Mother-In-Law overstepping her boundaries...

[beaucoup]

I would bet she didn't just stop at his. She probably looked up your DH's and yours too. She's probably not telling you everything.

Depending upon what she actually looked up & what she actually was able to see, I would report her.

 

[hereyago]

How would you go about alerting your DS"s dr? somehow I think you''d have to mention the breech of your MIL, wouldn't you? I don't understand the mentality that "family" gets to have a carte blanche to do things, cross boundaries and such that if weren't family, it wouldn't be a discussion.

I wish you luck. I am sure your DH is very "used" to her behavior and he doesn't want to rock the boat.

 

[Nolcrest]

This wouldn't bother me at all. As long as she wasn't blabbing my information to everyone. But I also get along w/my in-laws.

People see all kinds of info online. It's not that they see it but what they do w/it that I'd be concerned with.


Just tell her how you feel in a non-confrontational way and let it go.

 

[Cinderella94]

People see all kinds of info online. It's not that they see it but what they do w/it that I'd be concerned with.

Someone stumbling upon information on facebook or something like that is a case in which your statement "people see all kinds of info online" makes sense. In this case, the MIL actually had to go looking for it, and she was not authorized to do that either. Not the same thing.

 

[Sadie22]

She did break the law. There are or soon will be measures in place so that those who access electronic medical records they have no reason to look at will suffer the consequences. An electronic trail is created and institutions are required to maintain records in accordance with the laws. Somone is in charge of maintaining security. MIL needs to be aware of changes in the laws due to HIPAA and HITECH. If MIL has not had recent training on these laws, she needs to do so. She could lose her license and her job. It does not matter if the patient involved was a family member. This is more than you being annoyed, OP.

 

[My sister's princess]

Put me in the boat of not really caring. Maybe she thought because of her relationship with your husband, it was ok. From the sounds of it, your husband doesn't really have a problem with it.

Not worth WWIII it would start.

 

[Buckalew11]

And you know, this is more common that people think. People tell their hairdressers a lot.

 

[emer95]

I would be VERY upset! Not only because it's illegal, but also because I would consider it a huge insult to me as a mother! Was she checking up on you to see if you had your son's immunizations up to date because she thought you might have missed one? How rude and nosey. And NONE of her business!!

 

[OceanAnnie]

I am not sure I wouldn't....if she is looking up your sons, she is looking you up as well as DH and probably all her neighbors.

That's exactly what I thought. You have all sorts of trouble afoot.

 

[hereyago]

I am not sure I wouldn't....if she is looking up your sons, she is looking you up as well as DH and probably all her neighbors.

Creeper alert. but you know, it could be very true.

 

[Wishing on a star]

Wow, just WOW.....

There is NO way that her illegal actions have been limited to this.

Since when is this kind of illegal behavior EVER justified.

OP, you have a very real problem.

I imagine this means that she has access to things like your SS#.

I can only say, as I have said several times before here on the DIS, if your husband feels that this kind of illegal breach is okay... Your problem is with him.

I would take steps, RIGHT NOW, to secure every bit on online information that you possibly can. One by one... Every record that you can possibly come up with should be closed, changed, flagged for identity theft, etc....


It shouldn't amaze me, but I guess it still does get me sometimes, to see those that think... "it's 'family' so they can screw me." My money is always on the possiblity that those who would ever express that viewpoint are The Relative who feels that THEY should be limited by NO boundaries.


Sorry, but until you and your husband are on the same page, you can only except that you are being violated.

I see NO other middle ground or choice.

 

[AKL_Megs]

Hey, I'd take a medical record nosy MIL over MY anti-immunization preaching MIL and her crazy out there information bits ANY DAY. Can we trade?

 

[sbtrfly74]

She will get caught... everything you do on a database is tracked! I've seen many nursing students get booted for looking up someones information, and regular employee's as well. Doubt that this is a one time thing that she only looked up her grandchild, and not sure how long she's been doing this.. but I would suspect eventually she will get caught and will loose her job. Medical databases are mostly secure and would track every person, page, date, time, how long, etc, etc. was looked at under her user name. She will get asked why she looked up someone from this county or city, whatever.

Cant advise whether to rat her out or not that is a hard situation for you... but you have every right to be pissed and I wouldn't let her hear the end of it instead of trying not to rock the boat until I got a major apology and she realizes that this is a big deal.

 

[MegaDisney]

I guess I'm just wondering what the heck she was looking for? What if you and your DH were not vaccinating? Was she looking for proof of something along those lines? That would be my concern. I'm guessing you do vaccinate and that there was nothing that caught her attention- but what if there was? Your decisions about your child are YOUR decisions...not hers. Grandma or not, she needs to seriously back off.

 

[cm8]

She will get caught... everything you do on a database is tracked! I've seen many nursing students get booted for looking up someones information, and regular employee's as well. Doubt that this is a one time thing that she only looked up her grandchild, and not sure how long she's been doing this.. but I would suspect eventually she will get caught and will loose her job. Medical databases are mostly secure and would track every person, page, date, time, how long, etc, etc. was looked at under her user name. She will get asked why she looked up someone from this county or city, whatever.

Cant advise whether to rat her out or not that is a hard situation for you... but you have every right to be pissed and I wouldn't let her hear the end of it instead of trying not to rock the boat until I got a major apology and she realizes that this is a big deal.

 

[justhat]

Clearly I am in the minority, but I couldn't care less if my MIL looked up any or all of my kids immunization records. If the secretary of my kids school can see them, so can my MIL. I can't for the life of me see why this is a big deal.

Now, if she were looking up personal items (which do not include vaccines for me), then I could see being upset, but even then, if I had a health problem, my MIL would know about it anyway, as either I or my husband would tell her. And it's not like we're best friends or anything, heck, I rarely see my MIL cause she lives in another state. But she's family regardless, so if something were wrong, I'd want all the support we could get.

But vaccines? The whole world could see them for all I care.

 

[Gigi22]

Yes, she will get caught. I remember having a major "Come to Jesus" meeting with some people who worked for me, during which I explained that the computers they used at work are the employer's property and were constantly monitored. Some of them wouldn't believe me! I finally had to tell them that if they were doing something improper on the computers at work, they would be found out, and punished.

 

[Disney Doll]

She'll get caught. I do Healthcare Informatics as part of my role as a nurse in my hospital and believe me, when someone wants to find who's looking at what information, they can.

 

[Tuffcookie]

On the way home from dinner Friday night, she told my DS (age 4) that she had pulled up his immunization records online recently to look at them.

Why, in the world, would you tell a 4 year old about it?

While I agree she had no place doing this, I think you need to have your DH have a talk with his mother. If it comes from you, you could have world war III.

And, no, I would not report her to anyone. This is your MIL...For better or worse!

TC

 

[Leajess99]

Clearly I am in the minority, but I couldn't care less if my MIL looked up any or all of my kids immunization records. If the secretary of my kids school can see them, so can my MIL. I can't for the life of me see why this is a big deal.

Now, if she were looking up personal items (which do not include vaccines for me), then I could see being upset, but even then, if I had a health problem, my MIL would know about it anyway, as either I or my husband would tell her. And it's not like we're best friends or anything, heck, I rarely see my MIL cause she lives in another state. But she's family regardless, so if something were wrong, I'd want all the support we could get.

But vaccines? The whole world could see them for all I care.

I only know of one place local where my kids' immunizations would be in the computer and even there the whole set of immunizations are not listed as they have been immunized in different states, doctors, etc.

I could really care less as well especially with the number of people already seeing the vaccination record. Now if she were looking up financial information than i would have an issue because my finances are MY business. My ex MIL is a nurse in another state and we talk a lot about medical stuff.