Mother of the Year here!

[txgirl]

ok you know what? I'll be honest here. I'm a fairly liberal parent. I let my older boys (12 and 15) drink wine at Thanksgiving dinner. They play violent video games including Grand Theft Auto in various forms. My oldest occassionaly buys t-shirts with words on them that make me cringe. I've pulled my kids from school for family vacations and once when my oldest son was in second grade I totally did a Poster on the life of Abraham Lincoln for him because he was too busy at his baseball tournament to do it himself. I have moments myself, never claimed to be perfect.

And I have absolutely no problem at all stating that I think taking two 11 year olds to this particular movie, sending them off to sit by themselves and not keeping tabs on them, and then not getting up out of your seat and walking over to remove them from the theatre 20 minutes into the movie when it began to occur to you that you had gotten them in over their heads -
is just plain wrong and it is also terrifically bad parenting.

I don't have any problem at all admitting my opinion and if 73 other people come on here and tell me what a horrible woman I must be for not throwing some Pixie Dust around -- I don't care. I still feel the way I do.

Thank you for redeeming my faith in the world of parenting. You can parent hundreds of different ways and still find some common ground. You can also make mistakes as a parent and still know the difference between wise and poor judgement.

 

[Microcell]

Correct me if I am wrong, but there was a mom, her friend, and the 11 year old tagged along with them. There was no other kid, right?

You made a mistake by not walking out, lets move on. They rate things R for a reason.

That being said, raise your hand if you saw a rated R movie when you were under 18. My minister took us kids to see "Children of a Lesser God" when I was 14. My sisters are deaf and the movie was going to be captioned (a first) and I didn't want to be left home alone. He got my mother's permission. She lost mother of the year in 1987 I suppose. Or did he lose Minister of the Year?

 

[N.Bailey]

ok you know what? I'll be honest here. I'm a fairly liberal parent. I let my older boys (12 and 15) drink wine at Thanksgiving dinner. They play violent video games including Grand Theft Auto in various forms. My oldest occassionaly buys t-shirts with words on them that make me cringe. I've pulled my kids from school for family vacations and once when my oldest son was in second grade I totally did a Poster on the life of Abraham Lincoln for him because he was too busy at his baseball tournament to do it himself. I have moments myself, never claimed to be perfect.

And I have absolutely no problem at all stating that I think taking two 11 year olds to this particular movie, sending them off to sit by themselves and not keeping tabs on them, and then not getting up out of your seat and walking over to remove them from the theatre 20 minutes into the movie when it began to occur to you that you had gotten them in over their heads --

is just plain wrong and it is also terrifically bad parenting.

I don't have any problem at all admitting my opinion and if 73 other people come on here and tell me what a horrible woman I must be for not throwing some Pixie Dust around -- I don't care. I still feel the way I do.

My children are now 14 & 15, and we have every GTA game since GTA 3. I guess that includes, 3, Vice City, and San Andreas. Given a year separation (I think it's safe to say it would probably be longer than that), it means I allowed my children to play these types of games since about 11 years of age or so. IMO, allowing your child to play these types of games isn't the best parenting either. EVEN though, I am one of the parents that allows it. When I bought Vice City, the clerk at Toys R Us gave me mean looks because I was buying an M rated game and I just didn't care that it was rated, "M." She had NO clue who it was being purchased for either!! I've also seen MANY bashed for allowing their kids to play these games on various message boards. This includes older teens bashing parents for buying them for younger kids (this blew my mind, LOL) on gaming sites. Do you realize Hillary Clinton wants to get these types of games banned? Does that say that she approves of them for children?

You're certainly entitled to your opinion, but IMO, one is every bit as bad as the next.

 

[N.Bailey]

Correct me if I am wrong, but there was a mom, her friend, and the 11 year old tagged along with them. There was no other kid, right?

You made a mistake by not walking out, lets move on. They rate things R for a reason.

That being said, raise your hand if you saw a rated R movie when you were under 18. My minister took us kids to see "Children of a Lesser God" when I was 14. My sisters are deaf and the movie was going to be captioned (a first) and I didn't want to be left home alone. He got my mother's permission. She lost mother of the year in 1987 I suppose. Or did he lose Minister of the Year?

I don't know what the heck she was thinking, but my mom took me to see The Exorcist when I was about 9 or so. I do think some damage was done, LOL, but I did end up okay from the experience.

 

[pixiemomma]

My children are now 14 & 15, and we have every GTA game since GTA 3. I guess that includes, 3, Vice City, and San Andreas. Given a year separation (I think it's safe to say it would probably be longer than that), it means I allowed my children to play these types of games since about 11 years of age or so. IMO, allowing your child to play these types of games isn't the best parenting either. EVEN though, I am one of the parents that allows it. When I bought Vice City, the clerk at Toys R Us gave me mean looks because I was buying an M rated game and I just didn't care that it was rated, "M." She had NO clue who it was being purchased for either!! I've also seen MANY bashed for allowing their kids to play these games on various message boards. This includes older teens bashing parents for buying them for younger kids (this blew my mind, LOL) on gaming sites. Do you realize Hillary Clinton wants to get these types of games banned? Does that say that she approves of them for children?

You're certainly entitled to your opinion, but IMO, one is every bit as bad as the next.

This one kind of puzzled me too. I think it is fine to let your kid play GTA but the game is every bit as "adult" oriented than Hostel and probably 10x more offensive.

 

[GoofieRuthie]

I was one of the people who assumed - because she never mentioned otherwise - that the other child involved may also have had parents who didn't know what they were getting into moviewise. I doubt the parent told her "please continue to sit through a movie if you deem it inappropriate".

I also assume that this thread was started after reading the censoring music thread just to have a little fun with us. The friend was added to make it a more controversial issue.

Ok, I haven't had a chance to finish everyone's posts yet, but wanted to respond to this one. I thought it was kind of ironic that there was a post about censoring music when I was about to post about the movie. I did post on that thread first, but I didn't make this thread to be "controversial". Yes, I knew people were going to rip me a new one, but I wasn't worried about it. I am a good mother in my children's eyes and that is all that matters to me.

Now, a little background. Not that I have to explain to anyone, but want to make sure you all have the whole story. (I tried to keep from writing a novel in the OP) The friend (13)is actually my older daughters friend who had spent the night. DD13, (brace yourself for this irony) went to church and her friend didn't want to go so she went without her. DD13 called and asked if she could go with the youth group to eat and see a ballgame. I told her yes and that I would take her friend home. My husband had gone bowling and dd5 was at my mom's house. I thought DH would be home before I left and I already had plans to go to the movies. DD11 asked if she could go too. She didn't want to stay home alone (yes, I let her stay home for short periods of time, flame away). I told her what I was going to see and that it would be very gory. The synopsis (not review, sorry to have misled everyone, I beg forgiveness) that I had read did not go into detail about the nudity and sex, but did about the gore. It also focused largely on the director instead of the plot. As for the friend, she said that she would go to the movies with DD11 if I didn't care. She really wanted to see Hostel. I asked her if her mom would care and she said no. So, she called her mom and asked if she could see HOSTEL, and she said yes. Whether or not the mother has read 1000s of reviews on it, I have no idea.

As I stated on the music thread, I do not censor what my kids listen to and haven't really censored what they watch. They are good kids and have pretty level heads on their shoulders. I too watched R movies when I was younger and didn't turn out too bad. Well other than being a horrible parent that is. Thanks to everyone that has hugged me, I appreciate it, but they aren't really necessary. I knew this would be a very touchy subject. I've lurked here long enough to know. I guess I'm part of the crowd now, huh?

I'm going to read the rest of the posts now. I'll probably post again soon.

 

[txgirl]

I don't know what the heck she was thinking, but my mom took me to see The Exorcist when I was about 9 or so. I do think some damage was done, LOL, but I did end up okay from the experience.

I will say that I saw the Exorcist when I was about 14 at a friend's house and it scared us so bad we wouldn't get off the couch.....even after the movie was over. We had to wait till the parents got home. Disturbed and freaked out would have been good descriptions of how I felt!

 

[pixiemomma]

I don't know what the heck she was thinking, but my mom took me to see The Exorcist when I was about 9 or so. I do think some damage was done, LOL, but I did end up okay from the experience.

LOL. I thought my bed was moving at night for months afterwards.

 

[disfanatiks]

And I have absolutely no problem at all stating that I think taking two 11 year olds to this particular movie, sending them off to sit by themselves and not keeping tabs on them, and then not getting up out of your seat and walking over to remove them from the theatre 20 minutes into the movie when it began to occur to you that you had gotten them in over their heads --
is just plain wrong and it is also terrifically bad parenting.

I don't have any problem at all admitting my opinion and if 73 other people come on here and tell me what a horrible woman I must be for not throwing some Pixie Dust around -- I don't care. I still feel the way I do.

Well said. I agree 100%. A movie that was almost rated NC-17 is terribly inaapropriate for an 11 year old from my perspective. Of course, each parent knows thier children individually and what is and is not appropriate.

I am glad the OP came back to post that she did get permission from the parent's of the other child. I do feel much better knowing that. Thanks for coming back to let us know.

 

[Chuck S]

Lots of first stone casting going on in this thread. An "R" rated movie that was "almost" NC-17 is STILL an "R" rated movie, just like Passion of the Christ...yet folks took their kids to see that in droves. If it was that bad it SHOULD have been rated NC-17...maybe your quarrel should be with the MPAA, I haven't seen an "ALMOST NC-17" rating.

 

[disykat]

I didn't make this thread to be "controversial". Yes, I knew people were going to rip me a new one, but I wasn't worried about it. .

You got what you expected then.

 

[txgirl]

Lots of first stone casting going on in this thread. An "R" rated movie that was "almost" NC-17 is STILL an "R" rated movie, just like Passion of the Christ...yet folks took their kids to see that in droves. If it was that bad it SHOULD have been rated NC-17...maybe your quarrel should be with the MPAA, I haven't seen an "ALMOST NC-17" rating.

A lot of the "stone casting" has less to do with the initial decision to go and more to do with the decision to stay in spite of her knowledge that it was way to sexually explicit for an 11 year old. She admits that recognition from the start of the movie, yet does nothing.

 

[Toby'sFriend]

just like Passion of the Christ...yet folks took their kids to see that in droves.

They did? I don't know of any of my children's friends who saw it and my kids still haven't seen it. I wasn't aware that there were many children who did see that movie.

In fact, my kids attend an Evangelical Lutheran school that really gets into the whole "Christ on The Bloody Cross" thing during Advent. The Principal sent out a letter specifically stating that the school didn't recommend it for anybody under the age of 16 or 17.

I'm also kind of shocked to hear Children of a Lesser God was an R rated movie. Wow, R rated movies have really changed over the years if that is a comparison.

 

[disykat]

A lot of the "stone casting" has less to do with the initial decision to go and more to do with the decision to stay in spite of her knowledge that it was way to sexually explicit for an 11 year old. She admits that recognition from the start of the movie, yet does nothing.

Exactly. She herself was the one who deemed it inappropriate. I haven't seen it, I took her word for it. That is why I questioned her motives for posting. It was the first time that someone has posted that they wanted to see a movie so despite the fact that it seemed sexually inappropriate for their child they kept watching. It's seems strange to write that you made a mistake and didn't try to fix it.

 

[Beth76]

A lot of the "stone casting" has less to do with the initial decision to go and more to do with the decision to stay in spite of her knowledge that it was way to sexually explicit for an 11 year old. She admits that recognition from the start of the movie, yet does nothing.

Exactly. If she had used her "judgement" and left rather than said "Oh gee I hope it gets better" this would be a completely different thread.

Huh? What's that? Oops, Jimmy my 8 year old just took off with the car. But, it looks like he's slowing down, so he's probably bringing the car home. Wow, I can't believe he's figured out the stick shift.

 

[GoofieRuthie]

ok, I've caught up now. Sorry that everyone thought I had fled. I posted this on my lunch hour and since we aren't allowed to surf the net while working, I couldn't respond until I got home.

I admit that I had to chuckle when someone mentioned that I couldn't wait for the sex to be over and get to the torture. I hadn't even thought about how twisted that seemed. I love scary movies. I've been watching them as long as I can remember. My oldest two daughters share that love. I don't know how demented that seems to others, it's just a fact. I don't feel that either child was scarred for life. Yes, it had much more sex than I had expected, yes, I should have left, but I didn't. They sat about 5 rows in front of us, so I could see where they were.

The reviews someone posted only ONE of those mentioned the sex if you notice. I am very thick skinned and am not offended by any of the posts. If you don't like me or the way I parent, so be it. I will live. I still love this board and will always love WDW.

I think that about covers it.

 

[nwdisgal]

I don't know what the heck she was thinking, but my mom took me to see The Exorcist when I was about 9 or so. I do think some damage was done, LOL, but I did end up okay from the experience.

Yah.. The sight of split green soup has never been the same to me since. My male friend and I went to see Exorcist when we were teenagers. They had a re-run of it in the theaters. My friend and I snuck into the Exorcist movie after buying tickets for a tamer movie playing at the same time in another theater at the same complex. There is no way we could have been in that theater legally then, because I think that movie was rated R and neither of us were 17. Well, we thought we were really cool you know, watching this horror movie and all, and then they came to the famous "puke green soup" scene ... We were out of that theater so fast (running was more like it).

 

[Chuck S]

They did? I don't know of any of my children's friends who saw it and my kids still haven't seen it. I wasn't aware that there were many children who did see that movie.

They sure did, in fact many churches in the area took their youth groups to see it.

 

[vivilasvegas]

ok, I've caught up now. Sorry that everyone thought I had fled. I posted this on my lunch hour and since we aren't allowed to surf the net while working, I couldn't respond until I got home.

I admit that I had to chuckle when someone mentioned that I couldn't wait for the sex to be over and get to the torture. I hadn't even thought about how twisted that seemed. I love scary movies. I've been watching them as long as I can remember. My oldest two daughters share that love. I don't know how demented that seems to others, it's just a fact. I don't feel that either child was scarred for life. Yes, it had much more sex than I had expected, yes, I should have left, but I didn't. They sat about 5 rows in front of us, so I could see where they were.

The reviews someone posted only ONE of those mentioned the sex if you notice. I am very thick skinned and am not offended by any of the posts. If you don't like me or the way I parent, so be it. I will live. I still love this board and will always love WDW.

I think that about covers it.

I love scary movies too.

Your kid will be fine, you admit you should have left, now you know better for next time.....but I bet there's still gonna be another 10 pages on how awful you are!!

 

[barkley]

my "gore flick" pursuits ended relativly quickly when i was a teen. i talked my mom into taking me to see "the omen" (i was jr. high or high school?) one weekend when dad was away on a trip. she was not thrilled with it (to say the least) but then we come home and go to let the dog in, to find the dog, the patio and the door to the garage splattered with blood (a burgler tried to get in and the dog got a good enuf bite into him to make a lasting impression). my mom still equates that movie with the later events of the night

we still rib my neice about getting one over on grandma years ago. grandma was babysitting and took dn to the video store. dn grabs 2 disneyesque type movies and "silence of the lambs". grandma questions it and dn says "oh grandma, it's a nice nature movie about sheep and lambs" so grandma rents the whole batch. later that night dn pops the video in (thinking grandma has dozed off on the couch) and grandma wakes in time to hear the immortal line "i ate his liver with fava beans and a nice ciante".
there was a strict no rental policy on grandmas part