Mother spanking child at the mall.

[LisaNJ25]

If it was inappropriate you should have called the police, if it was just a mother spanking a misbehaving child then that is thier choice on child rearing. If it's not your's then go about your day.

Them spanking doesn't make them a bad parent, anymore then you not spanking doesn't make you a good parent, no one knows what kind of parent they are until your kids grow up.

If you raise a productive, human that makes the world a better place then whatever you did to get them there makes your style of upbringing the right one. And it's pretty obvious that both styles have provided results, negative and positeve.

 

[pweyl36]

I was spanked and my children were spanked, albeit not nearly as often as I was. We are all fine, thank you.

Same here, I was spanked but not often. MY MOM did the spanking. I have spanked my kids but not often. Most of the time my kids get the look and then they know I mean business.

 

[MinnieMe87]

Same here, I was spanked but not often. MY MOM did the spanking. I have spanked my kids but not often. Most of the time my kids get the look and then they know I mean business.

I know that look,my mom gives it well!!

 

[eeyore kelly]

I managed a children's store. A woman with a child picked up one of my belts that was on a selling rack and proceeded to BEAT a two year old with it.

I told that woman that you can't do that here.

She told me with as much foul language as possible that it was her child and she could do what she wanted.

I told her you are beating that child with merchandise that is up for sell. I can't not allow you to use my stock that way.

She threw the belt on the floor and stormed out. I felt so bad for that baby!

Did I call the police? No! The company would have frowned on it. We were not even allowed to call over shoplifters. I needed my job.

There is spanking and there is abuse, and some people think they are one and the same.

I know I have thought about that child often. The incident took place in 2004.

 

[Castlebound]

I never had children, but I was a child. My parents believed in spanking, but I never remember (1) being struck by them in public - or - (2) being emotionally scarred by being spanked. Then as I got older, the spankings turned to lectures. I remember when I was nine saying to my mom (who was lecturing me at the time) "Mom, can't you just spank me and get this over with?"

I have worked with a lot of kids over the years and discovered that every child's personality is different, and they react to different forms of punishment. Unless I see someone very inappropriately disciplining their child in public, I stay out of it. To me, a spanking done in anger is always inappropriate. The punishment should always fit the crime.

My mom and I now laugh about me telling her the same thing when I was about twelve. I HATED the lectures! I probably got less than five spankings when I was a kid. I sure to remember a few of them very well and why I got them! My DS has never gotten a spanking because he just isn't the type of kid who ever pushed things far enough to get one. My DD on the other hand is a little more hard headed and has received three spankings. One of her spankings was for running away from me in a crowded parking lot.

 

[Planogirl]

I got very few spankings but I remember a few times wishing I could get one instead of the lectures. Ugh, the lectures never seemed to end.

I also tended to scream bloody murder when I very young whether I was being spanked, fussed at or just got the look. You can't go by just screaming either.

 

[Mad4Mickey]

no flames here I think we all need to raise our children the way we want.
With that being said I can tell you my DD is 22 and I have never spanked her , her daddy did one time and she never needed it again . My DS 20 on the other hand had many a spanking and he is just fine.
I didnt spank him in public but I did grab the soft part of his arm on the underside more then once and give it a tiny little pintch. Never enough to really hurt but enough to remind him where he was .

My kids were really good in public places though : ) At home a whole other story .

 

[Took]

Every child needs to be disciplined. That doesn't necessarily mean that they need to be spanked to be disciplined.

I agree. I was spanked (not beaten) and my mom will say now that she can't see it accomplished anything. I'm certain it did not. It only made me mad and upset. I LEARNED from her good example and by other forms of discipline.

I have not used spanking with our dd and have been very happy at what kind of kid she's turned out to be.

That said, I have seen kids that certainly seem to need some discipline and maybe a quick swat or two...

 

[Gagirl69]

This thread is going to get ugly....Everybody has strong opinions on this. I'm not even gonna go there.

 

[cruellababy]

I rarely spank; has to be a big deal for that; but I also use the pinch under the arm and I find my mom's fave also works wonders-a pinch at the top of the ear. There are soo many bratty and disrespectful children out there now adays; sometimes I also think- I would've smacked them by now.

 

[lemondog]

I was shopping this morning when I saw a mother spanking her child at the mall. The kid was about two or three and just screaming her head off, enough so that a security guard came up to her and asked is she needed help. What worried me was that if she was behaving that way in public, how must she act in private?

Personally, we don't spank. I think that just because you can be a bully to someone who is smaller than you doesn't mean you should.

Well, you really DON'T know how she acts in private. She may spank no more than you saw today. You are certainly entitled to your opinions but I don't think you should judge this mom based on seeing her with her child in one situation. Also, there is a big difference between spanking and beating. JMHO.

For the record, I rarely spank, I reserve it for serious, dangerous infractions like running away from me in a parking lot. And besides, my kids are really too old for spankings anyway. They respond much better to loss of toys/priveleges.

 

[SwedishMeatball]

I'll bet that mother bottle-fed and lets the kid have a tv in their room.

 

[cruellababy]

Hey Swedish meatball- I also bottlefed and my kids have tvs w cable boxes in their rooms- and they're 7 and 3- but that's another thread

 

[SwedishMeatball]

Hey Swedish meatball- I also bottlefed and my kids have tvs w cable boxes in their rooms- and they're 7 and 3- but that's another thread

Same here.

 

[SHAYMARAYSMOM]

I was shopping this morning when I saw a mother spanking her child at the mall. The kid was about two or three and just screaming her head off, enough so that a security guard came up to her and asked is she needed help. What worried me was that if she was behaving that way in public, how must she act in private?

Personally, we don't spank. I think that just because you can be a bully to someone who is smaller than you doesn't mean you should.

Was the child screaming from the spanking or was the child one of those that scream no matter what?
I work with a girl who has a screamer for a dd.

I know there will be people who will come in and totally flame you, call you a hippie or whatever but I totally agree. We grew up in a no spanking household and my brother and I are both smart, polite, considerate, well behaved adults and we were pretty good kids too. Everything with my father was about respect. he taught it to us early and our entire childhood learning and growing cycle could be related back to it. I even remember him talking to me about respect when I was like 3 or 4 years old. It took me a bit to fully understand but I thank him all the time now for taking the time to teach me respect rather than just slapping me around.

Same with the 5 of us that grew up in my house. But we would get spanked if need be

Hey Swedish meatball- I also bottlefed and my kids have tvs w cable boxes in their rooms- and they're 7 and 3- but that's another thread

Can you start that thread and hook me up with a link?

 

[ReneeA]

There have been a few rare occasions that I have spanked. Time outs and time in the bedroom work the majority of the time.

I remember my mom taking a few stray hairs at the base of my head and twisting around her finger - just tight enough to pinch pretty good. Not hurt - just enough to make me stop and think, "Hmmm...maybe I should stop while I'm ahead."

It works like a charm with both of my kids, too.

 

[dimimi]

I have a 2 year-old and I, as of recently, have smacked her on the butt or tapped her on the leg. When she openly defies me, I give her a verbal warning but sometimes she ends up physically hurting others (other kids or adults nearby) when she misbehaves and that is when I "spank" her. I never give her more than one pat on the butt or hand.

I couldn't ignore this. When she hurts others...you hurt her? She is only 2? So it's ok for mommy to hit her, but she can't hit? There are many other ways to discipline...yes, they take a little longer, but you need to teach your child to learn to act the correct way.

 

[hentob]

I managed a children's store. A woman with a child picked up one of my belts that was on a selling rack and proceeded to BEAT a two year old with it.

I told that woman that you can't do that here.

She told me with as much foul language as possible that it was her child and she could do what she wanted.

I told her you are beating that child with merchandise that is up for sell. I can't not allow you to use my stock that way.

She threw the belt on the floor and stormed out. I felt so bad for that baby!

Did I call the police? No! The company would have frowned on it. We were not even allowed to call over shoplifters. I needed my job.

There is spanking and there is abuse, and some people think they are one and the same.

I know I have thought about that child often. The incident took place in 2004.

 

[roliepolieoliefan]

I'm sorry but the OP doesn't know what lead up to the whole mall incident.

In the summer, I posted about my then 4 yo, throwing rocks at a local playground at a little girl and her grandmother. Screamed to the truck when I made her leave, then my DD unbuckled her seat belt and opened the truck door as it was moving through the parking lot.

I slammed the truck in park, got out and proceeded to yell at my DD that I was going to kill her if she did that again. The whole thing happened as a county cop watched me.

Would I kill my DD ? no! Do I usually spank her? no. But she did get spanked that day. Not condoning what the mom did, but the OP seen part of what was happening.

And BTW, my grandmother (raised me) used to hit me with a wooden spoon, and a shoe. and guess what I've never been to therapy and I don't abuse my kids.

 

[pls5286]

My children get "spanked" but only as a last resort and after other forms of discipline have failed. My kids get a verbal warning first. My DD is 5 and my DS is 12. If the same offense continues, both will be sent to their rooms for a time out....1 min for each year. If that doesn't work and when they come out they contiue the same behavior, they loose tv privilieges...that usually gets attention. It that doesnt work...we have the three strikes and your out with my DD and she will get her bottom popped usually twice with an open hand. With my son, he will usually get grounded, as spankings are not so effective with him and he has more priviliges because of age. I can remember an incident that occured about 6 months ago with him where he became very upset with me and when I took his TV from him for the night, he became very upset and began literally destroying his room including the furniture. This behavior was not acceptable in my home. I am a single mom, so there is no one but me here to deal with him, and when he is tearing down the house in a temper tantrum because he can't watch TV, I am sorry, he got his fanny tore up. He had began throwing things in his room and was breaking things...totally unacceptable behavior for a kid his age...11 1/2 at the time.