No baby . . .

[GEM]

I don't want to make any of you guys too sad, but I really need someplace to talk about this. I am just about eight weeks pregnant today. On Friday night, I started spotting and it is still going on. I don't have any pain or anything, just spottng. I saw my doctor today and she sent me over to the hospital for an ultrasound. They did a regular ultrasound and a trans******l ultrasound. On both, they could see the gestational sac - but nothing inside. My doctor said it might just be too early, but I am just over 8 weeks and I know that she should have been able to see something by now. So, I guess it looks like it reallly is probably over. I did have some blood taken and I have to go back and have more taken on Thursday so they can compare the levels to see if they go up or down. I don't really have any hope, though. This was our first and we were so excited just a few days ago. It's funny how fast that excitement has turned to sadness, confusion, guilt, and humiliation. I'm not even sure what the next step is after Thursday. I didn't get a chance to talk to my doctor about it. My husband and I were suppossed to leave on Sunday for a vacation, which we really need. I don't know if we should still plan on being able to go or if we should just go ahead and cancel. I really want to go because I can't stand the thought of just hanging around the house, but I don't know what to expect. Any advice?? Also, I guess we have to start spreading the news, which I dread. I'm just not ready to deal with anybody else's grief and dissappointment yet, when I haven't had time to really deal with my own. I feel totally lost . . .

 

[skuttle]

{{{HUGS}}} I'm so very sorry.

 

[binny]

(((hugs))) to you.

Listen to your doctor ok? I know youre afraid to hope at this poiint but if they said it was too early maybe it is.

I lost my first baby. We had just barely found out and told a few people. I didnt want to deal with it either. I felt like a failure and that I couldnt do anything right I was SURE I had caused the miscarriage.

I know now that I didnt do anything to cause it, sometimes these things happen.

If I were you I would go on your vacation anyway, I know it wont seem as joyous but you say you really need it, well then do it! It will help you to have some time away to sort things out.

Whatever you do though, take care of yourself Other peoples feelings arent what you should be worrying about at this point.

God Bless!

 

[wdw4us]

poor you. I'm so sorry for your loss. I hope you can go on your vacation. You need some time to relax. Maybe you could leave a few days later.

Take care of yourself, sending pixie dust and prayers to you.

denise

 

[GEM]

On a lighter note, that's the first time I ever used a word in post that didn't make it past the censor.

 

[helenabear]

I'm very sorry to hear this {{{hugs}}}

 

[mamajoan]

So sorry to hear this news. May God Bless you and keep you close.
Joan

 

[Saffron]

{{{{{Hugs}}}}}

 

[SuiteDisney]

I'm so sorry. (((hugs)))

 

[glo]

{{hugs}} I am so sorry to hear this...sent you a pm

 

[preshi]

I just went through the same thing. Please please feel free to e-mail me if there is anything I can do. I was also 8 weeks along and there wasn't any baby. I had other complications to go along with it too. If you need a shoulder I am here!

{{{hugs}}}

 

[Serena]

I'm sorry

 

[tar heel]

I, too, have been where you are. I am so sorry to hear your news.

 

[Kermit]

{{{Hugs}}} I am so sorry.

If you have a sac and no baby, it's probably a blighted ovum. (I had one earlier this year.) That means that when the sperm and egg got together, there was some sort of problem right from the start, and the baby either didn't develop or was absorbed by your body soon thereafter.

The reason they're waiting until Thursday is just to do another ultrasound and see if the baby shows up. If not, you'll have two options. One is to have a d&c to remove the products of conception. How they do it will depend on your doctor. Mine does them in the maternity ward at the hospital under full anesthesia, but I think some doctors use a twilight sleep. The other choice is to just wait and let nature run its course. You will eventually miscarry. Since you're bleeding, it may not be too long of a wait. They can probably give you a better idea when the compare the quantity of HGC in your 2 blood tests. If it's not going down, you could be in a for a wait. Complications from either choice are extremely rare. With the d&c, infection or complications from the anesthesia are probably the biggest risk, and your doctor will give you antiobiotics to prevent infection. With the miscarriage, you could retain part of the materials, which would cause you to either bleed heavily or get an infection. The rememedy would be a d&c.

In all actuality, you should plan on canceling your vacation. You're either going to be recovering from minor surgery or waiting to miscarry. You don't want to do either of those away from home and away from your doctor.

I did a lot of research (obviously) when my doctor diagnosed my blighted ovum. I was 12 weeks at the time. I waited 3 weeks to miscarry and then consented for the surgery. I actually had a d&e, which is what they do for people who are further along, but the recovery is the same. I didn't have any problems. I was cramping when I came out the OR, but by the time the nausea from the anesthesia subsided, I was fine. My doctor gave me pain pills, but I ended up taking only one Advil, and that was because my throat got scratched by the breathing tube.

You and your DH will be in my prayers. I know this is a hard time. Please PM me if you need to talk or have any questions that I might be able to answer. {{{Hugs}}}

 

[Dizzy-Disney4]

{{{HUGS}}} I'm so sorry.

 

[BibbidiBobbidiBOO]

I had the same thing happen to me between my two children. Except I did not know the sac was empty until they did an ultrasound at 12 weeks because I was bleeding. So sorry, hugs and prayers for you both.

 

[Dan Murphy]

GEM, this is a great place to come to, as you say, talk about it. And to reach out for the comfort it can provide. Always nice to have friends and family close by.

As binny pointed out, maybe it just is too early to tell. If not, my best wishes and prayers for you and your hubby. Always such an emotional roller coaster with events like this, up, then down.

Know well we are with you, GEM. {{Hugs}}.

 

[Sonya]

I'm sorry, I'll be thinking about you.

 

[ugadog99]

I am so sorry. I am hoping for the best for you.
{{{{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}}}}

 

[Mickey's sunshine]

{{hugs}} to you sweetie. I dont know what to say to comfort you a little but I will keep you in my thoughts.