Kids headed to College Fall 2012 Check-in

[cabanafrau]

This tread makes me depressed everytime I see it. All of my daughter's friends are getting ready to leave for college. My DD has decided not to attend. She graduated this spring with a 3.94 GPA and a 31 on the ACT. I loved college and I am sad she has decided that is not the path for her. It is a shame that we parents are not allowed to live their lives for them.

Aw, I feel for you. For some reason I have a hunch college is the path for her, particularly since you didn't mention some alternative path she's just got to pursue instead. Be sure you tell her she's got to have a plan, a solid plan, not just aimlessly searching. I hope you're able to report soon she's feeling she's missing out after talking w/ her friends and will at least hit community college 2nd semester & be ready to fly the coop for college next fall.

 

[Southernmiss]

So DS altar seved his last mass this morning with his 3 siblings before heading out next Friday.

I did well until the choir sang one of the hymns I used to sing to the kids as a lulaby--then all bets were off. Tears flowed, I had to leave and compose myself and have been choking up since.

He left right from church for work, but only after we managed to snap a few last pictures of him in his altar server robes.

 

[DVCLiz]

DD18 is having a blast! Her school does a three week freshman orientation including a seminar-style class. She liked the professor, who will be her faculty mentor until she chooses a major.

I've seen a couple of pictures on FaceBook - her view is beautiful and it looks like she found her first party without any trouble

Today is a field trip to the beach and then some study time. Hope I'll get a text or phone call later.

 

[WDWBarb]

So DS altar seved his last mass this morning with his 3 siblings before heading out next Friday.

I did well until the choir sang one of the hymns I used to sing to the kids as a lulaby--then all bets were off. Tears flowed, I had to leave and compose myself and have been choking up since.

He left right from church for work, but only after we managed to snap a few last pictures of him in his altar server robes.

Ohhhh... I feel for you. DD just came home for about 45 minutes (to grab a few things and hug the dogs). I swear I teared up just as much when she left this time and it's only been 2 nights!!

But she's having an awesome time. I love the stories of staying up all night and walking up and talking to total strangers and making new friends. She has a group of about 30 kids she's hanging out with. It's pretty awesome, actually, to see the results of your work as a parent. She's confident, kind (befriending as many kids as she can that seem to be homesick) and outgoing. I just never saw this side of her before.

So while I will always be her mom, I'm semi-retired as a parent. Well, except for 4 years of tuition bills!

I was surprised to learn yesterday during the parent/advisor meeting that they discourage students from working. DD loves her job and isn't going to give it up without a fight. They hadn't told her that there are mandatory evening/afternoon activities so her schedule will be both complicated and busy. But it's up to her to find balance. More life lessons.

And Empty Nest Day 3 isn't quite as bad as Day 1 or Day 2. So it will get better. I'm just waiting to find that "new normal."

 

[Buckalew11]

So far, things sound good for the DIS kids, huh? Yay!

However, DD's 2 trainer friends are miserable. Last night I spoke with DD and she said, "I'm going up to check on Lauren." I asked why and she said, "Mom, she and the other girl have bawled all day long. *sigh* So, I think I should go check."

Now DD is very compassionate but only to an extent--then, it is all "suck it up and move forward." I hate that the 2 friend she is working with are both so miserably unhappy.

And they are BUSY. So busy that DD had to miss a wedding last night that she was to attend as a group of trainers for one of the head trainers. They just did not finish in time to get showered, ready and drive to the wedding.

Now freshman orientation does not start for just shy of 2 more weeks so I think she's going to have a l-o-n-g 2 weeks if things do not shape up for these 2 girls. Maybe DH and I should invite them over to cook out or have a fire in the firepit and roast marshmallows or something...

I hate to see anyone homesick.

Last night I went to dinner with my sister and her kids and I asked 2 college aged kids if they were real homesick. "No!" I then asked if many of their friends seemed homesick. Again, they said no. Regardless, these 2 girls are very homesick and I feel for them. I just hope they are *trying* to help themselves and not sinking in the pity. And I'm afraid DD thinks that might be the case.

 

[wowsmom]

I've been ignoring this thread but just decided to read a few of the last pages. Big mistake! Need to go find some kleenex.....

My DH and DS will leave Tuesday morning to drive from L.A. to Seattle. I can't go along as my younger DS has band camp starting tomorrow. If he misses band camp, he's out of band, so not an option.

Thankfully, after much searching, asking and begging, I found a friend to take him in for a few days so I'm flying up Thursday for move-in day (Fri) and parent orientation (Fri/Sat) and will fly back home on Sunday.

I imagine the flight home will require many boxes of kleenex.

Family weekend is going to be a toughie - DH has his annual convention so he won't be able to go so I need to figure out if younger DS and I can go, or if he can stay with a friend and I'll just go.

Oh, here's a question for those with sons going off to college - do/did they take a bathrobe? The bathroom will be somewhere down the hall and my son is not the type to walk down the hall with a towel wrapped around him so we're trying to figure out what most kids do?

 

[wowsmom]

You all should appreciate this story, although if I read it I would think it was made up. I only know it to be true because the friend who told me about it knows first-hand and wouldn't make something like this up. Old friends of my friend live in CA and were getting ready to send their only child/DD off to college a couple years ago. Pwincess had adored their Hawaii vacations and was determined to attend college there, so of course that was her plan & they helped her reach her goal. Suddenly it dawned on them that there was a serious obstacle they had never even considered. Pwincess has never flushed a commode after a BM in her entire life because she is scared she will get doody on her. How can she attend college with an ocean between them if she cannot call them once duty has called her?

Pwincess commuted to college from home. As far as I know, mom and dad are "on call" to this day.

That's just mind-boggling!

I've been reading back a few more pages and the tears have stopped...I can do this!

 

[StephMK]

Well, it's over. DD is all moved in an tucked away at college (college? gosh, still just doesn't seem possible...).

I have to say that I am so PROUD of myself for not being a blubbering mess while we were on campus. I weeped a bit on the drive there, but she didn't notice.

DD did very well and only cried once - but I think anyone would because it was heartbreaking. The dogs lost their minds when we started carrying her stuff out to the car. The little one hasn't eaten a full meal since she started packing, but they both suddenly knew exactly what was going on. It was chaos - the barking, whining, running, trying to get out the door and into the car..

And then she went to hug them goodbye. The little guy grabbed her tightly around the neck and started making the most mournful squealing noise. She had to pry him off her neck. He was shaking so hard and kept trying to get back to her .... we had to put him in a kennel so she could leave.

But once on campus, everything was so much better. It was fun moving her in and seeing the excitement on these kid's faces. This was one of the MOST EXCITING days of their lives and it was nearly impossible to be sad.

She loves her room, the view, just about everything.

So I left her at 2 o'clock, when she "suggested" that I could go home anytime I wanted. And it wasn't until 6:30 that we did our first Facetime. And she started it!

But I kept my tears in until I got home. Her stuff isn't here. The house seems so sad. So I mowed the lawn. And I'll try to find other stuff to do to fill the time and the void. And I'll dream about the days when she was young and we had forever. And she called me her best friend. And she told me we'd never, ever be apart.

Ugh. Sorry. I keep doing that.

Congrats! I love that she started the first talk! How has the first weekend been?

At this point, I'm ready for DD to go so I can stop thinking about it & just DO it already. I have been breaking into tears at odd times all weekend!

 

[StephMK]

So DS altar seved his last mass this morning with his 3 siblings before heading out next Friday.

I did well until the choir sang one of the hymns I used to sing to the kids as a lulaby--then all bets were off. Tears flowed, I had to leave and compose myself and have been choking up since.

He left right from church for work, but only after we managed to snap a few last pictures of him in his altar server robes.

Ugh, DD's last solo at church got to me too! Enjoy the last week!

DD18 is having a blast! Her school does a three week freshman orientation including a seminar-style class. She liked the professor, who will be her faculty mentor until she chooses a major.

I've seen a couple of pictures on FaceBook - her view is beautiful and it looks like she found her first party without any trouble

Today is a field trip to the beach and then some study time. Hope I'll get a text or phone call later.

Fun! Glad to hear she's enjoying it! I love that the freshmen get to bond before everyone shows up. LOL on the party, sometimes I'm glad FB wasn't around when I was in school!

So far, things sound good for the DIS kids, huh? Yay!

However, DD's 2 trainer friends are miserable. Last night I spoke with DD and she said, "I'm going up to check on Lauren." I asked why and she said, "Mom, she and the other girl have bawled all day long. *sigh* So, I think I should go check."

Now DD is very compassionate but only to an extent--then, it is all "suck it up and move forward." I hate that the 2 friend she is working with are both so miserably unhappy.

And they are BUSY. So busy that DD had to miss a wedding last night that she was to attend as a group of trainers for one of the head trainers. They just did not finish in time to get showered, ready and drive to the wedding.

Regardless, these 2 girls are very homesick and I feel for them. I just hope they are *trying* to help themselves and not sinking in the pity. And I'm afraid DD thinks that might be the case.

Aw, that must be tough for your DD. Keeping them busy will probably be a good thing. Hope they are able to get past it so your DD can enjoy the experience w/them.

 

[StephMK]

DD & I made a last trip yesterday to get school supplies & I think she's ready. I got teary in Walmart & cried on the way home - she even teared up very briefly. The whole family laughs at my waterworks. She was my first & I was a single mom til I married DH when she was 4.5 so we are very close.

I'm not worried about her & know she will have a good time, I just can't get past the fact that the growing up years are basically done. She is off saying goodbye her close friends now & will see 2 more after dinner tonight.

Ugh. It would be easier if she were more difficult to live with, she's always been a pretty easy kid. Now her younger sister is another story! I may be dancing and throwing a party by then - she is entering the ultra-moody phase of 13 and already driving me nuts.


DD is rushing - mainly because her roomies & some others she knows are too and they can all move in early. They will go in groups based on their floors so hopefully it will be a good way to meet some girls. She is not taking a bathrobe, not sure what she plans to do but didn't want one.

 

[zurgswife]

We finally went out and purchased some supplies!!!! 14 days and counting...

 

[wowsmom]

I'm not worried about her & know she will have a good time, I just can't get past the fact that the growing up years are basically done.

This

Ugh. It would be easier if she were more difficult to live with, she's always been a pretty easy kid.

And this

She is not taking a bathrobe, not sure what she plans to do but didn't want one.

We're still kind of up in the air...appreciate your letting me know what you're doing. I just know what he does at home isn't going to work in the dorms.

He's not wanting to take shower shoes either - he's not a flipflop/slide wearing kind of guy - but we are definitely sending those. Don't wanna have to send medicine or $ for athlete's foot so hopefully he'll get used to them!

 

[Southernmiss]

We have one more Walmart or Target run to do.

We both work Monday to Wednesday, so Thursday it will be. He also has decided he needs a few dress clothes so it will be an early morning on Thursday to get his Walmart/Target stuff and then do some clothes shopping before DD10 is out of school at 2 p.m..

He'll pack Thurday and load the van so we can take off at 6:30 Friday morning--his school is an hour away and his move in time is from 8 to 10 a.m.

He hasn't worn a robe in years. I see lots of boxers and feel like I live in a frat house all the time. His dorm room has a bathroom that he only shares with his roommate. So no advice on the bath robe question.

Glad to have so many on this board who are going through the same thing.

 

[mom2boys]

This morning, oldest DS headed out on his 2300 mile solo trek to his first year of college. The family went to breakfast & I had a huge lump in my throat & tears in my eyes as we followed him out of the parking lot. Then 17 yr old DS asked to stop at the Walmart for a new backpack. I was ok because I needed to think about what we needed from Walmart. I would have been a mess if we had followed DS down the highway for 5 miles until he turned West and we turned East. He texted his brother earlier and is almost to his first night's stop.

I'm going to be a basket case. We have been so focused on getting him and the truck ready for the big move. Now he's gone. He has to check in a week early due to marching band. Good thing, because I walked into his room and found his graphing calculator on his desk. He's going to need that for his math class this semester. Guess I'll start building his first care package.

 

[Boston Tea Party]

Less than a week to go here. She is out most of the time so it is like she has already gone in some ways.

I am kicking myself for not planning to go with her to help her move in.

 

[Buckalew11]

This morning, oldest DS headed out on his 2300 mile solo trek to his first year of college. The family went to breakfast & I had a huge lump in my throat & tears in my eyes as we followed him out of the parking lot. Then 17 yr old DS asked to stop at the Walmart for a new backpack. I was ok because I needed to think about what we needed from Walmart. I would have been a mess if we had followed DS down the highway for 5 miles until he turned West and we turned East. He texted his brother earlier and is almost to his first night's stop.

I'm going to be a basket case. We have been so focused on getting him and the truck ready for the big move. Now he's gone. He has to check in a week early due to marching band. Good thing, because I walked into his room and found his graphing calculator on his desk. He's going to need that for his math class this semester. Guess I'll start building his first care package.

Less than a week to go here. She is out most of the time so it is like she has already gone in some ways.

I am kicking myself for not planning to go with her to help her move in.

Hugs to you both!

I am sure it is a bit of a worry having a child driving that far to school.

BTP, Will you be able to visit during Family weekend? It is hard to teach and take any time off--esp. the beginning and endings of the years.

 

[Boston Tea Party]

BTP, Will you be able to visit during Family weekend? It is hard to teach and take any time off--esp. the beginning and endings of the years.

Can't afford to. It would make our fourth trip to California in one year. I am telling myself I did my job and did it well: she was accepted on scholarship to a highly selective university and is excited about being independent.

But I still feel...

We need to focus on the younger one. He had a hard time in 5th grade last year. Middle school is going to be a big adjustment.

 

[Buckalew11]

Can't afford to. It would make our fourth trip to California in one year. I am telling myself I did my job and did it well: she was accepted on scholarship to a highly selective university and is excited about being independent.

But I still feel...

We need to focus on the younger one. He had a hard time in 5th grade last year. Middle school is going to be a big adjustment.

And it does sound like you all did a great job. I doubt she would have applied there if she did not think she could go that far away! The girl we know who is going to Cali is also well prepared and ready.

I had not thought of those travel costs! You are right!

I hope your younger one adjusts to being an "only." Some kids like it and others, not so much. I had two older sisters and was devastated when the middle one left me. However, I liked it being just the "3 of us." I think it had a lot to do with our decision to only have one.

Good news for the 2 homesick girls today. DD thought today was a much better day for them.

And...DD ran home for a few minutes! Happy parents and puppies!

 

[Green Tea]

Lots of washing clothes and sorting gathered piles here. Mostly me....kids not so interested.

A reminder for those whose children have cars but are not taking them to school.....notify your insurance agent for an away at college without a car endorsement. If they are 100 miles or more away, there is a discount to insurance applied for the term.

 

[SC Minnie]

DD leaves in less than a week. She isn't working this week and supposed to be going through everything and double checking that she has what she needs. No tears shed here. I feel like a bad mom with everyone else crying. She will be 3 hours away and we'll see her in 2 weeks when we go down there for a vacation (we had already planned before she decided to go to this school).