Marrieds choosing not to have kids

[Donald's Fan in PHX!]

My wife would say Nerd works for me. Fine by me, Disney, Xbox, and Sports...that sums me up.

 

[Barthy73]

No freaks here.. nerds, yes... dorks, definitely...

But our dog loves us, and our neighbors love our bar. LOL

 

[zima-cheryl]

Yes, I teach and perform Tribal Style Bellydance Different style than you see the dancers at the Moroccan pavilion, but bellydance nonetheless.
http://www.mandalatribal.com - my classes
http://www.infusiontribal.com - my pro troupe
http://www.tribalbellydance.org - an informational resource I created

Awesome! I've been at it about 4 years now... still wonder which is my right or left foot some days!
Too bad you are out on the "left coast"... I'd love to see your troupe.

Saana is my instructor. She teaches a more traditional style.
http://www.sanaa-amel.com/

When we are at Epcot I must make DH take in every belly dance show of the day. Poor guy is a good sport.
As he says... why complain when your wife is dragging you off to watch a belly dancer?!?

 

[LeesyUD]

Wow I was so shocked to find this thread. I couldn't believe how many people had the same feelings I do. I am 27 and engaged and though I love kids and wanted them when I was younger, I have gotten into the real world and decided that I just don't want my own kids in my future. Honestly alot of the reason is because I suffer from a form of Bipolar disorder and although I am described as "high functioning" I have had alot of severe depression and anxiety episodes and I just don't feel it would be right for me to bring a child into this world when I have these periods where I can not even take care of myself. I think that if I didn't have that to deal with and I was in a better place with a career I would be much more likely to want to have kids, and a tiny ounce of me does still want them. But for me I just know in my heart it is not right and not something I can handle. I think there are so many people bringing kids into this world that cannot handle it emotionally or financially. And I think that is something everyone should consider before having children. I think it is important to make sure that you are prepared to do everything in the world to protect and provide for your children and that you have the means to do it. I admittedly do not have the means. So that is where I am at.

Luckily I have a wonderful fiance who when I told him I did not want to have kids said "The most important thing for me is that I am with you. If we ever decided having kids would be right for us then I think it would just be an extra bonus. We could decide to never have kids and I would still be a happy man as long as I am with you." That was music to my ears

 

[Donald's Fan in PHX!]

welcome

 

[Donald's Fan in PHX!]

No freaks here.. nerds, yes... dorks, definitely...

But our dog loves us, and our neighbors love our bar. LOL

We love our nerdy dogs

 

[LeesyUD]

welcome

Thank you! Your dogs are so cute, I love labs. I have had two golden retreivers though my 1 year old, I got her with my dad while I had moved back with them for a while, but I had to leave her there bc she was more for my dad, but I got so attached, she is my baby. I still consider her my dog too (I am officially a co owner woo hoo) but I still visit her all the time. When my fiance and I get somewhere we are allowed to have dogs we have both agreed that it will be our "baby" and will be spoiled rotten.

 

[maddhatir]

Welcome Leesy!!!

And Steve, your dogs are adorable! I love the "superman" shot- you should photoshop a cape on the pup!!!

 

[Shyvioletisme]

Luckily I have a wonderful fiance who when I told him I did not want to have kids said "The most important thing for me is that I am with you. If we ever decided having kids would be right for us then I think it would just be an extra bonus. We could decide to never have kids and I would still be a happy man as long as I am with you." That was music to my ears

WELCOME!!! and it sounds like you've got an AMAZING fiance!!

 

[maddhatir]

I have a few more "classic" song remakes by a few of my bands!

If anyone is a Twisted Sister fan and loved the song "Burn in He!!" check this crazy remake by Dimmu Borgir!!

This is just a video someone made up on You Tube and put some random pics along with some Dimmu pics to the song.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3IuzkGz9uD4


AND- any Neil Young fans?? How about a "Cinnamon Girl" remake from Type O Negative .......who I am ADDICTED to - that is the only CD I have in my player right now!

UGH! It has been so long since a band has given me, goosebumps, chills, almost brings me to tears b/c of their sound, makes my heart do flip flops AND makes me just want to...... ALL AT ONCE just from any song they play! I can't beleive I have passed these guys by for so long!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p0bHCY865xs

.

 

[TKDisneylover]

Luckily I have a wonderful fiance who when I told him I did not want to have kids said "The most important thing for me is that I am with you. If we ever decided having kids would be right for us then I think it would just be an extra bonus. We could decide to never have kids and I would still be a happy man as long as I am with you." That was music to my ears

And who says there are not any good guys left in the world? Sound like you got yourself a great one!

We love our nerdy dogs

I LOVE PET PICS!!! Your two are so cute! And I agree with maddhatir about the Superman one!

 

[maddhatir]

OMG I am FA-REAKING OUT!

I just ordered tix for Type O Negative in Philly July 2nd!! I am screaming like a little school girl in my head!!!

 

[LeesyUD]

And who says there are not any good guys left in the world? Sound like you got yourself a great one!

Yea he is great, he is probably the most understanding and least judgmental guy I have ever meant. Oh but boy are we both stubborn! We bicker so much! But its ok cause usually it lasts like 2 seconds and then we are fine.

 

[TKDisneylover]

OMG I am FA-REAKING OUT!

I just ordered tix for Type O Negative in Philly July 2nd!! I am screaming like a little school girl in my head!!!

Hey, congrats on the tix! You are going to have so much fun! How are you going to stand listening to that guys voice for for what, three hours or something? Your DH is going to have to hold you up just to get you through it!

What kind of seats did you get?

 

[Shyvioletisme]

OMG I am FA-REAKING OUT!

I just ordered tix for Type O Negative in Philly July 2nd!! I am screaming like a little school girl in my head!!!

ooh have fun Madd...they are going to be in Dallas this summer too...but I don't know if we'll go

 

[maddhatir]

ooh have fun Madd...they are going to be in Dallas this summer too...but I don't know if we'll go

You like Type O???? I will let you know how the concert is and you can decide!

Hey, congrats on the tix! You are going to have so much fun! How are you going to stand listening to that guys voice for for what, three hours or something? Your DH is going to have to hold you up just to get you through it!

What kind of seats did you get?

I will fainting all over the place > this is me

This is me listening to Peter sing>>



They are playing in a club- there are no "assigned" seating- first come first serve. But what is good about this place is, the upstairs is 21 and over b/c the bars are up there and all the seating is up there- the kidletts like to be on the floor anyway to mosh it up- but not too sure about the crowd for this band.

They might be a little older since they have been around for years- and not sure of you can really mosh to this music- it think it will be more of a goth crowd- can't see the goths moshing, they might get some of their piercings caught up in something (I can say that w/o offending anyone b/c I have piercings- isn't that how it works?? )

I want to get there really early to get a good seat upstairs though. DH is gonna have to get the heck out of work early for this one!

He took my Best of Type O CD this morning for the Jeep- he has the top down and I had to warn his not to blast the first song on the CD "Unsuccessfully Coping With The Natural Beauty Of Infidelity" b/c they cuss and it is kind of a nasty song for unsuspecting ears I love it though- he is just a tad bit POd in that song!

 

[Shyvioletisme]

oh trust me, there will be people trying to mosh...DH and I have gone to several shows where we didn't expect people to find a way and what not..and yup there they were going at it...
I'm like you, I'd much prefer to be upstairs...I get a good view without being stuck behind that one tall guy who I SWEAR follows me around to every show and no chance of being harmed at the hands of the pit...
Definitely let me know how it was..

 

[maddhatir]

I get a good view without being stuck behind that one tall guy who I SWEAR follows me around to every show and no chance of being harmed at the hands of the pit...
.

OMG- when we saw Dimmu- there was this one guy in the pit- I swear to you he could have been a "cro-magnon man'! He was huge- His face was poker striaght the entire time and he looked like no matter what came his way- he would take it down!


ITA- I love to be above the crowd to see what's going on b/c they are part of the show If I were on the floor, my luck- I would be picked up over someone's head and passed around and thrown onstage

I would just do one of these and then take a dive

 

[Googelibear]

I am 32 years old. I have been married since I was 25 (celebrating our 7th anniversary at WDW).

DH and I choose not to have children. I have never wanted to have children. Early in our marriage, people asked questions about kids, and we always said, "We aren't having any. We are happy as we are."

I guess they thought we were bluffing, because the questions have been coming hard and fast.

My usual responses, depending on the questioning:
"No, we are not having children"
"No, we are not planning on having children."
"We don't want to have children - our dogs are enough."
"We don't want children - we are very happy with our life as it is."
"We choose not to have chidren."
"We choose to be child-free."
"We choose not to be parents."
"We want to be good aunts and uncles, and that will satisfy us"

People keep on asking, and they don't find my answers acceptable. They don't feel that my choice is VALID?

It makes me angry, but it also makes me sad. I think a lot of people are having children because it is expected of them, and not what they really want.

Any one want to give their input - I would appreciate it!

I know exactly what you're living. If those answers aren't good enough for who ever is nosey enough to want to know, tough.

DH and I lived for 14 years like that. It's none of anyone's busineess.

I should add that something happened to us and - Surprise- we suddenly found ourselves pregnant with twin boys. It turned out to be a good thing, but not something I wished for :wink:

 

[LeesyUD]

My fiance's best friend's wife is alway making comments about how we would make good parents and how soon will we have kids after we get married. We also try to skirt the issue bc she can be so snobby!! One time we were at a bday party for her daughters (they are like niece's to us) and at the time me and my fiance had move in with my parents for financial reasons. Out of nowhere in front of all her friends and family that we did not know she goes "So are you guys still living with your parents?" Now I was not embarrassed to tell that to my friends or family but I was so mad that she announced in front of all these people that stared at us. Ugh it made me so made, I do not tell her anything about us now and I make sure that my fiance does not either. And I will continue to ignore her on kids comments as well.