Love can be equal, but is it?

[tmarquez]

Your child (lets say your first child for those that have more than 1) and your husband/significant other have fallen over the edge of a cliff.

They are both perilously hanging on by the tips of their fingers. Nobody else is around. They are slipping and you have seconds to act.

You have the time and strength to save only one. What would you do?

 

[Magpie]

Your child (lets say your first child for those that have more than 1) and your husband/significant other have fallen over the edge of a cliff.

They are both perilously hanging on by the tips of their fingers. Nobody else is around. They are slipping and you have seconds to act.

You have the time and strength to save only one. What would you do?

That's not about LOVE! I'd save a stranger's child before I saved my husband, and I don't know that child at all, much less love him.

I'd do it because that's what my husband would expect me to do. Because it's always children first. And because I'd hope my husband had some ability to hang on a fraction longer, so I'd grab the kid, toss him to the side, and THEN grab my husband.

It's not about love. It's a triage situation.

I'm not answering the poll, because there's no "other" option. Also because I am too fundamentally optimistic to ever believe in such a thing as "certain death".

 

[tlbwriter]

I'd save my child, not because I love her more, but because it is my duty to protect her. And if I were the one hanging from the cliff with her, I would expect my husband to do the same thing.

 

[tmarquez]

Wow, I feel a little bad now because there is no way I would save a stranger (child or not) over DH.

That's not about LOVE! I'd save a stranger's child before I saved my husband, and I don't know that child at all, much less love him.

I'd do it because that's what my husband would expect me to do. Because it's always children first. And because I'd hope my husband had some ability to hang on a fraction longer, so I'd grab the kid, toss him to the side, and THEN grab my husband.

It's not about love. It's a triage situation.

I'm not answering the poll, because there's no "other" option. Also because I am too fundamentally optimistic to ever believe in such a thing as "certain death".

 

[tmarquez]

Agreed. And if my DH saved me instead of our child...I would probably kill him.

I'd save my child, not because I love her more, but because it is my duty to protect her. And if I were the one hanging from the cliff with her, I would expect my husband to do the same thing.

 

[Arielle22]

I would save the child first because protecting the child is what DH and I believe in.

There was an incident recently in MA where a girl was knocked out of a motorized dingy and the dingy was circling her in the water. Her father jumped in and saved her. Every time the motor came near them he pulled her underway out of the way of the propellor. In the process the propellor hit him twice, in the arm and in the head. In my book the parent should do exactly that.

 

[DeaverTex]

My child is an adult now. If he and Mrs. Tex were hanging on that cliff, I'd grab both of them. And hang on. And hang on. And hang on. Until someone showed up who could help, or they dragged me down with them.

 

[Magic Mom]

My husband would expect me to save the child, and he wouldn't be able to live knowing a child died so he could live. So I'd choose the child.

 

[punkin]

I would throw my DH under the bus for my children; he would throw me under the same bus; we would both willingly jump in front of that bus for our children. That's called being a parent. I love my DH because I KNOW that he puts my children first!

 

[Liberty Belle]

That's not about LOVE! I'd save a stranger's child before I saved my husband, and I don't know that child at all, much less love him.

I'd do it because that's what my husband would expect me to do. Because it's always children first. And because I'd hope my husband had some ability to hang on a fraction longer, so I'd grab the kid, toss him to the side, and THEN grab my husband.

It's not about love. It's a triage situation.

I'm not answering the poll, because there's no "other" option. Also because I am too fundamentally optimistic to ever believe in such a thing as "certain death".

I agree. It's what my husband would want me to do and what I'd want him to do in the same situation.

 

[Liberty Belle]

My child is an adult now. If he and Mrs. Tex were hanging on that cliff, I'd grab both of them. And hang on. And hang on. And hang on. Until someone showed up who could help, or they dragged me down with them.

 

[ncmickeyluvr]

I know with absolute certainty that I would never have to make that choice. My dh would let go before choosing became an option....and I would do the same.

 

[abdmom]

Having lost my dh (but not a child), I know what life is like without him. Knowing what I know now, if I had the choice, I would save dh. I have other children.

 

[PrincessKsMom]

Having lost my dh (but not a child), I know what life is like without him. Knowing what I know now, if I had the choice, I would save dh. I have other children.

Don't you think you might feel the same had you lost a child instead of your husband?

 

[DebIreland]

I would throw my DH under the bus for my children

Just for kicks? Like even if there was no tragedy?





(Sorry, I'm in a giddy mood).

 

[Liberty Belle]

Having lost my dh (but not a child), I know what life is like without him. Knowing what I know now, if I had the choice, I would save dh. I have other children.

Wow. I'm not judging you and I am very sorry for your loss, but this is so foreign to me.

 

[SLK1]

Agreed. And if my DH saved me instead of our child...I would probably kill him.

And now we have a Shakesperean tragedy at hand...

 

[Kat77]

That's not about LOVE! I'd save a stranger's child before I saved my husband, and I don't know that child at all, much less love him.

I'd do it because that's what my husband would expect me to do. Because it's always children first. And because I'd hope my husband had some ability to hang on a fraction longer, so I'd grab the kid, toss him to the side, and THEN grab my husband.

It's not about love. It's a triage situation.

I'm not answering the poll, because there's no "other" option. Also because I am too fundamentally optimistic to ever believe in such a thing as "certain death".

ITA. Fantastic answer!

 

[Conservative Hippie]

I would save my child. I would much rather deal with the pain of living without my spouse and having my children grow up without a father, than have to live with the pain of my children never growing up at all. My husband would choose the same. I am charged with protecting my children. I'm their mother, it's my job. If I had to throw myself off of the cliff to save them, I would. It's my job. Some people might think they have or can have more children, but you know I can find another husband and father for my children if I had to. Not saying oh, whatever, he's replaceable, not at all. He's no more replaceable than either one of my children are. I love them all dearly, but it's couldn't neglect my parental duty to save my spouse.

 

[MM27]

Having lost my dh (but not a child), I know what life is like without him. Knowing what I know now, if I had the choice, I would save dh. I have other children.