Let's support each other. This journey will be difficult but we can do it and we are worth it.
That is the truth and you need to BELIEVE it!
I have been following this thread for a while now - and I hope you don't mind me chiming in. While I am not currently in the same boat as you, I have had my share of weight related issues. I lost nearly 50 lbs at WW, maintained for several years, slowly gained 15 pounds back, and recently lost that again. I am now at goal (again!) and I can fully appreciate the struggles you are facing.
Please know, that you are not alone in being embarrassed to weigh in! But also know- that the people at WW are not judging you. Everyone is there for the same reason. I have a dear friend who is morbidly obese. I want SO badly for her to lose weight - but unfortunately you can't make someone "want to". You have to decide for yourself what you want to do with your life.
I decided that I needed to be selfish. I needed to put myself first - before my job, before my husband, and yes, even before my kids. It was a really hard choice to make. But you know what I discovered? They survived just fine. And when I became happier within myself, everyone around me was happier as well. I had to make exercise a daily priority and I had to make healthy food choices all the time (even if they swore they hated brown rice!)
I also had to FORGIVE myself. No one can be *perfect* all the time. It's impossible to expect 100% effort for weeks on end. But, if I could look back at my week and see a good balance of activity and food choices, I knew that good things would happen.
For me, the 2 key things that contributed to my success were accountability & rewards. If you have someone that you can trust to be non-judgemental who will weigh you and check your food journal (write it all down - the good, the bad, the ugly!) on a regular basis it really helps. Be brutally honest with yourself - it's eye opening! If you can find an exercise buddy to walk with, you'll find it harder to find excuses not to do it. (If I show up at 6am and you're not there, I'm gonna be really ticked off!!) And be sure to reward yourself. I never used a weight loss number (ex. 5 lbs) as a target - but I'd set myself tiny little mini goals. Like if I exercised 30 minutes 4 times a week for 2 weeks, I'd buy myself a new pair of work-out pants - if not, I'd have to wear the same cruddy ones that I hated.
But please, whatever you decide to do, love yourself. Be kind to yourself. You ARE worth it. We all are.
