Mother spanking child at the mall.

[chrisw127]

I was shopping this morning when I saw a mother spanking her child at the mall. The kid was about two or three and just screaming her head off, enough so that a security guard came up to her and asked is she needed help. What worried me was that if she was behaving that way in public, how must she act in private?

Personally, we don't spank. I think that just because you can be a bully to someone who is smaller than you doesn't mean you should.

 

[Angelhalo]

I know there will be people who will come in and totally flame you, call you a hippie or whatever but I totally agree. We grew up in a no spanking household and my brother and I are both smart, polite, considerate, well behaved adults and we were pretty good kids too. Everything with my father was about respect. he taught it to us early and our entire childhood learning and growing cycle could be related back to it. I even remember him talking to me about respect when I was like 3 or 4 years old. It took me a bit to fully understand but I thank him all the time now for taking the time to teach me respect rather than just slapping me around.

 

[Goofyluver]

I'm a no spankin' momma. Just because I don't spank, doesn't mean I don't believe in discipline. I'm a strict mommy...but you don't have to HIT to get your message across. I think it's taking the easy way out.

I loooove watching someone smack their child for hitting their brother or sister. "We don't hit!" And then they smack their kid.

 

[NY Disney fan]

A couple years ago I was at Target and a very frustrated "mother" called her 2 year old a very bad word that only adults, or sailors in a barfight call each other. I was so horrified I stopped and stared her down. She threatened to beat me up for getting involved in her business.

 

[binny]

I know there will be people who will come in and totally flame you, call you a hippie or whatever but I totally agree. We grew up in a no spanking household and my brother and I are both smart, polite, considerate, well behaved adults and we were pretty good kids too. Everything with my father was about respect. he taught it to us early and our entire childhood learning and growing cycle could be related back to it. I even remember him talking to me about respect when I was like 3 or 4 years old. It took me a bit to fully understand but I thank him all the time now for taking the time to teach me respect rather than just slapping me around.

us too but we were a spanking household. Not often mind you, but when we deserved it. I think I remember 4 or 5 times my whole life and that is how I do it. Its has to be pretty bad to get spanked in my house.
and then ONLY with a hand, I have a lot of friends who have a spankin spoon and I dont abide by that at all.

It isnt my first line of discipline but I reserve the right to do it if I deem it neccesary.

 

[Master Mason]

I was shopping this morning when I saw a mother spanking her child at the mall. The kid was about two or three and just screaming her head off, enough so that a security guard came up to her and asked is she needed help. What worried me was that if she was behaving that way in public, how must she act in private?

Personally, we don't spank. I think that just because you can be a bully to someone who is smaller than you doesn't mean you should.

You can count on one hand the number of times I spanked both of my kids, however, I also believe at times it is the quickest and surest way to make a lasting impression as well.

 

[melly]

Personally, we don't spank. .

So in short, everyone should discipline their children like you do yours?

 

[CathrynRose]

I hate these threads - cuz it never fails to get ugly.

Abuse is one thing. Losing control and smacking the heck out of a kid is another thing. But IMO a smack on the bottom sometimes ends the situation completely and (as Mason said) makes a lasting impression when used selectively.

Verbal abuse bugs me more. When you see a mother berating a little kid, and the kid in tears, REALLY bugs me way more than a *pop* on the bottom. In fact Ive seen kids at the mall and thought to myself - I'd have smacked 'em by now.

But - IMO - unless it's abuse I dont judge parents on their parenting, and I expect the same in return.

 

[Anewman]

There are good parents that spank, and there are good parents that do not spank.
There are BAD parents that spank, and there are BAD parents that do not spank.


Proof is in the pudding.

 

[NY Disney fan]

I have a 2 year-old and I, as of recently, have smacked her on the butt or tapped her on the leg. When she openly defies me, I give her a verbal warning but sometimes she ends up physically hurting others (other kids or adults nearby) when she misbehaves and that is when I "spank" her. I never give her more than one pat on the butt or hand.

 

[mirmartinez]

You do not hit a two or three year old.
They weight what 30 pounds, that is sick.(I do not consider a light tap on the butt hitting)
In my book, if hitting your two or three year old is how you get things done, you are one mean bitty.


As for people who interfer, careful the parent may very well rage on their child even more when you leave.

 

[Rora]

There are good parents that spank, and there are good parents that do not spank.
There are BAD parents that spank, and there are BAD parents that do not spank.


Proof is in the pudding.

ITA. Very well put.

Melly: I don't think the OP is telling other people how to raise their children, just sharing a story and looking for opinions and thoughts.

Let's keep this thread FRIENDLY, everyone.

 

[SwedishMeatball]

There are good parents that spank, and there are good parents that do not spank.
There are BAD parents that spank, and there are BAD parents that do not spank.

Exactly.

 

[pdchris]

I hate these threads - cuz it never fails to get ugly.

Abuse is one thing. Losing control and smacking the heck out of a kid is another thing. But IMO a smack on the bottom sometimes ends the situation completely and (as Mason said) makes a lasting impression when used selectively.

Verbal abuse bugs me more. When you see a mother berating a little kid, and the kid in tears, REALLY bugs me way more than a *pop* on the bottom. In fact Ive seen kids at the mall and thought to myself - I'd have smacked 'em by now.

But - IMO - unless it's abuse I dont judge parents on their parenting, and I expect the same in return.

ITA Cathryn.
Mental abuse is going to affect that child way into their adult life. (not to say that physical abuse, when extreme, doesn't either)
I always made it a point to never use swear words at my children or call them names. I may call what they did dumb but never called them dumb for doing it.

 

[bookgirl]

If it was inappropriate you should have called the police, if it was just a mother spanking a misbehaving child then that is thier choice on child rearing. If it's not your's then go about your day.

Them spanking doesn't make them a bad parent, anymore then you not spanking doesn't make you a good parent, no one knows what kind of parent they are until your kids grow up.

If you raise a productive, human that makes the world a better place then whatever you did to get them there makes your style of upbringing the right one. And it's pretty obvious that both styles have provided results, negative and positeve.

 

[chrisw127]

So in short, everyone should discipline their children like you do yours?

Did I say that? I said "personally" and then I said why I don't do it. That doesn't sound like I'm telling anyone else how they should parent to me.

 

[Laura]

I was shopping this morning when I saw a mother spanking her child at the mall. The kid was about two or three and just screaming her head off, enough so that a security guard came up to her and asked is she needed help. What worried me was that if she was behaving that way in public, how must she act in private?

Personally, we don't spank. I think that just because you can be a bully to someone who is smaller than you doesn't mean you should.

Well, I was spanked but it was never like that. It was never done in anger, but more "ceremonious" I guess you could say. My siblings and I never screamed our heads off during it. I don't see spanking as bullying necessarily, but it certainly could be in certain situations.

 

[dsnylvr]

Every child needs a pat on the back occassionally, as long as its low enough and hard enough to make a difference.

 

[Goofyluver]

Every child needs a pat on the back occassionally, as long as its low enough and hard enough to make a difference.

Every child needs to be disciplined. That doesn't necessarily mean that they need to be spanked to be disciplined.

 

[GothTink]

I grew up being spanked. It was awful. We don't spank.