vegan/vegetarianism is ridiculous, but people believe that this is the right thing for them and who are we to say they can't have special meals made for them?

 

[Janepod]

Kitchens need to put a lot of extra work in to creating an allergen-free meal. They have to clean/swap out utensils and pots, shut down grills so they can be cleaned, and use different plates. These things take time and time is money in a restaurant. So don't waste the staff's time with these extra steps just because, say, you don't want your pee to smell like asparagus.

And this reminds me of my "allergic to tomatoes" future stepsister, who nonetheless douses every burger in ketchup:

http://www.washingtoncitypaper.com/articles/36444/breaking-out-in-chives

"Black recalls one woman who came into his Black’s Bar & Kitchen in Bethesda and ordered a crab cake sandwich, which came with mustard on the bun. When the waiter brought the dish out, the diner said she was allergic to mustard and asked if she could just have a plain bun.

Well, explains Black, the crab cake patty also had a grainy mustard in the mix. So the server came out with a menu and offered to take a new order, at which point the woman said, “Oh, I’m not really allergic.”

“All she had to say was ‘I don’t want mustard,’” says Black, who notes that the condiment was mentioned in the menu."

 

[Wendy31]

I can't *STAND* mayonnaise. Absolutely loathe even the smell of it. I'm the same way w/ Ranch and Blue Cheese dressing. Just thinking about the smell of Ranch dressing makes me feel sick.

I've never told anyone that I'm allergic to any of these things. I simply ask for my sandwich or salad w/o mayo or ranch dressing. And, many times, I have to send my plate back because it's been served to me w/ mayo or ranch dressing.

And, many times, when I'm at an event or restaurant w/ people who find out I'm not eating mayo will say things like, "You don't like mayonnaise? Who doesn't like mayonnaise?"

Once, at a church function, there was a lady who's known me almost my entire life & knew about me & my "no mayo thing." She made a broccoli casserole, & I ate some. After I was finished eating it, she smiled at me & said, "Did you like my broccoli casserole?" And, when I replied yes, she laughed gleefully & said, "It has mayonnaise in it! I fooled you! See! You CAN eat mayonnaise!"

And, now, I ask before I eat anything casserole-y (& feel like a dork) - "Does this have mayo in it?"

And, as an aside, what's up w/ all these sandwiches pre-made w/ mayo?!

Anyway, sometimes, I think about saying that I'm allergic to mayonnaise. It would make things easier & people might respect a "mayo allergy" more than they do a "no mayo please" - allergies are okay, but, if you don't like something, you're just being picky.

MSG gives me awful, raging migraines, so I DO say I have an MSG allergy - I've never been officially tested, & I'm not sure if you can be tested for MSG. However, there is a MSG/migraine link. And, I'm sorry, but I just don't want to spend the next 24 hours in pain in a dark room just because I ate something w/ MSG in it.

I also once showed a reaction to a sulfa drug - I broke out in a rash all over my body & itched like crazy... like I was itching from the inside of my body. It was awful! So, even though I may just have a sensitivity, I now say I'm allergic to sulfa drugs.

Anyway, I really feel for all of you who have significant allergies!

 

[Poohforyou]

Exactly. It does make it more difficult for people who do have true allergies and/or intolerances.

As a whole, our society is so uneducated about food allergies. They don't understand the seriousness of it or how isolating it can feel for someone who has a food allergy. A lot of people just don't get it.

I worked at a camp and aftercare program. We had a peanut free table. In my camp group at one time I had 3 peanut and tree nut allergic kids. When the parents found out that I was also allergic to peanuts they were thrilled to have someone who really knew about allergies and how severe they were caring for their child. They had all dealt with situations where people didn't understand allergies or believe their child had allergies. All of them had previous history of anaphylactic reactions.

And that's why I get so frustrated when it is suggested on these boards for people who have dietary preferences to mark it as an allergy so they can talk to the chef. The chefs are already so overwhelmed at Disney and it is a service they are providing for dietary restrictions and allergies......not preferences. Allergies, intolerances, low sodium, celiac, etc....go ahead...that's a medical reason. But vegan, vegetarian, personal food choices....please....don't use those services. It's not fair to those who can't eat without those services. It's why I go to Disney....it's the only place I can eat out.
And believe me....it's not because I think we deserve this "special" treatment more than others. I would give anything to just be able to order whatever I want off the menu. I would love to not have to wait an additional 20-30 minutes to get my food because of my allergies. It's about people abusing a system in place to make it possible for those of use who need it to enjoy our vacation. I equate it to be similar to abusing GACs. How come people get so up in arms about people abusing the GACs but are fine with people abusing special diets services?

Again, how? If I didn't admit I wasn't really allergic to mushrooms and simply said I had a mushroom allergy you'd believe me. As long as someone isn't going around claiming to be allergic and then admitting it isn't true it isn't affecting you at all no matter how much you believe the contrary to be true.

I also don't understand what is so special about Disney that it's the only place you can eat out. If no other food establishment could provide allergy free meals no one with a food allergy would eat anywhere but home and Disney. That of course is not what is happening in the real world. Disney isn't this magic bubble with chef that never make mistakes. I'm certain contamination has happened there just like everywhere else.

Now, for all my arguing, I have only ever used the allergy card about 3 times and that was catered events with a very limited menu. For some reason the host at those events chose to have mushrooms in every menu option. At a restaurant I just will select something without mushrooms even if it isn't my 1st choice. As long as mushrooms aren't mentioned as part of the dish I don't say anything.

 

[srferson]

And that's why I get so frustrated when it is suggested on these boards for people who have dietary preferences to mark it as an allergy so they can talk to the chef. The chefs are already so overwhelmed at Disney and it is a service they are providing for dietary restrictions and allergies......not preferences. Allergies, intolerances, low sodium, celiac, etc....go ahead...that's a medical reason. But vegan, vegetarian, personal food choices....please....don't use those services. It's not fair to those who can't eat without those services. It's why I go to Disney....it's the only place I can eat out.

I'm going to agree with this with one small change. You say don't use those services. I say don't LIE to use those services.

If the chef knows I'm vegan and he has the time to come out and talk to me (which I've never asked for, but has happened), then I am using those services. But if there are four people in the dining room who have true allergies and he has time for them and not me, absolutely fine. More than fine. I'm not going to put someone else's health at risk for dietary restrictions I have chosen. (And as I said before, there are very strong reasons why I choose this and it is more than just pickiness, no matter what someone else may think.)

 

[srferson]

Well lets turn that around on those crazy people who try and sneak things in. If you come to my house and you tell me that you are allergic to mushrooms or apples or whatever, then I will believe you. I trust you to tell me what you can and can't eat. The only way I would know if you were lying is if I were one of those nut cases that tried to sneak in a food to see if you really were allergic. So lets stop blaming those who are just trying to avoid certain foods and put the blame on the idiots out there trying to prove them wrong. If I went to anyones house and this happened to me and they tried to probe me wrong, there would be a major scene made by me, who in the heck to they think they are trying to prove a point, what if I really was allergic? I would no longer associate with these people and would love to tell everyone I knew what idiots they are, but that is the way I roll. I don't put up with foolishness.

ETA, It is a huge character flaw in the person serving the food. If that is the way they are, then they were never going to believe you anyway, it has nothing to do with others "lying" about allergies. YOu can't fix stupid.

Actually, your ETA was going to be my point.

We've actually split off onto two different issues.

There is one issue with the people who don't believe in the allergies. Those who think they don't exist or can be "cured" by slipping something into the food. Pretty much doesn't matter whether you're telling the truth or not, they still won't believe you. That's who you are talking about. And yeah, I have no idea what to say about those people. I don't understand them either.

The other issue is people (particularly chefs, waiters, or kitchen staff) who believe in allergies, but start to become less diligent with their food prep because it's the tenth time that day that there's been an "allergy" and he's running behind schedule. And it doesn't cause a problem and doesn't cause a problem and doesn't cause a problem, until it does cause a problem. A problem for even one person is reason enough for me to feel that people should be honest about it.

 

[ashley0139]

Yes there is. There aren't strong enough words for me to describe my dislike of mushrooms. I'd eat dirt and bugs before eating them. I'd literally starve to death before eating them. No one gets that.

Even others who say they don't like them will eat them in things like sauce and salads. I've been told to just scrape them off or push them aside. I CAN'T DO THAT AND EAT THE REMAINING FOOD BECAUSE THE MUSHROOM TASTE IS NOW IN EVERYTHING.

Saying I'm allergic immediately gets people off my back and gets me food without a mushroom in sight.

I'll state it again, my doing this doesn't impact anyone else. Once I get food without mushrooms I don't confess that I'm not really allergic so no one is the wiser. I've been saying it for about 30 years so even my family now thinks it's true.

Sorry, I just disagree. My mother is the exact same way as you about pickles. She will gag if she even smells them. If one comes on the plate, she will send the whole plate back. She has never said she was allergic to pickles, she just asks to not have them or sends the plate back if they have them. Why is that difficult?

I also don't understand why you would WANT to say you have an allergy anyway. I hate having to be one of those people (gluten free for over 20 years). I would never ever do it voluntarily. But that's beside the point.

 

[srferson]

Thank you all for sharing your thoughts in a civil manner. It's been an interesting thread.

I, personally, should be working, so I'm ducking out.

My very bottom line is the general statement that we should not lie for our own convenience. That even if you don't think it's affecting anyone else, it probably is.

I do understand and hear some of you that don't believe that. But I most certainly do. Nothing is as simple as it seems.

 

[Janepod]

...

My very bottom line is the general statement that we should not lie for our own convenience. That even if you don't think it's affecting anyone else, it probably is.
...

Well put.

I would also like to add that I don't want to lie in front of my son (he's 7) about anything. Even a seemingly innocuous lie like "I'm allergic to celery" when I really just don't like it. Because then he'll come away with the message that it's okay to lie if you really want something your way.

 

[srferson]

(Not even reading new posts so as to not get sucked in again.)

But I did want to pop back in to say that I am not the earlier poster who said that anyone who lies about allergies is a jerk. I may disagree with some people, but I definitely don't agree with that statement.

 

[kkandaj]

Again, how? If I didn't admit I wasn't really allergic to mushrooms and simply said I had a mushroom allergy you'd believe me. As long as someone isn't going around claiming to be allergic and then admitting it isn't true it isn't affecting you at all no matter how much you believe the contrary to be true.

I also don't understand what is so special about Disney that it's the only place you can eat out. If no other food establishment could provide allergy free meals no one with a food allergy would eat anywhere but home and Disney. That of course is not what is happening in the real world. Disney isn't this magic bubble with chef that never make mistakes. I'm certain contamination has happened there just like everywhere else.

Now, for all my arguing, I have only ever used the allergy card about 3 times and that was catered events with a very limited menu. For some reason the host at those events chose to have mushrooms in every menu option. At a restaurant I just will select something without mushrooms even if it isn't my 1st choice. As long as mushrooms aren't mentioned as part of the dish I don't say anything.

What's so special about Disney? The have chef's that are trained, come straight to your table, go straight back to the kitchen and make your food in a dedicated area of the kitchen to avoid cross contamination and bring the food personally back to your table. And DS doesn't eat out, other than Disney--that IS the real world! He eats at WDW and Babycakes, the bakery at Downtown Disney because they are also a dedicated allergy friendly facility. (I'm sure mistakes have been made--they are just hyper aware and have dedicated workplaces for this reason.) DS eats food we bring EVERYWHERE. He does NOT eat restaurant food because the 2 times I have ordered for him...the supposed to be plain baked chicken breast came out with cheese on it...and the other time the plain steamed broccoli came out IN my fettucine alfredo. YEP--THAT is real life.

Real life for DS is him bringing a lunch box to every.single.place we eat.

 

[JRawkSteady]

He does NOT eat restaurant food because the 2 times I have ordered for him...the supposed to be plain baked chicken breast came out with cheese on it...and the other time the plain steamed broccoli came out IN my fettucine alfredo. YEP--THAT is real life.

And this could NEVER happen at Disney? Stop it. People get your order wrong sometimes...it's not the end of the world. Send it back and get one without cheese. Then tip the waitress less for screwing up. It's as simple as that. IMHO, this post is SO over-the-top for a couple of food screw ups.

P.S. I don't know how things are in Missouri, but in NYC there are PLENTY of restaurants that will cater to your every needs.

 

[GAGirlInVA]

OP, I have the same issue with blue cheese and PCN.

DH is PCN and sulfa allergic.

Our oldest daughter is allergic to rocephin and peanuts.

But my boys allllllllll have food allergies. None can handle egg or nuts. Which is kind of humorous since we adopted our oldest son. We joke that his birthmom chose the right family for his dietary needs.

I only have one child with no (known) allergies.

Carrots, blueberries, bananas, milk, soy, corn, almonds, peanuts, eggs, blue cheese, and raw bell peppers.

Sigh.

 

[phorsenuf]

And this could NEVER happen at Disney? Stop it. People get your order wrong sometimes...it's not the end of the world. Send it back and get one without cheese. Then tip the waitress less for screwing up. It's as simple as that. IMHO, this post is SO over-the-top for a couple of food screw ups.

P.S. I don't know how things are in Missouri, but in NYC there are PLENTY of restaurants that will cater to your every needs.

I always chuckle how the only place they can eat out is at Disney. I just don't buy it and that's when I tend to think some people are over exaggerating their allergies.