LET THE FLAMES BEGIN>>>adult only dining

[chobie]

Just because a restaurant offers a kids menu doesn't automatically give rude parents the right to allow their kids to misbehave. Just because it is Disney does not give rude parents the right to allow their children to misbehave. If your children can handle a nice restaurant experience then so much the better. I am sorry if I don't want my nice dinner with my wife disturbed by someone who feels that they need to teach their children to eat in nice places. If you were sitting next to me one night and I was unruly and drunk, who would you expect to leave? Would you want to cut short your meal or would you ask the staff to escort me out? People need to realize its EVERYONE's vacation, and everone deserve to have a nice time, not just families. Disney restaurants are still PUBLIC PLACES and children and adults both should be expected to act accordingly.

I know I come across as anti-kid but I strongly believe that it is the parent's responsibility to realize if their children are effecting other people's dining. We were at the CG and saw an exasperated waiter finally have to tell a group of families to control their kids from running around the restaurant. There are so many restaurants on property that there is no need to drag an unhappy child to a Signature restaurant just because the parents are tired of chicken fingers.

Bring on the FLAMES!

The problem is how do you define rude? To some people even bringing children at all to these places is rude because at some point even the most subdued child might have a short outburst for whatever reason. I can remember being in a library once with my toddler. She fell down and was screaming and people where just glaring at me during those few minutes that I took trying to assess the damage. She had split her lip and blood was gushing out of her face and not one person offered to help they just stood there glaring, tsking and probably making judgments.. I'm sure they were all thinking "how rude of her to have a screaming child in a public library". I think that most of the people who are adamant about certain Disney restaurants being more for adults would probably not take the time to find out if a child shrieked out of pain or out of being an out-of-control brat.

 

[tlev]

The problem is how do you define rude? To some people even bringing children at all to these places is rude because at some point even the most subdued child might have a short outburst for whatever reason. I can remember being in a library once with my toddler. She fell down and was screaming and people where just glaring at me during those few minutes that I took trying to assess the damage. She had split her lip and blood was gushing out of her face and not one person offered to help they just stood there glaring, tsking and probably making judgments.. I'm sure they were all thinking "how rude of her to have a screaming child in a public library". I think that most of the people who are adamant about certain Disney restaurants being more for adults would probably not take the time to find out if a child shrieked out of pain or out of being an out-of-control brat.

I am certainly sympathetic to the occasional outburst from a young child. I am talking about prolonged bouts of misbehaving, children wandering around the restaurant to visit other tables, children playing on the floor, etc. However, I don't see why a parent with an unhappy child, whatever the reason, injury or otherwise, can not simply get up from the table and take their child out of the restaurant untill things calm down. There is no reason to try and soothe the child at a table next to other diners. This is just common courtesy to other people.

 

[chobie]

I am certainly sympathetic to the occasional outburst from a young child. I am talking about prolonged bouts of misbehaving, children wandering around the restaurant to visit other tables, children playing on the floor, etc. However, I don't see why a parent with an unhappy child, whatever the reason, injury or otherwise, can not simply get up from the table and take their child out of the restaurant untill things calm down. There is no reason to try and soothe the child at a table next to other diners. This is just common courtesy to other people.

In my situation, I wanted to stop the bleeding with a tissue before I ran her outside. I was more concerned with that, than her disrupting the sanctity of the public library.

One thing I try to teach my kids is that if they are unhappy about a situation they need to do something constructive to change it. Even if it is somebody else's fault that they are unhappy, only they can do something to change how they feel. If a thread was started that said "Let's start a petition to get more adult-only dining places at WDW" I would be in full agreement because that is doing something constructive to bring about a change in a situation that they find intolerable. Instead a flame suit was donned and the thread immediately became a "let's blame and shame some parents and brag about our own perfecting parenting skills". Whether that was the intent or not that is what happens. .

 

[Wee Annie]

I think that most of the people who are adamant about certain Disney restaurants being more for adults would probably not take the time to find out if a child shrieked out of pain or out of being an out-of-control brat


That's really not a fair statement. Let's keep things in perspective here. For some reason the people who have expressed a desire for parents not to totally ignore meltdowns have been labeled "Anti-kids." Please understand (and I feel that I speak for the vast majority of us) that we are just talking about basic consideration and civility, towards other people AND the children. Again, the vast majority of children whose parents take them to these restaurants will probable be well-behaved, and if they aren't, their parents will attend to them (i.e. try to figure out how to make them happier, which doesn't necessarily mean leaving the restaurant). I'm sure that no one who has posted here would, no matter what their feelings on the current topic, be as cold-hearted about your child when she fell down in the library as the people you described. And I give parents lots of leeway when a child has a meltdown (because I've been there). I know I'm repeating my former post, but all I ask is that, if the child has a meltdown in a nice restaurant, the parents not ingnore it.

 

[robinb]

I am sorry if I don't want my nice dinner with my wife disturbed by someone who feels that they need to teach their children to eat in nice places.

My suggestion to you would be to eat later in the evening when many of the younger children are already in bed. Honestly, if you're looking for a quiet, romantic dinner at WDW the only place you will find it is at Victoria and Albert's! Disney offers children's menus at almost all the other high end restaurants and encourages people to bring their kids to dinner. Those same people (myself included) wouldn't dream of going to such a fancy place with their kids at home.

I know I come across as anti-kid but I strongly believe that it is the parent's responsibility to realize if their children are effecting other people's dining.

You know, I don't think that a single person on this thread would disagree with you about a child who is totally out of control. However, I think that many people's expectations are far too high when they dine at a high-end WDW restaurant. They expect children to behave like ladies and gentlemen and then get all upset when a child cries, or has a melt down, or whatever children tend to do when they are tired. When I dine at a WDW restaurant I expect children to behave like children and I am often pleasantly surprised when they are little ladies and gentlemen.

 

[Wee Annie]

Okay, so I haven't really learned how to quote and reply yet. That first paragraph was a quote. Sorry.

 

[chobie]

Where was anyone called anti-kid by anyone else? I don't think people are anti-kid, I do think some people are intolerant and quick to pass judgments on parents though. The OP referred to it as "subjecting a a three year old to Jiko". Yes, of all the abuse in the world I can think of nothing worse than forcing a child to color on the kids menu while their parents enjoy a braised lamb shank.

 

[robinb]

Yes, of all the abuse in the world I can think of nothing worse than forcing a child to color on the kids menu while their parents enjoy a braised lamb shank.

 

[Wee Annie]

Somehow, I get the feeling that if I nurse in the restaurant to calm dd2, there would be lots of you on this thread who would not approve of that method either.

Speaking as someone who has expressed a desire for parents to try to manage inconsiderate behavior from children in a restaurant, I would wholeheartedly support your decision to nurse, if the baby needed to, in a restaurant. It's perfectly natural.

See, the problem arises when people try to stereotype others -- just because I expect parents to try to attend to their children when they're having an ourburst in a nice restaurant (or are running around the restaurant with abandon), doesn't mean that I'm some sort of conservative, uptight parent or child-hater (not that conservative is bad -- don't want to get people upset anew!)

Please, let's remember that, I believe, the OP was not attacking people who bring their children to Jiko, etc., just people who are oblivious to their childrens' and other people's feelings.

 

[momofpunkinboo]

I have no problems with well behaved children in a nice upscale "adult" oriented restaurant. If your children can handle the atmosphere, then that's fine. However, if your children love to crawl, run, and scream all over the place.....then take them to a more family oriented restaurant and not let them ruin other's expensive meals, wait until they are more mature, or find a sitter/children's club like Neverland.

I'm not even sure why this is even an issue. In my family, children who couldn't behave were not permitted to go to certain places like nice upscale restaurants.

Hallelujah!!! If my children can behave (and MOST of the time they can, though there is always the exception), they get to join us for a nice meal. If they can't, they suffer the consequence, as do I. That is part of being a parent. Children should be taught to behave in public places and not allowed to ruin ANY meal for ANYONE, at Disney World, at home, or on the moon, whether it is at McDonald's or Jiko, though I would expect it more at McDonald's. I am the parent of a past "tantrum" child and when she acted like that, she was promptly removed, so as not to ruin anyone else's meal. As a result, she now sits very nicely through a meal and I thoroughly enjoy her company (btw, she's four). I would prefer to take my children to dinner with us than leave them with a sitter or at a club, but that is my preference. Generally, I think most people would prefer to have a "settled" meal than one with a child screaming and carrying on. I am a daycare provider (for the past ten years) and I have a STRONG appreciation and adoration for children, but I also teach them manners. If they aren't taught manners, then we cannot expect them to behave. I am not blaming children, as they have to learn acceptable behavior somewhere, but rather the permissive parent who doesn't immediately correct the behavior. Ready and anxiously awaiting the FLAME!!

 

[Wee Annie]

Hey -- I've learned how to quote properly!

 

[Ariel Wanna-be]

I think it's cynical to label people who actually try to PARENT THEIR CHILDREN as "members of the Perfect Parent Patrol." Perfect? No. Parent? YES!

Snide remarks aside, it is just plain rude to allow your child to act like a wild heathen while you sit by and do nothing. This applies to people dining in Victoria & Alberts or their local Burger King. It's just. Plain. Rude.

 

[momofpunkinboo]

I think it's cynical to label people who actually try to PARENT THEIR CHILDREN as "members of the Perfect Parent Patrol." Perfect? No. Parent? YES!

Snide remarks aside, it is just plain rude to allow your child to act like a wild heathen while you sit by and do nothing. This applies to people dining in Victoria & Alberts or their local Burger King. It's just. Plain. Rude.

AMEN!!! My thoughts are very similar to yours!

 

[Wee Annie]

I, too, agree that "Perfect Parent Patrol" is a very snide remark. I think that MY remarks may be a bit defensive because I took that remark as a snide way to belittle anyone with an opposing viewpoint.

So sorry if my remarks are a bit defensive.

 

[Ariel Wanna-be]

Annie:

For the record, I saw nothing snide in your remarks.

Congrats on learning how to quote...now if only I could figure it out!

 

[chobie]

Okay, so does anyone want to weigh in on whether or not anything constructive can come out of a thread like this? People are feeling blamed, flamed, judged and condescended on, but none of that changes the fact that when one goes to WDW, one will see children just about everywhere.

 

[Wenlitz]

We have taken our kids who are now 12 and 18 to nice restaurants since they were babies. They have always been well behaved in public. They are not perfect by any means.
I personally dont like it when we are at any restaurant, disney world or else where and parents are letting there kids run around to other tables while they are eating there dinner or visiting with there tablemates. Just my opinion of course. Dont mean to ruffle any feathers!!

 

[robinb]

I, too, agree that "Perfect Parent Patrol" is a very snide remark.

If you're going to use it, then get it right. It's "Practically Perfect Parents". Snide? Maybe. But so are all the other judgmental generizations that people make when they talk about parenting. Every child is an individual and parenting is not one-size-fits-all. It's the PPP who think that their way is the only way to parent and that if you don't do things their way you are a bad parent. Or, at the very least misguided and in need of instruction.

I'm not a Perfect Parent and I don't play one on the DIS .

 

[chobie]

I think it's cynical to label people who actually try to PARENT THEIR CHILDREN as "members of the Perfect Parent Patrol." Perfect? No. Parent? YES!

Snide remarks aside, it is just plain rude to allow your child to act like a wild heathen while you sit by and do nothing. This applies to people dining in Victoria & Alberts or their local Burger King. It's just. Plain. Rude.

Name-calling and labeling, so much better than being snide.

 

[Ariel Wanna-be]

One-size-fits-all parenting? Where did that come from? I've seen no one state that "in order to get your child to behave, you must do XYZ."

In fact, everyone seems to be pointing out that kids are individuals, and parents should act accordingly.

If taking responsibility for my kids's behavior makes me a member of the (let me make sure I get this right) "Practically Perfect Parents" then bring on the membership benefits!! Is that all I have to do to be considered a perfect parent?! Whooo-hooo!