I am praying for your DFIL, and for peace and strength for all of you.
As for your planning - Yikes!

It is so hard be "the one" in charge of planning for everyone and try to figure it all out. No matter what you choose, someone will second guess you.
You sound like those of us on the Control Freaks and Worry Wart thread - come on over if you want to worry an control with us!
http://disboards.com/showthread.php?t=2217413
Thanks

and
I actually "gave up" control a long time ago in most areas. It isn't something anyone can really have (or should have) in a blended family. I am surprisingly ok with all of that. It just requires flexibility. There are very few things I can control and all I can do is my best. If it works out, great, if it doesn't, at least I know I tried. That is not to say there aren't moments of great frustration but for the most part I can roll with things. These recent changes are just part of the process and almost funny.
Second guessing, yes, that's a given and again I'll roll with it.

I used to worry a LOT more than I do. Now I worry but at a much healthier distance.
I could absolutely choose to do none of this. I want to do it to at least make the effort to try and schedule something and I do know it is appreciated even if Jeff thinks I'm nuts at times. I think for me, having a trip to plan is my way of having something that is mine, to control though. I can't control soccer or school schedules or how their mom will react. I can plan a trip.
And that is something for me.
One word! Margins!
Just sounds like you really have a lot on your plate. Are you sure you're taking care of Cythnia?? I don't mean it to sound like you should be selfish, but you really are dishing out a lot for others. Don't let guilt get in the way of prioritizing and saying "no" if you need to.
Sermon over.
I really hope that the soccer can be worked out so that a family vacation can happen; those are important too! Ok, NOW my sermon is over. Really, didn't mean to be preachy!
I'd say stay with what you've got- I know Sandie would really love it, and SAB? The pictures look fabulous! How can you go wrong with that?
Oh I joke about the guilt with my sister. She never asks for ANYTHING and it's the least I can do and isn't a big deal. It would be a different story if she was asking all the time, but she really doesn't. It's just crummy timing. I do know how to say no. I am not always great at it but I do know how. This time of year is crazy but 99% of it is all stuff I chose to do, willingly.
I am one of those people who does better, a lot better, with a lot on their plate. I am not good with too much free time.
As to soccer well...it's just not that simple. I wish it were, but it's not. As a general rule, no one misses a tournament. Families schedule vacations around them and if there is a conflict, either they reschedule, cancel or don't take the soccer player with them. Every once in a while, if it is a more "minor" tournament, someone will miss something for a previously planned vacation that was booked before the schedule was out but as the girls get older that is less and less so.
I realize that sounds insane and unless you are in that scenario, really hard to understand. I can see both sides. Realistically over the summer there will probably be 4 tournaments which, in concept should be easy to schedule around. When you choose to play at this level, you make that choice. The problem is that every year you retry out for your team in the spring and don't get the summer schedule until about a month before it even starts. For some trips, planning around that works. For things like this, it won't. We tried it last year, just waiting until the schedule came out and planning around it, thinking that since all we wanted to do was camp, it would be fine.
We couldn't find a single week that worked.
There was no family trip.
Part of the effort behind all of this is a determination not to have that happen again. The reality is we like to travel, we get cranky when we don't and we get cranky when we don't have a solid week "off". We had several short (long weekend) type trips this year.
They were a ton of fun. They were busy. They were not truly relaxing. Not long enough to actually feel like you were on vacation, just a nice day away or a nice weekend. We need that. Jeff especially lol! August feels REALLY far away but at least is something we can look forward to.
Kendall's schedule is further complicated by something called ODP. Which is a good thing, for her. It really is. That's in July. FD isn't in July so to me it's kind of irrelevant lol. Bottom line is she works hard, she wants this and has earned it and to the best of our ability we support it. HS tryouts are a big deal as she will want to make JV, not the freshman team and we get that, it's not even a question. She may just have to make a choice. It is not helped by her mom who will definitely push soccer over time with us. Soccer is her life. Were it just us, if there is a conflict, I think soccer would win and Jeff knows that and it devastates him.
However, add in Grandma and it becomes a different story in terms of how much his ex will push her agenda or not. So...it is what it is. We are narrowed down to a 7 day window for Disney and I've tacked Nick on at the front. It is as good a shot at tournament free weekends as we can guesstmate with what we know. Regardless of any tournament she "could" make it during the week and miss practices. She will be 14. She should be able to fly on her own if she needs to. Will she? Will her mother allow that? That's an entirely different question. I can't control that and so I refuse to worry about it. It will be what it will be.
Assuming all things stay the same we will just book tickets in April or so and try to make sure hers is refundable or just recognize that we may be eating a change fee. That's about all we can do! That and brainwash both kids between now and then as to how wonderful the trip will be
I do plenty for me, I promise. I went to a "bag and bling" party on Saturday, had some wine and bought 2 cute knock off purses that I don't really need. One for fall and one that will be a great plane carry on lol! Actually I'm going to use it for my girls weekend. I only let myself look at the clearance section and kept in my budget for it but...I don't really need them. I do like them! I also hit the gym. I had a long lunch with my sisters on friday after wedding dress shopping.
And I ordered a potential park bag. It may arrive today.
Plenty selfish
Oh and on that selfish note?
We are sticking with YC. I felt we should at least re-evaluate since the options were open but the bottom line is it feels right. when it is time to book tickets, if we know that we are only 8 (no Doug for work or no Kendall) we might try to switch to a BCV 2 bedroom but that's the only change I'd foresee us making and that would be a long shot.
I've always wanted to stay at an Epcot resort. When Sandie and I first started talking about this last April, we were looking at BC. SAB and August.
It's meant to be.