Losing a parent - sadness/depression

[maxaroni]

So sorry for your loss. You sound like you are doing very well and it's thoughtful of you to reach out to others who share your pain.

Thank you for your kind words. It is so very hard but the timing of OP thread really hit home. We lost our moms only a couple of days apart and it helped to reach out knowing we are going through it at the same time. It is so surreal...some days I "forget" and think she is just in the hospital, as she was in so often. Then it hits me she is gone.

 

[shortbun]

The pain you are feeling is normal and happens to most people who lose a parent they are close too. The deaths of each of my parents made me feel like I could not breathe. I had incredible grief. I stayed in and I just ached with the overwhelming feeling of emptiness. It got better without me realizing it was happening. I took months, not weeks. I worked hard to find good things to remember and talked with my husband and son about the happy times, traditions, favorite sayings, etc. I tried really hard to put myself in a place of joy about the good. Some days it was impossible. It got easier. Today, 7 years after the death of my dad and almost 4 years after losing my mom, I am mostly happy for the memories. I talk out loud to them, in private, sometimes. The other day, something really bad happened and I got in bed and wished I could call my mom. You are normal OP and your friends won't be tired of hearing about it just yet. Hang in there!

 

[Luvchefmic]

I have had you all in my heart and in my prayers I was in NY and got home a week ago but just now thought I would stop in and send love/prayers I was sick when in NY and never did get to go to the cemetery It was pretty upsetting to me but it's consoling to know that flowers have been left there since then

Have a blessed day

Ruthie

 

[Luvchefmic]

Thought I'd stop by again and tell you all I've been thinking of you

 

[SouthJersey]

I am posting here only because I need somewhere to get my feelings out. I can't post on my FB - well I could, but . . . I think my friends might think I'm a big baby for all my posts I've made recently about my mother.

My mom passed away on March 3. We buried her on March 7. Tomorrow will be two weeks since her funeral. She was absolutely my best friend. We really enjoyed each other's company. Before she was sick, we would always lunch together and go shopping, or just spend the day with each other looking through her cookbooks trying to find new recipes to try out. I talked to her on the phone at least every other day. We loved baking together.

Three years ago, she was diagnosed with cancer and given six months to live. I know that we got a lot more time with her than what the doctors had predicted. After her diagnosis and after she came home from the hospital, she had a Hospice nurse come to the house once a week. On Monday, February 24, she came down with pneumonia. They moved her from her house to the inpatient Hospice center on Thursday, February 27. My husband and I went to see her the next day, Friday. I was really optimistic about her chances of making it back home. We were all optimistic. She was eating okay, she had nice coloring in her face, she was talking and laughing. Saturday and Sunday, both, I got good reports that she was doing well. We got a bad snow storm Sunday and she made us all promise not to come up to Hospice to visit. She never liked any of us out and about driving in the stuff. The nurse said she was doing well Sunday. Then, Sunday night, something happened. They think she aspirated. Monday morning we got the call to come to Hospice because she wasn't doing well. She passed that night at 6:30.

I have never felt such pain in my life. There is such an emptiness inside of me. It's been two weeks since she's passed, and it already feels like she's been gone for an eternity. I miss her so much. There have been times already where I will reach for the phone to call her, and then remember that I can't. I can't stop crying. My mom was the greatest person. She was so loving and kind, and was always there for us. I am 46 and my mom was 68. I feel like a five year old child. I just want my mommy. I miss her so, so much.

Sorry for the long post and ramblings, but I just need an outlet.

I know I'm a bit late for the OP, but sorry for your loss.

You made this post at only two weeks after your loss, everything you're feeling is absolutely normal. As for your friends, you lost a parent, nobody is going to think you're being a baby.

The first year as a whole is the hardest. I lost two people last year - my 26 year old brother and my best friend (24) since I was four years old. As soon as things start to feel easy, there's that first holiday or event that they're not there and it hits you all over again.

Don't be afraid to open up to your friends, the more people who are there for you the better it tends to be. I kept everything bottled up at first and it was just making everything worse.

 

[maxaroni]

Thought I'd stop by again and tell you all I've been thinking of you

Thanks. My mom would have been 78 on 5/2. Dad wanted to go out for dinner as he didn't want to be alone. Next up...Mother's Day. It's been 2 months and just so hard.

 

[Luvchefmic]

Thanks. My mom would have been 78 on 5/2. Dad wanted to go out for dinner as he didn't want to be alone. Next up...Mother's Day. It's been 2 months and just so hard.

This is what brought me back here again being bombarded with Mother's Day everywhere you turn every store every commercial I understand how painful that can be I will look for the same love and support come Father's Day

 

[DebbieB]

Mother's Day is hard for me. Not only because my mom is gone, but the last 6 Mothers Days before she died we went to WDW around that time. After I bought DVC in late 1999, we would stay at OKW in May and BWV in early December. I have a picture that was taken of us at Epcot on Mothers Day 2005, I look at it and can't believe she was gone 4 1/2 months later. I don't have children and strangers will say "Happy Mother's Day" and it will cut like a knife.