Kids Cell Phone - What age/why?

[emma'smom]

We got our dd a phone when she was 9 and in the 4th grade. It's a simple track phone with old fashion texting. However, they would sometimes dismiss swim practice early and she would be stuck waiting---or the same for soccer. So now she can let us know and when her grandparents pick her up they don't have to park and go into the pool (which isn't easy for my elderly mother)---they can just text her to come out.

 

[Bonniec]

I agree that it's social suicide to not have one. I'm sensitive to that because my parents never understood those things (Parents Just Don't Understand song now playing in my head).

Our twins got their first phones at age 9. I ended up liking it because we could get a hold of them. We went through various types of phones throughout the years. I think they were about 15 or 16 when they got their first iphones.

Plus, it was a handy little discipline tool whenever they acted up. There is nothing more "horrendously cruel" than having your iphone taken away.

Grounded from going out = not much effect
Grounded from texting = "OMGZ my life sux I have the meanest parents ever!!!"

 

[Order66]

In 5th grade, so they were 11. I told my kids they could get a phone when they were old enough to be somewhere without a parent (or other adult) who had a cellphone. Oh, they did complain they were the "ONLY" ones in class without phones. And it's true around here that is about the age/grade level where kids who don't have a phone really are left out of a lot of stuff because that's all the kids do is text each other.

We still have a land line because we're just old and are used to it. I don't like the cell reception in my house either. I like my kids to have the phones, even though they don't really use them constantly (yet!). That way I can contact them whenever I need to or if they have a need to call me. If sports practice gets out early or late....or they're at a friends house and I want them to come home, or when you have to talk to your friend over PS3 with your mic AND your phone! LOL They were also great on vacation for when we split up here and there.

My kids started out with basic messaging phones. I have ATT so I got them prepaid service with the same. So when I call them, it's free for me. We do the $2 a day plan because they don't use them every day, but when they do they can call and text 1,000,000 times in that day if they want. They also have a $25 a month plan that's unlimited text and 250 minutes a month that I'll probably switch to when they become more teen like and glue themselves to their phones. Prepaid was the cheaper way and assured me I'd never get a huge surprise phone bill. They spend the money on the phone, the phone would sit until refill time. Only 1 child ran out of money and only once in 2 years.

Their newest complaint is they were the "ONLY" ones without smartphones, so I upgraded them. I bought them each an android off ebay for what I considered reasonable (under $75.00) but they are limited to wi-fi use only. I told them that there is no real "NEED" to have you-tube access 24/7 and I won't pay for data plans for either of them. I only carry the cheapest plan for myself. But they can have the apps, music, video, etc.... with wi-fi in lots of places. When they turn 16 and get jobs they can pay for all the data they want.

regards

 

[dawnball]

I told my kids they could get a phone when they were old enough to be somewhere without a parent (or other adult) who had a cellphone.

Yup. Pretty much. DD is 8, and that's why she has a cell phone (feature phone) to use. She has demo team for her martial arts program on Saturdays, and it tends to run over time, but is very close to home. She'll call when she's ready to come home, and someone will walk out to meet her.

She doesn't need to carry it anywhere else, so when she gets home the cell phone goes back on the charger where it's always kept as the "house" cell. Over time, I expect she'll carry it more and more often for our convenience.

 

[jackie101]

My DD is 12 and is such a home body. She has wanted a cell phone for yrs. We might cave for Christmas. Just trying to find the least expensive plan. We use straight talk thru walmart, so the option of adding her is not there. Would not like to pay more than $20 for unlimited text/talk if possible.

 

[mistysue]

My daughter is 9. I got her a phone about a month ago- it was suggested by the secretary at her school. Funny thing, the secretary told me almost every kid in the school has one, but the day she left it on in her bag by accident the teacher told me that if it happened again she would take the phone away and that she wouldn't feel bad because she was the only kid in the class with a phone. I giggled to myself about that one- I do know for a fact that she is personal friends with the parents of kids in that class who I KNOW have phones.

Anyways, she has it because we don't have a land line and sometimes I leave for work while she is waiting for the bus. One time the bus came up and was telling parents on the spot that one of the three elementary schools was closed... that would be a bad combo if she had no phone.

 

[KristiKat]

Great thread! My DH and I will be facing this decision on whether we should get his son a phone or not soon. He will be 12 in Feb. Lucky for us he hasn't asked for one yet but we know it's only a matter of time. My DH is against it and I'm just not sure to be honest one way or the other. I don't think he's responsible enough to keep up with it. I've enjoyed reading everyone's posts on how, when, and why you made your decisions. Hopefully it will help when our time comes. Funny to think about it. How in the world did we ever survive when we were young? We didn't have cell phones and yet we managed to navigate through life and it's ups and downs and emergencies just fine. Kids are very spoiled now compared to how we grew up. It amazes me all the things kids (including mine) have now compared to what we grew up with.

 

[bellebud]

My dd13 and ds11 have had their cell phones for a few years now. They started when they were pretty young, 'just because', and the phones were used as phones and not used very much even for that.

Now with smartphones, it's about so much more than it being a phone.

The girls do not call each other, they text. As another poster said, kids can/will be left out if an invite cannot be texted to them.

I notice my ds and his friends call each other more than text, but they're not gabbing on the phone the way girls do (used to)... it's just "you're home? come over". And no one calls on the house phone anymore. It's just different than when we were kids.

I honestly love my kids having the latest technology and knowing how to use it, and use it well. I look at it as an investment in their future, not as a phone.

Especially for my ds, who uses his iphone as a 'phone' maybe 5% of the time, but uses it as a computer, learning device, gaming device, camera, music player, etc, the other 95% of the time. It has sparked an interest in technology for him that I don't think would have happened otherwise.

 

[sk!mom]

Funny to think about it. How in the world did we ever survive when we were young? We didn't have cell phones and yet we managed to navigate through life and it's ups and downs and emergencies just fine. Kids are very spoiled now compared to how we grew up. It amazes me all the things kids (including mine) have now compared to what we grew up with.

I always find this argument amusing. How did people get along without electricity, cars, microwave ovens, and tons of other things that we consider necessities now. Before something exists, we manage. Once it does exist most of us welcome the convenience.

As for the original question, DD16 was 10. We did away with our landline once we all had cells. I love being able to always be in touch. Before she was driving, it was so nice that she could text when she was ready for a ride rather than me always just sitting in the car and waiting for rehearsals and such to end.

 

[nansmama]

My kids are 14 and 16 (nearly 15 and 17). Until ten months ago, we lived in a place that got no cell reception. I don't mean our house, I mean pretty much the entire town. Yes, places like that still exist! I did get them cell phones a few years ago, but obviously they were bricks 95% of the time. So, when my kids were out of my sight, they were also out of contact. Strangely, we all survived this trauma.

My kids can use their cell phones now, but just... don't. My daughter dances six days a week, and forgets to bring it with her half the time because she wasn't used to being able to use it. Also, her main dance studio is in the still-receptionless black hole town, so she can't even use the cell phone from there anyway.

I think 12 is a good age to get a cell phone. I don't think they are necessary items, unless your kid is in some truly unique circumstance on a regular basis.

ETA: All my dd's friends (in the 13-16 range) are "over" texting. They are all addicted to Tumblr and Skype now. I've been informed these are the new best ways to talk. The only time they text is when they can't get to a computer.

 

[rentayenta]

My 12YO son has been asking for a cell phone, saying that all of his friends have one. I cannot think of a single reason to get him one... we have a land line for his friends to call him on. He doesn't roam freely around town. When he's not at home, I always know where he is. If he's at a friend's house or the pool or library or YMCA, there's a phone there he can use.

I'm curious when people get them for their kids and why.

Did you drop the landline at home and go all cellular?
Are the kids on their own after school and you like to check-up on them?
Are they driving age and you wanted to track them?
No reason, you just wanted to?

Are they basic phones for calling and texting or full data plans?

No landline.
Kids don't roam free but we don't helicopter them either.
Not driving but will be in 6 months.
10 years old when they get them.
Full data.
Coaches text them, friends text them, I text them.

 

[mitchwebb]

girls all get phones in 8th grade different ages depending on kids. I am now thinking of caving to 6th grader and getting one in 7th grade , she is never home. We also have At&t and have 9pm cut off and a 7am turn on for the phone. After having first daughter on the phone until 2am in the morning with drama calls from friends we decided it was a better call to just not make her the bad guy not calling back friends, she was fine with this

must say my 6th grader uses my cell phone at home more then I do. all her friends seen to have phones and contact is for cell phone only.

 

[pigletto]

Reading this thread it really seems to vary with the area. 5th grade seems really young compared to average age here. My dd got her cell phone later than maybe half of her friends, but I still think it was 7th grade before more than a handful of kids had them.

Ds will likely be the same. I don't let him roam around here. He has to have a purpose and a place to where he is going.. i.e. "Billy's house until 6pm" so it will be awhile before he needs one. He plays a ton of sports but my husband coaches most of them. So he'll be 12 in the end of the 6th grade. I am thinking around his 12th birthday. We'll see.

 

[luvthemouse71]

I told my daughter she could have one when she starts turning off lights and stops using using a whole roll of toilet paper each time she pees. that should cover the cost.

Lol!!

 

[mrodgers]

Whoop, there it is.

Yup, because more than likely it is. Original post stated "we have a land line for his friends to call him on." Not going to work in this day and age. A land line can't text. While everyone else has cell phones and are texting each other, one kid sits at home listening to a quiet phone because no one texts these days.

My oldest (just turned 12) got one because I work daylight. My wife works afternoon/evenings. If she happens to get scheduled earlier than they get home and I end up having to stay a little later at work, we can contact her on the bus and let her know that no one is home.

Next year the then 10 year old will get one because our older daughter will be starting Jr. high school, thus will be on a different bus.

 

[brymolmom]

DS10 (5th grade) and dd9(4th grade) do not have one yet. And for the phone it'll likely be a couple of years.

However, I am seriously considering an ipod Touch so that they can text.

I consider this a happy medium. They can text their friends when they're at home...but won't be attached to it night and day because it won't have any connection out of the house (or other wifi setup).

I don't think a phone is a need at this point. Yes, they have some after school activities - but there are teachers, leaders, coaches at each of them. So if they needed to contact me - they could do so.

It will be a long time before they get a phone WITH a data plan that I'm willing to pay for....I don't even have one for myself! And I survive fine - text my friends on my phone and check facebook (and Disboards) when I'm at home from my laptop.

 

[POPCITY]

DS got my old flip phone when he was maybe 5 or 6, when I got my first iPhone. Since then, whenever I upgrade, he gets my old iPhone. He's 11 now, 6th grade, and has had my old iPhone 4 since last month. He has one for the same reason I do, because he wants one! People lived without cell phones 20 years ago, so I don't necessarily consider them a necessity for anyone, but they are one heckuva convenience. And yes, he has the full data package.

 

[angierae]

In some areas it IS social suicide not to have a phone. Heck, DH and *I* text our friends 90% of the time. DD17, DH, me and my MIL are on a shared plan with 700 minutes and we never come CLOSE to that.

This may not be true everywhere, but it's definitely true around here. DD got an invite to go to Cedar Point this summer and it was via text and she slept thorugh it, and missed out. It never occurred to her friend to CALL. They just don't.

 

[THERESA522]

I bought a tracfone for my kids (they're 8 & 10) from amazon for $13. You get double minutes for life of the phone and there's no chance of them going over the allotted time. I like the security of them being able to call me whenever they need to. That is the #1 reason why I bought them.

 

[LeahA]

We got our oldest son one when he was 12 at Christmas. We will be getting our 2nd child one this Christmas, he is also 12. Our oldest really wanted one, our 2nd child we feel needs one. He doesn't get to roam around and do whatever he wants, but, he does go to the local park with friends, goes to the movies with his friend and his friends family. I like to know that I can get a hold of him. I have all his friends cell numbers in my phone, but sometimes they don't answer when I call. Nothing fancy, no I phone or anything, just something basic to start with.