Kids and Christmas lists, ever NOT get the items?

[MrsPete]

that Santa will not bring items that DH and I do not approve of.

As a general rule of thumb, I agree wholeheartedly . . . but I did break that rule once, and it worked out well: When my kids were younger, they were enthralled with the idea of Baby Bottle Pops. I wouldn't buy them because they make a huge mess and were overpriced. They never actally put these candies on their Christmas lists, but one year I bought them each a couple for their stockings.

It just happened to be THE YEAR that my oldest started to question whether Santa was real, and when she saw those Baby Bottle Pops, she was SURE. She announced to us all that she KNEW Santa was real because Mom never would've bought those candies!

It was great. I got another year or two of belief out of her!

 

[MrsPete]

Yes, but remember that I never celebrated Christmas and was raised in a different fashion; i.e., we did not believe that Christmas was Jesus' b-day (I could go on forever on what we did believe, but I've tried hard to forget). I also did not celebrate my b-day, nor did we hardly recognize it. Not saying it's right, just saying to each their own.

Sure, there are many reasons why people do/don't celebrate Christmas -- some in favor of other religions, some for secular reasons, some because of parental lack of interest or simply lack of money.

But in our family, we try to keep the focus on Jesus' birthday. We try to keep the modern idea of Christmas as a time for giving or a time for family secondary. Your family may well have different ideas, which is fine.

This is pretty much us as well. The lists are usually pretty reasonable and the kids know they are "suggestions" not "must haves". That being said I can guarantee they have never been let down on Christmas. They love the things that are surprises.

Yeah, once they see the things they actually get, the list items that didn't "make the cut" are forgotten.

 

[mrsbornkuntry]

My kids make their lists with the expectation that they won't get everything on the list. It's not a shopping list, it's a wishlist. What fun would unwrapping gifts be if you knew what everything was going to be?

If I can I get them the things they really, really want on the list, then fill in with things that go along with that or other things I think they will like. For example, this year my 11yo has asked for an itouch, an ihome, and some video games. He is getting the itouch and ihome and a couple of the games, but not all of them. Since the games he asked for were really cheap ones (they were really old so he expected them to be used) I also got him some camping supplies I know he would like to have for scouts.

My 6yo is getting the things he really wanted like a bike and a pillow pet, he will not be getting a dirt bike. I already told him that, I said "Santa knows that it's not a good idea, you aren't old enough for one and we don't have anyplace for you to ride it." And the kids all know that Santa doesn't bring inappropriate video games or other toys that I don't approve of.

 

[StephMK]

Nope, I have never gotten them everything on their list. It's a wish list & I usually ask them to star their top 3 wishes. I try to get at least 2 of those but they never think about some ideas that I give them because they aren't the commercialized items.

DS knows he is not getting a touch because he received a DSi last year & it's been lost in the house more than used. He also asked for the SnapCircuits car set & that is his big item. If I went by his list, it would be all wii & DS games. Instead he is getting one of each plus the HP Lego game, a chemistry set & book of biology experiments along with some other things.

DD10 has been asking for a camera for the last year so that is going to be her "big" gift this year with accessories. She asked for an EZ Bake oven, Blizzard Maker & Dots maker. They are all junky toys so I might get one or get some cooking things for her that work better. She did not ask for but is getting a book on cartooning because she loves to draw them.

DD16 is getting the clothes she wants but also some stuff she hasn't asked for as well.

I like to get them some things they have asked for but add in some surprises too.

 

[StephMK]

Other things go against my own ideas of right and wrong. For example, I am not putting TVs in kids' bedrooms (don't care if I'm the last parent on the planet who feels this way).

In most cases, I do try to make those #1 and #2 gifts EXACTLY the item they're hoping for. .

ROFL! That stuck out at me because my kids swear they are the last kids without personal TV. I won't do it either and they all know it.

I did relent slightly because DD16 does have a computer in her room but she knows we have full access, check when we need to & I can pull the internet if she ever abuses it. If she didn't have excellent grades & a hectic schedule, she wouldn't have it available though.

I bought 2 cameras - returning one - just so I could get DD10 the exact one I didn't realize she wanted. She'd never picked a fav, just a blue one, until she pointed one out in the store. It was in the budget so I hope she'll be excited to see it!

 

[ilovejack02]

DS8 asked for everything in the Lego catalog except the Duplo items.

So no, he isn't getting everything on his Santa list. ; )

He learned early on Santa and Mom discuss all lists before anything is given , both of us have to agree on the gifts.


He is getting 4 of the smaller Harry Potter lego sets , a few books, and set of four kung zhu hamsters with accessories and stocking stuffers

Mom and Dad are bringing the IPOD Touch. He didn't ask for it, but most of his friends are getting one , so he will ask before long lol . I am tired of keeping up with his DS games so this is a win win for both of us . We travel quite bit and keeping up with just the Touch will make things so much easier.

 

[MrsPete]

ROFL! That stuck out at me because my kids swear they are the last kids without personal TV. I won't do it either and they all know it.

I did relent slightly because DD16 does have a computer in her room but she knows we have full access, check when we need to & I can pull the internet if she ever abuses it. If she didn't have excellent grades & a hectic schedule, she wouldn't have it available though.

I bought 2 cameras - returning one - just so I could get DD10 the exact one I didn't realize she wanted. She'd never picked a fav, just a blue one, until she pointed one out in the store. It was in the budget so I hope she'll be excited to see it!

Well, then, it's your kids and my kids vs. the whole rest of the world! Or at least they think so. I threw that in because it was an example of something I just wouldn't buy for my kids -- so if it were on their list, it'd be an automatic "no".

In the spirit of full disclosure, I don't have a TV in my bedroom either.

 

[jennilouwho]

My oldest DS is 4. I won't let him make a list, but we have talked about what he wants for Christmas and he has mentioned several things. The thing he has talked about the most Santa will bring. I am purposely not getting him some of the other items to teach him that you don't always get what you want and I know he'll be just as happy Christmas morning. We are trying very hard to focus on what he's going to GIVE for Christmas and about what family activities we are going to do. I agree with those that saying family time is much more important than the gifts. The only thing I remember about Christmas as a kid was that I would go to my since passed on Grandma and Grandpa's house and they'd play games with me after dinner before we exchanged gifts. I couldn't tell you one gift I received.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

In the beginning...

I only let them ask for one or two things. I didn't want a shopping list that would make Santa sweat.

In any case--they have come to expect that they will get somethings on their list....

And what we do--they ask for 20 (or whatever) and I have them star the MOST important things keeping in mind that we have a budget.

I think it is MAGICAL to get them a request they had--my mom had always finished shopping by the time I got to my list, so for years I didn't get what I asked for...until I started giving her my list much earlier.

I have fun by trying to surprise them with something special. The list isn't intended to be a "grocery list" of stuff I am supposed to buy. I'll never buy everything on it. If they ask for too little, I make them ask for more--and then buy less. I'm mean like that.

I also don't want them to have unrealistic expectations that I am some magical genie granting wishes just b/c. I mean--at some point the budget is going to break if I catered to every whim. Even the genie only granted three wishes.

Things requested that are delayed (or nixed completely) until future years....
additional pets, laptop computers, ipods (just b/c they'll lose these...nothing against them--decent gift, but they need to be more responsible), cell phones...etc.


They also have a budget for requests....and they keep their must haves to within that budget. This year, they didn't even ask, they remembered last years limited budget (due to husband's layoff and then a major transition that took him out of state for work) and then kept to that.

 

[neatokimmo]

I bought everything on the list except for:
-a purse like mamas. I think she wanted a mini hipster in the same pattern as my hipster. We spent some time on the Vera Bradley site picking out my mom's stuff.
- a pair of glasses because luckily she doesn't need them
- a Hello Kitty video game. I didn't see one for the vsmile and she isn't getting a leapster until her birthday. Not even sure they make one.

Really the purse price was fine, I just would have gotten a lot of grief over it from other Mom's I know.

I bought enough stuff for 5 kids this year and enjoyed every minute of it. That will prob bite me in the rear next year.

 

[SplashMo]

For us Santa brings one gift. It goes unwrapped under the tree. We are clear that there are some things Santa will not bring (Donkeys, horses, etc...). When DD or DS want something big / dangerous we always warn them that Santa doesn't bring everything. This is usually enough for thenm to ask for something else...

Then the rest of the list is just suggestions...

 

[SILLYANDI]

Does your child have parents that love him, food on the table and clothes to wear? If so, he is well ahead of most of the kids in this world, so I would say you are not bad parents. Perspective has taught me that the fact that there are ANY presents to be opened Christmas morning is way more than most kids can hope for!

I wholeheartedly agree. And I'd like to add that kids are much more resilient then we give them credit for. I think learning to deal with disappointment will be a better gift to my kids then never letting them feel it by buying everything on the list. Not that I intentionally don't buy what they want to hurt them, but I stay in our budget, I buy what I feel is appropriate and if it happens to be on their list then that is a bonus.
I, too, hate to see my kids sad or disappointed, but I also have faith in their ability to get over it.

 

[SILLYANDI]

Well, then, it's your kids and my kids vs. the whole rest of the world! Or at least they think so. I threw that in because it was an example of something I just wouldn't buy for my kids -- so if it were on their list, it'd be an automatic "no".

In the spirit of full disclosure, I don't have a TV in my bedroom either.

There are four other kids sitting TV-less in this world because mine don't have them in their rooms either. I just don't see any reason for a TV in a BEDroom. Not even my own. BEDrooms are for sleeping- TV rooms are for watching TV?! lol

 

[Ericandjenng]

We love doing the whole Santa thing. My DS came home early in the school year and said that someone had told him that Santa wasn't real. I asked him what did he think. For now, he still believes but we also explained that Santa can only bring him one big or expensive present because there are so many other kids that Santa has to deliver to also.

I also have some really great friends who act as Santa. My BFF (who is also a fellow DISer) plays "written" Santa. I send her the letters and she writes back as Santa. A co-worker is "phone" Santa. Last year DS decided that he hadn't specified which train set he wanted after he had sent his letter. We "called" Santa and he explained which one he wanted. We also explain that the Mall Santas are really Santa's helpers because he can't be out and about this close to Christmas because he is at the North Pole finishing all the toys and gifts.

Don't forget the Reindeer food outside when you put the cookies out for Santa!! (Dry Oats mixed with red/green glitter).

MERRY CHRISTMAS!! (and only 15 shopping days left---)

 

[indimom]

Growing up I stopped making lists because Santa never bought off it anyway! My mother is the WORST gift giver. I would get underwear and socks from "santa" every year. I always wondered why my friends got cool gifts and i got well not so cool.

when we had our first DD my DH was shocked at how little I did for her for Christmas! She was only 6 months so I got her a book and a couple toys. Fast forward a few years and we would discuss gifts. I also was because he is normally very grumpy but insisted the kids have good Christmas' now to me we go BIG but to everyone else we are still budget related. I still scour for deals. I buy and DH always says "do more"! I could not believe the first year he sent me for DS Lites for BOTH kids. since then we kept up. DD is 10 and DS is 8.

However we don't buy everything on the lists. This year for DS we are buying very LITTLE on his list and I feel heartbroken. He is an excellent child, does well in school, excels in sports, does chores and is such a sweet child. His major requests for Santa are an iPod Touch or a PSP in blue.

Now, he has a DSi. We have a wii and DH has a PSP he bought for son but said it was DH's so DS didn't take it to daycare. We also have a PS3. DS has an iPod shuffle and an MP3 player (no screen or touch or video). We are getting them one netbook to share.

DH said "NO" on the iPod touch. His reasoning is DS has all the other electronics and does not need the touch. He said he would think about a nano but no on the touch. He said no way on another PSP. Thing is, I agree. But I feel so bad because DS has his little heart set on a iPod touch. I told him this morning I doubted Santa would bring the iPod or the PSP because he has one. He teared up a bit and said "but mom, I'm a good boy".

So are we bad parents or do you also not buy things on their lists??

He is getting Harry Potter hogwarts lego castle as his big gift, along with the netbook to be shared. He is getting several other smaller things too.

I just want to hear from others that do not buy up the whole wish list.[/QUOTE]

Frequently.

When they were younger, they were too timid to sit on Santa's lap and we never made lists, so I would just wing it based on what I knew they liked.
As they hit grade school, they usually did a letter to Santa as a class assignment. They never really looked at it as a serious letter though and I just bought what I knew they liked. Sometimes it was on the list, sometimes it wasn't. So, I guess, we avoided this problem sort of by accident in prior years.

Now this year has been a bit of an issue, because the things they like get more expensive each year. My son (10) really wants a guitar, and has CRAVED a new game system the entire year and has been saving like a madman to buy one himself.
I spent a lot of time debating both of these items. I feel like he should take lessons using his dad's guitar first before we decide to make that kind of financial investment in something that may be leaning against the wall within the year.
We considered the XBox Kinect. Problem with this is we have NO XBox or XBox games, so it would be prohibitively expensive to give as a gift since we would have to invest in the entire system AND games to make it worthwhile. We only planned to spend about $200 on each child this year (we are saving for a new car and are expecting some big medical bills to start arriving any day).

So, he's not getting either of the big gifts I know he would love. He has mentioned some smaller items in passing, and he is getting those. My kids have never been dissapointed on Christmas morning, so I'm sure he'll be happy. But, sometimes, I wish I could do more.

 

[GaSleepingBeautyFan]

What is with kids wanting an Ipod touch this year?

My 15 year old wants one. I'm not even sure what it is. Is it like a cell phone that plays music that you pay a monthly fee for?

He already has a nice cell phone and an Ipod so I'm thinking a big no on the ipod touch but I need to figure out what it is first.

 

[herdtoDisney]

What is with kids wanting an Ipod touch this year?

My 15 year old wants one. I'm not even sure what it is. Is it like a cell phone that plays music that you pay a monthly fee for?

He already has a nice cell phone and an Ipod so I'm thinking a big no on the ipod touch but I need to figure out what it is first.

My son has one, but only because he won it. It plays music and runs apps and can connect to the Web if it is available (like in our house). We don't pay any fees-but it does not function as a phone. It's like a smartphone without the phone component.

I probably would not have bought one (it's $225) since my son already has a basic cellphone, computer and school-issued laptop. The iTouch is kind of redundant in this situation. I also worry about it being stolen and he is not allowed to take it to school. But it is kind of a cool gizmo-I want one

 

[ProudMommyof2]

My kids list to Santa has only been for 1 thing ever. In our house Santa only brings 1 thing, everything else comes from Mom & Dad. That is why we buy toys for the poor- "because otherwise those kids would only get the 1 gift Santa brought them." That gift would have it's own special wrapping paper.

They have always been guaranteed that 1 thing, but my kids are pretty easy to steer in a direction I like. Sometimes if the Santa gift is really big-like the year they got their Wii + accessories- they had to ask Santa for that as a "together gift".

Unfortunately, it looks like the Santa rules are becoming unnecessary in my house because my kids are just getting too dang big- and Santa has become a cute thing Mom loves.

 

[leadfootlevi]

Well, then, it's your kids and my kids vs. the whole rest of the world! Or at least they think so. I threw that in because it was an example of something I just wouldn't buy for my kids -- so if it were on their list, it'd be an automatic "no".

In the spirit of full disclosure, I don't have a TV in my bedroom either.

ROFL! That stuck out at me because my kids swear they are the last kids without personal TV. I won't do it either and they all know it.

You guys are my heros!

 

[GJM]

My DS 10 has an I Touch and it is great for the long car rides to NJ - he listens to music, has some games on it, and watches movies or shows.