Jon and Kate Plus 8 Official Thread - Part 5

[torinsmom]

When my cousin got divorced twenty years ago, the judge ordered the same type of living arrangements. The kids were 10 and 8 I believe. Each parent had a bedroom at the house with a deadbolt on it. Then the kids had their same rooms. The parents ended up getting an apartment for the first year, which they each lived in when it was not their turn to be with the kids. Two bedrooms, deadbolt on bedroom doors. After that, the man ended up remarrying and she had the apt to herself. I think they revisited things when she got remarried, but the kids were teenagers by then.

Anyway, it worked well for the kids, because they didn't have to switch schools, had the same neighborhood friends, same toys, same pets, etc. I think this way is tougher on the parents, but they are the ones who made the mess. I honestly think Jon will end up in NY and not see the kids as much as Kate. He seems to be wrapped up in his own life already and that usually gets worse as time goes on.

Marsha

 

[allison443]

It might be kind of nice for one parent to be able to take one or two kids back to his or her place every once in a while to have special time with the kids outside of the group.

That would probably have to be specificallyworked out in advance and included in the custody agreement, unless by chance Jon and Kate would agree to let that happen from time to time. However, I think at least one of them would object to missing out on "their time" with all the kids, kwim?
Hopefully I'm wrong, and they will amicably work everything out in the best interests of the kids.

 

[allison443]

And the house is also the set for their show. It's been outfitted to film. Their parents are visiting them at work.

I never thought of it like that, interesting perspective.

 

[DMRick]

think the living situation is terrible.
If I were one of those kids, I wouldn't feel like I lived with either of my parents. I would feel like I lived alone in some enormous daycare that never ends along with my brothers and sisters. And every couple days my parents would come to "visit" me at different times. Can you imagine watching your mother pack it up to move back to her own, real home? And then minutes later, here comes daddy and his girlfriend with their suitcases from their real home for a visit with you?

While I doubt this living arrangement will work, I think that because of J & K, not the kids. I think the kids will probably be very happy to stay in one home. They love their parents (at least to me it's obvious) and the parents love them. They didn't fall out of love with the kids.

They won't live along..they will have a parent with them, they just don't have to move and leave their stuff and pets. I doubt the parents will be 'visiting' parents, but parents that will do their best to make a bad situation work. Other divorced parents have had to work out creative visiting.

Until Jon shows up with his girlfriend (I hope he doesn't, but even if the kids went to his home, she could be there) it's just specualting. Do I think at some time, he'll be there less and less? Yes, although that is speculating on my side.

At least they are trying to keep some normalcy in their lives. This is just the begining, they have a lot to work out yet. Kate is very organized (which she has to be with 8 kids very close in age) and she may be able to pull this off, if it works out to be best for the kids. I'm sure not able to think of any other situation that would work better.

 

[DMRick]

With that many kids you have to be organized like that or it would be pure chaos. My family always had "seat assignments". Everyone always sat in the same spot, it's not a big deal.

We did too. Heck, when we have a large group over, we write names on plastic cups LOL.

 

[TanyaLovesPooh]

We did too. Heck, when we have a large group over, we write names on plastic cups LOL.

We also sit in the same places at the table and when more family is over we do the name on the cups too!

So do you suppose they are going to split all the bills at the kid's house? Just divide the expenses down the middle? What about groceries? I don't see this working down the road. I think Kate and the kids will be in the house and the kids will go see Daddy every other weekend at some point.

 

[NEVERENOUGHWDW]

I'm glad to. It proves what kind of man he really is

Exactly one that no longer lives under the iron fist of Kate.

It's about time he had some happiness & he lived life for John not the wants of Kate.

 

[phamton]

I have a good friend that had the same arrangement with their house and this was many years ago. He and his wife divorced when the kids were: 6, 4, and 2 years old. This was over twenty years ago. They each took a month and lived in the house with the kids. So they rotated on a monthly basis. The kids grew up in that house and kept the same schedule with school, gymnastics, sports, etc. This worked remarkably well until the kids were out on their own. I know the husband stayed at his mom's house on the months he wasn't living with the kids and his ex-wife had an apartment. Neither of them re-married and I know the husband never dated although his ex-wife may have.

 

[Mermaid02]

Exactly one that no longer lives under the iron fist of Kate.

It's about time he had some happiness & he lived life for John not the wants of Kate.

He ought to be living for his 8 kids.... not hanging out with some skank in Europe. Can't he find a respectable woman to date? That's right- no respectable woman would touch him with an 8 foot pole. Especially now after Hailey.... ick!!

 

[NEVERENOUGHWDW]

He ought to be living for his 8 kids.... not hanging out with some skank in Europe. Can't he find a respectable woman to date? That's right- no respectable woman would touch him with an 8 foot pole. Especially now after Hailey.... ick!!

WOW are you Kate's sister?
I couldn't disagree with you more.

He lived under a communist reign (named Kate) long enough...it's time for him to break free. More power to him

 

[DMRick]

Exactly one that no longer lives under the iron fist of Kate.

It's about time he had some happiness & he lived life for John not the wants of Kate.

And apparently that's what he wants, rather than working it out (and I have no idea if they did try for help, or how he treated her..I just know what TLC showed us), he becomes a party guy.

Can't wait to see how this plays out with the kids. If I were a betting person, I'd bet that once the show ends, and he blows his money, he might wish he had done things differently. I'd also bet that Kate will always be able to support her children, with or without a show. Jon? Not so much.

 

[DMRick]

WOW are you Kate's sister?
I couldn't disagree with you more.

He lived under a communist reign (named Kate) long enough...it's time for him to break free. More power to him

Ah..do you really know what it's like living under a communist reign? I don't think so. I mean really.

As for how he lived with Kate..he gave it as good as got it and could have done something about it at the time.

 

[DutchsMommy]

WOW are you Kate's sister?
I couldn't disagree with you more.

He lived under a communist reign (named Kate) long enough...it's time for him to break free. More power to him

I dont think you are going to get much sympathy here. While I agree she was not easy to live with, and even if they did try and work it out and decided to split....it is the way he is acting now that is the problem. If he had been a responsible, mature adult and stuck around to work out the best arrangement in teh circumstance then perhaps people would be more willing to accept the split..BUT...he is acting like a college freshman and dropping his responsibilities like a hot potato which is what, I think, is making people have no time or patience for him and his antics. Besides, while Kate may have been a shrew, it takes two to tango!

 

[LoraJ]

I dont think you are going to get much sympathy here. While I agree she was not easy to live with, and even if they did try and work it out and decided to split....it is the way he is acting now that is the problem. If he had been a responsible, mature adult and stuck around to work out the best arrangement in teh circumstance then perhaps people would be more willing to accept the split..BUT...he is acting like a college freshman and dropping his responsibilities like a hot potato which is what, I think, is making people have no time or patience for him and his antics. Besides, while Kate may have been a shrew, it takes two to tango!

 

[MichelleVW]

Exactly one that no longer lives under the iron fist of Kate.

It's about time he had some happiness & he lived life for John not the wants of Kate.

WOW are you Kate's sister?
I couldn't disagree with you more.

He lived under a communist reign (named Kate) long enough...it's time for him to break free. More power to him

So, you basically don't care about the poor children that are seeing their father out with some skank? I don't care how awful you think Kate is/was, I'm sure his current behavior is hurting the children most of all.

 

[allison443]

So do you suppose they are going to split all the bills at the kid's house? Just divide the expenses down the middle? What about groceries? I don't see this working down the road. I think Kate and the kids will be in the house and the kids will go see Daddy every other weekend at some point.

This is such an unusual case as far as splitting expenses post-divorce. I think a lot depends on how TLC pays them. Do J & K receive individual paychecks? Do they receive the same amount? Should one parent get more if they film more hours or more days? Is any money put directly in kids' accounts by TLC or is that up to Jon and Kate? Are all funds put into one account? Are the earnings from Kate's books separate? Is any of that money used for support of the kids, will she want to use "her" money to maintain the house if it's jointly owned, etc. What if Jon gets a clothing deal with Ed Hardy or whoever, will he pay from those funds or will the kids be supported with the show earnings? Will Jon and Kate be able to spend whatever they want, like on trips with a girlfriend or does the other parent have a say in how they spend this jointly earned money?

In "normal" divorces the parents' earnings are used to determine support for the kids. But with the Gosselins, it's like the kids are earning their own support from doing the show, kwim?

There are going to be a lot of issues...

 

[allison443]

I was just thinking that if Jon and Kate are filming separately with the family, then the kids will be filming/working all of that time, and Jon and Kate will each only be working half as much as the kids!

 

[NEVERENOUGHWDW]

I dont think you are going to get much sympathy here. While I agree she was not easy to live with, and even if they did try and work it out and decided to split....it is the way he is acting now that is the problem. If he had been a responsible, mature adult and stuck around to work out the best arrangement in teh circumstance then perhaps people would be more willing to accept the split..BUT...he is acting like a college freshman and dropping his responsibilities like a hot potato which is what, I think, is making people have no time or patience for him and his antics. Besides, while Kate may have been a shrew, it takes two to tango!

Not seeking sympathy. Just stating my thought & opinions.
I learned a long time ago that this thread was the man haters club

Of course I care for the children. I am also one of the few that believe Kate treating anyone the way she did around her children is teaching them that it is acceptable to be just as brutal as she is.

This show needs to be off the air to save these kids.

 

[TanyaLovesPooh]

He ought to be living for his 8 kids....

Exactly, thank you.

 

[Dr_Finkelstein]

Not seeking sympathy. Just stating my thought & opinions.
I learned a long time ago that this thread was the man haters club

Of course I care for the children. I am also one of the few that believe Kate treating anyone the way she did around her children is teaching them that it is acceptable to be just as brutal as she is.

This show needs to be off the air to save these kids.

Everyone is just stating their opinion also.

And if you read back you'll see this is definately not a 'man haters club'. Where did you get that idea? We state our opinions about the show and the people in it - you may or may not agree.

And if anyone at the moment is teaching their kids how not to behave it doesn't look like Kate.

Personally though, I'm hoping my son can one day grow up to be the type of man who decides to leave his wife and children and take up with a girl 10+yrs his junior who has a drug conviction in her past........every mothers dream.