Ladies, sons and bathrooms

[cruisingtwins]

Tara, you just don't get it. Your arguments make no sense at all.

It makes sense to me

 

[Hikergirl]

I don't see how this is the same. A child (boy or girl) having to go in a crowded bathroom alone because they have a different gender adult with them is not the same as a teenage/preteen girl using a private stall next to someone who they can't see and can't see them. If menstruation is that uncomfortable for them, they might be better off using a private family bathroom. Respect the privacy of the person in the next stall, and their gender won't be an issue for you. Seriously if a girl is that uncomfortable with and embarrassed by what they are going through, they would be just as uncomfortable and embarrassed regardless of the gender of all the strangers around them.

That girl is allowed to have whatever issues she wants in the bathroom designated for her gender, she is not the one who should be seeking out a family restroom. The paranoid mothers of boys capable of taking care of their own bathroom needs are.

 

[Hikergirl]

It makes sense to me

I guess you don't get it either then. Its not about teaching girls anything, some girls just are uncomfortable. Its the woman;s restroom and their comfort comes before some mom scared to let her 8 year old son use the men's room, period. You either get that your you don't.

 

[MaryLovesPoohBear]

https://www.victimsofcrime.org/media/reporting-on-child-sexual-abuse/child-sexual-abuse-statistics

Ah, yes the man who said he will continue to do research until he "proves the child sexual abuse is widespread."

 

[aaarcher86]

It makes sense to me

That makes sense.

 

[aaarcher86]

I don't see how this is the same. A child (boy or girl) having to go in a crowded bathroom alone because they have a different gender adult with them is not the same as a teenage/preteen girl using a private stall next to someone who they can't see and can't see them. If menstruation is that uncomfortable for them, they might be better off using a private family bathroom. Respect the privacy of the person in the next stall, and their gender won't be an issue for you. Seriously if a girl is that uncomfortable with and embarrassed by what they are going through, they would be just as uncomfortable and embarrassed regardless of the gender of all the strangers around them.

No, right. Make the girl go somewhere private instead of the bathroom for girls. Totally makes sense.

And yes, they're probably uncomfortable in general, but at least they know the person next to them has the same issues.

It really doesn't matter if you think gender shouldn't be an issue. At WDW, the bathrooms are gender specific.

 

[BJ7644]

But I still fail to see how an 8 yo boy is a threat. Not all little boy look in the gaps. And if it happens it should be corrected rather than banning all boys.

And not all men peep in the men's room.

I fail to see how the men's room can be generalized as such a bad scary place because of what may happen there but we should disregard our daughters safety and comfort and only deal with a problem if and when it occurs?

 

[Tara1988]

Sexualizing what? If there's no reason for discomfort, why are schools not neutral gendered?

And my kids know there is a time and place for things. They know that locker rooms, bathrooms, etc there is a good chance that they may see someone's body. One is a swimmer and on competition dance, so she frequently sees strangers in various states of undress in an appropriate place - the GIRLS changing/locker/bathroom.

I can't picture what kind of outdoor venue you're talking about. Like a portapotty?

My son's school is. Each classroom has their own bathroom that all the students use. When the class had swim lessons, they all changed in private stalls of the same locker room, because being naked in front of anyone, regardless of gender, is not okay. I teach my children that it is not okay for anyone to see their private parts and it is not okay for them to look at anyone else's. Because when it comes to inappropriate behavior and sexual predators, being the same gender doesn't make it okay.

 

[Hikergirl]

And not all men peep in the men's room.

I fail to see how the men's room can be generalized as such a bad scary place because of what may happen there but we should disregard our daughters safety and comfort and only deal with a problem if and when it occurs?

Because they are just girls. They just have to be taught to not be uncomfortable and just accommodate a boys feelings because their own feelings just don't matter.
I think I'm going to tell my dd that when she dates a boy she has to ask him one very important question- did your mom make you use the ladies room when your were 8 or older. If the answer is yes, she better run far away from that one

 

[larryz]

Because the grand grand grand majority of predators arre men.

Maybe even pirates, arrr...

 

[Tara1988]

No, right. Make the girl go somewhere private instead of the bathroom for girls. Totally makes sense.

And yes, they're probably uncomfortable in general, but at least they know the person next to them has the same issues.

It really doesn't matter if you think gender shouldn't be an issue. At WDW, the bathrooms are gender specific.

An 8 year old boy and an 8 year old girl are equally clueless about what that girl is going through. So that is not a sufficient reason to say an 8 year old boy can't go into a bathroom with his mother. Maybe I let my children be children for too long, but I don't see the next 3 years making my 5 year old mature enough to walk around Disney world alone.

 

[cruisingtwins]

And not all men peep in the men's room.

I fail to see how the men's room can be generalized as such a bad scary place because of what may happen there but we should disregard our daughters safety and comfort and only deal with a problem if and when it occurs?

Because no one is at risk of an 8 year old sexualy assaulting you. If the gap thing is such an issue you can take the kid into a stall with you or put him in a stall by himself.

 

[maxiesmom]

I think the fact that the bathrooms are gender specific should be a huge indicator about who should be in them. If you want to ignore that little fact, then it is on you to make sure the people who actually belong in that restroom feel as comfortable as possible. They have the priority, not the other gender, no matter which way we are talking--female in male bathroom or male in female.

 

[Gracie09]

An 8 year old boy and an 8 year old girl are equally clueless about what that girl is going through. So that is not a sufficient reason to say an 8 year old boy can't go into a bathroom with his mother. Maybe I let my children be children for too long, but I don't see the next 3 years making my 5 year old mature enough to walk around Disney world alone.

My 6 year old girls know a bit about the female body and how it works. They know mommy uses special bandaids sometimes. Kids don't live in a bubble.

 

[BJ7644]

An 8 year old boy and an 8 year old girl are equally clueless about what that girl is going through. So that is not a sufficient reason to say an 8 year old boy can't go into a bathroom with his mother. Maybe I let my children be children for too long, but I don't see the next 3 years making my 5 year old mature enough to walk around Disney world alone.

Most of the women in my family hit puberty by 10. For me it was 8, menstruation and all. My 8yo male classmates certainty noticed my new growth.

 

[Gracie09]

Because no one is at risk of an 8 year old sexualy assaulting you. If the gap thing is such an issue you can take the kid into a stall with you or put him in a stall by himself.

children younger than 8 have been perpetrators of sexual abuse. I wouldn't worry about personally, but to say no one is at risk is not really true is it.

 

[mjkacmom]

I think many 8 year old of both genders know a thing or two about menstruation, if not raised in a bubble. These are third graders, for goodness sake. An 8 year old boy who wants to go in the ladies room with mommy has issues, although I've never met one. Overprotective helicopter moms - yep, they exist. Having b/g twins as my youngest, both would have been mortified if ds13 came into the ladies room at 8 (as they should be).

 

[robinb]

I don't see how this is the same. A child (boy or girl) having to go in a crowded bathroom alone because they have a different gender adult with them is not the same as a teenage/preteen girl using a private stall next to someone who they can't see and can't see them. If menstruation is that uncomfortable for them, they might be better off using a private family bathroom. Respect the privacy of the person in the next stall, and their gender won't be an issue for you. Seriously if a girl is that uncomfortable with and embarrassed by what they are going through, they would be just as uncomfortable and embarrassed regardless of the gender of all the strangers around them.

Wait.

So, the girl or woman who might feel uncomfortable changing a pad or tampon in a ladies' room with a boy standing in front of his mom's stall or at the sink waiting should be the one to find a companion bathroom? Really?

I think this thread officially jumped the shark .

 

[DisneyOma]

I don't see how this is the same. A child (boy or girl) having to go in a crowded bathroom alone because they have a different gender adult with them is not the same as a teenage/preteen girl using a private stall next to someone who they can't see and can't see them. If menstruation is that uncomfortable for them, they might be better off using a private family bathroom. Respect the privacy of the person in the next stall, and their gender won't be an issue for you. Seriously if a girl is that uncomfortable with and embarrassed by what they are going through, they would be just as uncomfortable and embarrassed regardless of the gender of all the strangers around them.

They can be seen, or haven't you been reading the posts? There are no 'private family bathrooms' at WDW, only companion bathrooms. The issue is that there is no guarantee the child will respect others' privacy, and in a bathroom labeled for females, a male who can handle the going to the bathroom part by himself does not need to be in the ladies' room.

An 8 year old boy and an 8 year old girl are equally clueless about what that girl is going through. So that is not a sufficient reason to say an 8 year old boy can't go into a bathroom with his mother. Maybe I let my children be children for too long, but I don't see the next 3 years making my 5 year old mature enough to walk around Disney world alone.

Not clueless in my family, or in any of the classrooms I've been in. You really think an 8 year old boy has no gender awareness?

 

[BJ7644]

Because no one is at risk of an 8 year old sexualy assaulting you. If the gap thing is such an issue you can take the kid into a stall with you or put him in a stall by himself.

It's not myself I'm concerned about. I don't give a hoot about a boy in the restroom while I'm there. This is about infringing on other GIRLS rights. I will never imply to my 4yo DD that she is safe because "he's only 8".

A quick google news search is showing me plenty of instances of 8yo boys committing sex crimes. I don't know how to link on here and don't know what good it would do anyway.

And my daughter still goes in a stall with me, I have no son. Not sure what that last part is supposed to mean?