Mother spanking child at the mall.

[hentob]

I can remember an incident that occured about 6 months ago with him where he became very upset with me and when I took his TV from him for the night, he became very upset and began literally destroying his room including the furniture. This behavior was not acceptable in my home. I am a single mom, so there is no one but me here to deal with him, and when he is tearing down the house in a temper tantrum because he can't watch TV, I am sorry, he got his fanny tore up.

You responded to his violent behavior with hitting

 

[Charade]

There are good parents that spank, and there are good parents that do not spank.
There are BAD parents that spank, and there are BAD parents that do not spank.


Proof is in the pudding.

Well, that's it!!! Thats' all we need to know and this should put an end to the spanking threads!!

 

[pls5286]

The spanking occured after I had tried several times to get him to stop. Once he got a spanking...which I must say was the first one he had gotten in several years, he stopped what he was doing and realized mom meant business and wasnt playing with him. This entire incident occurred over several hours.

 

[rgf207]

my parents spanked me and I will spank my child. A whack on the butt is sometimes needed.

I see this happen too, and I don't judge it.

What I do judge is this:

2 weeks ago DW and I were at the mall. We came out a store and saw 2 parents with their kids in a stroller. They parents were saying F*** this and F*** that to eachother. DW and I looked at each other and shook our heads.

About 30 minutes we saw them again. They were still saying the same cuss words but this time the little boy in the stroller began to cry. The "father" looked at the kid and yelled "Shut the F*** up." I have never been so disgusted in my life. A lot of other people heard it and I believe someone even flagged a security guard but we didn't stick around to see what happened.

It's people like this that don't deserve to have children

 

[TomLovesBecky]

I was shopping this morning when I saw a mother spanking her child at the mall. The kid was about two or three and just screaming her head off, enough so that a security guard came up to her and asked is she needed help. What worried me was that if she was behaving that way in public, how must she act in private?

Personally, we don't spank. I think that just because you can be a bully to someone who is smaller than you doesn't mean you should.

I agree with you. Smacking a 2 year old in a public place, not good. We also do not spank. Never needed it. I think it's lazy parenting and agree with you about the bullying thing. Yes I judge people who spank. Doesn't matter to me if that offends people. Don't hit your helpless kids and I won't judge you! LOL Flame away, but I warn you I probably won't be back to read it since it's a busy week and we leave for Disney World on Sunday!

 

[*Fantasia*]

Is there such thing as spanking the hands.. okay probably not. I tap first and let him know it's a "no-no." Second time, I tap harder and let him know it's a no-no." Last time, I tap even harder.. he stops and he knows it's a no-no.

If we are out shopping in the mall and he throws tantrum, I just let him loose in the children's play area (of course watching him). He plays and plays and plays.. then he's done! He gets tired and I just put him back in the stroller, and we're ready to hit the stores again.

If this mother can't handle the child in the mall, she should just leave the child at home (I don't mean by himself) or leave him at grandma. I think she is being a selfish mom. She is probably just thinking about herself and her shoppings and not think about the child's need. The child is probably bored or hungry and just wants some attention that the mother can't give cause she is too darn busy looking for bargains.

 

[happygirl]

I couldn't ignore this. When she hurts others...you hurt her? She is only 2? So it's ok for mommy to hit her, but she can't hit? There are many other ways to discipline...yes, they take a little longer, but you need to teach your child to learn to act the correct way.

I disagree, I spank If my kid hit someone I do it to show there are consequences to there actions

 

[hentob]

I disagree, I spank If my kid hit someone I do it to show there are consequences to there actions

So, you teach your children that they should not hit by hitting? You HIT your child to send the message that HITTING is wrong?

I can't wrap my brain around that

 

[NY Disney fan]

I couldn't ignore this. When she hurts others...you hurt her? She is only 2? So it's ok for mommy to hit her, but she can't hit? There are many other ways to discipline...yes, they take a little longer, but you need to teach your child to learn to act the correct way.

And I can't ignore your comment either. Did I say I hit my child? Because I did not write that. I said I pat her ONCE on the butt so that she knows she can't hurt other people. My 2 year old knows how to follow direction so I am trying to teach her how to do that. You think negotiating with a 2 year old works? No, they know "surface" conversation but they do not know about ramifications. I would never hit or spank my child and I do not believe in starting now. I said I pat her on the bum to show her that she cannot act anyway she wants to.

And by the way, as a toddler my daughter is trying to find her coordination. I have the utmost patience with her and she has punched me in the eye, headbutted me in the jaw and kicked me in the groin. I understand that toddlers do these things and I do not fault her for this. So me patting her on the butt when she hurts other kids is serious business. Its called nipping it in the bud.

 

[tzolkin]

So, you teach your children that they should not hit by hitting? You HIT your child to send the message that HITTING is wrong?

I can't wrap my brain around that

I think some people believe that they hit to show that it hurts (?) and then the kid won't do it any more because they know they're hurting the other person.

I'm assuming like how some people think that they should bite a kid to show them that biting hurts and that they shouldn't do it. I can almost understand where people might come to that idea, but I don't believe that it could work. (For example, my niece bit my son for about 3 months and then he started biting her. They are both very aware of how much it hurts, but they continued to bite each other--very hard-- every chance they got.)

 

[hentob]

Did I say I hit my child?

No.

You said you "smacked her" when she hits others

Now it is downgraded to "patting"

 

[NY Disney fan]

This whole thread is becoming ridiculous and I refuse to even "debate" this topic with a bunch of strangers. Bye.

 

[JimmyPicker]

This whole thread is becoming ridiculous and I refuse to even "debate" this topic with a bunch of strangers. Bye.

I kind of knew this was going to happen the minute I opened this thread. And I backed away very slowly.

Me, well, flame away, but my 4 year old thought it was a blast to hit his older brother. No amount of talking would make him stop. Well, he'd stop, but then 10 minutes later, he'd be back at it again.

One day, I looked at him and said, "If you ever hit your brother again, I'm going to let him hit you back."

He tested it, and hit his brother. His brother hit him back. The youngest cried, but he learned two lessons.

1. Hitting hurts.
2. Don't hit someone unless you're prepared to be hit back.